Merlicious 2

by Diane Merlin, Alexis Ke, Cara North

  As he neared her, she almost recognized him but could not see his features clearly enough to name him. Frustrated, she tried to force her sea eyes and her memory to put a name to the figure, but to no avail. In her frustration, she woke suddenly, startled out of her dream by her failure to identify the man in her dream of the deep.

  * * * *

  Darkness filled her room, but through her window, she saw a slight paleness that signified the coming dawn. Still wrapped up in her dream sensations, she donned her swimsuit and wheeled her chair out to the water's edge. She knew she had a couple of hours before her mother woke, and she couldn't bear to wait that long. Her whole body tingled with memories of a dream and anticipation of the coming swim.

  She couldn't wheel her chair into the surf, so she lowered her body onto the beach, partly in the wavelets that frolicked at the edge. She pushed across the gritty sand toward the seductive waves until at last she felt the water take her out. She swam hard into the deeper water then headed toward town.

  At Lookout Rock, she pulled herself up at the exact moment the sun broke over the horizon. The whole world seemed dipped in purest gold, even the great rock on which she reclined. The breaking waves splashed liquid gold across her legs as they hung off the rock into the transformed water. Light sparkling on her legs turned the droplets into multi-colored glitter, just as in her dream.

  She remained there, captivated, for many minutes until the sun rose high enough to dissipate the magic. Finally, she knew she must return to the real world, so she began her descent into the water. Still partly embedded in her private niche on the east side of the rock, she became aware of a swimmer headed in her direction. She guessed it must be Andy, headed for a nap on the sand as on the day she first saw him and so pulled back deeper into her crevasse to await his passing.

  To her astonishment, Ray Lockhart swam toward her. She shouldn't have been surprised. Just because she associated him with his boat and fishing, that didn't preclude swimming as a recreation. He spent his whole life on this peninsula, so why wouldn't he love time in as well as on the water?

  She remained in her place until he passed Lookout Rock before she rose up from her hiding place. She looked to the right, past the rock, but didn't see him. Perhaps he had chosen to return home.

  Cautiously, in case he remained near, she lifted her upper body over the crest of her hiding place. He was there, hunched over his knees with his back to her, and he was close enough to touch. Staring out into the deep, he watched a pod of dolphins dance into and out of the waves. They seemed to tempt him to join them in their games.

  He stood up unexpectedly and started to walk to the edge as though he planned to dive in. She made a small instinctive movement or a sound, and Ray turned suddenly to face her. Grateful that her lower body was hidden in the cleft of the rock, she knew he couldn't see all of her.

  "What?” Ray stammered. “What are you doing here?"

  "Swimming,” she replied inanely. Obviously there would be no other way for her to arrive at Lookout Rock, given her restrictions.

  "Yes. What are you doing?” Ray leaned toward her, and she huddled deeper.

  "Please, Ray, I'm not properly dressed. I expected to be alone. Forgive me, but would you mind going around to the other side of the rock until I can get into the water, at least?"

  "Sure. Sorry. I didn't intend to embarrass you, Dolly.” Without so much as a glance in her direction, he dove into the sea and began to swim with strong strokes toward the section of beach where she had first seen Andy. He rose from the surf and sat down on the sand with his back to her.

  "Thanks, Ray,” she called as she dropped into the water. “Come by for coffee after a while. I'm sorry to ruin your contemplation."

  "Thanks, I will."

  Dolly swam as fast as she could toward home. When she reached her chair, her mother stood there, a worried look on her face.

  "I'm sorry, Mom. I didn't mean to upset you."

  Deep lines began to smooth out from the woman's forehead. Her mother pushed the chair toward the house. “I was terrified, Dolly. Whatever possessed you to pull a stunt like that? Taking off before dawn to go swimming?"

  Possessed. Surely, her dream had possessed her. The vision of a world where she swam free, truly at home. Tears threatened, and she blinked them into submission.

