The Mommy Plan

by Susan Gable

  “Can do.”

  James directed Don to Rosemary’s location and raced out the ER’s automatic doors. He hustled down the sidewalk.

  Rachel hadn’t gotten far. He found her about fifty feet from the entrance, hugging a streetlight.

  “How do you feel?” he asked softly.

  “Like I was tap-dancing in combat boots on somebody’s damask tablecloth and they yanked it out from under me. Only I didn’t stay upright.” She clutched the lamppost tighter.

  “Still a little dizzy?”

  “No, I’m holding this light because it’s lonely.”

  “Oh, really? This is the first time I’ve seen your sarcastic side.” He looped his arm around her waist. “Come on.” He led her toward a nearby bench.

  “Well get ready, because next you’re going to see my inside when I throw up my guts along with that lasagna.” She moaned as he lowered her to a sitting position and pressed her head forward.

  “Put your head between your knees and take deep breaths.”

  She did as he instructed. He rubbed her back lightly.

  After a minute, she looked up at him. “Just please tell me that wasn’t Don with you when I came to. Tell me I was hallucinating.”

  “You want me to lie to you? Why does it matter?”

  Her shoulders inched toward her ears, then dropped back down. “I have to sit up.” She straightened, running a hand over her hair. The whisper of her sigh floated along the warm breeze.

  He waited.

  “Take me back to camp, James.” She rose from the bench, digging in her pocket. He stood. The keys jingled as she passed them to him. “Let’s put the top down and ride with the wind in our hair and pretend we’re young and foolish, without a care in the world.”

  Unshed tears shimmered in her eyes as she lifted her face and offered him an obviously forced smile.

  He folded her into his arms and held her tightly, offering comfort. He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, the tangy, lemony scent of her skin and hair stirring feelings of protectiveness in him. “We can do that.”

  And he could pretend it was all about sex.

  And forget the fact that he was starting to really care about this brave and vulnerable woman.

  A woman who couldn’t set foot in a hospital.

  Unlike him and his daughter, who had come to regard Children’s Hospital as a second home.

  Damn it to hell, why couldn’t he pick suitable women?

  The wind ruffled his hair as he guided the Goat along the back-country roads. The engine’s purr registered only vaguely in his mind. The full moon offered its light from a cloudless sky filled with stars.

  Rachel tugged the ponytail holder from her hair, letting it fly free. The blond strands whipped around her face. “That’s better.”

  “Are you ready to talk about what happened in the hospital?”

  She turned sideways in the seat as far as her seat belt would allow. Her index and middle fingers pressed gently on his lips. “Not a care in the world, James, remember?”

  “And I’ve told you what happens when you deny and suppress, remember?” He kissed her fingertips to buffer the sting of his words.

  “I thought you were my friend?”

  “I am your friend. And friends talk about things that trouble them.”

  “I hate hospitals. I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “But, Rachel—”

  She leaned over and cranked on the radio, filling the night air with the loud twang of country music. From the depths of her purse, she pulled out gold-wrapped butterscotch candies, silently offering him one as she popped another into her mouth. He shook his head.

  She dropped the candy back into her purse, which she then tucked under the seat. She folded her arms across her chest and turned to look out the side of the car.

  The message was loud and clear.

  James shifted on the seat, Nolan’s plastic “pager” biting into his butt—an unwelcome reminder of where the evening had been headed earlier.

  Pretend to be young and foolish, without a care in the world?

  He wasn’t sure he remembered how.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  “WHAT-IF” WASN’T A GAME Rachel liked to play. It hurt too much. But tonight, if James hadn’t been there with his CPR skills, a man might have died.

  The radio and the Goat’s engine fell silent as James shut off the ignition. He removed the keys and held them out to her. “Thanks for letting me drive.”

  “I wasn’t in any shape, and we both know it.”

  “You let me drive to the restaurant, too.”

  She shrugged. “I thought you’d enjoy it.” Bending down, she retrieved her purse from beneath the seat, then climbed from the car. Wordlessly, they worked together to put the convertible’s top up.

