Gage
Dad actually gave me the rest of the week off so Lyra and I could celebrate her homecoming. So what did I do? I told her I had to work so I could get the hell out of there. What I wanted to do was throw her on the bed and take back what was mine. So she could remember what it felt like to have me inside of her instead of some fucking stranger. God, when I think of his hands all over her I want to exhume what’s left of his body, just so I can kill him all over again.
After the explosion, I had promised myself I wouldn’t read one single article that pertained to Jonathan Day. Unfortunately, it lasted all of about two seconds. I had to see what the mofo looked like. Big mistake. Now I have a visual that’s constantly playing on repeat in my head of the two of them all tangled together. It’s not pretty. Especially now that I know she was a willing partner. Fuck! I need to get the hell over this really fast or it’s going to eat away at me. Until it kills me.
My first impression of Jonathan Day was he looked like a sick fuck. With his scraggly beard and long hair he reminded me of Charles Manson. Now that I think of it, even his eyes were maniacal. Black and lifeless. How the hell am I supposed to erase all of this from my brain?
And now that I’ve seen her journals, I desperately want to read them. Does that sound fucked up? Yes. Yes, it does. But I can’t help it. I need to get inside of her head, so I can feel everything she was feeling. Was she frightened? Did she feel hopeless? Abandoned? Vulnerable? It’s the not knowing that’s fucking killing me.
One of my worst case scenarios portrays Jonathan Day as Lyra’s Master, and Lyra as his submissive. Throw in some bondage, spanking and discipline. No ... I won’t allow myself to go there, because it will drive me fucking insane!
I haven’t been totally honest with Lyra. But in my defense, it’s a surprise. I’m positive that once she finds out what I’ve been up to, she won’t be angry. I’m picking up her best friend Kennedy at the airport tomorrow. When Lyra insisted on coming home early, Kennedy said London could wait. It will still be there whenever she decides to go back. She was quick to remind me that Lyra was her number one priority. I know she thinks I’m sugarcoating the fact that Lyra’s fine. But Kennedy insisted she had to see her with her own two eyes. Whatever. It’s all good.
To get my mind off of Lyra, I decide to stop by work. Maybe it’ll be good for me to get my head out of my ass and concentrate on something other than Lyra and Jonathan bumping uglies.
I gently tap on my dad’s office door before going to mine. “Hey, what the hell are you doing here?” ejects from his mouth when I peek inside. He motions for me to enter.
“Lyra needed some space. So I decided to come by and finish off the Merritt project.”
“It’s not due for another month, Gage. Talk to me.” I’d like nothing more than to get all of this shit off of my chest, but I’ve never aired out my dirty laundry to my dad. And I’m not about to start now.
I know he’s in for the long haul when he leans forward and places his elbows on the desk. Waiting. Suddenly, my tongue engages before my brain has a chance to shut it down. “Lyra told me the truth about what happened at the cabin. And I’m having a really hard time accepting it.”
The man doesn’t even flinch. It’s as if he were waiting for me to confirm what he already knew. Damn, he’s good. “Did you want her to lie, Gage? To spare your feelings.”
Well, shit. How the hell do I answer that without sounding like a dick? “No. We’ve never lied to one another and I don’t want her to start now.” I can’t help but blow out an exasperated breath before continuing. “I guess I just wasn’t expecting her to be so straightforward about it.”
“You’ll have to be a little more specific if you want me to understand.”
I’m uncomfortable discussing this with my father. And he can clearly see that by the way my hand massages the back of my neck. I’m desperately trying to relieve some of the nervous tension that’s in full swing. The last thing I want to do is portray Lyra as lascivious. “I appreciate you wanting to help, but I can’t discuss this with you. It’s something Lyra and I need to work out on our own.”
“I understand, son. Just know that I’m here for you if you need to talk. Do me a favor?”
I’m so glad he’s not pressing me further. “Sure, Dad. Anything.” When he stands, so do I. And I’m taken by surprise when he pulls me in for a hug.
“Go home, Gage. I know for certain that Lyra doesn’t need space. You just took it upon yourself to leave before you’d say something you’d regret. Unfortunately, you’re a lot like me in that respect. And you can’t work out your problems if you’re here with your old man. Go. Don’t waste another precious minute.”
