Pretty Is as Pretty Does

by Debby Mayne

  Jimmy walks in as we’re on our way out. “Hey, where y’all goin’?” he asks.

  “The preparty’s over,” I say, discreetly pointing to Pete, who is staggering along beside me. “Laura had to leave, so he’s going with us.”

  With a nod of understanding, Jimmy puts Pete’s neck into a vice grip. “Hey, old man, why don’t you ride over with me so we can let these two lovebirds have some time to themselves?”

  I cringe, but Tim grins. “That’s okay,” I say. “We told Laura we would take him.”

  “I haven’t had a drop to drink,” Jimmy assures me. “We’ll be fine. I’d kind of like someone to talk to.”

  Tim looks down at me, waiting for an answer, so I nod. “I s’pose that would be okay, as long as y’all go straight there.”

  Jimmy laughs. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you was somebody’s mama.” He noogies Pete’s head. “C’mon, let’s get goin’. We don’t want to miss nothin’.”

  Tim and I wait in the parking lot until we see Jimmy and Pete pull out. “That sure was nice of Jimmy,” Tim says.

  “I don’t know. Those two have been frenemies for a long time, and I don’t know which is worse. When they’re friends, they get in trouble together, but when they’re enemies, they fight.” I crinkle my nose. “And sometimes there’s blood.”

  Tim laughs. “That’s the best part.”

  Now we’re at the school, where a couple of the off-duty cops are directing traffic. The student parking lot is full, so we head for the faculty parking.

  “Even after all this time, I feel like we’ll get in trouble for parking here,” I say as Tim opens my door, playing the part of perfect gentleman to a T.

  We chat about how things have changed since high school, until we get to the door of the gym. Celeste is sitting behind the table with the guestbook. “Sign in here, please,” she says without looking up.

  I lean over and whisper, “You look great, Celeste. I love that dress.”

  She glances up at me, and for a moment, I’m not sure what she’s thinking. Then she smiles, and I relax. “Jimmy told me I’m the prettiest girl here,” she whispers back and points to the table next to her. “Your nametag has your table number on it.”

  It has never dawned on me that Celeste and Jimmy would ever be interested in each other, but now that I think about it, they would make a cute couple. “Have fun,” I say as we take our nametags and leave the reception table.

  “We’re at table number four,” Tim says, handing me my nametag.

  32

  Tim

  I can tell Priscilla all day long how good she looks, but she still won’t get that she’s the best looking woman here. She knows I’ve wanted to be with her, so I reckon she assumes I’m just doing a sales job. In the beauty supply world, I’m a top-notch salesman. With Priscilla, not so much.

  Here comes that Trudy girl looking miserable and way skinnier than I saw her less than a week ago. Put her body up next to a cane pole, and unless she’s facin’ me, I wouldn’t know which one was her. Must be the dress. I hear women say all the time that black is slimmin’. In her case, it’s way more than that.

  “Hey, Priscilla,” she says as she approaches our table. She leans over and whispers in Priscilla’s ear. “Have you seen Michael?” I bet she don’t realize how loud she is, and I smell a little liquid courage on her breath.

  Priscilla leans away from her, which puts her even closer to me. I take advantage of the opportunity to put my arm around her and softly rub her arm that’s smooth as silk. Hey, I’m a guy, so whaddya expect?

  “Why don’t you have a seat?” Priscilla tells Trudy.

  Trudy eyes the chair next to Priscilla before nodding and nearly falling into it. “Want me to get you somethin’ to eat, Trudy?” I ask.

  “What do they have?” She props her elbow on the table, but it slips, and she nearly falls off the chair.

  “How much have you had to drink?” Priscilla asks.

  Trudy holds up her hand and puts her thumb and first finger about a half inch apart. “Maybe this much?”

  “Have you eaten anything?”

  Shaking her head, Trudy replies, “Not today.”

  Priscilla turns to me. “Tim, would you please get Trudy a plate of food? If they have something with protein, that would help.”

  I hop up out of my chair but pause before heading for the refreshment table. “How about you, Priscilla? Want anything?”