  James circled around the car to her side. “Rachel, I’m sorry things didn’t go better. Not exactly what I had in mind for our date.”

  “Me, neither.” She tipped her head back and looked up at him. “But the night’s not over yet. I was thinking about taking a walk down by the lake. Would you like to come?”

  His fingers brushed over her hair. “Yes, I would.”

  “Okay. Just let me get some things.” She opened the trunk. An old comforter—one she and Daniel had often used for picnics—and a flashlight lay in the corner. Rachel pulled them out, clicking the light on. “I found a wonderful place. Follow me, but watch your step. There are a lot of rocks and roots in the path.”

  The moon added its glow, filtering down through the gently swaying trees. Weeds and tall grass covered what had once been a viable path; low shrubs encroached along the edges. Rachel picked her way along the route.

  It led to a small, manmade beach along a secluded cove, tucked away from the main part of the lake. Rachel loved the spot and had come here several times. “Here we are.” She spread out the comforter on the sand, then sank down on it. “What do you think?”

  James lowered himself beside her. “How did you find this? It’s great.”

  “On one of my early-morning walks.” She tipped her head back. “Just look at all those stars.”

  James shifted until he sat behind her, his legs surrounding hers, arms enfolding her waist. “How’s that?”

  With a contented sigh, she relaxed, molding her body against his, allowing her head to rest against his shoulder. “It’s nice,” she murmured. “Very nice.”

  “Mmm, I think so, too.”

  The companionable silence was broken only by the occasional throaty love song of a frog and the ripples of the nearby water. A balmy breeze gently fanned her loose hair. Rachel snuggled deeper into the warmth of the man who held her so tenderly.

  Fireflies flickered in the shrubs and grasses surrounding their private spot. “Molly would have a field day with all these fireflies,” she said.

  “Probably.” James nuzzled her hair.

  “They’re like echoes of the stars.” Rachel tipped her head again and studied the heavens. “Doesn’t nature make you feel small and insignificant?”

  “Small and insignificant? Not really. Awestruck at the vastness of it all, maybe. Is that the same as feeling small?”

  She said nothing for several moments as the lake lapped gently along the shore.

  “I realized something tonight,” she said finally.

  “What’s that?”

  “Life’s short. It’s just a blip in the grand scheme of things.” Her hand swept across the air. “Just a blip. I realized that if there are things you want in life, you shouldn’t put them off, you should go ahead and do them. I mean, Daniel,” she sighed, “Daniel wanted to get on a big yellow school bus and go to kindergarten. There’s no way I could have speeded that up for him. But take Henry and Rosemary. Maybe they’ve always wanted to go to Europe but kept putting it off. Tonight, they almost ran out of chances.”

  He cupped her face with his hand, thumb lightly caressing her cheekbone. “And what is it you want before you run out of
chances, sweet Rachel?”

  Heat rose beneath the skin he stroked, spreading across her face and down her body. She swallowed hard, then took the plunge. “You,” she whispered. “I want you.”

  His thumb stilled on her face. He closed his eyes. “Rachel, I…”

  A sharp pain radiated across her chest, into her stomach. Had she misread him earlier? “Don’t you feel the same way?”

  His eyes flashed open. “I want you, Rachel. It’s just…”

  “What?”

  “I can’t promise you a future, and you deserve someone who can give you that kind of security.”

  Her heart warmed and softened, a marshmallow over an open flame. “Oh, James. That’s the first time anyone has put my needs first.”

  “And I mean it.” He dipped his head, barely brushing his lips over hers.

  She closed her eyes and angled her head, waiting to feel his mouth on hers.

  Suddenly his hand left her face. Startled, she opened her eyes to see him jump to his feet.

  “James, wait!” She leapt up as well. “Don’t go.”

  “Rachel, I’m sorry. But if I stay here, I’m going to do something you might regret in the morning.”

