I Do, Maybe: A Novella

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I Do, Maybe: A Novella Page 14

by Jay, Libby

Fraser nodded. “I didn’t sleep a blink last night. All I could think about was…us.” He took a deep breath. “We know how we feel about each other. So let’s go with that. Let’s have a normal relationship. No contracts, no obligations.”

  “You would really do that?”

  “Yes but there would be a pre-nuptial agreement if we were to get married.”

  “I understand.”

  “Other than that, our relationship would be paperwork free. You go to uni as you planned and pursue your dreams. You should do that.”

  I smiled across at him. He smiled back. It sounded perfect. No restrictions, no time limits, no pressure to produce heirs. It was exactly what I wanted. Normality.

  But a thought came to mind. “Where would that leave my mother though?”

  “Nothing will change in regards to my dealings with your mother. That agreement will remain in place.”

  “You’d really do that for me?”

  He nodded his head. “Yes, Emily. I would. I will.”

  I smiled across the table at him. He was willing to do all that for me and yet he claimed he didn’t love me. I did love him though, so I should be willing to meet him half way at least.

  The waiter came back to our table with a large plate of fruit. He placed it down on the table. I looked out to the garden again.

  “What are you thinking Piglet?” Fraser’s voice broke my thought.

  “What I’m thinking is…you should get your lawyers to draw up the new contract. I’ll give you fifteen years of my life and if you want more after that, I’ll happily give those to you as well.” I reached across the table and held his hand. “Promise me something though. Promise me we’ll always be friends, even if all the love and sex stuff doesn’t work out. I’ll be okay knowing that we can still be friends.”

  “Absolutely. We’ll always be friends.”

  “Good.” I smiled. “No more talk of business.” I took a mouthful of coffee. “Let’s enjoy this beautiful day.”

  We went for a nature walk through the mountains after breakfast and then headed back into the city. We quickly stopped in at the apartments to shower and get changed before heading to Darling Harbour where we said our goodbyes to Andrew. We sat in the sun and enjoyed the atmosphere, watching buskers and street performers. After a small lunch we grabbed a hot drink each and sat at the water’s edge.

  Fraser moved in closer and I looked up at him. “Are you having a good time?” he asked me.

  “I am. I’m really enjoying this.” I rested my head against his shoulder.

  He wrapped his arm around me. “Good, I’m having a good time too.” He kissed the top of my head.

  I let go of a sigh. It felt so good to be in his hold. My body tingled at his touch. I couldn’t ignore what I felt for him. My body ached to be closer to him. He knew how I felt, but I wanted to remind him. I couldn’t verbally tell him I loved him but my body language told him.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “Me, I have no self control.”

  “What do you mean?”

  I looked up at him. Our eyes met and we looked into each other’s eyes. “I want to kiss you again. This is the perfect moment for a kiss.”

  Fraser smiled at me. “It is.”

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “You have my heart, Fraser. Please don’t break it.” I opened my eyes and pressed my lips against Fraser’s. He lifted a hand to my cheek and gently held me as we kissed.

  When he pulled away he pressed his forehead to mine. “I’ll never hurt you, I promise.”

  Despite having a wardrobe full of clothes, Fraser insisted I needed a new summer wardrobe. So we spent a few hours in the afternoon shopping. He bought a few new T-shirts and shorts too. I was beginning to think our day was coming to an end when Fraser called Mitchell to collect our shopping bags and take us to another destination.

  I looked down over the harbour from the top of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The sun was setting over the city and it looked amazing. Fraser stood next to me.

  “I’ve had the most amazing day, thank you,” I said, looking up at him.

  “The days not over yet,” he said before he lowered his lips to mine and kissed me.

  Our guide cleared his throat ending our romantic kiss. “We gotta get going,” he said, gesturing for us to follow him.

  Fraser had a special evening planned and he suggested I wear a dress. “Not too formal, but not too casual either,” he said as we rode the lift to my apartment. He dropped me at my door, kissing me quickly before he said he’d be back.