  “A little something might be good.”

  When I arrive at the table packed with all kinds of sandwiches, chips, and veggie platters, I look around for some meat. That’s the only thing I know about that has protein.

  “Hungry?” I hear from behind. I spin around and see a couple of girls from the night before. Sure do wish I could remember their names.

  “Oh, hi.” I point to the table. “What do you think has the most protein in it here?” Might as well take advantage of the situation.

  One of the girls points to a sandwich in the corner. “That’s tuna. It has protein.” Then she turns to me. “So are you and Priscilla Slater . . . an item? Or are you just good friends?”

  I hate being put on the spot like that, so I shrug. “Why don’t you ask Priscilla?”

  She gets even closer to me, making me squirm. “Because you’re here, and she’s over there.”

  I’m fully aware that some girls are attracted to me, and that used to get me all big-headed, but not anymore. When girls come on to me before they know anything about me besides the way I look or that I have a job, I can’t get too excited. “It doesn’t matter what my relationship with Priscilla is, I’m her date tonight, and that’s the way it’s gonna stay.”

  The girls look at each other and burst into laughter. “You’re no fun,” one of them says.

  “Yeah, he’s nothin’ but a party pooper. I should have brought my husband.”

  That kind of talk makes me sick. I turn my back on them and load up a couple of plates with all kinds of sandwiches and other things I think Priscilla and Trudy might like.

  When I get back to the table, Priscilla is sittin’ there rubbing Trudy’s back, while Trudy’s head is facedown on the table. “What happened?” I ask.

  Priscilla shakes her head. “She’s been starving herself to look good for Michael.”

  “Did you tell her she don’t look so good?”

  Priscilla lifts her finger to her lips to get me to shush. “I told her she’s always the prettiest girl around, no matter what.”

  Some man at the table next to us stands up, waving his arms like a crazy person. “Hey, Michael! Over here!”

  I hear Priscilla groan. “Please tell me Michael Baynard hasn’t just entered the room.”

  I glance over my shoulder and squint to read the nametag. As he approaches, and I can make out the letters, I know I can’t tell her that without lyin’. “Sorry.”

  Priscilla doesn’t turn around, but when Michael and the woman he’s with arrive at the table next to us, she gives them a quick glance before looking at me. “This is very uncomfortable.”

  I’ve never been to a class reunion of my own, but I’ve heard all about them from folks on sales calls, and every single one of ’em has moments like this. And I remember one wise piece of advice, so I smile at Priscilla and say, “At least it’ll all be over soon.”

  She laughs. “You make it sound like a root canal.”

  “Ain’t that the truth?” I take her hand, and we give each other one of those private looks that makes me think there might be hope for us yet.

  Trudy chooses that moment to wake up. “Did I just hear someone say Michael’s here?”

  “Um . . .” Priscilla pats Trudy on the back. “Yes, he’s here.”

  “Where?” Trudy’s eyes are at half-mast as she looks around the room. She may be dressed fit to kill, but she looks mighty puny.

  I can tell when she spots her ex-husband. Pure joy covers her face for an instant, but when she sees that girl he’s with
, she looks ready to fly off the handle. Priscilla obviously notices this too, ’cause I see her hand gripping Trudy’s arm.

  “Why are you hurting me?” Trudy asks.

  “Trust me, Trudy,” Priscilla replies. “What I’m doing to you is nothing compared to what you’ll do to yourself if you do what you’re thinking.”

  Trudy gets a burst of energy and yanks her arm away from Priscilla as she stands and points to Michael. I hold my breath, wishing I was anywhere but here, but Priscilla saves the moment by using the element of surprise and shoving Trudy back down into her chair.

  “Stop it, Trudy,” Priscilla says. “Do not make a scene, or everyone will wonder why you were chosen to represent Piney Point in the Miss Mississippi pageant.”

  That seems to work, I think, as Trudy voluntarily settles back in her chair. Priscilla clearly knows what makes this woman tick.