  "It started with a dream.” Dolly told her mother the whole story, including the part about the man who swam toward her in the light.

  "Oh, my dear,” her mother said. “I wish I could make a real and wonderful life for you, but there are limits."

  "It's okay, Mom. I know that. No one could have done more for me, so please don't feel badly."

  Ray arrived from the sea side of the house as they sat down to breakfast. Mrs. McDonald set out a place for him, which he accepted with aplomb, as though he took his rightful position.

  "So, what were you doing out there, Dolly? Trying to frighten your mother to death?"

  She didn't know whether to take offense or not. “And who gave you the job as my conscience?” she asked sarcastically

  "I guess I adopted it. You certainly seem to need it if this is anything like your usual activity."

  "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you. It's the only time I've ever done such a thing, and I don't expect to repeat it.” Why did she feel a compulsion to explain to this man she had known for so brief a time? To bicker with him as though he had some kind of right in her life?

  "That's certainly comforting.” Ray stood up, stretched and said, “Well, the fish are waiting for me.” He turned to Mrs. McDonald. “Thanks for breakfast, Mrs. M. I think it's time I took you to lunch in town so you won't think I'm a freeloader. Today? Tomorrow?"

  Her mother replied, “Just me, or is the invitation for both of us?"

  "Both of you, of course. I figured I'd get you here then pick up Dolly at the barn when she finishes sitting. Is today a good day?” His question encompassed both mother and daughter as he looked from one to the other.

  Her mother replied, “Fine with me. How about you, Dolly?"

  "I guess so,” she replied, somewhat bemused at how quickly she forgave his boldness and casual assumption of privilege. “I'll be finished early today, as Andy may only need a few more sketches."

  "We'll be there.” Ray threw a small salute their way and left.

  When she checked the time, she realized she had little of it left before Andy would arrive. While she prepared for the sitting, she mused over her dream. Who was the fish-man in the dream? He seemed so familiar, yet she couldn't capture his face in her conscious memory.

  * * * *

  When Andy arrived, she sat waiting. As before, he swung her up onto the car seat. She gritted her teeth in frustration. She really hated him treating her as though she couldn't do anything for herself. What did these macho men think she did before she met them? Suppressing her aggravation, she thanked him, smiled and settled down.

  "I'm really excited, Dolly. I think we'll finish the pose in a very few minutes, and you'll be free of me."

  His words distressed her. Did that mean he would lose interest in her now that he captured his mermaid? She sneaked a glimpse at him as he drove. His beauty awed her. She found everything about him perfect. His height and breadth. His coloring, deep turquoise eyes set against a sun-browned face, contrasted with the gold of his hair. His lips, artfully formed and mobile, changed shape in delightful ways as he spoke and grinned. The one tooth that grew slightly out of alignment did not distract but added to his attractiveness. It made her think of the man of her dream, though she never really saw his features.

  Dolly shook herself. All this fantasizing and speculation got her nowhere. She didn't even know the dream man existed as someone she actually knew.

  Very soon they arrived at the barn, got set up, and Andy finished his sketches. Satisfaction showed on his face when he completed the final drawing. He laid all of them out on the floor, the only empty space large enough to accommodate them, and walked fr
om one to the other.

  He wheeled Dolly to the beginning of the line of drawings and very slowly pushed her along it, giving her a chance to study the sequential progression. The work thrilled her. It amazed her to see the evolution of a work of art from tentativeness to confidence. She laughed in joy, and Andy laughed with her. He twirled her around and around the room as though they engaged in a waltz, humming The Blue Danube as he went.

  By the time the triumphal dance ended and she wanted to collapse, he pushed her onto the patio and got them a cup of coffee. While she waited for the drink, she heard him grind beans, boil water and drip the brew.

  "Special coffee for a special occasion,” he said as he returned with their cups.

  "Oh,” she gasped, “I had no idea how glorious it was to be involved in the making of a lovely piece of art.” She leaned over and, before she even thought, gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for letting me share this with you."