  I was expecting him to be waiting for me when I exited my bedroom forty minutes later but he wasn’t, so I decided to head up to his apartment. I knocked at his apartment door but when he didn’t answer I turned the handle and slowly opened the door.

  “Emily would never do that,” I heard Fraser yell.

  “Women will do and say anything when it comes to money.” I instantly recognised the second voice as Mr. Lewis’ but I’d never heard it used in such hostility.

  “Emily’s different.”

  “And you’re being stupid.”

  I quickly closed the door again and went back down to my apartment to wait.

  Twenty minutes later, Fraser showed up, pen and paper in hand. Mr. Lewis followed him.

  “You need to sign this,” Fraser said holding the paper up to me.

  “Okay,” I said, standing and going to the table. It was a NDA. I quickly read it and signed it.

  “A new contract will be ready for you to sign on Monday night,” Fraser looked at his father. “Happy now.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my apartment.

  Once we were in the lift Fraser let go of my hand. “You need to call your mother. There are photos of us kissing at the harbour all over the gossip sites.”

  “Oh, umm…my bags upstairs. My phone’s…” In our hurry to leave my apartment, I’d left my bag sitting on the dining table.

  Fraser pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to me. I dialled my mother’s number.

  “Mum, it’s me.”

  “Hey honey, how’s your weekend?”

  “We’re having a really nice time.”

  “That’s good honey, are you okay?”

  “Yeah, it’s just that…well Fraser and I are umm…” I looked up at Fraser.

  “We’re officially dating,” he said not looking at me. The elevator door opened and he pulled me out to the basement car park. Mitchell waited to drive us.

  “Yeah, we’re official.”

  “Oh honey, that’s good. You must be happy with that.”

  Fraser opened the car door for me. “Yeah I am. But Mum, umm…” I slid into the car.

  Fraser spoke to me quietly. “You’ll need your ID. I’m going back to get your bag.”

  “It’s on the table,” I said quietly.

  Fraser closed the car door.

  “What was that honey, you spoke away from the phone,” Mum said.

  “I was talking to Fraser. Anyway,” I took a deep breath. “Apparently there are some photos of Fraser and me circulating the gossip sites.”

  “Oh.”

  “Yeah, we’re kissing. I’m sorry. But I thought I should let you know so you can be prepared if someone says anything.”

  “Thanks honey, as long as you’re only kissing and you’re not naked or anything.”

  I laughed. “We’re both fully clothed Mum, we were just kissing.”

  Mitchell chuckled from the front seat.

  “I better go. Fraser and I are on our way out. I’ll call you tomorrow. Love you Mum.”

  “Love you too honey. Have a good night.”

  I ended the call and bought up the search engine on Fraser’s phone. I typed in Celebrity gossip and selected the first Australian based site.

  The first three pictures under the heading of ‘Fraser Lewis’ Latest Beauty’ showed us kissing. There were a few more of us laughing and smiling at each other. The small article mentioned the fact that
Fraser never dated the same girl for too long and gave me an expiry date of January.

  Fraser slid into the seat next to me.

  “Apparently you’re going to dump me in January,” I said, handing him his phone back.

  “Don’t look at those sites, Em. They’ll make you crazy.”

  “I wanted to see the pictures.”

  “After tonight there are probably going to a lot more photos. You have to ignore the media. They can be nasty.” He took my hand. “And whatever you do, don’t be nasty back. Just ignore them.”

  Fraser was tense in the car and didn’t relax until we were seated in the far back corner of the restaurant. He ordered a bottle of wine and leaned across to take my hand.

  “Sorry about earlier,” he apologised.

  “It’s okay,” I smiled back.

  “Dad doesn’t trust anything unless it’s been signed in triplicate.”

  I laughed. “It’s okay, you have to protect yourself. I understand that.”

  “Our publicist saw the pictures and called Dad. He freaked out because we were off schedule.” He cocked an eyebrow. I laughed. “He got on a plane and came to Sydney, all because I kissed the girl I’m going to be marrying in a years’ time.”

