Defining Us: The Calvin & Eric Story (69 Bottles)

by Derrick, Zoey

  I stop as soon as I hear the door beep, click open and then click closed again. I can barely turn around before Calvin is slamming into me, pushing me against the wall. His hand grips my neck and pulls me down, hard and fast. His lips land on mine in a harsh, yet overwhelmingly powerful kiss unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. He wastes no time licking along my lips, forcing me to open for him and his tongue slides in along mine. His other hand grips my belt, undoing it one-handed, stripping me of any self-control I may have had, my cock is instantly hard and throbbing.

  He gets the buckle undone, then goes straight for the button and then my zipper before pulling back. “Jealousy is a shitty fucking wasted emotion,” he growls before releasing my neck. Both of his hands are sliding my shirt up my stomach, my abs come into view and he licks his lips. He keeps pushing my shirt up and I raise my arms as he pulls it off of me. I try and reach for his and he steps back, subtly shaking his head at me.

  “It’s your fucking fault I got jealous,” I bite back at him.

  “No, it’s yours,” he says as he steps up to me. His tongue darts out across my nipple and I groan. “Did it ever occur to you that it was going to be more embarrassing to actually reject her while everyone was watching?” He licks the other nipple and the cool air of the room makes me shiver. “I simply needed her away from the group before I could send her packing with a drink in hand. Then you got all huffy and fucking puffy and out the door you went. I saw you climb into the car and take off.” He licks across my peck and then he slides up higher, toward my neck before he nips at the flesh of my shoulder. “Now rather than playing things cool I had to fucking deal with Dex in my face, scolding me like an errant child and for that, I’m pissed off.”

  “How the fuck was I supposed to know?”

  “You were supposed to trust me.”

  “That’s kind of hard to do when it seems like one minute everything is fucking fabulous and normal and awesome and then the next thing I know, you’re headed toward the bar with some blonde bimbo for a drink. Calvin, you always buy them a drink.”

  “I’ve never rejected a woman’s advances either, until tonight.”

  With that phrase, his lips land hard and fast on mine once again, pressing me harder to the wall, most of his body aligned with mine. I can’t help the thrust of my hips and the moan that escapes when his hand slides along my cock. I shiver when his hand slides past the waist band of my boxers, plunging down and taking firm grip around my rock hard cock. “Fuck,” I breathe out, breaking our kiss.

  I drop to my knees before Eric, sliding his pants down his hips, bringing his boxers with me and his cock slides free. I lick my lips. Possessed by my need to prove myself, I take his cock in my hand, firmly. I stroke upward and watch as his entire body locks down and he moans above me.

  Fueled by anger and frustration over what happened tonight, I am desperate to do this, regardless of the consequences, and I don’t think he’s minding one bit.

  I lick my tongue along the underside of his shaft and he shudders above me. Spurred by his reaction, I wrap my lips around his cock and suck him in. Flicking my tongue, coating his cock, making it easier to slide up and down. I look up at him through hooded eyelids and he’s lost in the feeling of my mouth wrapped around him and it pushes me to keep going. Determined to bring him to the edge, but not over.

  My mouth and hand become one along his length, sucking down while my hand slides up, slowly releasing his cock from my mouth as my hand slides down. Back and forth. Having his cock in my mouth has my blood racing, my heart pounding, desire exploding. I manage to undo the belt on my pants followed by the buttons on my fly. Freeing my cock is easier because I’m desperate for it. To touch it, to have it in my hand while I worship his cock with my hand and mouth.

  “Fuck,” he groans above me. I can’t help the smile that forms on my lips. He’s so turned on and that gives me new desire. His hand slides into my hair, though he has no intention of guiding me, his hand is gentle and it brings me back into focus on my goal. I need him, I have to show him that I want this, that I need this, and if I can’t do that, we will never work.

  The idea of us never working sends a wave of dread through me, this time for loss and nothing more. I release his cock from my mouth. His eyes eventually meet mine, while I stroke both his cock and mine in my hands. “I want you,” I breathe.

