Diagnosis: Daddy

by Gina Wilkins

  Damn it.

  Opening a textbook at random, he dived headfirst into the pages, needing to immerse himself in science to keep his thoughts from wandering back into the living room with Mia.

  To Mia’s relief, there were no tears during that night. Alexis slept soundly. She blinked her eyes open when Mia roused her gently the next morning.

  “Alexis? Sweetie, it’s time to wake up.”

  Yawning, Alexis pushed herself upright. “’Morning, Mia.”

  “Good morning. I’ll go make breakfast while you get dressed, okay? What would you like? Eggs? Pancakes? Oatmeal with strawberries?”

  “Oatmeal with strawberries, please.”

  “Coming right up.” Tugging teasingly on a strand of Alexis’s sleep-tangled hair, Mia left the child to dress in the plaid jumper and white shirt they’d laid out the night before.

  Already dressed for work in a black-and-brown patterned blouse with brown slacks and comfortable shoes, Mia tied on a bib apron she’d brought with her to protect her clothes while she made the oatmeal and sliced fresh strawberries. She’d started a pot of coffee, too, and the aroma wafted through the kitchen to keep her company while she prepared the meal.

  Connor’s books and papers were still scattered haphazardly on the table. She gathered them into a neat pile, careful not to get anything out of order. She didn’t know how late he’d stayed up studying; he’d looked completely focused on his work when she’d turned in at ten.

  He’d been in an odd mood last night, she mused, stirring the oatmeal. There had been something in his expression when he’d looked at her that she couldn’t quite interpret. She supposed it was as he’d said—they were still getting used to this arrangement. They were all having to make adjustments.

  As if he’d known she was thinking of him, he stumbled into the kitchen then, bleary-eyed and looking as if he’d had very little sleep. Still, he was clean-shaven and neatly dressed in a shirt, tie, dark slacks and the hip-length white coat worn by medical students. He dressed this way only when he would be seeing standardized patients as part of his Introduction to Clinical Medicine, or ICM, course. He’d explained to her that standardized patients were actors hired to portray real patients so the first-year students could learn basic history-taking and exams. He wouldn’t see real patients until his second year of medical school, and then only under very close supervision.

  Watching him head straight for the coffeemaker, she wondered in exasperation why the sight of him dressed like this went straight to her ovaries. In a tie and white coat—or for that matter in his more usual polo shirts and jeans—Connor was definitely one attractive man.

  Shaking her head to clear it of such nonsense, she took a bowl out of a cabinet to fill for Alexis. “Alexis requested oatmeal with sliced strawberries for breakfast. There’s plenty for all of us, if you want some. Do you like oatmeal?”

  “It’s food,” he said with a shrug after taking a long, appreciative gulp of the hot coffee. “I’m not picky.”

  She’d known he wasn’t too choosy about other foods, but there had never been an occasion for her to find out what he liked for breakfast. “Sit down. I’ll bring you a bowl.”

  “I told you, Mia, you don’t have to wait on me.” He sounded almost cross.

  “I’m serving Alexis and myself, anyway,” she replied logically. “It’s no extra trouble to scoop some oatmeal and berries into a bowl for you, too.”

  He didn’t look particularly appeased.

  “You could pour orange juice, if you want,” she suggested. “Alexis and I will both have some.”

  Apparently, that did make him feel more useful. His frown lessened as he filled three juice glasses and set them on the table. Carefully suppressing her amusement, Mia set the oatmeal bowls in place. She had just added a plate of whole-wheat toast when Alexis joined them.

  She was neatly dressed in the uniform with white knee socks and her black shoes, but her dark blond hair was still a mess. She carried a brush in one hand and a red ribbon in the other. “I need some help,” she said to Mia.

  Smiling, Mia took the brush. “Yes, I can see that.”

  A few moments later, Alexis took her place at the table, her hair now gleaming and tied back from her face with the ribbon. “Good morning,” she said to Connor, the slight shyness she always exhibited with him evident in her voice.