  I smiled across the table to Fraser. “Does your dad know about the new contract?” I asked.

  He smiled back. “He does now. But no more talk of business.” He tightened his hold on my hand. “You look beautiful tonight,” he said.

  “Thanks, you don’t scrub up too badly yourself.”

  The waiter poured our wine and left.

  Fraser lifted his glass. “To going off schedule.”

  I returned the toast and took a sip of wine. “Why did I have to sign another NDA?” I dared to ask.

  “You were supposed to sign one on your eighteenth birthday, but considering everything that had happened I put it off. I trusted you not to run to the media with our deepest darkest family secrets.”

  “I could’ve made a mint,” I said, taking another drink of my wine.

  “That you could’ve.” He narrowed his eyes at me.

  I looked down. “I was only joking, I would never do that.”

  He smiled and relaxed his face. “I know. I wasn’t worried.”

  “Then why did you look at me like that?”

  “Like what?”

  “When you narrow your eyes at me, like you’re angry or annoyed or something.”

  Fraser laughed. “I’m not angry at you when I look at you like that.”

  “Then what is it? You do it a lot.”

  He nodded. “Yeah I do.”

  “What does it mean?”

  “It means I’m thinking about whether it would be appropriate to kiss you.”

  My mouth went dry. “What? You’ve been doing it since we first met.”

  “Yep, and it would’ve been really inappropriate to kiss you then, just like it would’ve been inappropriate to kiss you across the table at this nice restaurant.” I felt my cheeks redden. ”I told you I liked you the first day we met.”

  “I thought you meant as friends.”

  “I did, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to kiss you.” He squeezed my hand. “You were so cute that day. The way you sat there quietly, smiling, sipping your drink. And when you realised what was happening; you were so scared. I wanted to hug you and tell you that it’d be okay, that I’d look after you.” He smiled. “When you cried though, you were so beautiful. That’s when I first thought about kissing you. And I thought about kissing you every day after that.”

  I laughed through my smile. “You know, I don’t think it would be inappropriate for you to kiss me across the table, in fact I distinctly remember an etiquette class that specifically focused on the appropriate way to kiss your boyfriend across the dinner table.”

  Fraser laughed loud, attracting the attention of other diners. “Maybe when we get home, you can show me what you learnt.”

  I bit my lip in anticipation. “Maybe I will.”

  After dinner Fraser took me to the Casino. We stood in front of the teller while Fraser pulled out his wallet.

  “How many chips should we get?” he asked me.

  I shrugged, “I don’t know, a hundred dollars.”

  Fraser froze in shock before shaking his head and rolling his eyes. “Five thousand please.” He handed his card to the teller.

  He took his rack of chips and turned to the gaming room. “What game should we play?”

  “I don’t know, I’ve never done this before.”

  “Roulette? I like roulette. It’s easy.”

  “Okay,” I followed Fraser through the room to a roulette table. Two other people were already playing.

  “What number, Piglet?”

  “Oh umm, eighteen,” I shrugged.

  “How much?” He picked up a stack of chips.

  “A hundred?”

  He rolled his eyes again. “We’ll play a thousand.” He put his chips down on the table.

  The dealer dropped the ball onto the wheel and I watched with baited breath as the wheel spun.

  “No more bets,” the dealer called, the ball bouncing a few more times before it settled on a red number. I just couldn’t make out the number.

  “Twenty three red,” the dealer called.

  “Sorry,” I said.

  Fraser shrugged one shoulder. “What number next?”

  “Umm…” I scanned the table.

  “Let’s do our birthdays,” Fraser suggested. He put a stack of chips on four numbers, 4,21,11,28.

  Again I held my breath until the ball settled.

  “Thirty red,” the dealer called.

  I watched as he took Fraser’s chips away.

  “This is fun, right?” Fraser asked.

  “It’d be more fun if we were winning.”

  “You never win, and they don’t like it if you do. Which numbers next?”

  I watched for the next fifteen minutes as the stack of chips slowly disappeared to nothing.

