Shrouded in Blackness

by Karlsson, Norma Jeanne

  Quinn told me last night she wants to be with me. I really thought we were headed back to each other, but I can’t be in a dating pool. I can be soft with Quinn, and I will be. I will not share her, though. I’m Kieran Delaney, not some pussy yuppie willing to hang around and collect scraps. She’s mine. She’s been mine since February. Being a good man is a fucking struggle!

  I go back to building Lego towers and enjoying my children. They’re still my focus in life. I won’t fuck this part up, no matter how strong the urge.

  We actually have a perfect day together. Grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup for lunch was a hit with Jack. We worked hard trying to encourage Ashling to crawl, which ended in her laughing and rolling around instead. Jack and I worked on his wrestling while Ashling took her afternoon nap.

  My son is a natural on the ground. I know Quinn will hate it, but the kid’s a fighter. He’s quick and thoughtful as he moves and takes direction without question. The smile he gets when he completes a maneuver or breaks out of a hold fills me with pride as a father. I never knew feelings like this existed. Now I can’t imagine life without it.

  I was successful with lunch, but dinner was a bit more of a struggle. Jack wanted roasted chicken and vegetables which apparently his mother makes him on the weekends. I informed him if I tried to roast a chicken and vegetables, we’d have to eat a burnt dinner. He laughed at me and we settled on hamburgers and hotdogs on the grill.

  Quinn pulls up in the SUV (alone, thank fuck) as I’m loading a plate with our manly dinner. Jack bounds off the deck into her arms almost taking her to the ground. The slight boy that she found in February is nowhere to be seen. He’s gained a lot of weight and has grown at least a couple inches. She absorbs the hit and wraps her arms around him with a glowing smile on her face.

  At least she’s not wearing that skin-tight dress. Now that I know she’s not with Mike, I have a shit ton of questions about who she was dressing like that for. I would know if she was dating someone seriously, right? Someone in my crew or in my family would have the decency to pass that information along. I haven’t pried into her life while she’s been at my parents. If I wanted information on her it would take all of one, maybe two, phone calls. She wanted to be free of me though, so I’ve let it go. I’m a tough motherfucker to have accomplished that.

  “Have a good day?” I ask politely.

  “I did,” she says through a huge smile. “How were things here?”

  She sets Jack in a chair at the outdoor table before making him a plate. Who knew a white tank top, jean shorts and some white canvas sneakers could be a turn on? I find myself mindlessly ogling her ass as she leans over the table to grab…something, I’m not paying attention. She clears her throat, pulling me from my reverie.

  “I asked if Ash ate yet,” she prompts with a raised brow.

  “Nope,” I respond, popping my p like I wasn’t just perving all over her perfect ass.

  “I’ll feed her while you two eat, then.”

  “You’re not hungry?”

  I take the seat next to Jack and shove a giant mouthful of burger into my face, grinning at Jack with a mess on my lips.

  “I ate while I was out,” she coos in her baby talk voice, spooning a mouthful of green shit into Ash’s mouth.

  I grunt in response. So she went out and at least shared a meal with another man today. I really want to ask if he enjoyed her as a meal, but I won’t. It’s tickling my lips, though.

  “What do you wanna do tonight, Baby?” she asks as we’re all finishing up.

  “Daddy said we could have a movie night!” he exclaims. This kid loves movies like no other. We’ve been catching him up on all the movies he missed while he lived in the streets. That’s a lot of movies.

  “I didn’t know what time you’d be back,” I offer in a small apology in case she’s offended I’ve made plans with Jack for the night.

  “What movie are we watchin’ tonight?” she asks Jack, ignoring my response completely.

  “Girls Gone Wild,” he deadpans.

  I spit out my beer as Quinn pales. Jack bursts into laughter at his own joke, not knowing why it’s funny.

  “You got all the food wet, Daddy,” he says through his giggles.

  “You made me,” I feign blame at him.

  “That was funny. Can we watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?”

  “Sure, bud. Why don’t you go play for a bit while I get dinner cleaned up?”