“You’re right, Dad. Thanks. I’ll call you in a few.” I pull him in for another hug and then turn back the way I came to spend some quality time with Lyra.
By the time I pull into the driveway, I’ve gone over everything I want to say to her at least a thousand times. Okay, I might be exaggerating. But the moment I open the front door and see her red-rimmed eyes all I can manage is a, “Hey.”
My heart aches when fresh tears begin to fall. In two long strides, I have her in my arms. And when she whispers, “Hey,” I nuzzle into her as she falls apart. Again.
Chapter Twenty
Lyra
Clearly, I thought Gage and I had taken a few steps forward last night. Until he woke up at the crack of dawn and disappeared. No note. No explanation, just gone. I tried texting him several times, but he hasn’t texted me back yet. Now, I’m getting pissed. The least he could have done was let me know where he was going and what time he’d be home. Several hours go by and I still don’t know where he went.
I’m sitting at the island, sipping my third cup of coffee when the front door opens. Cody cocks her head and begins growling. Wow, I know she’s not too fond of Gage but this is crazy. “It’s only Gage, silly girl. Hush.” My eyes are emitting imaginary daggers by the time he steps through the doorway. He looks guilty as hell when his eyes land on mine. I knew it!
“I hope you’re not angry with me, Lyra, because it would ruin the awesome surprise I have for you. That’s why I had to leave so early this morning. I had to pick it up. Do you want to see it?”
“Where have you been, Gage? You promised me last night that we’d spend some time together and you go pull a stupid stunt like this. And you didn’t leave a note.” I’m so wired from all the caffeine, that when I push back my chair to stand up, it hits the floor. But I stop dead in my tracks when I see a beautiful woman with long dark hair push past Gage. No, it can’t be. She’s supposed to be in London, not here in my kitchen.
“If you thought for one minute I’d choose all those sexy Englishmen over you, then you’re cray-cray.”
“Kennedy…”
“Were you hoping for the Queen of England? You know she would have been here but she had a previous engagement. Disappointed?” she asks.
“Not at all. She’s a bit too proper and straitlaced for my taste.” Kennedy closes the distance between us and when she pulls me in for a hug, I break.
“You scared the shit out of me, Lyra Rose Harper. Don’t ever do that again.” You know someone’s your bestie when they’re not worried about you ruining their best Dolce and Gabbana dress.
Once I’ve stopped blubbering like a two-year-old, I ask, “How long are you staying?”
“For as long as you need me, girlfriend.” Aww. And that’s why she’s my best friend. Although, a few months ago, I would have told her to go back to England and have some fun. Now, not so much. I guess being held captive in a secluded mountain cabin has its drawbacks. Yeah, and I hadn’t realized how much I missed everyone until I came home.
“Let’s get you settled into the guest room and then we’ll swap stories,” I say. “Wanna make a bet who’s going to win?”
If Kennedy answered my question, I didn’t hear her. All of my attention is focused on Gage. Who’s sitting on the couch petting Cody? Hells bells. H
e’s actually placating the dog so Kennedy and I can have some alone time. This is one of the many reasons why I love this man. He is selfless, considerate and forgiving. Everything I am not. “He’s a keeper, Lyra. Go give him a great big hug for picking up your BFF at the airport.”
When he sees Kennedy whispering in my ear, he swipes his hands down the front of his jeans before standing. He’s nervous and it’s all my fault. After everything I’ve done, I have no right whatsoever to be angry at him. I’m the one who has to fight like hell to gain his trust, not the other way around.
All of his anxiety and tension seem to dissipate the moment I wrap my arms around him. “You knew how important it was for Kennedy to be here and you made it happen. Thank you, Gage. You’re too good for me and I don’t deserve you.”
I get all choked up when he leans down and kisses the corner of my mouth. Somehow it feels more intimate than the real deal. “Hey, stop beating yourself up. All I want is for you to be happy, Lyra. That’s all any of us want. The rest is up to you, babe.”