  “Something like make love to me? Like I want you to?” She didn’t wait for his answer. Life was too short, and James was a very special man. She stepped close to him and flattened her palms against his chest. “I’m not asking for forever, James. I’m not even asking for tomorrow. I’m interested in right now, tonight. This moment may well be all we ever have, but I’m not willing to let it go by.” She slipped her hands between his elbows and torso, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Are you?”

  He didn’t move.

  She let her fingers explore the broad planes of his back. Could she seduce him? That was something else she’d never done. Throwing caution into the lake, she trailed her right hand lower, caressed the firm curve of his behind.

  James inhaled sharply. His hips moved forward, pressing his erection against her belly. “Rachel…”

  She lifted her fingers to his lips, lightly traced their outline. “Your mouth says no, but your body says yes.” She slipped her arm from around his waist and stepped back. “But, if you really don’t want to…”

  She crossed to the center of the comforter, kicking off her sandals. Her fingers opened the top two buttons of her blouse.

  “W-what are you doing?”

  “Well, I’ve never gone skinny-dipping. And I think that’s one of those things that should definitely be experienced in life, don’t you?” Her fingers continued to work on the row of buttons as she talked.

  The moonlight caressed her bare shoulders as she slowly lowered the garment. James wanted to be that moonbeam, sliding across her satiny skin. A lacy bra cupped her small breasts. She tossed the blouse to the edge of the comforter and lowered her hand to the button on her capris.

  He had to remind himself to breathe.

  The rasp of the zipper teeth echoed loudly in the little cove. She shimmied the tight denim over her hips, turning around to give him a full view of that perfect backside as the pants dropped to her feet.

  “Oh, God.” A thong. The woman actually wore a tiny, sexy, satin thong. “Rachel.” He barely recognized his own voice, it was so raspy and thick.

  She turned back to face him, a vision in moonlight and skimpy lingerie. “Something wrong?”

  “Yeah. You take my breath away.”

  She dipped her head, a shy smile on her lips.

  Two quick strides brought him to her. He cradled her face in his hands. “You’re absolutely sure about this?”

  She nodded.

  He lowered his head and kissed her. Hard. Sweet butterscotch, warm woman… He slid his hands around her back, trailing down her smooth skin. The strings of her thong guided him lower, and he lightly ran his fingers over her curves. He tucked his hands around the silken flesh, pulled her against him.

  Her tiny shudder and moan deepened his desire. He trailed kisses down her neck, lingering in the hollow of her throat.

  Her hands pulled frantically at his shirt. “I want to feel you against me.”

  He yanked it over his head and dropped it to the ground. “This, too,” he said, reaching behind her to struggle with the clasp of her bra. His out-of-practice fingers fumbled until the fabric gave way. He slid the straps down her arms and tossed the garment aside, too.

  She pressed against him, the hard tips of her breasts igniting flames of desire.

  He scooped her up and placed her on the blanket, propping himself on his elbow over her.

  She folded her arms over her chest, a flicker of apprehension in her eyes.

  “Don’t cover them, Rachel.” He gently moved her arms, watching her face carefully. “I want to look at you.”

  She pressed her lips tightly together. “They’re…”

  “Beautiful,” he pronounced. With one fingertip, he teased the nipple to attention.

  “Small.” She gasped as he cupped her breast in his palm.

  “Perfect. Good things come in small packages.”

  “I’d like to know your reaction if I say that when you drop your pants.”

  Laughter erupted from deep in his belly. “Aah, Rachel. You do make me feel young and foolish, like I haven’t a care in the world.” He leaned over to nibble on her earlobe, then whispered, “But I don’t think I’ll disappoint you.”

  She smiled and caressed him through his jeans. “Me, neither.”

  He groaned and grabbed her wrist in a viselike grip. “Honey, I’ve ached all night over you. It’s been such a long time for me, and all I want to do is bury myself deep inside you. You touch me like that and the fireworks will be over before we even get started.”

  She flexed her fingers, teasing him with a light touch even while he still held her hand. “Really?”