  “’Kay.”

  He climbs out of his chair and races inside, slamming the door shut behind him. At least he got it shut.

  “Sorry I made plans with him. I thought you might be out late again,” I apologize as I pick up our dirty plates.

  “Again?” Quinn asks confused.

  “The last time you were on a date you came home pretty late.” I shrug.

  “I’m not dating Owen. You really think I’d date one of your friends?” Her tone is skirting toward pissed and now I feel like a dick. I couldn’t tell she was with Owen.

  “I just saw a dude in your car and assumed it was a date. I didn’t know you were out with Owen.”

  “You must think I’m a real bitch,” she scoffs, standing up to get Ash out of her highchair.

  “No, I don’t think you’re a bitch. I think I fucked things up with us a long time ago and you have the right to date someone else if that’s what you want. I know you’re not with Mike, but you were out for a date the night you left with him. What else am I supposed to think?”

  “I didn’t know you thought I was with Mike until I got home that night. I should have set you straight, but I didn’t think it mattered. I did go on a double date that night with Mike and Sofia.”

  “Are you still seein’ him?” I ask with pain in my voice.

  “No. I told you, I wanna be with you. That’s what I want,” she says emphatically and still a little pissed off. I figure I’ll push my luck because I’m an idiot.

  “Did you sleep with him?”

  “Fuck you, Kieran. I went on one date! I’m not a whore!” Now she’s raging. The only reason she isn’t screaming is because Ashling is on her hip.

  “I didn’t say you were a whore.”

  “You didn’t have to. I don’t wanna spend the evening fighting with you so let’s get this outta the way.”

  “What?”

  “You obviously need to ask me some questions, so go ahead,” she barks.

  I don’t really have anymore. She didn’t fuck anyone else and she’s single. I’m good.

  “I’m good,” I say with a cocky grin.

  “Did you sleep with anyone? Are you still single? Are there thongs hidden in the couches that you need to rid the house of?”

  I drop the plates with a clang and stalk over to her. I grab Ashling off her hip and take her inside. I put her in her ExerSaucer and turn on the baby monitor. I can see her from the deck so she’s safe in the kitchen alone for a few minutes.

  I shut the door to find Quinn cleaning up dinner in an exasperated state.

  “I haven’t touched anyone but you since February. I can’t even think about touchin’ anyone but you. I’ve fuckin’ tried. I don’t know how to do this, Quinn. I wanna wrap you in my arms and hold you against my chest until you can’t stand another second. I want you in my house, in my bed and by my side every minute of every day. I’m in love with you. That hasn’t changed. It’s killed me to leave you alone.”

  “Good,” she seethes. “You think this has been easy on me? It’s been goddamn torture! I’ve never been with anyone besides you. Sean was nothing compared to you. I can’t even make the comparison. What you did to me that day crushed me, scared me, hurt me and made me think I was stupid to fall in love with a man like you. I knew what you were when we started this and I accepted you for every part of you. Then you face fucked me and treated to me like a whore afterward. How could I love someone that would do that to me? What does that make me? What does it make me that I still wanna be with you?”

&nbs
p; I step as close to her as I can get without touching her. She cuts her icy eyes at me with tears brimming.

  “I was a monster that day. I’ve been a monster for thirty-five years. I’ll be one until the day I die, but I will never be a monster to you again. I’ve learned my lesson. I’ve paid the price of losing my family for months. I’ve had to watch you blossom into an amazingly independent woman from afar. I’ve had to listen to your laughter from behind closed doors. I’ve had to miss Ashling learning to roll and sit up for the first time. I missed Jack reading his first book on his own. I can do nothing to get those moments back. I’ll do everything in my power to make certain I never miss another moment in your life or the kids’. I love you and if you still want me that makes you a fuckin’ saint. I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve how good you make me feel. But please don’t think badly of yourself for wantin’ to be with me. I can’t stand the idea that you’re doin’ somethin’ you hate because you can’t fight against it.”

