She Shall Have Music (Psychic Seasons

by ReGina Welling

  _,.-'~'-.,_

  Sally gently tapped on her daughter’s bedroom door. Forced laughter had not fooled her in the least, something was wrong and she meant to know what it was.

  “Come in.” The command so soft Sally barely heard it.

  She opened the door to see her daughter huddled under the covers, tears slowly coursing down her cheeks.

  Two short steps carried her across the room to sit on the edge of the bed and gather the younger woman into her arms.

  “Oh baby, what’s happened? Tell me about it, maybe I can help.”

  “It’s Reid.”

  So, the rumors were true. “I’d heard he quit his job and went off somewhere.”

  “Somewhere turned out to be Oakville. What’s worse is that he somehow ended up at my friend’s house. How’s that for a coincidence?” Sally didn’t believe in coincidence—she had that in common with Gustavia.

  “That must have been quite a shock.”

  “You haven’t heard the half of it. He never filed the divorce papers. Mom, we’re still married. All this time and I had no idea.”

  Whatever Sally had expected, it hadn’t been anything like this. Her mouth dropped open but no words would come.

  Her mother’s blatant surprise actually made Amethyst feel a little better. Sometimes kindred emotions had that effect on a person.

  “I just—I don’t know what to say.”

  “I know, right? He wasn’t even sorry about it.”

  That bit of news was no big surprise. Reid had been devastated by the split. More than once, Sally and her husband had come home to find him camped out on their front step. He had begged and pleaded with them to tell him where his wife had gone. Heartbroken and sympathetic, Sally kept her daughter’s secret even though it had cost her to cause him pain when from her perspective, a bit more maturity would have solved the problem that caused them to split up in the first place. “He loved you,” she said simply.

  Amethyst sighed. “I know. He says he still does.”

  That brought no surprise as Sally simply nodded. Reid had a good heart and a father who had put him in an unenviable situation that had caused her daughter a great deal of pain. Yet, it wasn’t in her heart to hate him. Not when his biggest crime had been trying to find the best way to provide for the wife he loved.

  “Do you love him?”

  “I don’t know.” That statement earned her a slanted look from her mother. “Okay, fine. I still love him. I probably always will. What if it happens again? I have to be who I am. I read auras. Can he handle what I do? I help people and I love that part of my life.” She paused then said, “Mom, there’s more.”

  Holding nothing back, she told Sally everything that had been happening in her life, from Logan and Julie’s search to Gustavia and her recent family reunion. Then finally, about Galmadriel and the possibility of enhancing her aura reading ability.

  Sally never batted an eye at her daughter’s story of ghosts and now an angel. She had her own stories of a brush or two with the paranormal, though these were revelations for another day.

  “Tell me what to do.”

  “Oh darling, you know I can’t do that. You have to make your own decisions because you are the one who has to live with the consequences. Sometimes love is enough to see a couple through all the ups and downs of life and sometimes it isn’t. If it feels right to give yourselves a second chance, then you should. Or, if you think building back the trust you once had is impossible, you need to find a way to set him free. Tonight, though, I suggest you sleep on it. See how you feel tomorrow. There’s no rush to decide is there?”

  “Not about Reid, he seems to think he can wait me out. Galmadriel, on the other hand, I think she will be expecting a decision soon and I’m not sure I can give her one.”

  Sally countered with a question of her own, “What exactly does it mean when you clear someone’s aura? How does it help them?”

  Amethyst took a moment to frame her answer.

  “Everyone has stress in their lives from work, relationships, health—whatever they are dealing with. Sometimes that stress goes on so long people forget how to let it go so that when the situation ends, a little bit of that stress remains. Then, each time that person encounters another stressful situation, more and more of it piles on until they become completely stuck and it shows in their aura. I help them release that negative energy and come back to balance, to positivity. Their problems don’t go away but they have more energy to deal with them.”

  “Where does the negative energy go? Not into you, I hope.”

  With a small shudder, Amethyst answered, “No, I’d be a total wreck if I had to take on everyone’s problems but that’s not how it works. When it’s released, the energy becomes—I guess—inert would be the best word; not positive or negative but just neutral. It goes back to—well, it has different names—the source, God, the universe, a higher power, Mother Earth. Everyone has their own definition for it but it all feels like the same thing to me.”

  “God? You stopped going to church a long time ago.” It wasn’t a condemnation, only an observation.

  “And, I’ve just met an energy being who called herself an angel. What’s your point, Mom?”

  “No point, I’m just trying to understand.”

  “My problems with religion have more to do with the people involved in it than the deities. I have to believe there is some type of conscious awareness, something bigger than us.”

  “It doesn’t seem as though an angel would offer you something that wasn’t for your greater good.” Sally saw it that way and Amethyst decided not to tell her how the angel had nearly choked the life out of her with an energy burst. Maybe Galmadriel’s motives were pure but that little trick had not been very persuasive.

  “I can’t make the decision for you and I wouldn’t even if I could. You know I’ll be here for you whatever you decide. Now get some rest. You’ve had a rough time of it,” and with a kiss on the forehead, Sally left Amethyst alone to sleep.

