Paradox Alley s-3

by John Dechancie

  "Such language," Arthur complained.

  Dave suddenly developed a grave expression. "Excuse me," he said quietly. He left the room.

  Carl waited a moment, then picked up the communicator. "Arthur, you asshole!" he whispered hoarsely. "Now he's all pissed off."

  "All these neurotic humans I have to put up with," Arthur grumbled.

  Dave returned five minutes later bearing a,tray on which were a number of tall bottles. His face looked a bit gray. "I don't know about you guys, but I need a drink. Beer's all I have."

  We all took a bottle. Dave sat, took a long swallow; and ruminated. He took another drink before he said, "I've just had a shock. I'll tell you about it in a minute, but first, let me tell you the reasons for my believing your fantastic story strictly on the basis of what you've told me, and what I've seen. I buy it not because it makes one whit of sense, which it doesn't, not because it's believable, which it isn't, but because of a few little things. I'm a writer. I'm plagued with the penchant for noticing things-little things. Tiny touches of convincing detail. Like your accent, Jake."

  "My accent?" Strange to hear someone say I had one.

  "Yeah. It's American, generally. But I can't place it, and I specialize in regional dialects. I do great dialogue, my producers tell me. But I can't place yours. Yours either, Lori. Now, Darla's is totally different from both of yours. If I had to put a tag on it, I'd say it was Mid-Atlantic. Neither British nor American. But there're traces of other accents in there. A melange. I can't figure it."

  "Better to call it mid-colonial," Darla said.

  "Yeah. I guess so." Dave gulped more beer. "Accents. Okay, now clothes. Those getups you're all wearing. Those clothes weren't made anywhere in the civilized world. I don't know that for sure, but the style… I mean; it's a style I've never seen. And they're nondescript clothes, nothing flashy about them, except that jacket of yours, Jake. But it's worn and tattered. The elbows are wearing through. That jacket's been worn; for Christ's sake: Again, there're only two possibilities. Either that's a studio wardrobe throwaway, or it's a real jacket, worn by a real person, who happens to be from another time and place." Dave drained the bottle, took another from the tray, and applied a tool to its top. The metal cap popped off. "And you, Carl. I noticed it right off the bat. There's something different about you, even besides the haircut and those futuristic overalls you have on. You look different. Like you've traveled, grown. You look older. You are older, according to your story. About a year, right?"

  Carl nodded.

  "Sure. So it all fits, it all hangs together on that level, the level of convincing detail. On the rational level, the whole thing holds about as much water as a colander. But I have to believe it. That communicator thing could be a souped-up transistor radio or something, but even so, it's one weird object. I wouldn't have accepted the story on that basis alone, but… it, plus the little things, the fine touches-add it all up, and… I've stepped into a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity, the middle ground between light and shadow, et cetera. Cue Rod. Action." Dave exhaled slowly, taking off his glasses and rubbing his left eye. Then he swept back his longish dark hair. "But there's one more thing. The clincher-a piece of irrefutable evidence. The shocker. When I was in the kitchen, I made a phone call. I called you, Carl. I talked to you. You were home, at your parents' house."

  Carl seemed to collapse inside. He lowered his head and stared at the floor.

  "Okay," Dave said. "So, what do we do? How can I help?"

  Dave's rented house was small, having only two bedrooms, but he was willing to give up both of them and sleep on the couch. When I protested, he said he usually collapsed there anyway after working into the wee hours. There was only one bed, which Carl and Lori insisted that Darla and I have; they made do with layers of blankets and pillows piled on the floor in the spare bedroom. We were set for a prolonged stay. Ordinarily, Dave said, he didn't suffer house guests for more than three nights, but he was willing to put us up, and put up with us, for as long as was required.

  "However long it takes to resolve the spatiotemporal crisis," he told us, "you're welcome to stay. What, I'm going to throw out time travelers from the twenty-fifth century?"

  "Twenty-second," I corrected him.

  "Right, that was Buck Rogers."