  “See, there you go,” she pokes at my chest as tears roll down her cheeks, “sayin’ the right thing, makin’ me feel better when I really just wanna be mad. I don’t hate that I wanna be with you—it scares me. I can’t be that woman that signs up for a life of hurt because the good times feel better than anything I’ve ever felt.”

  “I fuckin’ promise I’ll never hurt you like that again. I’ll make you mad. I’ll make you stabby. I’ll annoy the shit out of you. But I’ll never hurt you again,” I finish emphatically, knowing I’m dead serious.

  “You can’t scare the kids again, either,” she whispers.

  “I swear I won’t.”

  She studies me for a long time, her wet eyes dancing around my face.

  “I love you. I want to be with you. This is your last chance to make me yours, Kieran Delaney. I won’t come back again.”

  “I love you, too,” I purr through a small grin.

  “Kiss me.”

  She barely gets the words out of her mouth before I smash mine against hers. I grab her under her arms and hoist her up so I can have better access. Quinn wraps her tiny arms and legs around my body as I support her weight with my hands on her glorious ass. I work my lips in conjunction with hers savoring the flavor, sweet and minty. I move my tongue across the seam of her lips and she opens them quickly, slanting her head. I lap, lick, flick and massage against her until I’m struggling for air. I don’t stop. I can hear Ash cooing and happy inside so I keep going.

  As our tongues tangle, Quinn moans and rubs her hips against my torso trying to relieve the building pressure. I want inside her like I want my next breath. It’s taking every shred of human power I have not to slam her against the house and fuck her into oblivion. I keep my hands on her ass, not kneading her cheeks like I want. I continue to drink from her mouth, not moving down her jaw and neck like I want. I make no move to take this beyond the kiss she requested. It’s frustrating her.

  She takes my bottom lip between her teeth, biting down hard, trying to spur me on. I pull hers into my teeth, gently nibbling before plunging my tongue back into her mouth. Quinn lets out a frustrated growl and yanks my hair with vicious force, bruising our lips together. I remain steadfast and maintain the kiss. She rips her mouth away from me.

  “Kieran,” she chides.

  “Yeah?”

  “I don’t like this,” she growls.

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper and go to set her back on her feet. It was too much, too fast. Shit!

  “No,” she barks, wrapping herself around me tighter. “I don’t want you holding back with me. Thank you for givin’ me the power, but please take the lead. I miss you leading me this way. I’ve craved it.”

  “The last time I led, things didn’t go so well,” I say quietly in shame.

  “Will you ever do that to me again when we’re havin’ sex or otherwise?”

  “Never.”

  “Then please be yourself with me. I need you. I need this to be real with you. I don’t want a different Kieran. I want the man I fell in love with, not some pussy who’s afraid to touch me without permission.”

  And I’m being called a pussy again. That’s all it takes.

  “I am what I eat. And your pussy’s for dessert,” I purr in her ear before biting the lobe then caressing it with my tongue.

  “Yes,” she groans.

  I drag my teeth along her jaw and then down her neck as goosebumps cover her ivory skin. My dick is so hard it burns with painful pulsing pressure.

  “I want inside you,” I groan against her skin.

  “Yes,” she purrs.

  “All night.”

  “Yes.”

  “Until you can’t fuckin’ walk.”

  “Yes.”

  “Mommy!” Jack yells in the house, breaking our moment.

  I kiss her lips long and hard before placing her on the deck. Her face is flushed bright red, her lips are swollen and her eyes look drugged with lust. Never a hotter sight in the world. Quinn moves around me with a small seductive smile playing on her mouth before heading inside to deal with our children. I’ll wait until tonight, then all bets are off. She’ll be mine in every way I can get her before the sun comes up.

  Kieran

  I spent a normal, happy, loving evening with my family and I’m on cloud nine. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was a massive hit with Jack. Quinn and I sat next to each other holding hands like a new couple. She’s letting me again. Letting me love her, care for her, be my all for her and she’s loving it. I wish I could be the sweet, loving, romantic guy that would light candles and whisper sweet shit in her ear before I take her, but I’m not.