  “Good morning, Alexis. You look very nice today.”

  “Thank you.” She picked up her spoon and scooped a strawberry out of her bowl.

  Eating her own breakfast, Mia watched as Connor seemed to struggle for something more to say. “Are you looking forward to starting school today?”

  Her mouth full, Alexis nodded.

  “You aren’t nervous or anything, are you? Because I’m sure you’ll have a great time.”

  Swallowing, Alexis said, “I’m not nervous. I like school. Miss Chen was nice.”

  “And you already have a friend,” he reminded her. “McKinley.”

  “McKenzie,” she corrected him.

  “Oh. Yeah, that was it.”

  Alexis turned back to Mia. “I made my bed the way you showed me. I put Pete on the heart pillow.”

  “That’s the perfect place for him.”

  Her bowl just over half-emptied, the child set down her spoon. “I’m full now. Is it time to leave for school?”

  Mia glanced at her watch. “Go brush your teeth and then it will be time. Don’t forget to bring your backpack.”

  “Okay.” Sliding out of her chair, Alexis turned toward the doorway.

  “Put your dishes in the sink first,” Mia told her quickly.

  “Okay.” Alexis quickly and carefully cleared her place, then dashed out of the room.

  “Making her bed, clearing the table…You’re certainly starting her out right,” Connor commented, still toying with his own breakfast.

  “I figure it’s easier to instill good habits from the beginning rather than to try to break bad ones later. It’s my sister-in-law’s child-raising philosophy, and it’s working out well for her.”

  “You’re lucky to have her as a role model. Because I was an only, I haven’t had any nieces or nephews to observe. Just the older kids I taught at school—and there were plenty of them who could have used some early training.”

  “I know. Another incentive for us to start out right with Alexis.”

  He nodded somberly, his thoughts hidden from her. He sounded as though he approved of her tactics so far, so she didn’t know why he looked so broody. Maybe he had schoolwork on his mind that morning.

  Rising, she carried her own empty dishes to the sink, rinsed them and Alexis’s and set them all in the dishwasher. “We’ll be leaving in a few minutes. Will you be here when we get home this afternoon, or are you meeting your study group?”

  “I’ll probably be in gross anatomy lab until late this evening. My dissection group is meeting there this afternoon.”

  She nodded. “All right. Let me know what you’re doing for dinner so I’ll know whether to hold a plate for you.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”

  Wondering if he was often so serious in the mornings, she left the room to collect her purse and school tote. She and Connor had decided that she would drop Alexis off at her school on her way to work, then pick her up that afternoon. It was little extra trouble for Mia because Alexis’s school was on the way to the one where Mia taught.

  She and Alexis had to go through the kitchen again to reach the two-car carport where she’d parked. Connor was still sitting at the table, finishing another cup of coffee as he looked over some notes before class.

  Mia put a hand gently at the small of Alexis’s back. “Want to give your daddy a goodbye hug?” she suggested.

  Cooperative as always, if not notably enthusiastic, Alexis approached his chair. Connor leaned down to give her a quick hug and brush a kiss against her cheek. “See you later. Have a great first day of school.”

  “Thank you.” She turned immediatel
y to Mia. “I’m ready now.”

  It was still early in the father-daughter relationship, Mia reminded herself as she belted Alexis into the backseat of the car. They would grow closer with time, she was sure.

  She just wished both of them would try a little harder.

  “So?” Natalie leaned a hip against the corner of Mia’s desk during their shared morning prep period later that day, her expression avidly curious. “How did it go?”

  It was the first time they’d seen each other since Mia had moved into Connor’s house. “It went very well. Alexis is an adorable little girl, amazingly well behaved.”

  “Yeah, we’ll see how long that lasts,” Natalie muttered, glancing meaningfully at the rows of empty desks in the classroom. “But that’s not what I meant. How’s it working out living with Connor?”

  Feeling her cheeks warm a bit, Mia shook her head. “You make it sound…well, different than it is. We’re just roommates, Natalie. You know what it’s like to share a house; you told me you had three roommates in college.”