  “Take me.” His voice is soft yet determined.

  “No, I mean, I really want you.”

  Despite my hold on his cock, he slides down the wall I pinned him against so that our faces are mere inches apart from each other. “Then take me. Take what you want from me. Have it all, it’s yours.” His voice is filled with a conviction that drives my need for him higher than I could have thought possible.

  I release my cock and grip his neck, pulling him into me for a kiss full of desperation and all the pent up frustration from all the years of denying who I am. His answering kiss is equally as determined. We’re both crossing a precipice that we never could have thought we’d ever reach. A cliff that has taken us years to reach. It all unravels, and it’s all laid out before us, ready for the taking. That door is wide open, he’s waiting for me to step through it.

  I pull back from the kiss. “Strip,” I tell him and his eyes grow wide, but soft as he stands up. His cock is right back where it was moments ago and I can’t resist the urge to lick it. His motions falter as he tries in vain to remove his pants.

  “I can’t if you don’t release me.” His voice is husky, full of lust. I shiver and release him while he sheds his boots and then finally his jeans and socks.

  He takes his cock in his hand and I groan, watching him stroke his cock in time to my own strokes. We’re both tugging and pulling, feeling the desire blossom and grow between us and I know, in this moment, nothing will stop me.

  I can see worry in his eyes. He’s concerned that I’m backing out of this, I’m not, but he needs to see that. He sidesteps me, going for a bag on the dresser and unzipping it. From the bag he pulls out a sleeve of condoms and a bottle. Lube, I’m guessing. The idea of seeing that on the dresser makes me think that he has wanted this all along. The idea is exciting to me in a strange way.

  He says nothing, but turns and walks toward the bathroom, returning with two towels in his hands. He walks toward one of the beds, his bed. Before climbing up, he lays out one of the towels across the bed, then he climbs up on top of it without a word. I watch him closely as he settles on his knees, giving me access to watch as he grabs hold of his cock. “Fuck.” This time I’m the one groaning.

  Watching him on his knees, face down, his hand stroking his cock is…wow. I’m not sure I have the right words. He’s not looking at me and I’m not sure if that is in embarrassment for what he’s doing or if it is to keep me focused on what he’s offering. Either way, I don’t care.

  I get up, straightening, releasing my cock long enough to pull off my t-shirt, kick off my boots and throw my jeans down my legs, stepping out of them as I step toward the dresser. Laying out before me is a bottle of lube and five Trojan’s and I rip one off the strip. Fuck, am I really going to do this? Can I do this?

  Don’t think about it.

  Just do it.

  I give myself a little pep talk before grabbing the lube and turning around.

  He hasn’t moved and his hand has slowed on his cock, no doubt keeping himself on the edge. I shiver as I approach him.

  I feel the bed dip between my legs and I shudder in anticipation. Something has fired off in him tonight and regardless of the end result, I have to give this to him. Regardless of the consequences we will face when it’s over. I shiver, excitement coursing through my veins, outweighing any other emotion I could possibly imagine feeling, like fear.

  I’ve never gone this far with a guy. It doesn’t mean that I haven’t done other things, like toys, fingerings, things like that, but not this. “I’ve never had anyone like this before,” I admit, feeling the need to tell him, hoping to eas
e some of the nerves I feel rolling off of him.

  “Never?” he breathes.

  I release my cock and push myself up so that I can turn and look at him. “No one, not ever.”

  There is a smile playing on his lips. “Good.” He leans down and kisses me. “I’m glad,” he says as he backs away from me, looking down at my body. I watch as he shudders too, his nipple rings bouncing and his nipples hardening. He sets something down, the lube, against my leg and I can see him put the condom between his teeth and rip it open. Something shifts in him. I’m concerned momentarily that something is triggering him, but rather than going south, things start to go north. He’s altered his expression, hardened himself. Steeling himself for what he’s about to do as he pulls the condom from its wrapper.