He’s absolutely right. I am responsible for my own happiness. Me, myself and I. So, taking a deep breath I get lost in his beautiful brown eyes. As a million butterflies come to life in the pit of my stomach. Reminding me of the first time I let these three words tumble from my lips. “I love you with all of my heart, Gage. I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving…” His lips come crashing down on mine, swallowing all of my promises. I’m holding onto him for dear life when his tongue slips between my lips on a breathy moan. Oh God. I’d forgotten what it was like to get lost in him.
“Oh for God sake’s, get a room! I told you to thank him, not molest him. Geez, Louise.”
I laugh when Gage’s lips turn into a full-fledged smile. My best friend has no filter. None. She tells you like it is, whether you want to hear it or not. Do not. I repeat, do not ask for her opinion, if you don’t want to hear the unbridled truth. “Gage, I feel terrible. We were supposed to hang out for the rest of the week.”
“Don’t worry about it, Lyra. We have the rest of our lives to play catch up. Unfortunately, Kennedy will be gone before you know it. Go have some fun, babe.”
He steals one quick kiss before striding out the door. Leaving me alone and exposed with the only person I can’t hide from.
“Did I ever tell you that boy reminds me of Theo James? You know, that hottie from The Hunger Games.”
Seriously, she cracks me up. Every single time. “Yes, you have. And every time you’ve mentioned it, Theo’s in a different movie. He’s in the Divergent series, Kennedy. Remember that for next time.”
“Potato, potato. Same difference. Boy meets girl, they go through a ton of shit and then they fall madly in love. End of story. Now, come sit down over here and tell me all about your real life horror show.”
I thought one of the hardest things I’d have to handle after leaving the safe house would be confronting my parents. Surely, my mother of all people would be able to see right through my disguise. Astonishingly, she didn’t. As a journalist, she assumed it was suitable behavior for someone who had been kidnapped. Supposedly, I was a better actress than I’d given myself credit for. But now that Kennedy and I are alone, I wonder, am I strong enough to keep up my façade?
Kennedy
I’ve been sitting here for the last hour listening to every word that spews from her mouth. I call bullshit on ninety-five percent of it. It sounds rehearsed. Staged. Like someone trained her to tell it like it is. What the fuck! I’m her best friend. Why is she not being honest with me? She might have been able to fool Gage, but I’m not buying it. And unlike him, I will call her out on her shit.
Once she’s finished her clever tale, I stand up and applaud. Instantly, her mouth gapes. “Bravo, Lyra. You did a wonderful job of retelling their version of the story. Whoever they are. Now, I want you to tell me what really happened.”
“What the hell! I just cut myself wide open and all you can do is clap.” Lyra pushes off the couch so fast, she stumbles and I quickly steady her before she falls flat on her face.
“Dammit, Lyra. It’s me. Kennedy. You can lie to everyone who loves you because they wear blinders where you’re concerned. But I don’t.” When she storms off into the kitchen, I follow. I’m not backing down this time because I know if I do, she’ll be lost to me forever. The friend I know and love will cease to exist. And I will never let that happen. “Lyra, please…” she spins around when I reach out to touch her arm and she screams. Startling me. Cody rushes into the room and bares her teeth. Immediately, she places herself between Lyra and me. Holy shit! She thinks I’m hurting her.
Lyra drops to her knees and embraces the dog. “Shh. I’m fine, Cody. She won’t hurt me. Not physically, anyway.” Ouch. I watch her stroke and scratch the dog’s thick fur, until Cody’s no longer panting and agitated. Then with a flick of her wrist she commands, “Go,” and the dog disappears. Wow. I’m sure she’d like to be able to dismiss me that easily right about now.
Several awkward minutes tick by while I try to find the right words. And when her eyes finally meet mine, they’re glistening with tears. “Lyra, I…” She shakes her head as the tears begin falling. “I loved him, Kennedy. I was in love with my abductor. How fucked up is that?” I watch her eyes suddenly widen in horror as her attention shifts to something behind me. His spicy cologne gives him away. Gage.
Shit, shit, shit!
Before I have a chance to turn around, the door slams. And Lyra’s nothing but a blur as she runs by me. I, on the other hand, fall into the closest chair I can find. I should have stayed in London where I belonged and let the two of them work out their own problems. But when Gage had called, he sounded so distraught I thought I could fix it. Fix her. What a joke. I’m a joke. Hence the reason I’ve never been in a real relationship. All I seem to be good at are one-night stands. Hook-ups. And a lot of lonely nights.
