Longing for Love

by Marie Force

  “My pleasure,” Grace called over Evan’s shoulder.

  He made a comment about her pleasure that earned him a slap on the back from Grace. “Not in front of your parents,” she said loud enough that everyone on the porch heard her and laughed.

  “Thank goodness we have her to manage him now,” Grant said.

  “And thank goodness we have Stephanie to manage you and Maddie to manage him,” Linda said, gesturing to her firstborn.

  “Hey,” the brothers said in stereo.

  “Hay is for horses,” their mother said. “If only we could find a nice girl to manage Adam, I’d have nothing left to worry about.”

  “Good luck with that project,” Mac said.

  To her husband, Linda said, “Take me home, my love.”

  “With pleasure, babe.” Big Mac followed his son’s lead by picking up his wife and heading for the stairs.

  “Check it out,” Grant said, grinning. “The old man’s still got game.”

  “You know it,” Linda said suggestively to gagging noises from her sons.

  “Disgusting,” Mac said.

  “Totally revolting,” Grant added. “Good thing Janey and Joe already left, or she’d be barfing all over the place hearing that.”

  “We’re out, too,” Luke said, standing with Sydney in his arms.

  “Another man refuses to be outdone by Evan McCarthy,” Grant said as they bade good night to Luke and Syd.

  “Are you going to be outdone by Evan McCarthy?” Stephanie asked, raising a brow in inquiry.

  He patted her bottom. “You’ll have to wait and see.”

  Stephanie loved when he looked at her in that particular way, letting her know she was the most important person in his life. She wasn’t sure, exactly, how he managed to convey so much emotion in a look, but she’d learned not to question their amazing connection.

  “Jenny,” Mac said as he stood to leave, “I’d love to give you a lift off the porch, but I’m afraid my wife, who’s stuck at home with a sick kid, wouldn’t approve.”

  “That’s all right,” Jenny said with a laugh. “I completely understand. If you wouldn’t mind walking me to my car, we’ll call it even.”

  “You got it.” He mussed Grant’s hair on the way by. “See you in the AM, bro.”

  “Thanks again for the help, Jenny,” Stephanie said.

  “It was so much fun. Thanks for asking me.”

  After they left, Shane got up, said good night and went inside.

  “He’s so quiet,” Stephanie said. “You’d never know he was here until he says good night.”

  “He never used to be,” Grant said. “But he’s been through some rough shit.”

  “Haven’t we all?” Dan said with a small smile for Kara.

  “I worry about him,” Grant said of his cousin. “I’d hoped he’d be bouncing back by now, but he just gets more withdrawn all the time. I know Laura worries about him, too.”

  “Give it some time,” Kara said, surprising them all with the comment. “Not everyone bounces back on the same schedule.”

  “That’s very true.” Dan gazed out at the darkened sea with a brooding expression on his face that he quickly shook off. “We ought to call it a night, too.”

  “Don’t even think about trying to outdo Evan,” Kara said in a warning tone that made Grant and Stephanie laugh.

  Grinning, Dan said, “Wouldn’t dream of it.” Instead, he stood and bowed before her, holding out his hand to help her up.

  “Jeez,” she said, rolling her eyes as she took his hand.

  “I like to think I’ve got my own moves, thank you very much,” Dan said.

  “Don’t injure yourself showing them off.”

  Grant howled with laughter. “Oh, I like her. I like her very, very much.”

  “So do I.” Dan shocked Kara when he brought her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “I like her a whole lot.”

  “Best of luck to you, Kara,” Grant said gravely. “You’re going to need it.”

  “I can handle him,” she said. “He’s mostly all talk.”

  Dan’s mouth fell open in surprise, and then his eyes darkened with what might’ve been desire. “Not all talk.”

  “I like her, too,” Stephanie said, intrigued by the sparks flying between them.

  Kara smiled at her. “Thanks for inviting me, and best of luck with the restaurant.”