  I get the urge to roll it on him myself, but I let it slide, for now. I don’t want to push him into having me do something he isn’t ready for.

  Then he freezes completely.

  “Cal?”

  He doesn’t answer. He’s not panicking, he’s just…I don’t know. “Calvin?” I ask him again and finally his eyes meet mine. There is a concerned fear in his eyes. “Talk to me?” I whisper.

  “I…I don’t know how to do this,” he says and I smile in relief.

  “Have sex?” I tease him.

  He snorts. “No, I know how to do that, but…this, I’ve never…”

  I raise an eyebrow at him. “Done anal before?”

  I watch as he turns bright red before shaking his head.

  “It’s no different than…well you know, except, well, it’s a lot tighter.”

  His eyes dart to mine. “How would you know?”

  “Just because I’ve never had anyone up there doesn’t mean I’ve never-” I stop the thought cold in its tracks, not wanting to bring up previous encounters. I turn around, facing him. “Look, if it’s too much, too fast, it’s alright,” I tell him and reach for his hand. He flinches slightly but then comes back to me, his eyes meeting mine.

  “I…I really do want to do this, Eric, I just…”

  “Shhh, it’s alright,” I tell him as I pull the condom from his hand and reach over, throwing it on the nightstand. “Come here,” I tell him and he starts to come back to me, though we’re both still hard and I feel like I’m going to get blue balls. I ignore them in favor of comforting him, helping to bring him back to me. I lay down, holding out my arm, giving him a place to lie and he does.

  For the first time, we’re both still naked and I do everything I can to will my erection away.

  I wrap my arm around his back. “Listen to me,” I tell him, “We have plenty of time for this, it doesn’t have to be tonight, it doesn’t have to be right now.”

  “I know it’s just-” He pauses.

  “Just what?” I ask him.

  “After tonight, today, all the talk about not telling anyone, Addison approaching me, then Dex, I just, I felt like I needed to prove to you that I really do want this.”

  I huff. “By having sex with me?” He nods. “Ah, Cal, no, no, no, not like this. You don’t owe me anything, Calvin. I’m aware of what it is that you want.”

  “Then why did you leave?”

  I sigh, “Because my gut reaction was to find some guy in the bar and make you jealous. Then I realized that while you may not have been able to help yourself with her, I could certainly help myself with some other person. Believe it or not, Cal, I understand what’s going on in your head. Yes, I was jealous, but I was jealous for all the wrong reasons.”

  “What were those?” he asks the logical follow up.

  I put my hand on top of his. “Because she had your attention.”

  He looks up at me and counters, “But she didn’t.”

  I smile slightly. “I know that now, but I didn’t at the time. I let my idea of how things should be between us get in the way of us being us. Being who we are.”

  “I think we need to tell them,” he tells me with a serious look in his eyes.

  “I think they already know,” I retort. “But I think you’re right. I think we do. I thought, this morning, that we could just fall back into a ‘normal for us’ routine around our friends, but it is obvious that we can’t. I think we just need to let them know that we’re working on it, that there may be times where things go smoothly and other times where they might not so much.”

  “Like in public?”

  I nod. “I’m pretty sure they already have us pegged as something more than what we were before the break, but it would probably be better if we confirmed it for them. As far as everything else, well, we deal and tell them if we need to, but I don’t think we will. I think any one of them would understand that while they may have had that instant connection, you and I are not so lucky.”

  “But we have that connection.”

  I smile wide at him. “Yes we do, but they don’t need to know that,” I tell him.

  “Okay,” he tells me softly before snuggling back into his special spot against me.

  CLIMBING back on board the bus wasn’t exactly as exciting as we’d expected it to be, at least not for me. Being back on board means going back on the road and it means that Eric and I are forced to sleep apart. Talon, Kyle and Addison all have the master bedroom at the back of the bus. The room was Talon’s before, well, before this whole tour began. The other ‘room’ is now occupied by Dex and Raine, leaving Eric and I in our racks toward the front of the bus. Tori has moved over to the other bus with the rest of the security detail, but we still have to sleep with one on top. Leaving one rack open for the occasion where one of the bodyguards gets stuck on board. Which happens frequently.