I have no idea what’s going on out there, but I’m making myself invisible. I think I’ve done more than enough already. Grabbing a bottle of wine, I opt out of using a glass. By the sound of it, I could be in here for a very, very long time. In fact, I just might have to sleep here. Hmm, now that’s a scary thought.
Two hours and a bottle of wine later, Lyra strolls through the door. Her red-rimmed eyes are a telltale sign that things didn’t go quite as I had hoped. Dammit! This is all my fault. When she plops down in the chair across from me, I grab her hands. “Hey, how about we change into our PJ’s and watch Orange is the New Black? We’ll order a pizza, open a bottle of wine—since I finished this one—and we’ll have some girl time. What say you, sound good?”
“He left me, Kennedy. I tried so hard to make him understand what he overheard. But he can’t wrap his head around the fact that I love them both. Hell, neither can I. Now all I want to do is crawl into my bed, pull the covers over my head and forget.”
“Lyra, Gage loves you. Once he’s sorted it all out, he’ll come home. Come on, you need some girl time and I’m just the one to give it to you.”
Chapter Twenty-One
May
Lyra
Lately, I find myself breaking down the calendar into little increments. Instead of years, months, and days, I break it into days, hours, and minutes. For example, it’s been thirty-six days since Ryker set me free. Two weeks since Gage left. Forty-two hours since I drove Kennedy to the airport. And seventy-seven minutes since I found a new job. Crazy right? Well, it seems to be the only way I can process everything that’s transpired so far. Especially since it feels like I’ve lived a lifetime in just a few short months. So much has happened, yet nothing has been resolved. Ryker’s still alive but nowhere to be found. Gage hasn’t bothered to move back home. And Kennedy—my BFF—is now back in London, wreaking havoc on all the Brits.
God, Save the Queen.
The minute I step inside my apartment and kick off my shoes, I grab my phone. I think about texting my mom to let her know about my new job, but sometimes a girl just needs
to hear the sound of her mother’s voice. It’s comforting.
I flop down in the closest chair and listen to the call going through. My heart sinks when it goes directly to voicemail. Shit! I desperately wanted to talk to her. I don’t waste my time leaving a message, I just toss my phone on the couch.
After tucking my legs underneath me, I close my eyes. Resting my head against the back of the chair. It’s so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. Immediately, my eyes pop wide open and my heart quickens. Cody! She’s normally here to greet me the second I open the door. Bolting out of the chair, I race from room to room. “Cody. Cody! Where are you?” Silence. Goose bumps break out along my skin once I’ve checked each and every room. This is so stupid! She’s smart, but I know she can’t open doors. Panic suddenly washes over me. Did I leave the back door open this morning? I’m frozen in place, the minute I look out the back deck. Gage is sitting on the beach, while Cody chases the waves. His dark, wavy hair is tousled from the salty ocean breeze, causing my heart to skip a beat. Is he home to stay?
Taking a deep breath, I slide open the door and step outside. Cody sees me instantly and races towards me. She’s cold, wet, and loaded with sand when I squat down to give her some loving. You might think I was gone for a week instead of hours. Now that’s unconditional love. Wouldn’t it be a wonderful world if people could love without expecting anything in return? Unfortunately, we’re a selfish bunch and we always want what we can’t have. Sad but true. Fortunately, our pets are the only ones who can forgive us despite our flaws.
I glance up just in time to see Gage moving towards me with intent. Leaving dread to roll around in the pit of my stomach. His unwavering gaze is locked on mine as he ambles his way through the damp sand. When I stand up, Cody’s attention suddenly focuses on a flock of seagulls. I’m all but forgotten as she chases them down the beach. Leaving me all alone with nothing but Gage’s intense stare. I shield my eyes against the bright sun until he is standing directly in front of me. Then his height and broad shoulders swallow the sun, allowing me to admire his handsome face. I have missed him. With a fierceness that I never knew existed. As soon as his palm brushes my cheek, I melt into his touch.
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