by Ashlee Price
Flashes of her childhood brought a smile to her face while she walked up and down the street. It wasn’t until she heard the ringing of her phone that she stopped reminiscing. Tanner’s smile… You’re going to be the death of me, she thought to herself.
“Hey,” was all she could muster.
“Hey,” he chuckled, “I was thinking we could grab dinner or something later. I go into work tomorrow, and I picked up some extra days for guys going on vacation, so I won’t be home for a while.”
“Why don’t you grab dinner with your girlfriend?” she said angrily and hung up the phone.
As she expected, he called her right back. “What are you talking about? Please don’t talk to me in riddles, Jenna. I don’t have the patience for this.”
“That’s fine, because you only have to be patient with your girlfriend. That’s not me,” she told him and hung up again.
He called her again. “Stop hanging up the phone! That’s really annoying. Talk to me and stop speaking in circles!”
“Tanner, let me tell you what’s annoying. Sleeping with someone you care about who’s lying to you.”
“What did I lie to you about, Jenna?” he huffed with exhaustion.
“Are you back together with Brandy?” she asked him.
“No!”
“See, you’re lying.” She hung up the phone for the final time. There was no doubt in her mind that she was right, and the next time he called she sent him straight to voicemail. She realized that he’d eventually come to her house if she continued to ignore him, so instead of waiting for that to happen, she jumped in her car and headed into town. She still needed to figure out a theme for her birthday party, and there never was any better distraction than shopping.
However, as Jenna moseyed down the street, her thoughts were everywhere else but on the stores she walked by. Her mind wouldn’t shut off, and there wasn’t really that much to distract her here. She was starting to think her father was right; Doveport was nothing but a huge waste of time. She would be better off leaving, ASAP.
As it turned out, an opportunity to tie up one loose end before she did presented itself as she strolled by a small cafe.
Bold blue eyes beamed with joy and excitement under soft blonde hair as Brandy sat at a table, blissfully unaware of the storm coming her way. She was happy, but her expression changed noticeably once she and Jenna locked eyes. Jenna sashayed through the dining area and sat down at Brandy’s table.
“He’s all yours. I’m out,” Jenna told her with finality.
Brandy sighed and rolled her eyes. “What are you talking about?”
“Tanner!” she snapped, practically shaking the table “I know you guys are back together, and I just wanted to let you know, woman to woman, common courtesy, that you don’t have to worry about me. He’s all yours.”
Brandy laughed and giggled somewhat uncontrollably. “He’s damaged goods, sweetheart. That’s why we worked out so well. The hurt like to hurt, and when they do it together… the results are spectacularly orgasmic. Every other aspect of our relationship was a crapshoot, but that was one area we never had any complaints about.”
“Thanks for the TMI, but Tanner’s not hurt, he’s just hung up on you. Although I guess that could be considered damaged,” Jenna said, more to herself than to Brandy.
“Listen, I hate to rain on your pity party parade here, but I’m expecting someone and they’re not expecting you, so… shoo,” she waved her away with both hands.
“You know, I thought you’d be more appreciative of me telling you that Tanner’s all yours and you can have him, happily ever after, without my interference. But I guess I was wrong. You’re so lucky to be with him, and you treat him like garbage.” Jenna shook her head.
“I don’t have him,” Brandy replied frankly, “and I don’t want him, either. In the grand scheme of things I never really wanted him. And getting a happily ever after is so farfetched it’s not even worth thinking about. Tanner is in love with his job. All he does is work. All he wants to do is work. There’s no relationship when you talk to your phone more than you talk with the person you’re planning a future with. But hey, that must have been just me treating him like garbage. Good luck getting him out of the fire station long enough to hold a wedding. Good luck keeping him home long enough to start a family. So let it go. He let me go, and I’ve said what I had to say to him. We’re on good terms, so there’s no need for the dramatics here. Now as I told you before, I’m expecting someone. Please leave.”
Jenna got up from the table and left the cafe. It seemed like she owed Tanner an apology. From what she knew of Brandy, if she had gotten back with Tanner, she would have been only too happy to gloat about it. It would have been the ultimate ‘I told you so’ kind of moment. But instead of bragging, she’d given her a piece of Tanner she would never have gotten from him. That was what Jenna’s logic told her; but her paranoia got the better of her, and she hung around not too far from the cafe, waiting to see who Brandy was going to eat with.
A tall, skinny guy, with a man bun and a beard she wanted to run her fingers through, appeared minutes after she left. She watched from afar as he headed into the cafe and planted a kiss on Brandy’s lips that was so passionate it made Jenna blush.
Jenna could have kicked herself for jumping to conclusions, and she felt even worse about how she’d treated Tanner. It was time for them to have a reasonable conversation—and for her to start listening.
When she arrived at Tanner’s house, he was just coming outside. He had all of his gear with him and a look on his face that combined surprise and annoyance.
“I’m sorry,” she blurted out.
Tanner swung his heavy duffle bag over his shoulder as he walked to the car with Jenna not too far behind.
“Yeah? About what?” he snarled.