  “I appreciate that. I need all the luck I can get.”

  “If tonight was any indication, you’re going to be a huge hit,” Dan said, bending to kiss Stephanie’s forehead on the way by.

  In the months since he’d helped to free Charlie from prison, Dan had become a dear friend to her, too, and she’d love to see him happy with a nice girl like Kara. With all he did for others, he deserved nothing less.

  “See you in the morning,” Dan said to Grant as he kept a firm hold on Kara’s hand and led her to the stairs.

  “That’s seven a.m. East Coast time,” Grant called after him. “Not seven a.m. LaLa time.”

  “Yeah, yeah, I got it.”

  When they were alone, Stephanie rested her head on Grant’s shoulder and snuggled in closer to him.

  “Cold?”

  “A little.”

  “Ready to go home?”

  “In a minute.”

  He kissed her forehead and tightened his arms around her. “What’re you thinking about?”

  “I was wondering if you ever miss LA.”

  “Not at all.”

  “Never?”

  “Why in the world would I miss that rat race when I’m here with you and my family, and now one of my best friends has found his way here?”

  “I don’t know. I wondered. That’s all.”

  “Are you afraid I’ll wake up one day and have a sudden longing for my old life?”

  His question struck right at the heart of one of her deepest fears. “Maybe.”

  “Let me put your mind at ease, then.” With his finger on her chin, he turned her face, forcing her to meet his intense gaze. “I’m exactly where I want to be with exactly who I want to be with, and I’ve got no plans to be anywhere else. Ever.” He punctuated his sweet words with an even sweeter kiss. “I love you so much, and I’m so happy to see you finally getting everything you’ve always wanted. I’d never do anything to mess with that.”

  Closing her eyes, she leaned her forehead against his. “I love you, too.” Listening to the ocean pound against the breakwater that formed South Harbor, Stephanie experienced a moment of profound peace unlike anything she’d ever known. Her entire life up to now had been a chaotic disaster. To finally be free of the chains of the past, to be wildly in love with the most amazing man, to have some of the best friends she’d ever had, to be part of a big, funny, wonderful family, to have her own business and to know her stepfather was finally free… She, who’d never allowed herself to want anything, now had everything. Sometimes she feared her heart would simply explode from the overload of emotion.

  “Ready to go home for part two of our celebration?” Grant asked suggestively after an extended period of silence.

  “I suppose,” she said with feigned boredom.

  Not to be outdone by his brother or father, Grant scooped her up.

  As Stephanie smiled at him, another thought occurred to her. “My dad and Sarah never came back!”

  Chapter 19

  “Walk with me,” Charlie said.

  Sarah spun around to discover he’d followed her into the kitchen. “But the kids are waiting—”

  He took her hand. “Walk with me.”

  Sarah reacted instantly to the feel of his work-roughened hand wrapped around hers. It’d been such a long, lonely time since anyone had touched her so tenderly. “The kids—”

  “Will be just fine without us.” Giving her hand a gentle tug, he led her from the kitchen to the hotel’s back door.

  “Where’re we going?” Her heart raced with a mixture of fear and curiosity. Sarah refus
ed to let the fear get the better of her, so she focused on the curiosity.

  “Does it matter?”

  Sarah thought about that for a second. “I guess not.”

  “Relax. I promise you’ll be perfectly safe with me.”

  “Somehow I find that hard to believe,” she said drolly, and then she was instantly concerned that she might’ve offended him. But before she could apologize, he laughed.

  “Am I that scary?”

  “It’s not you.”

  “Well, it can’t be you.”

  “Why do you say that?” Sarah tried to forget that he was still holding her hand as he walked them toward the breakwater. Thankfully, the full moon and the streetlights made it possible to follow the path that wound behind the hotel to the beach.

  “Because you’re one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. You’re gentle and sweet and accommodating.”

  Sarah heard the words but couldn’t bring herself to believe he was talking about her.