  Michael seems oblivious to anything outside his little circle of admirers. Priscilla had already told me he and Trudy were high school royalty—with Michael ruling sports and Trudy being the beauty queen. He still has whatever the “it” factor was, but unfortunately, Trudy has lost some of hers. Well, actually, most of hers, but we have to make her think she’s still all that.

  “Who is that bimbo he’s with?” Trudy asks.

  Michael’s date—her nametag reads Tiffany—is cute but young. Looks to me like he’s turned into one of those guys who trades in his women for a newer model every few years. As I watch him move around, I can’t see him settling down with just one woman and expecting to grow old with her.

  “Calm down, Trudy,” Priscilla says as she rubs Trudy’s back. “He’s totally not worth it.”

  Trudy sniffles as she looks back and forth between me and Priscilla. “But we were so good together.”

  “Yes, you were, but now you’re single again, and looks to me like you’re better off without him,” Priscilla says. “Instead of living in the past, you need to look ahead and enjoy being on your own. I’m sure there are plenty of guys who’d love to be with you.”

  Trudy shrugs and smiles. Finally. “Yeah, there are. In fact, the guy who loaned me his car—” She suddenly stops and puts her hand to her mouth. “Never mind.”

  Priscilla glances over her shoulder at me before turning back to Trudy. “Michael is all about Michael,” she continues. “You need to find a man who will give you the attention you need.”

  “Ya know, Priscilla,” Trudy says, “you’re pretty good at reading people. I always saw you as an egghead with books, but not all that smart in the social stuff.” She catches herself again and gives Priscilla an apologetic look. “I didn’t mean that how it came out. I’ve always liked you because you were so nice . . . to everyone. And I’ll never forget that you were the first to send me a note when I won the pageant. Most of the other girls were jealous, but not you.”

  “That’s because I was very happy for you, Trudy. I know how much that title meant to you.”

  At that moment, I’m so proud of Priscilla I forget she’s not actually my girlfriend. I need to change that as soon as possible. No way can I let this girl get away. She’s absolutely everything I could possibly want in a woman.

  33

  Priscilla

  I wish Michael would quit flaunting his new girlfriend around our table. Trudy came into the gym unstable, and this might be the very thing that knocks her over.

  When I glance over at Michael, I catch him looking right back at me, and he smiles. I cringe as he threads between the chairs toward us.

  “Trudy, why don’t you and I go to the ladies’ room and freshen up a bit?” I say, hoping to avoid a confrontation.

  She sniffles and nods. “I’m sure I look a mess. Maybe you can help me fix my makeup and hair.”

  I’m about to tell her it won’t take much when she literally drops to the floor. When I turn around to get Tim’s assistance, I see that he’s already sprung to action. He’s standing on his chair, asking if there is a doctor or any other medical person in the room.

  Now that I know help is most likely on the way, I kneel down beside Trudy and brush her hair from her face. Soft moans escape her lips, and her eyelashes flutter as she barely opens her eyes that haven’t quite focused yet.

  “Michael?” she says.

  “No, Trudy, it’s me. Priscilla.”

  “I’m right here, Trudy,” Michael says from behind me. “Are you playing one of your games again?”

  I want to turn around and smack him, but I don’t. Instead, I wave a hand behind me, gesturing for him to go away.

  “A doctor is in the house,” Tim says. “Make room for the doctor.”

  As the crowd parts, I see Didi Holcomb striding toward us. She gets down on the floor on the other side of Trudy and lifts her arm to take a pulse. Trudy tries to pull her arm away, but Didi is stronger.

  “What have you had to eat today?” Didi asks.

  Trudy closes her eyes and shakes her head. “Nothing.”

  “That’s what I thought.” She looks past me at Tim. “Call for an ambulance.” Then she points to the table where we’d been sitting. “Hand me that glass of water. She needs fluids.” After handing her the glass, I reach for a cloth napkin, dip it in my ice water, and dab Trudy’s face with it.

  Trudy manages a shaky grin. “Thank you, Priscilla. That feels good.”