  At least now I can climb all the way up top instead of falling into my bed on the bottom. It also means that I get to sleep on top of Eric. I shake my head in silent laughter as for some reason I find that funny.

  We have a show in a couple hours, but we’re all working on moving back in beforehand so that we can take off after we’re done in the greenroom. Somewhere along the way there was a unanimous vote of driving on to Seattle right away, giving us a couple extra days to roam around before we play our set. Then it’s Portland and finally back to close out the tour in Los Angeles.

  Five more shows…then what?

  The idea brings me up short. Yeah, the band isn’t going anywhere and we have a new album to record, but, fuck. I try and think about what I did before this tour started and well, I’m coming up empty because right now, all I can think about is Eric and where are we going to go when we’re not forced back together like this.

  The idea sends a bit of fear through me. What if once this is over, he’s done? What if I’m just a bored infatuation? I shake my head. I’m an idiot for even thinking that.

  Suddenly the hair on the back of my neck stands up and goosebumps fly over my skin and I know why almost immediately. Eric is on the bus and I smile as I throw my bag up on my bunk. “You’re gonna sleep on top of me?” he whispers in my ear and I shiver as his breath flows around me.

  “I’ve been sleeping on top of you for two nights now,” I breathe back.

  “True.” I can feel, rather than hear his chuckle. “It’s not the same though.”

  I sigh. “No, it most definitely is not, but it’s either this or…well, nothing actually. I don’t see Talon giving up his room, there are three of them after all, and Dex, yeah, you can argue with him for that one.”

  “We could just squeeze into one,” he teases.

  I snort. “Yeah, right. I may not be that big, but I am bigger than either one of those two girls and while Dex and Raine could get away with it, I highly doubt we will.”

  “Worth a shot,” he says with a smirk.

  It wasn’t but a couple minutes after our exchange that Dex and Raine came on board and we shot the shit for a few minutes before Talon, Kyle and Addison came on board too. Once we were all kind of settled, Raine and Addison set about making food. Though I know Talon won’t eat, it didn’t stop the rest of us from diving in before o
ur set.

  When it was time to take the stage, we all proceed through our traditional kissing of Addison, though Dex now kisses Raine instead. That tradition started with our first show in San Diego and ironically enough, it started because of Dex. He was so hell bent on getting a piece of Addison that nothing was going to stand in his way. I think it helped that nothing had developed yet between Addison and the guys, because otherwise we’d have never been able to keep it up after that.

  The set went amazingly well. Eric and I seemed just that much more in tune with each other and we started feeding off the energy of the other, making it one of our most animated shows so far. Maybe the break did actually help reinvigorate us. Either that or it’s Eric, or the fact that our grueling tour finally has light at the end of its tunnel.

  The greenroom goes about as normal, though tonight is far fuller than last night was. I think it might have to do with the other show being a late add-on. It’s late when we finally climb on board the bus. Talon, Kyle and Addison disappear quickly. It’s going to be a loud night by the way Talon is kissing and loving on Addison. I start to wonder if it’s in the air tonight because Dex and Raine aren’t much different than Talon was. I roll my eyes.

  Eric is a little feisty when he climbs on board, but he knows, at least until we hear them doing their thing, that we’re not entirely in the clear of being caught doing anything. He climbs into the shower, desperate to get the sweat and all that crap out of his hair before crawling into bed.

  The hot water slides down my body. God, that feels good. I am so sore tonight. Almost as bad as I was after Vegas when we’d just gotten this party started. I forget how intense these shows can be. Add to that the fact that I haven’t had any fucking release in…I roll my eyes and sigh, too long.

  That’s when a noise outside the shower draws my attention and I look through water covered eyes to see Calvin standing there, naked. My breathing hitches in my throat as I wipe away the water from my eyes in order to see him better.