  “I wish you could see how you light up when you’re holding baby Holden. It’s a sight to behold.”

  She never would’ve thought gruff, intense Charlie capable of waxing so poetic. “You certainly pay attention.”

  “I had nothing better to do for fourteen years than to observe the people around me. Fascinating, to say the least.”

  “Was it awful all the time?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “I don’t know how anyone can stand prison, but it has to be especially difficult for those who are innocent.”

  “I wouldn’t change anything,” he said in a gruff tone that was more in keeping with what she expected from him than his gentle-poet side. “I don’t like to think about what might’ve become of Stephanie if I hadn’t gotten between her and her mother.”

  “You must love her very much.”

  “I have from the first day I met her. She was a special kid then, and she’s a special kid now. All the years I was inside, she never forgot about me or stopped fighting to get me out. She’s my family. She’s all I’ve got.”

  “And her mother? Do you hear from her at all?”

  “She died a couple of months after the incident that landed me in jail. I don’t think much about her anymore. I had to let go of the bitterness or let it eat me alive.”

  Sarah thought about that as she stepped onto the first of the huge flat-faced stones that made up the breakwater. “Is it safe to be out here at night?”

  “As long as we watch where we step.”

  “Stephanie’s mother,” Sarah said, picking up the conversation after they settled into an easy pace on the rocks, “what was she like?”

  “Very sweet and lovely, when she wasn’t an abusive addict.”

  Sarah had wondered about him for such a long time that it was hard not to pepper him with questions now that he seemed willing to talk.

  “What else do you want to know?”

  She caught a hint of a grin in the pale moonlight. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to pry.”

  He stopped so suddenly that she might’ve run into him if he hadn’t anticipated that possibility and held out his other hand to steady her. “Will you do something for me?” he asked, sounding serious and intent.

  “If I can.”

  “Will you never apologize to me again? Will you never be sorry for asking an honest question or expressing an honest feeling? Will you never worry that I’m suddenly going to become angry with you or become someone different because I don’t like what you said? Can you do that for me?”

  Since he’d rendered her speechless as well as breathless, Sarah only stared at him for the longest time. “I…I don’t know if I can do that. I…I don’t know what it’s like not to be afraid of those things.”

  “Sweet, sweet Sarah,” he whispered as he put his arms lightly around her, asking her without words to let him hold her.

  He didn’t make her feel pressured or overwhelmed or afraid. Rather, he surrounded her with his quiet strength, the scent of his aftershave and the promises he’d made to be nothing like the man who’d harmed her so profoundly.

  She swayed toward him and was proud of herself when she didn’t flinch as his muscles tightened around her.

  “Hold on to me, sweet Sarah.”

  Her hands found his hips in the dark.

  “That’s the way.” They stood there for the longest time as the cool breeze whipped at her hair and flattened her skirt against her legs. They stood there as the foghorn blared and a group of young women laughed their way through town. “Now what else do you want to know about me?”

  Even though the air was chilly, Sarah felt warm from the inside out as his much bigger body formed a shelter from the breeze. “Did you love your wife?”

  “Very much so, until I found out who she really was. Stephanie blames herself for not telling me her mother was an addict. She doesn’t think I know that, but how could I not know she was so afraid I’d leave them that she hid the truth from me?”

  “The poor kid was hanging on to the one person she could count on.”

  He nodded in agreement. “I was happy to be that person for her. When they accused me of abusing her…” Sarah felt the shudder travel through his muscular body. “That was the worst day of my life.”

  “I’m so sorry for all you went through.”

  “Thank you.” His lips brushed against her forehead, setting off a reaction that traveled to all her most important places.

  It’d been so long since Sarah had experienced desire that she was surprised she still recognized it.

  “Are you going to tell me what happened to you?”

  “Maybe someday, but not tonight.”

  “That’s okay. You don’t have to ever tell me if you don’t want to.”