  Within seconds, there are a dozen more glasses of various liquids being thrust in our direction. Now that Didi is here, I stand and direct everyone to give Trudy some space. Celeste speaks up. “Good thing you were with her, Priscilla, instead of someone else.” She cuts her gaze over toward Michael. “Some people would have been more worried about their image than getting help for Trudy.”

  My nerves are shattered, but Didi remains calm until the ambulance arrives. As soon as the paramedics take over, Didi excuses herself and runs out the side door of the gym. I follow right behind her and catch her as she leans against the building.

  “What’s wrong, Didi?” I ask as I slowly approach.

  She shakes her head. “I should have known something like this would happen.”

  “I know,” I agree. “It’s terrible that Trudy would do that to herself. Why do women starve themselves just to look thin for one night?”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about.” Her voice shakes, and she clears her throat.

  “What are you talking about?”

  Didi straightens and looks me in the eye. “You really don’t get it, do you?”

  “I don’t get what?”

  “No matter what I do, how hard I work, or in this case, who I help, you still get all the credit.”

  “Huh?”

  Didi waves her hands around. “I’m the one who checked her pulse and made sure she got liquids, but you were the one who was thanked. It’s like high school all over again. I worked my tail off for four solid years, but you’re the one who edged me out by one-tenth of a percentage point.”

  I frown. “Are you talking about that valedictorian/salutatorian thing?”

  “That’s exactly what I’m talking about. I can never be quite as good as you. Close, maybe, but you always manage to win the prize.” She lifts her hands then lets them fall, slapping the sides of her thighs. “And I can’t for the life of me figure out how this continues to happen. I’m a doctor, for crying out loud, and you’re a . . . a . . . a beautician.”

  This isn’t something I haven’t heard before, so I’m way beyond being offended. “Would it help if I told you that you deserve the credit for helping Trudy?”

  She lifts her eyebrows and regards me for a few seconds before shaking her head. “No, not really . . . at least not coming from you.”

  “Okay, then I won’t say it.” I turn to leave as I think that Didi has really missed her opportunity to get past the bitterness that has obviously been plaguing her for a very long time.

  “Priscilla,” she says in a voice I can barely hear.

  “What?” I ask as I turn back to face her.


  “I liked you better with crooked teeth. They gave you character.”

  My body goes numb. The one person who notices my new smile has turned it against me. When she doesn’t say anything else right away, I start back toward the front of the gym, since the side door automatically locked when it closed. I’m a few feet from the front door when I hear the sound of footsteps coming quickly behind me, so I look to see who it is. Didi is struggling to run in her high heels, but she manages to catch up with me before I open the gym door.

  “Sorry I went off on you like that,” she says. “Sometimes I can’t help myself.”

  “No problem,” I tell her, anger taking over the numbness. “Happens to everyone.” Then I walk inside alone.

  Tim is the first person who approaches me. “Where have you been? I’ve been worried—”

  “You sound just like my mother.” I force myself to laugh as I take his hand. “And I’m flattered that you care so much.”

  “C’mon, let’s go back to our table and try to have a little fun now that Trudy is in good hands.”

  I sigh. I’m not sure I can have any fun at all at this point. One of the paramedics assured us that Trudy would be just fine, but I’m still worried. What will happen next time she starves herself? Trudy and I have never been close, but we’ve known each other most of our lives, and I can’t imagine not seeing her at future class reunions.

  “That girl is a total head case,” Michael says as he approaches our table. “I’m glad everyone got to see this so I won’t seem like such a bad guy.”

  “She starved herself for you,” Tim says. He’s about to say more, but I give him a quick elbow jab to the side, so he clamps his mouth shut.

  “If she hadn’t let herself get so fat in the first place, she wouldn’t have had to starve herself.” He takes a step back and gestures toward his new girlfriend who is standing with a group of people that includes Marlene Vanderford, who arrived while I was outside with Didi. “Get a good look at how a woman is supposed to look.”

  “Are you talking about Tiffany or Marlene?” I ask.

  Michael frowns and looks back over toward the group. “Who is Marlene?”