“Not listening to you. If it makes you feel any better, I don’t listen to anyone really. I’m just flying by the seat of my pants here,” she laughed, trying to lighten the mood.
A deep breath escaped his lips as he stared at her. “Jenna, what do you want?”
“I want to apologize and take you to dinner,” she smiled. “I saw Brandy.”
“Are you okay?” he asked suspiciously.
“Yeah, she told me you guys aren’t together.”
“Oh, did she now? I wonder where she’d get a crazy idea like that from.” He rolled his eyes, tossing his bag into the car. “I can’t do dinner. I picked up an extra shift tonight. We can talk later, or not. I’m starting not to care at this point. You’re making this way too hard, Jenna, when we know each other so well.”
“No, we knew each other. Things have changed Tanner!”
“That feeling between us still felt the same. Things happen, Jenna. Life happens every day. But you and me… that love we had, it’s still there for me. Well, at least it was. I’ve got some thinking to do. Maybe you were right. We should have just had some fun. I shouldn’t have tried to pick up right where we left off in high school. I gotta go,” he said, getting into his car.
Jenna stood there as he drove off without saying another word to her. She swore she could feel her heart ripping as his car raced down the street. It was too late. She still didn’t know what she wanted from Tanner, but at this point, she was certain that it was too late for them to even be friends. The only man she’d ever truly loved was pissed, and she wasn’t sure if he’d forgive her.
Giving him a few days to calm down was the best idea she could come up with. Until then, she’d focus on grad school and throwing the biggest birthday/going away party Doveport had ever seen. It was still summertime, and the bar never used that back lot. An idea was cooking, and she was certain she could turn it into a blockbuster event.
Despite what her father said, she could help him one last time and help herself in the process. Resolving at least one of her issues before she left Doveport was something to look forward to. Getting Tanner off her mind was ano
ther. She’d screwed up with just about everyone in her life, but she was going to make it up to all of them.
Chapter 17
Days passed with Jenna only being able to have full conversations with Hannah. Her father was still in a funk, giving her the silent treatment for the most part. His answers were short, and there wasn’t much else between them. Jenna hated it when things were like this. It had only happened one other time, and because her mother hadn’t been ready to kill Tanner alongside him, Paul had put her on ice too. They’d gone on for days like that. She wondered how long her dad would freeze her out for this time.
Tanner had been at work the whole time, and he hadn’t called, hadn’t even sent a text message, nothing to signal her that it was okay to speak to him again. She could just pop up at the station, but the odds of that working in her favor were slim. So she waited.
In the meantime, she’d been all over town looking for another store like Lucky Llana’s, but the only thing she came across were a few generic five-and-dimes and a craft store… none of which had the pizzazz she was searching for. Suddenly, the idea emerged like a phoenix through ashes. Weeks had gone by since the fire. Perhaps the Lucky Llana’s itself was up and running again.
Much to Jenna’s disappointment, the store wasn’t open when she pulled up to it. But then she saw a familiar face coming out of it. She wasn’t too sure, but she called out to the woman anyway as she got out of her car.
“Excuse me! Do you know where Lucky Llana is? I would love to know when the store is opening back up.”
The woman, who’d once sported extravagant black hair resembling that of Albert Einstein, was looking plain at best. She wore a simple blouse and pants, and her hair was straightened into a bob with a slight curl at the bottom. Her eyes had lost the vigor, the excitement that used to glow when she smiled. The air of defeat lingered around her.
“Lucky Llana isn’t here, sweetheart. Llana Samuels, on the other hand, is at your service,” she sighed. It was the saddest introduction Jenna had ever heard.
“So it’s that bad?” she asked her curiously.
“Well, why don’t you come on in and take a look?” she shrugged, heading back toward the door. The huge windows were boarded up, and there were still remnants of broken glass scattered across the pavement. Inside it was dark until she flipped a switch. The stench of smoke and mildew hung in the air. There were boxes everywhere; most of the inventory was apparently packed up.
“So are you moving to a different location?” Jenna asked.
Llana turned to her with tears in her eyes. “No. Just closing up.”
Jenna was ready to bawl along with the woman as she stared around what was left of the eclectic party store. The entire wall that separated it from the shop next door was blackened. There were holes through which she could see what used to be a restaurant. It was even worse off than Lucky Llana’s. Some of the mannequins were melted. There was still a considerable amount of debris. And the stench only got stronger the closer they got toward the dressing room where they’d been trapped.
“How about we go someplace a little bit brighter and let me buy you a cup of coffee or something?” Jenna suggested.
“Oh honey, that’s not necessary.” The woman forced a smile as she patted Jenna on the hand.
“But I would like to. Besides, I think I could use the advice of a wise woman right now.” There was something about Llana that reminded her of her Gram. Gram always told her that no matter how old a person gets, they always want to feel needed. So she walked with Llana over to Mr. Donner’s bakery, where they sat at the little table in the corner by the window.
The old man smiled even brighter when he saw Jenna walk back into the place. “One white hot cocoa coming right up!”
“Thank you, Mr. Donner. And Llana, what would you like?”