  “Oh well,” Fraser said, “tonight just is not our night. Wanna try cards?”

  “I’ve never played cards, I wouldn’t know…” Fraser gave me a quick kiss. “You’re so cute, come on.”

  After purchasing another tray of chips, we headed to the black jack table. “Watch and learn Piglet,” Fraser said as the dealer put dealt two cards to him.

  All I learnt as I watched was that Fraser was really bad at black jack, and later at poker and craps. After losing sixty thousand dollars in little over an hour, we decided to head to the clubs.

  “Do you wanna dance or have a drink first?” Fraser asked, leaning down to my ear so he didn’t have to yell.

  “Drink, I’m not a good dancer.”

  Fraser laughed and led me to the bar.

  We found a table and chairs near the dance floor and as it was too loud to talk we drank our drinks with no conversation.

  “Come on, let’s dance,” Fraser said, standing up and taking my hand.

  “I’m really bad at dancing,” I said, screwing up my face.

  “I don’t care, just have fun.” He walked to the dance floor, pushed through the crowd until we were just another couple of bodies moving amongst a tide. I watched as Fraser moved, his body not quite moving in time with itself and I instantly relaxed. Fraser couldn’t dance either. I smiled and let my body move to the beat of the music.

  I started to feel hot; I could feel my body starting to sweat. But Fraser was showing no signs of slowing down so I kept moving. I loved seeing him like that. Fun Fraser. Relaxed Fraser. Strictly business Fraser nowhere to be seen.

  I moved and bit closer to him and smiled. “I’m having a really good time,” I said.

  “Huh?” he yelled back.

  I moved closer again, resting my hands on his shoulders and stood up on my toes, closer to his ear.

  “I’m having a really good time,” I repeated.

  He smiled and put his hands on my hips. “I am too.” He kissed me qui
ckly, and keeping his hands on my hips he kept dancing.

  A short while later, a woman stood beside Fraser and kissed his cheek, before wrapping her arms around his neck. Fraser was momentarily confused until he recognised the girl.

  “Hi Frankie,” I heard him say.

  “Hey.” She looked at me, then back to Fraser. “I saw you from our private room.” She pointed upstairs. “Wanna come up?”

  “I’m with Emily,” Fraser said.

  Frankie looked at me. “Emily? The swimming girl?”

  I smiled shyly and nodded.

  Frankie smiled. “That explains it. I was wondering why on earth you’d be dancing with a girl with such a funny shaped body. But she’s a beefy athlete, I get it.” She laughed and I stopped moving. “I guess she could come up too but…” Her judging eyes scanned me head to toe. “She used to be a lot thinner.”

  I took a step back and hung my head.

  “I’m with Emily,” Fraser repeated. He stepped between Frankie and I and walked me from the dance floor.

  Once we were clear of the dance floor I made a beeline for the ladies bathroom. Once inside, I pushed past the lingering girls and went into a cubicle, locking the door behind me.

  “Beefy?” I thought to myself as tears spilled down my cheeks. I looked down at my body. I’d never considered myself beefy, whatever that meant. But it certainly wasn’t a compliment. I was an athlete, I was strong and toned, I knew that. I never considered myself fat, even when I was starving myself, I knew I wasn’t fat, but I convinced myself I needed to be thin.

  Maybe I should…if I lost a few more… My thoughts were interrupted when I heard a familiar voice calling my name.

  “Em?”

  “Hey, this is the ladies room,” a girl shrieked.

  “I don’t care,” Fraser said. “Em, are you in here?”

  I slowly opened the door. When Fraser saw me he took me into his arms and hugged me tight. “I’m so sorry. She’s a complete bitch. Don’t believe a single word she said. You’re gorgeous, she knows that. She was just being a bitch.”

  I didn’t reply, I nodded into his chest.

  He continued to hold me for a few more minutes before he pulled away to look down at me. He wiped my tears with his thumbs. “You’re so beautiful.” He lowered his lips and kissed me.

  A chorus of ohhh’s sounded around us and I laughed.

 

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