  Despite her embarrassment at her audacity with the kiss, she couldn't deny she had wanted to do it.

  "Share is not the right word. You are my mermaid. Without you, I'd have nothing to offer my client."

  "Thanks, Andy. Not that I totally believe it, but I do appreciate hearing you say so."

  They sat in companionable silence for a while, looking at the spread-out drawings then Andy got up and gathered them carefully. “Almost time to open the doors to the ‘madding crowds.’ Not that the barn is usually overrun with visitors, but we do have a fair number, all the same."

  He deposited the drawings in a file drawer. They fitted the space perfectly.

  "Now I have something to show my client when he arrives. I can almost feel the stone beneath my hands. Can't wait for the real thing."

  It was an education, taking part in something lovely from its inception to its end. It made her feel she was actually a part of the process. When Andy went to open the gallery to the public, she remained quietly in her chair, her job over for the time being.

  Much sooner than she expected, her mother and Ray arrived to take her to lunch. They invited Andy to join them but, because he had to cover the gallery, he begged off.

  Dolly and her mother had a lot of fun at lunch. Ray kept them laughing and involved with his anecdotes of life as a teacher. He loved what he did and conveyed that to her and her mother.

  She decided not to remain angry at Ray for interfering and trying to direct her life early that morning. After all, she confessed inwardly, she had placed herself in a precarious situation. Any friend worth his salt would have done as he did.

  When they reached home, Dolly needed a nap. Her early morning adventure had pretty well wiped her out. Then the sitting and lunch finally exhausted her. She fell asleep almost as soon as her head touched her pillow.

  She dreamed again. Her mind seemed to split into layers. On one level, she slept deeply and dreamed, and on another, there was awareness that she slept. It seemed that while she couldn't control her mind from within her sleep state, she could recognize what happened.

  Again, she dived into the depths saturated with color and light and shimmer. This time she delighted in her long silvery tail. Now it seemed natural and right. She mingled with the small, gorgeous fish that swam around her that seemed as interested in playing as she was.

  Her favorite, a blue so incandescent that it seemed to light the whole area, turned the water to a bluish glow. She swam in and through the blue light, ducking and twisting this way and that, enraptured by her facility in the water, so distinct from that on land.

  Then, as before, the dream man appeared, and shafts of light once more obscured his features, no matter which way she shifted or turned. Frustrated, she attempted to shoot up like an octopus into his face. As she flew toward him, he shot away just as quickly then picked up speed until he receded beyond her vision and disappeared.

  Dolly woke with tears of irritation pouring down her face. She pulled up to a seated position and wiped her face. Who was he? Did she know him in her waking life?

  * * * *

  Two days later, Andy called and informed her that his client had chosen the pose she had taken on the first sketching day. He invited her to accompany him to the quarry where he would look at stone that might be suitable.

  Delighted, she assented. They left early the next morning for the distant quarry. Andy explained it would involve an all-day outing due to the combined travel and selection time. In the end, Andy rejected every piece of marble the quarry offered. Each piece had fatal flaws, some with nearly hidden cracks in the wrong places, others with large spots of malformed or discolored stone running through the whole piece. He decided to go much farther afield to find what he needed.

  Darkness had begun to fall when they reached her home. Through the lighted dining room window, she could see her mother just finishing dinner. Ray sat with her, and they seemed to be deep in conversation. Dolly watched as Andy began preparations to get her out of the car and into the house, and she saw her mother raise a tissue to her face.

  Was she crying? If so, what could Ray have done or said to cause it? She wanted to rush in and confront him and comfort her mother, but something made her hesitate. Instead, she chose to act as if all were normal. She had no idea at all why she felt she must pretend she saw nothing, but she knew she should.

  Andy lifted her into her chair, and for once Dolly expressed gratitude for his strong arms and willingness to transfer her. She felt almost insubstantial when in his care. She took no pleasure in appearing incapable, while at the same time, she appreciated his strength and ability to move her around with so much ease.