  Trouble was, our presence would undoubtedly disrupt his work routine. He wrote for a living, and he needed to put in a full day's work every day, including weekends. It behooved us, then, to find something to do during daylight hours, which would entail going out, which would necessitate our getting some acceptably conventional clothes. Dave came through for us again. He lent us money, enough to buy something decent for all of us at a discount clothing outlet. I told Dave that I could pay him back in gold. Carl insisted that he'd make good on the loan.

  Once we'd solved the costume problem, we cast about for something to keep us occupied. Going to the local beach was out. Carl's double would be there.

  "I was a beach bum, I admit it," he said. "But I know what beaches I used to hang out at. I never went to Malibu. Didn't like the kids who hung out there. Bel Air types with Corvettes and Lotus Fords and Porsches. We can go there, and my double wouldn't show up in a million eons."

  Earth… summer… 1964…

  It was a bright and colorful and happy time, a flux of seaspray and sunlight and rock music tinny and loud from a portable radio. The images come quickly to me, along with the sounds and smells: the reek of gasoline exhaust and suntan lotion and hot dogs sizzling on the grill at the concession stand; the endless beach carpeted with seminude bodies baking in nonionizing radiation, and the roar of the ocean, rolling in and out as it has done on this planet, this home of humankind, for five billion years. Darla and I stretched out on towels beside the bright surf and let Earth's sun warm on our backs. We dozed, and the flux convolved about us. We were lost in time and didn't particularly want to be found.

  … summer, 1964. It was a time of blaring news reports over the radio and TV… the Russians, Viet Nam, Laos, Cambodia. An election year, the Republicans nominating somebody named Goldwater, whom I had never heard of, to run against the incumbent, Johnson, whom I had barely heard of. (Hadn't there been another President Johnson, in the earlier part of the century? Or had it been another century entirely?) It was a time when the world had fallen under the spell of four young men from Britain with domed haircuts who played their electrified instruments enthusiastically, if not well, singing songs with a steady beat and charmingly simple lyrics…

  We had some time to bask in the sun and absorb some of the backdrop of this time and place, but we had some thinking to do as well; rather, I had it to do. At night we sat around with Dave and talked, filling him in on more details concerning our adventures in the world of the future and the worlds of the Skyway, including our journey outside the known mazes — the Outworlds: Splash, Talltree, the planets of the Nogon — the chase through the Garage Planet of the Roadbugs, the wonders of Microcosmos, and other tales.

  "This Culmination business," Dave said, sitting with us on lawn chairs out on a little porch off one side of the house. "Mind-boggling. From what you told me, this… thing will come into being approximately ten billion years in the future. Yet, you're dealing with it now. And you're dealing with it on a planet that you say exists back at the beginning of the universe, ten billion years ago."

  "Near the beginning, anyway," I said. "Within a few billion years of the Big Bang, or whatever happened back then. Yes, that's the way it was explained to us. The Culmination transcends time. Once it was created, it became eternal." I took a sip of my gin and tonic. "There's a possible scientific explanation for it. If we think of it strictly on a physical plane, maybe the Culmination is nothing but an instantaneous communications device, one that makes possible the transmission of information faster than the speed of light."

  "Relativity," Dave said, nodding. "I've read a dozen books about it written for the layman. The way I understand it, if you se
nd a message that's faster than light, you send it back through time."

  "Yeah," I said. "If there was an instantaneous communications device operating at a point in the far future of the universe, and if it were powerful enough, it would broadcast throughout time, and any capable receiver existing in the past would be able to pick it up."

  "I think I understand," Dave said, "but something as grandiose as the Culmination… I mean, it's hard to think of it as nothing more than a souped-up radio."

  "Right, but that may be the only handy way to think of it. Otherwise, the concept gets mystical and slippery."

  "Well, seems, to me it's got to get mystically slippery at some point. It sounds like what they did was create God."

  "Or some approximation of Him… or it."

  Dave whistled softly. "Mind-numbing. Way out. There're no words for it." He took a long drink of beer, looked thoughtful for a moment, then said, "I still can't grasp why the Culmination built the Skyway."

  "From what we can guess, it exists as a means to bring potential candidates to a central place for processing into the Culmination," Darla said.