  His turn to gasp. “Really. Wicked…sexy… woman.”

  “Only with you,” she whispered. “You make me feel that way.”

  “Your husband was an idiot.”

  She giggled and stroked him again.

  He lowered his head and hesitated, his warm mouth poised just over her breast, just out of reach, teasing, tormenting. “Two can play like that.” He circled her nipple with the tip of his tongue, making her moan. “Why don’t you tell me the pleasurable image you pictured back in the restaurant? The one that made you flush so nicely and catch your breath?”

  She ran her fingers through his hair. “Oh, uh, you’re on the right…right track.”

  He lifted his head and grinned at her. “Really? Let me see if I can follow the track correctly.” He showered her body with kisses, starting between her breasts and trailing lower. She sucked in her breath when he kissed her navel, then circled it with his tongue, but stopped breathing completely when he probed just under the elastic of her thong. “Don’t hold your breath, Rachel. I don’t want you fainting again. It’s tough on the male ego during sex—unless you wait until your climax. Then, by all means, go ahead.” He winked. Grinning up at her from between her thighs, he placed his mouth gingerly on her panties.

  Rachel felt scorching heat rocket through her. “You—you don’t have to…”

  “No, I don’t have to. I want to. Lift up.”

  She raised her hips and he peeled the thong from her body.

  She clutched at the comforter when he began to lavish the attention of his mouth on her. Nimble fingers joined the game, leaving her panting when they teased and retreated.

  She scrunched her eyes shut. He increased the pace of his actions until she finally exploded. “James!” She rode the strong climax that washed over her.

  Eventually, she opened her eyes to find him blocking her view of the sky, a Cheshire cat grin on his face. “Pleasurable stimulus?”

  She nodded, unable to speak.

  “Good. Now that we’ve had the appetizer, how about the main course?” He pressed his lower body against hers, and she realized that he’d shed his pants. And shor
ts.

  His naked arousal skimmed the juncture of her thighs, and panic overwhelmed her. “Wait! James, wait.” She shoved against his chest. “We can’t. Not without—”

  “Easy, sweetheart. I know.” He reached to the side and held up a packet. “Not without this. Guaranteed fresh, okay? It hasn’t been on the shelf forever.”

  Tears filled her eyes and she blinked them back. His consideration knew no bounds. How many men would remember her concern? She smiled, hoping her lips didn’t quiver. “Thank you.”

  He caressed her body with his fingers and mouth, increasing her desire again. “Ready?” he murmured against her neck.

  “Oh, yes. I want you inside me.”

  He rolled away for only a moment, preparing himself, then he hovered over her. “Rachel, this might be a little fast, if so—”

  “Shh. Don’t talk!” Hands around his bottom, she urged him forward.

  In one easy motion, he was inside her.

  “Oh, sweet Rachel.”

  She felt him struggle for control. He slid out, starting a slow tempo. His fingers slipped between their sweat-slicked bodies to caress her where they joined.

  “Oh, James!”

  “That’s it, Rachel. Come with me.”

  As she let herself go, Rachel felt James launch himself with her. His elbow trembled with the exertion of holding himself over her. He kissed her thoroughly, then dropped down beside her, rolled onto his back, and gathered her into his arms.

  Their ragged breathing slowly evened out, and the roaring in her ears gave way to the sounds of the night: the wind in the trees and the frog chorus. James tugged the edges of the comforter around them and nuzzled the top of her head. “That was incredible.”

  “Mmm.” Her fingers traced lazy spirals on his stomach. “It sure was.”

  Her naked body pressed against his, combined with the lemony scent of her skin, the fresh air. In the stillness he could hear the murmur of a nearby brook feeding into the lake. Blessed relaxation stole through his body, loosening every muscle, dissolving all the tension. “This beats a hammock any day,” he murmured.

  “A hammock? You’ve done it in a hammock?” He chuckled. “No, I mean for relaxing. I don’t think I’ve felt this good in…maybe never.”