  “Well, yeah, but I wasn’t playing Mommy and Daddy with any of them, either.” Natalie had made no secret of her shock that Mia had volunteered to help Connor with his newfound daughter. She had said flatly that she’d thought Mia had gone too far in being a helpful friend this time.

  “We aren’t playing Mommy and Daddy,” Mia muttered rather defensively. “Single dad and nanny, maybe.”

  “That sounds sort of kinky.”

  “You know what I mean. Did you just come in here to give me a hard time, or were you genuinely interested in hearing about Alexis?”

  Her friend pretended to deliberate a moment before replying, “Both. So tell me all about it.”

  Mia spent the next ten minutes telling Natalie about Alexis’s arrival, about how surprisingly well-adjusted and cooperative the child had been, how excited to start her new school. There had been one moment that morning when she’d seemed to be on the verge of panic when Mia had moved to leave, but fortunately McKenzie had arrived at that moment, greeting Alexis with a gamine grin and a flood of words. Alexis had looked happy again when McKenzie towed her off. Mia was the one who’d lingered a moment, watching her walk away and hoping everything would go well for her.

  “She looked so little,” she admitted to Natalie. “I can see why parents get so anxious letting their kids go off on their own for the first time.”

  “You’re not her parent, you know,” Natalie reminded her, bantering set aside for a moment. “You’re just the babysitter, basically.”

  “I’m certainly aware of that.”

  Natalie gave a little sigh and tucked a strand of dark hair behind her ear, looking uncharacteristically concerned. “I’m just…well, this whole situation seems fraught with potential problems. I hope no one gets hurt before it’s over. Not the kid—or you.”

  A little surprised, Mia gave her friend a reassuring smile. “No one’s going to be hurt. Connor and I have discussed all the possible repercussions and I think we’re prepared to deal with whatever comes up. This really was the best solution for everyone, considering how little time he had to get ready for fatherhood.”

  Still looking skeptical, Natalie murmured, “It certainly seems to be the best solution for Connor. As for you…” She shrugged.

  “I’m fine. Really.”

  “Yeah, okay. So when do you get a night off? Because Donnie has another friend he wants you to meet.”

  Mia groaned. “I think I’ve had enough of Donnie’s friends for now. But maybe you and I can go catch a movie or something in a few weeks. Once everything is settled down at home.”

  “At home, huh?” Pushing herself away from the desk, Natalie moved toward the door. “Gotta get to work. You know where to find me when you need me.”

  When. Not if.

  Wondering when—and why—Natalie had suddenly turned into a pessimist, Mia turned her attention back to the papers spread on the desk in front of her, preparing herself for the students who would descend on her in about fifteen minutes. She told herself not to let Natalie’s doubts get to her. She had everything under control.

  Why should she be worried?

  Chapter Five

  “Mia! Look what I drew. It’s Pete. Doesn’t it look just like him?”

  Mia examined the crayon drawing that bore a slight resemblance to Alexis’s well-loved stuffed cat. “That’s very good, Alexis. I like the flower you drew beside him, too.”

  “It’s a tree.”

  “Of course it is. I must not have been paying enough attention.”

  Alexis nodded, still admiring her drawing. “Cats like trees. They climb up in the branches and then the firemen have to come get them down. Miss Chen read us a story about that.”

  “I’ve read stories about that, too,” Mia said with a smile. “Would you like me to hang this drawing on the refrigerator? I think it would really brighten up the kitchen.”

  Looking pleased, Alexis watched as Mia attached the drawing to the door of the fridge with a thin, square magnet on which was printed the name and phone number of an insurance agent. She would have to remember to pick up some whimsical magnets for this typical home gallery, Mia thought. She doubted that Connor would mind having his daughter’s artwork displayed in his kitchen. “We’ll show this to your daddy when he gets home. I’m sure he’ll like it.”

  “He’s not home much,” Alexis said with a matter-of-fact shrug.