  "I understand," Dave said, "but why do they need candidates? Why do they need minds for the Culmination?"

  "That's what we don't know," I said. "We've some clues, but nothing like an answer. And we don't know exactly what joining the Culmination entails. Do you get zapped into a computer? Get transmuted into pure energy? Or what?"

  "Maybe you just die," Dave suggested.

  I chewed over the current paradox situation. Something had to be done, and soon. I talked it over with Arthur. "Arthur, do you know any reason why Prime would abduct Carl and set him loose on the Skyway?"

  "No. The notion is totally ridiculous. Prime would never do such a thing."

  "Why not?"

  "Why not?" Arthur laughed derisively. "Why in the name of all that's holy in the universe would he?"

  "I dunno. You tell me."

  "Well, I can't. It makes absolutely no sense that Prime would travel ten billion light-years to a jerkwater planet and kidnap a human being-not a very bright one, at that-give him that bizarre vehicle, and set him off on the Skyway to cause all sorts of trouble. You think of Prime as a god, don't you?"

  "A demigod, maybe."

  "Demigod, shmemigod. Okay. The gods-or the demigods, if you will-may be inscrutable, but they sure aren't stupid! I mean, they don't go around doing idiotic things just to pass the time."

  "Then who abducted Carl?"

  "I think you know the answer."

  I did. However, I had a hell of a time convincing Carl. "Carl, let me explain it one more time…."

  Carl covered his head with a beach towel, turned over on his stomach, and shoved his face into the sand. "I'm going bananas," he said in a muffled voice.

  "It's crazy, but that's the only way it works."

  "I'm going to have myself committed. None of this is real."

  "It probably isn't. Look, your double-the you of a year ago-is down there in Santa Monica living the life of a typical teenager of his era. In a few weeks, he's going to be abducted by a flying saucer and taken one hundred and fifty years into the future and set loose in a strange world. That happened to you. Now it has to happen to him, on the same day in history that it actually happened. Prime isn't going to be around to do the deed. We have the ship, the only one of its kind in existence: Do you understand it now?"

  Carl turned over again and unraveled the towel. He lay back, blinked sand from his eyes, and covered them with his arm.

  For a minute, we listened to the Beatles sing of love and its loss.

  "I understand," Carl said finally. "I think. It doesn't make sense, but I understand it. I'm getting used to things not making sense."

  "Good," I said, "because they rarely do."

  "There's only one thing."

  "What?"

  "I've been thinking about this for a while. If things are so screwed up, so backward and impossible, then it must be true that Lori is Debbie."

  I nodded. "Again, it doesn't make sense, but…"

  "Yeah. Besides, it works out better that way. If Debbie is another person, then I got some explaining to do."

  I asked, "When did you finally convince yourself that she isn't another person?"

  "The other day, when we went to the clothing store. When Lori came out wearing that pink blouse with the white lace around the cuffs, I recognized it. Debbie was wearing that blouse when we first met. I remember because I teased her about how shocking pink, it was. When I saw Lori choose it in the store, I stood there like I'd been struck by lightning, because it hit me that hard. I knew then that somehow-and don't even know how, yet-somehow Debbie and Lori are the same person. The only difference is the hair. Debbie's was darker. Not by much, either, now that I think of it, but it was darker. Seems to me that it was a little longer, too, but that may be my lousy memory. It's been a long time since I've seen Debbie."

  Darla came back from a swim and lay down beside me, her skin glistening wet in the sunlight. She had bought a one-piece maternity swimsuit with a little skirt, and she'd been complaining that she looked ridiculous. She didn't look ridiculous.

  I asked Carl, "Where did you meet Debbie?"

  "That's another strange thing. She came right up to me on the-"

  Carl sat up with a look of shocked realization.

  I nodded and said sympathetically, "Yeah, Carl, it's going to be rough."

  I tried to look fatherly.