  I climb into bed naked with her after laying Ashling down and checking that Jack is out cold, which, of course, he is. I strip Quinn out of her clothes in record time before launching my attack.

  I kiss her with all the passion in my soul until she rips her mouth from mine to nibble my neck and ear. I return the favor, fighting the urge to give her the biggest hickey known to man. Instead, I work my mouth down the valley between her perky tits, salivating at the chance to devour them.

  I wrap my lips around one raspberry nipple and firmly pinch the other. Quinn’s back comes off the mattress as her hands drive into my hair, smashing my face into her supple flesh. I suck on her nipples so hard I’m shocked she’s not screaming in pain. I pop it free from my mouth and switch tits, offering this one the same aggressive suction as the other. She rocks her hips against my chest spurring me on.

  I want to kiss and lick my way down to her pussy, but I’ve lost my self-restraint. I scoot down the bed on my knees before grabbing her hips off the bed. Forcing her legs to remain together I lift her up to my face and drag my tongue from her ass to her clit, long eager strokes. Quinn wraps her arms behind her knees, holding them to her chest, encouraging our position for my feast. I continue to stroke her with my tongue until every drop of juice is gone before planting her hips back on the bed.

  I pull her knees from her chest and smash them on either side of her body. Quinn grabs behind her legs opening herself even further for me. I spear my tongue inside her with force as she moans and says words that resemble English. Moving up to her clit with my tongue I insert one finger and pound away. I suck her clit and add a second finger, curving them upward. She comes whispering my name, shaking from head to toe violently. I’m drenched with her come and I keep going.

  I finger her and lick her clit until my tongue cramps and my fingers are pruney. She’s had three more orgasms and is limp and sated as I crawl up her body. Quinn licks my lips clean before ramming her tongue down my throat with a guttural moan. I palm my dick and feed it into her tight pussy slowly. Her breath hitches as I move into her, but she never stops kissing me. Once I’m so deep in her I’ve bottomed out, I growl in caveman satisfaction.

  I begin to move slowly in and out as her walls clench around me. That lasts about four strokes before I begin to pound into her, dropping my face to the crook of her neck. Quinn wraps her legs around
my waist as an orgasm crashes through her. She scores my back with her nails and I relish the burn of her marking me. Running my arm beneath her lower back I tip her up just a little so I can move deeper within her. She cries out in another orgasm almost immediately, her pussy crushing my cock.

  I slam into her as I come, filling her so much that it flows out around my dick, slathering my balls. I slow my strokes, bringing us down while kissing her lovingly and soft. Once we’ve both caught our breath, I leave my cock in her like the first time we were together and collapse on top of her.

  “That was…” she trails off.

  “I know,” I mumble into her neck.

  We lay joined together caressing each other’s skin, kissing and playing for a long while.

  “Tryin’ to get me pregnant again?” she asks teasingly.

  “Yes,” I grunt.

  “We just got back together.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “Think that’s a good way to start stuff off?”

  “Yup,” I say popping my p. “Givin’ myself a late birthday present.”

  “I thought I was pregnant in June,” she whispers.

  I push up on my elbows and peer into her flawless face.

  “I was relieved at first when the test came back negative. Then I was sad. I cried in your parents’ bathroom for a half hour lookin’ at the damn test.”

  “I’m so fuckin’ sorry, Quinn. I don’t ever want you cryin’ in a bathroom alone again. I can’t believe…you were sad?” I ask, a little shocked. I figured she’d be relieved like she said she was, not sad.

  “I want all the things you said you wanted before. I want more babies with you. I wanna grow old with you. I wanna be by your side in life. When I realized we weren’t together anymore I was hopin’ I’d at least get a piece of both of us to remember what we had,” she whispers, tears threatening to spill.

  “I’ll never be able to take back that time, but I still want all of those things with you. More so now than before. I’ll have sex with you every minute of every day if it means givin’ you what you want. It’ll be a tough sacrifice, but I’m up for the challenge.”