  "Do you want to come in and visit a while?” Dolly invited, though she really wanted to call it a day. Aching and worn out, her legs felt like a ton of dead weight hung below her torso. Besides, if the two men started visiting and talking, they could go on a long time.

  "Another time, I think.” He gazed searchingly into her face. “You look wiped, girl. Um, yes. I definitely think we'll forgo any more socializing for tonight.” He grinned to let her know he kidded around.

  As Dolly reached to open the front door, her mother came to take over.

  "Thank you, Andy. I can handle her from here."

  Dolly resented the way these two spoke of her. She wanted to stand on her own two feet, at least figuratively if not actually. Her will and determination had gotten her this far, able to care for herself and get around even when no one was there to help her. She was certain she could expand her capabilities now that she had more experience.

  "Good night, Andy.” Dolly's voice sounded harsh and ungrateful in her ears.

  Fortunately, he didn't appear to notice. He really had a kind heart and a sweet disposition, she thought. Always cheerful, he never took umbrage at anything she said to him. Nor did he resent her when she got feisty about his hauling her about like a sack of potatoes. She wished she could fall in love with him.

  Very soon after she arrived, Ray left. Dolly did nothing to detain him and neither did her mother. Mrs. McDonald acted as though the scene Dolly witnessed never happened. Dolly wanted to quiz her, but that sense of restraint still held her back, more strongly than before, if possible.

  As he exited the house, Ray leaned down and planted a quick kiss on her mouth. Startled but pleased, she found her lips responding to his. It might have lasted longer, but Ray, evidently very aware of her mother nearby, pulled away and brushed a hand along her cheek in farewell. Dolly expelled her breath as though she had held it a long time. She watched him leave and turned to face her mother. Fortunately, she had left the room, and Dolly surmised she hadn't even noticed the byplay with Ray. As she prepared for bed, Dolly still felt the light touch on her mouth, as though Ray had left a part of him with her.

  There was no dream that night. Nor the next. She remembered Ray's kiss, but time faded the impact somewhat, and she forgot the actual feel of his lips on hers. With her sittings completed, she grew bored. Her life seemed purposeless. She woke, rose, dress
ed, ate and went swimming. Even when being in the water wore her out, it failed to satisfy something the dreams had stimulated in her.

  * * * *

  On the fourth day after her quarry trip with Andy, Dolly completed her usual morning tasks, and then she headed out to swim to Lookout Rock. At least, she consoled herself, if luck was with her she could observe the joyous play of the dolphins beyond the natural breakwater. After her mother left her at water's edge and returned to the house, she set out with unusually strong strokes toward the great rock that so dominated that part of the beach.

  For some reason, today her legs felt like dead logs as she hauled them behind her. Since all their movement came from the hips alone, this happened fairly frequently when she grew tired or tried too hard. If only her posterior parts could metamorphose into the beautiful, flexible appendage of her dreams. Instead, the only movement her lower limbs could supply was that flopping motion that made her think of herself as more like an inchworm than a graceful denizen of the deep. She doubted that her doctor would be able to make her legs work normally but hated to give up hope entirely.

  More tired than usual when she arrived at Lookout Rock, she hauled her exhausted body onto the glistening granite surface of the rock. She tucked her weary length into her private niche and settled in to recover. The great rock felt like a lonely place that morning, but she hoped her former pleasure with it would return. The rock usually worked wonders as a spot of refuge from a confusing world, but now it had been compromised by Ray's visit there.

  She propped her head on her arms where they rested on a smooth shelf that faced straight out to sea, to the place used by the magnificent frolicsome dolphins as their playground. She wondered why they chose that spot, with the whole ocean at their disposal. Some esoteric reason, she guessed.

  She half-dozed on the warming rock as her abused muscles recovered. Her lids felt heavy and began to close. With her lids at half-mast, she watched the dolphins arrive for their daily playtime.