  Lori and I had come down into L.A. by way of Sunset Boulevard, which had taken us through Brentwood, Westwood, Beverly Hills, and into West Hollywood. It had been a nice drive, traffic on the moderate side, and I had reached a point where I felt comfortable operating Dave's Volkswagen. It was a good, economical little car. I know, because I had filled it up before we left. Gasoline was ridiculously cheap as it was. I couldn't see the price staying that low for any length of time.

  "Okay," I said. "I'm going to let you off around Vine Street. Do you remember the address in Culver City?"

  "Yeah," Lori said. She was nervous and a little scared. "Dave's sister is expecting you at ten."

  "Ten, right. But I don't know where Culver City is."

  "If everything goes well, Carl-Carl Two, the double-should take you there. He knows where Culver City is."

  We had asked Dave if he knew anyone who could put Lori up for a few days. We couldn't have Carl Two bringing her to Dave's place. Carl One said that Debbie lived in Culver City, and it turned out, Dave had a, sister who lived there. Dave phoned her with the story of a social worker friend of his who ran a shelter for runaways, and of a girl who needed a place to stay because of overcrowding. Debbie Smith-nice kid, basically, just needs a little special attention. Dave's sister said fine, send her over.

  Lori was chewing her lip anxiously. "What's the matter?" I asked.

  "What if…?" She shivered. "Oh, Jake, this is so scary. What if I can't get Carl to pick me up? What happens then?"

  "Good question," I said, "and I'd be lying if I said I knew. I don't know what happens if you foul up a paradox. I don't know that a paradox can be fouled up. But I don't think you're going to have any trouble. Those jeans of yours look sprayed on."

  "They shrank in that silly clothes dryer of Dave's."

  "All to the good, I say. Just walk around looking as pretty as you are."

  She frowned and flicked a hand through her hair. "I think I look horrible as a brunette. What an awful color that dye turned out to be."

  "Darla did her best. Okay, what street is this?"

  "Bonita."

  I turned left, went two blocks, and turned right onto Hollywood Boulevard. I cruised for a few blocks, then pulled over.

  "This is it," Lori said.

  I looked around. "I don't see him, but our Carl said that this is one of his hunting grounds." There were plenty of kids out, riding in cars, shouting at one another, standing on street corners, and generally misspending their collective youth.
/>   Lori got out, closed the door, and poked her head in the window, her eyes wide with apprehension. "Jake? What if there really is a Debbie?"

  I smiled. "Don't stay out too late, Debbie."

  A little of the anxiety left her face, and she smiled thinly. "Wish me luck," she said.

  I watched her walk away. Those jeans really were a second skin. Carl Two didn't have a chance.

  17

  It was a lovely summer with an undercurrent of suspense. The Paradox seemed to be working out on schedule. "Debbie" saw "Carl" on the average of three times a week. They'd go out driving, cruising the main boulevards and meeting friends, or they'd go to "drive-in" motion picture theaters, afterward ingesting hamburgers and accompanying confections at various establishments offering same. Every odd day they went to the beach, where Debbie learned the rudiments of surfboarding, Frisbee sailing, and increasing the natural pigmentation of the skin by overexposure to ultraviolet radiation. All these activities, and more, we were told, were typical pastimes for young people of the period and locale. "Debbie" didn't care much for surfboarding. "I'm always hanging ten," she complained-whatever that meant.

  Meanwhile, Carl (our Carl) would grind his teeth. The drive-in movies upset him especially. He never mentioned it but once, and never asked Lori what transpired when the couple visited these "passion pits," as he called them.

  "I know damn well what they're doing," he told me. "'Cause I did it, too!"

  But he endured it. After all, it wasn't as if Lori were dating another guy. It was as if… In the final analysis, the language lacked the means for accurately describing the situation.

  It was good, then, that Lori spent a good deal of time over at Dave's sister's place. Shelly and her husband seemed to like "Debbie" a great deal, and didn't balk at the prospect of her staying on indefinitely.

  "Shelly can't turn away a stray animal," Dave explained. "Drives Bob nuts-they must have half a dozen cats by now." The couple had no children of their own.

  Dave took Lori down to the Federal Building in L.A. to get her a Social Security card, which she obtained by presenting the authorities there with a false birth certificate that Dave had conjured up.