  Knowing he didn’t expect her to spill her secrets was somehow freeing. “Thank you. I’ve had a lovely time.”

  “Me, too. Next time, it’ll be just you and me.”

  As Sarah rested her face against his chest, she decided she couldn’t wait for next time.

  Tiffany waited until she was certain Blaine was asleep before she slipped out of bed and went into the bathroom. With the door closed, she slid down to sit on the floor to process everything she’d overheard.

  He’d lost his last job because of a woman. She desperately wanted to know what had happened, but another part of her didn’t want to know. The idea that she could cause him the same kind of trouble made her feel sick all over again, but this time, she was heartsick. She couldn’t let him risk his career and livelihood, and she certainly didn’t want to wait around for him to figure out that she was more trouble than she was worth.

  Her father had left her. Her husband had left her. Why would Blaine be any different? Sure, he’d said all the right things, but he wasn’t the kind of man who’d discount his mother’s concerns. Eventually, she’d wear him down, and he’d leave, too.

  A sharp pain under her ribs took her breath away. She understood in that moment that losing Blaine would be far more painful than any of the other losses. In the short time they’d spent together, he’d worked his way past her defenses and had given her a glimpse of what might’ve been if things had been different. She hadn’t planned to fall in love with him, she thought as she wiped away tears.

  With hindsight, she should’ve known she would. From that first explosive moment in her kitchen through every other meeting, the signs had been there. At times she felt like she barely knew him. At other times, she felt like she’d never known anyone better.

  It was her own fault, she concluded as the pain in her chest intensified and a sob escaped from her lips. She’d failed to remember that theirs was only a fling and had made the huge mistake of allowing her heart to become involved. Her course of action became crystal clear: She had to leave him before he left her. That was her only choice. As painful as it might be at first, it would be far better to have it happen now before she fell any deeper in love with him. She’d convinced herself, but how would she convi
nce him that their relationship had been doomed before it ever began?

  Right as she had that thought, she heard the heavy thud of footsteps approaching the bathroom door. She couldn’t let him find her crying, so she scrambled for the toilet.

  He knocked softly on the door. “Tiffany? Are you okay?”

  She wiped her face frantically. “Come in.”

  He opened the door and stopped short when he saw her leaning over the toilet. “Were you sick again?”

  “False alarm.” She ventured a glance at him over her shoulder and noticed he’d pulled on a pair of gym shorts. The concern she saw on his face made the ache in her chest worsen.

  Behind her, she heard water running. He handed her a cold washcloth that felt heavenly against her fevered skin. “Thank you.”

  “Can I get you anything?” he asked, studying her intently. No doubt he could tell she’d been crying.

  She shook her head.

  “I know what you need.”

  She watched as he went over to the tub and turned on the water and then came back for her, reaching out to help her up off the floor. He squeezed toothpaste on her brush and kept an arm around her as she brushed her teeth.

  “I don’t have any of that strawberry stuff you love so much, but the hot water will feel good.”

  A bath, she realized, was exactly what she needed. How had he figured that out before she knew it herself? “Thank you.” She waited for him to ask why she’d been crying, but he didn’t.

  When the water was ready, he helped her out of her robe and nightgown and held her hand as she stepped into the steaming bath. He surprised her when he knelt next to the tub and reached for a bottle of shampoo.

  “Get your hair wet.”

  She dipped her hair into the water and waited to see what he would do.

  He massaged the shampoo into her hair and scalp, making her sigh with pleasure. Had anything ever felt so good?

  She kept her eyes closed as he soaped every inch of her skin, except for the area that burned for him. He saved that for last, running soapy fingers over her smooth folds, arousing her with only a few strokes.

  “Blaine…”

  “Sorry. I forgot you’re sick.”

  When he would’ve withdrawn his hand, she grabbed his wrist and kept him there. So much for her resolve to put a halt to things with him. It had taken him five minutes of tender care to show her how lacking in willpower she was where he was concerned.