  Even though she felt much relieved, sleep remained elusive. Maybe coming home where there were so many reminders of her life with Reid had been a bad idea. Lying on the twin bed tucked under the slanted ceiling, she counted the old-fashioned, blue roses that marched across the wallpaper in a repeating pattern. Every third rose looked like a smiling face. When she was little, she thought they looked like a line of angels watching over her. It was a comforting thought that tonight brought no solace whatsoever.

  This room contained too many things that took her back in time—back to Reid. First place riding ribbons won while he stood ringside. The pink enamel frame decorated with a spiral pattern that had once held their prom picture now empty and the photograph stashed away in a break up box on the top shelf of the closet in her tiny home.

  She ran her finger over the tiny heart with an R she’d drawn on her headboard in what had turned out to be indelible ink—lightened now by repeated attempts to clean it off before her mother saw it, but still faintly legible.

  The thought surfaced that their relationship was like that mark, worn by attempts to scrub it away but somehow it endured.

  Melancholy was the word for this mood.

  She turned off the light.

  Five minutes later, she turned it back on, opened the desk drawer, and rooted around for pen and paper.

  A pros and cons list. That would give her some perspective.

  For the next few minutes, the only sound in the room was the tapping of her pen on the table while she stared out the window at the nearly full moon. At last, she scratched out a single entry on each list.

  Pros: He loves me

  Cons: He loves me

  Crumpling the paper into the smallest, tightest possible ball and lobbing it into the trash did not provide the hoped for stress release. Meditation finally brought sleep but not for a long time.

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  It was a cloudless autumn Sunday. A robin’s egg blue sky played backdrop against torch-shap
ed trees, some still clothed in saturated reds and yellows. Rolling hills to the right of the two-lane country road arched softly against the blue, while wheat-colored fields bordered on the left. Unseasonable weather kept it warm enough for open-windowed driving, the air hung with the dry, powdery smell rising from the crisp fallen leaves that blanketed parts of the road. It was the kind of day that made a person thankful to be alive.

  Too preoccupied with her thoughts, Amethyst barely noticed.

  Instead, various scenarios played themselves out in her imagination. Reid would win her back by promising his undying love and they would have three beautiful children. Two boys and a girl; all with the ability to see auras.

  Or, they wouldn’t and she would die a lonely, childless, cat lady.

  That’s just ridiculous, it’s not like he’s the only man in the world, Amethyst chided herself for nihilistic thinking and ignored the small voice in the back of her mind that insisted on suggesting that for her, he just might be.

  To take her mind off the constant seesaw of emotions, she stopped at her favorite flea market. Seven or eight small sheds ringed a semi-circular parking area. Ranged around the sheds, more vendors had set up canopy tents stuffed with tables and racks of items from the sublime to the ridiculous. One vendor had a sizable collection of Fiesta ware and an even larger collection of bottles containing medical specimens. Where else could you buy a surgically removed appendix for the small sum of $25.00 and why was she tempted to buy one?

  An hour slipped by as she pored through the multitude of offerings. The vendor at the next to last shed in line had a handful of cat related items. Tommy was about to become the proud owner of a carpet-covered kitty tree. He’d probably hate it. Or, more accurately, he’d turn his back on it with an expressive flick of the tail, give her that look, the one that clearly said, “Human, please,” and then as soon as she wasn’t looking, climb all over it.

  With a smile and some shameless flirting, she talked the guy down to ten bucks and got him to help load it in her car where it stuck out the back window a bit.

  It may have been the heavenly smells coming from the food truck at the far end of the market or just that she had lost track of time and it was well past lunch that made her stomach lurch and growl.

  Picking her way past several interesting looking vendors and refusing to get distracted again, Amethyst approached the source of those amazing smells to order a gourmet mushroom burger with sweet potato fries.

  The food, shopping, and fresh air helped clear her mind. If she cut away all the noise, what remained was truth. She was married and Reid wanted to stay that way. Problem was, he still felt like cheesecake to her—something she might crave but would probably be better off without.

  No, that wasn’t fair.

  Sitting alone at a picnic table in the middle of a glorified yard sale was not the place one might expect to have an epiphany but the anonymity of this place—busy but with her as an island at its edge—allowed her to look back and evaluate the past objectively. He hadn’t meant to hurt her. The hot redness of shame crept along her neck. She had run away like a child and abandoned her husband, yet he still wanted her back.

  Knowing that he did made her heart soar. For a minute. Until she realized just how much distance there was between the two of them. Before she could talk herself out of it, she texted Julie and asked for Reid’s number, keyed it into her phone, quickly composed another text:

  We need to talk. Dinner tonight? —Amethyst

  His response was swift in coming:

  Sure. 6pm?

  Amethyst replied:

  I’ll meet you at Julie’s place.

  A flock of butterflies launched themselves into frantic flight in her stomach. Wait—flock? Was that the right term? Herd? No, maybe a flight. To try and settle the fluttering, she looked it up on her phone. The technical term was kaleidoscope. Pretty word that sounded exactly right.

  The tickling lurch of nerves added a level of excitement to combat the dread she was feeling. If she could just concentrate on the good memories—and there were plenty of those—instead of the painful ones, this dinner would go well. If—such a little word with big meaning.