  Mia could hardly dispute that. It was Friday afternoon, and after living in the same house with Connor and Alexis for several days, she had spent more than twice as much time with Alexis as she had with Connor. He always seemed to be with his study group, or in the medical school library, or the gross anatomy lab. She hadn’t even helped him study; he seemed to be turning more to his friends for that since she’d moved in. Maybe he thought she was too busy with Alexis, even though she had several hours free in the evenings after Alexis went to bed.

  “He’s working very hard in school,” she reminded the child. “It isn’t easy studying to be a doctor.”

  Not looking particularly disturbed by his absence, Alexis asked, “Can I watch cartoons now?”

  “May I watch cartoons,” Mia corrected absently before adding, “You may watch for half an hour. Dinner should be ready by then.”

  “Okay.” Snatching Pete up from the table where she’d left him, Alexis dashed out of the kitchen. Since she’d become more comfortable in her new home, she always seemed to be zipping from one place to another. Mia teased her about being part hummingbird, a comparison that always made Alexis laugh.

  Mia was already very fond of Alexis and she knew the feeling was mutual. She was the one the child turned to for her every need. When they went out, Alexis habitually slipped her hand into Mia’s, seemingly reassured to be at her side. She still had to be reminded to give Connor good-night hugs and to tell him things that had happened at school, whereas she frequently and spontaneously hugged Mia and chattered almost endlessly to her about everything under the sun.

  If it bothered Connor that Alexis wasn’t more forthcoming with him, he didn’t let it show. He was kind and patient with her, occasionally teasing her a little, but there was still just the faintest reserve between them. Mia was sure time and familiarity would be the remedy for that, but she could see how it would be difficult for both of them with Connor having so little time to spare.

  She had begun to wonder occasionally if maybe he could have spent a little more time with them than he’d given them so far. But maybe she just had a hard time understanding exactly how stressful his studies were, not having been there herself. She was trying to be patient, to give him plenty of space. Maybe next semester would be a little easier for him.

  Alexis had been in bed for half an hour when he finally came home. She could tell by his expression that he had not had a good day.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked, setting aside the book she’d been reading to stand when he entered the living room.

&nb
sp; He shrugged, his expression glum. “I didn’t do so well on the gross anatomy exam today. Went totally blank on the names of the nerves branching off the femoral nerve.”

  “I’m sorry. That must have been upsetting for you.”

  He pushed a hand through his hair. “You could say that. What makes me so mad is that I can remember them now that the exam is over. Anterior femoral cutaneous branches, nerves to the Sartorius muscle, the rectus femoris muscle, the vastus lateralis muscle, the vastus intermedius muscle, the vastus medialis muscle, the pectineus muscle…Why couldn’t I remember all that when it counted?”

  “I don’t know how you ever remember all of that. Is there anything I can do for you? Maybe I could quiz you later?”

  “Thanks, but it’s too late now. I can’t go back and retake the exam.”

  She supposed she couldn’t blame him for being grumpy. She could empathize with him. She hated feeling as though she hadn’t done her best on anything. She was sure she would be as driven as he was when she started her own graduate studies. “Are you hungry? I can warm some leftovers for you.”

  He started to shake his head, then stopped. “Yeah, I guess I am hungry. I went straight to the library after the exam and never did get around to eating dinner.”

  “I made a pork loin with creamed potatoes and gravy and brussels sprouts. Would you believe Alexis loves brussels sprouts? She calls them little cabbages. Said her grandmother made them quite often.”

  “Never heard of a kid actually liking them,” he said, trailing her into the kitchen.

  “I hope you like them,” she said, taking covered dishes from the refrigerator. “I dressed them with parmesan cheese and slivered almonds.”

  “I like pretty much anything. Except coconut.”

  That was something she’d known already. Connor was one of the least picky eaters she’d ever known. His daughter seemed to have inherited that trait.

  He studied the drawing on the fridge door while she popped a plate into the microwave for him. “Is this supposed to be her stuffed cat?”