“Oh, I already know what she wants, too,” Mr. Donner interjected. “A slice of my blueberry tart with a nice hot cup of Earl Grey tea.”
“You got it, Billy,” she smiled as she sat down.
“I guess I’m not the only regular customer in here, huh?”
“Not in the slightest,” she sighed. “Thank you for this. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like doing anything else. I don’t want to rebuild the shop. I don’t want to fight with the insurance companies anymore. I’m just tired.”
“Why are you fighting with the insurance company? The fire started next door, right? So none of that was your fault. They should just pay for the damages. You can open back up and people like me wouldn’t have to rely on crappy chain stores with no personality for their event necessities.”
Llana smiled. “I’m sure you’ll find exactly what you’re looking for. Besides, it’s not my insurance company that’s the problem. The problem is that stupid restaurant next door that no one ever ate at. The owner wasn’t carrying liability insurance, and he had this strange policy where his own payout went to someone else. His insurance company says they don’t owe me anything, he says he hasn’t got anything, and the beneficiary won’t even talk to me! I could go to court, I guess, but my lawyer says it would take a year or two to get any money.”
“But what about your insurance? Don’t they have to pay you anyway?”
“Oh, they’ll pay me something, but it’s not going to be enough. I have a three-thousand-dollar deductible and they may not even cover all of the damages. They kept saying something about fireproof walls or something like that.”
“Yeah, like the ones I have,” Mr. Donner said as he shuffled over to them. “Behind all these tiles is that fancy cement board and treated beams and whatnot. When I had that renovation a few years back they came in and redid everything because us restaurants, anyone with a stove, we have to have those special materials so what happened to you doesn’t happen. I’m so sorry you’re going through this, Llana.”
“You and me both. I just wish that Mr. Hannity would be a gentleman about this. He got the insurance money, he should cover my costs out of that. But since there’s a suspicion of arson he won’t even talk to me until the investigation’s finished. So I just closed up shop.”
“That’s not fair!” Jenna slammed her hands on the table. She got looks from everyone else in the bakery, but she’d had enough of Mr. Hannity.
“Of course not, dear. It’s insurance. It’s not about being fair. It’s about doing what costs them the least amount of money. But I’m alive, and that’s all that matters. The brick and mortar store is dying anyway. My niece is coming to help me go through everything to see what I can salvage, and after that she’s going to help me set up an online shop. I can tell all of my regular customers to shop there, and maybe I’ll even get some new ones from outside of Doveport.”
“Well, that doesn’t sound too bad. I hope it all works out for you,” Jenna said with sincerity and hope ringing through her voice.
“I hope so too.”
The two women sat there in the bakery talking for a while. Jenna ran through all of her crazy ideas about her party, and eventually Llana helped her narrow them down to one. By the time she left the shop, she was excited to get a hold of Hannah to tell her what she was planning. But she wanted to stop home first.
The sound of Hannity’s name had made her cringe and think of her father. When she pulled her car into the driveway, she saw that his truck was still there, but the garage door was wide open. The trunk where she’d found her mother’s coat was open beside Paul as he sat in a chair with his wife’s belongings splayed across his lap.
“Hey Daddy,” Jenna practically whispered, not wanting to intrude on his moment.
But to her surprise, he looked up and smiled at her. There was a stack of papers and envelopes in his hand. “I can’t believe these are all still in here.”
He handed her a few of the papers. She noticed her mother’s handwriting and looked up quizzically. “I don’t know what any of these are.”
“Of course you don’t. I’d completely f
orgotten about them myself until I came in here. I was moving some of your boxes around so you’d have an easier time packing for your trip. I saw your list,” he sighed.
Jenna chuckled. “You don’t sound excited. Isn’t that what you’ve been screaming at me to do all summer? Pick a school and go? Well, I picked four schools, and I’m going to all of them to check out the campuses and living areas around them.”
“Do I even want to know how you did that?”
“Let’s not fight about money anymore. I picked the best schools offering me the most financial aid in my degree program.”
“Right, so I was looking at your list of schools and I realized that you’d barely unpacked your stuff out here. I was moving it all around when I saw this trunk. Going through it and finding those letters from your mom just made me think about how stubborn I’ve been. I don’t want to fight with you anymore, Jenna. I just want you to listen to me for once, without protest.”
“So, silent treatment over?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Well, I’m talking to you, ain’t I?” he laughed.
Jenna practically squealed as she wrapped her arms around his neck and smothered him with kisses. Mr. Hannity was far from her mind as sat on her dad’s lap, nestled her head against his chest and shoulder, and read the first letter from her mother:
September 6th, 2010
Dearest Jenna-Marie,
I look at you sleeping on the eve of your first day of high school, wondering where my little baby went. We’ve gone from tea parties on the lawn to boy-girl parties after school. I never thought I was ready to be a mother, but having you has pushed me to want to become a great one.
I can’t tell you why exactly I decided to pick this day to start these, but someday the reason will be known to all of us. I love you and wish you nothing but success. Words of wisdom from Gram to me, and now from me to you: Always make sure you wear bicycle shorts under miniskirts, and don’t let Dad see you in miniskirts.