  When she picked up Tommy from Mishka, he treated her to his patented, how-dare-you-leave-me stare then refused to look at her again. Leaving him to get acquainted with his new toys, Amethyst tore into her closet to choose some proper date attire. Bits of purple clothing flew onto the bed, missed the bed, landed on the floor and by the time she was done, one pair of leggings was dangling from a lamp.

  To add another complication, Tommy leapt onto the pile, rolled and came back up onto his feet in a playful mood. He was impossible to resist so she moved the clothes and took time for a game of kitty toy toss before deciding on a pair of leggings in vibrant, electric purple. These she topped with a long, embroidered tunic with a Nehru collar.

  By the time she pulled to a stop in front of Hayward House, the butterflies had turned into pterodactyls—big, vicious beasts with claws and teeth and beaks. Whatever the group name for those might be, she knew it could not be as pretty sounding as a kaleidoscope.

  A date. It had been a very long time since the prospect of going out to dinner had caused such a nervous reaction.

  The drive to Hayward House passed way too quickly.

  Julie answered the door, provided a supportive hug and led Amethyst to the living room where Reid was waiting. Her whispered comment of, “He’s nervous, too,” did help release some of the tension but the sight of him ratcheted it right back up to the level of a scream and she actively had to resist the temptation to go to him and run a hand through his carefully groomed hair.

  Reid swallowed twice and admitted to himself that purple had just become his new favorite color.

  “Let’s take my car,” he suggested as he followed her out the door. The day remained warm enough for top-down driving and being male, he wanted to show off his wheels.

  “Sure, if you let me drive,” she waggled her eyebrows at him and he remembered her affinity for fast cars. Glancing over at the battered Honda, he knew she hadn’t had the means to indulge herself recently so he tossed her the keys.

  “Mmm,” Amethyst couldn’t hold back a hum of appreciation for the finely tuned machine as she downshifted and stomped the pedal. The car leapt under her control as, head back and laughing, she poured on the speed. “Oh, you’re a pretty baby, aren’t you?” She crooned to the car, nearly forgetting the man who watched her with an indulgent grin lighting up his face.

  Wind teased strands of hair across her face and she shook them off with a head toss. The drive into Oakville was all too short; she had barely enough time to explore the car’s capabilities before pulling into the municipal parking lot.

  “Fun ride.” It was a compliment and he took it as one. “I’m thinking Italian or seafood. Any preference?”

  What he wanted was some privacy.

  “Someplace quiet.” Not Tassone’s, then. Great Italian food with a family atmosphere made it a busy venue.

  “Seafood it is.” She led him a short way down the street toward a door decorated with fishing nets and floats. From the front, the place looked like a hole in the wall, but once inside, he could see the restaurant opened up. The entire, bow-shaped back wall was a series of floor to ceiling windows providing a panoramic view of the lake where several local sailboat owners were taking advantage of what might be the last warm weekend before cocooning their toys for the winter. Another hour or so before sunset saw the light wind gently tugging at sails, belling them while the boats skimmed over the lake’s slightly choppy surface. Framed by brilliant autumn foliage, colorful triangles cheerfully contrasted with the slowly deepening blue of the sky; each moment presented a new, soothing image.

  Efficient staff seated them at a table with an unobstructed view and the couple settled in to watch the bustling activity as boaters maneuvered their way in to tie off at the piers.

  Amethyst tried to relax. It seemed impera
tive she calm her jangling nerves enough to say what needed to be said.

  “Reid, I…” She broke off as plates of succulent seafood were placed in front of them and by the time the waiter walked away, she felt as though the moment had passed. Without thinking, they fell into an old habit; she ordered one dish and he another. When the food came, they each scraped half their choices onto the other’s plate.

  For the next few minutes, all conversation centered on the food. Reid wanted to remind her of some of her more spectacular cooking failures but he wasn’t sure she was ready for a walk down memory lane. He was right.

  Once the small talk was exhausted, Amethyst started to feel squirmy. Words needed to be said. Apologies and explanations to be made. So, why was her head completely empty?

  A furtive movement outside the window drew her attention. It couldn’t be. She looked again.

  Logan. It looked like Logan stumbling past the glass. With a choked cry, she threw her napkin on the table and bolted out the door leaving Reid just sitting there with his mouth hanging open.

  Had he said something wrong? He didn’t think so.

  Reid tossed a handful of bills on the table and followed her out the door. If she thought she could just walk away from him again, she was in for a surprise.

  Chapter 6

  The restaurant door slammed shut behind him making a loud cracking sound that he ignored. Which way had she gone? He glanced left but turned right to stalk down the sidewalk, anger lending volume to the beat of his shoes on the pavement.

  Ten long paces, then twenty before he saw furtive movement ahead. Good grief, the woman stood out. What on earth was she doing? It wasn’t as if he planned on forcing himself on her. They had been enjoying a very nice meal and some light conversation and getting to know each other again, until she freaked out for whatever reason.

  “Amethyst…” He called out.

  She turned and motioned for him to be quiet. It was then that he realized this might not be about him at all.