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Blood Percussion

Page 2

by Nate Marshall


  i’ll

  airbrush

  you on

  any t-shirt.

  156.

  i would fight for you

  like my shoes or my

  boys or any excuse

  for contact.

  Ragtown prayer

  For Tyrone Lawson

  1.

  Dear Heavenly Father

  As we gather 2ma wit broken

  hearts, lost souls & heavy

  emotions to bury our love

  1 Tyrone we ask that you give

  us strength. We kno he’s in

  a better place watching down

  on us & you never make mistakes.

  I’m askn you watch over Tyrone’s

  family & Us…his Ragtown family.

  A lot of us dnt come 2 you

  bt that’s tha best thing about family…

  1 prayer can cover us all!!! We love

  & miss you Tyrone!

  R.I.P/B.I.P AMEN

  FROM ME & RAGTOWN

  2.

  No Father (Maybe He Heavenly?).

  2ma is broken. what we gather

  from this heavy life is souls, hearts,

  buried emotions, our love (& brother

  Tyrone is 1). you give, took him, no ask.

  We strength, he kno us.

  Better places watching down

  on us mistakes. You make nevers.

  I’m over you. Tyrone askn

  Us… family?Family? & Ragtown?

  2 a lot of us it is

  family: that best thing, tha

  cover, 1 prayer, love,

  Tyrone, a miss, & you.

  MEN & ME

  A RAG-TOWN

  R.I.P.

  *The 1st section was a Facebook status on the eve of Tyrone’s funeral.

  in the land where whitefolk jog

  he walk down the road

  dark & abandoned

  skull cap & scowl

  quick stride & limp.

  he mug & bump

  the sound of fuck you up

  in his headphones.

  he hear what goes bump

  other than him in the new

  moon’s no light. he brace

  for everything. he slide

  his key in between

  two fingers of his fist

  readies to aim somewhere

  soft & exposed.

  he contemplates a cheek

  or eye socket.

  he raise his hand out of pocket

  like a holster & cocks elbow.

  & the pat pat of New Balances

  bounce down & around the

  corner. & she glows in her

  peach thigh & sunflower

  shorts & she pat pat &

  he remembers key between fingers

  is for locking & also entry.

  he enters a decade earlier

  hoping for glory

  to wash him in high school.

  he straps up high top only

  athletic shoe he owns & is off.

  he around the corner & over the glitter

  of exploded Wild Irish Roses. he thump

  thump & crosses the paths of pits

  & shepherds & rottweilers.

  he see the neighborhood people there

  & he thump thump & they do too.

  he know they never seen someone run

  in not their hardest way.

  he never ran in less.

  he never been in land where

  jog is a memory.

  he never knew someone to run

  without having to join them

  or stop them in their tracks.

  Chicago high school love letters

  spring break

  214.

  i know all the museum

  free days by heart. you

  the exhibit i steal touch from

  in shadow.

  226.

  i’ll stay with you.

  even after

  the streetlights come

  on or don’t.

  praise song

  praise the Hennessy, the brown

  shine, the dull burn. praise

  the dare, the take it, the no face

  you’re supposed to make.

  praise the house, its many rooms,

  hardwood & butter leather couches

  its richness. praise the rich, their friendship.

  praise the friends: the child of the well off,

  the child of the well off, the child of well

  the child of welfare, the child of welfare.

  praise the diversity but praise the Hennessy,

  & again, & again. praise

  the new year upon us. praise my stumble,

  the shaky eye, the fluid arm, but the steady

  hand. praise my hand, the burning it has,

  praise the dive into the gut of a friend, the dousing

  of my hand in his ribs, praise the softness of skin,

  the way it always gives.

  praise the pulling, the calming down.

  praise the fuck that, the jump back into all

  five of my friends fist first. praise all

  five of my friends pinning me into the thick

  carpet, knees in my back, praise my back

  how it hurts & raises anyway how it flips,

  how it’s the best friend of my fists.

  praise the swinging pool cue, how it whips

  air like a disobedient child. praise the disobedient

  & all the chillingi won’t do.

  praise the child smile on my face, the fun

  plunging a knee into a cheek of my best friend.

  praise his blood, the brightness of it, a sun i bask in.

  praise my blood, the nose flowing wild with effort,

  the mess & taste of it, praise the swallowing,

  salt & its sweetness.

  praise the morning, the impossible blue,

  Midwestern January above us, praise

  the blues dulled in my denim by all

  the brown, praise the brown shine, the dull

  burn.

  praise all six in my jeans, our salt

  & life sitting dry on my thighs

  mixing, refusing to wash away.

  when it comes back

  in the locker room

  i’m staring at the far wall fresh

  off the weights considering the treadmill

  or just dressing & going. a white boy is

  naked in my sight line

  & mumbling:

  …get dressed & go…

  …hanging around…

  …fucking queer…

  i don’t know if I hear him right so I stop thinking

  about the treadmill. i hold my hoodie, hoist it

  over my head & down across my frame.

  the white boy (who is my daddy’s age)

  repeats himself & won’t put a towel over his waist.

  his stomach is an ugly puff of cloud above his cock

  & he keeps talking

  in a lover’s tone:

  … go home…

  …damn fairy…

  i’m back at Pullman Park.

  i’m a boy again with a brick

  in my hand, a boy under me. my brick

  kisses the boy in his mouth & i’m on top

  of the boy. my hand

  becoming the brick.

  meanwhile i make out

  the wordf_ggot.

  the white boy might be a veteran,

  an untreated mental health case to be so mad

  at someone for sitting in a public place

  & i’m some kind of veteran untreated mental health

  case. we’re closer than he knows.

  doesn’t he know that i could fuck him up

  if i wanted to? i’m fresh off the hack squat machine,

  my legs are coiled

  & i could kill him.

  Chicago high school love letters

  prom weekend


  320.

  jump the broom

  or turnstile. no car

  except kiss. no ride

  except want.

  331.

  this song is dedicated

  to you: either R. Kelly

  or R. Kelly. love

  ballad or elegy.

  in the event of my demise

  sprinkle my ashes

  across the north side of Chicago

  & the surrounding suburbs.

  the south side has seen

  too many black boys

  become the end

  of a flame.

  postlude: the day _____ died

  after Frank O’Hara

  it is __:__ in Chicago. a ___day

  three days after every day, yes

  it is 2006 2008 2010 2012 & i go get shoes

  because Jordan still happened & i don’t

  know if i will make it home for dinner every evening

  or if dinner will make it.

  i walk up the mean mugging street, a son

  & have a honey bun & a Nehi & buy

  a nameless CD to see what the rappers

  in Englewood are dreaming these days.

  i go to the currency

  spend half the money in a check just cashing it

  & Ms. _____ behind the bulletproof

  glass smiles for once in my life.

  at the ALDI i buy a bag of off brand chips for moms

  i text my girl Ree & we going to Navy Pier maybe

  this weekend. i think of Twista or Oscar Davis, Jr.

  or Curtis Mayfield but i blast Jennifer Hudson

  through my cell phone speaker on the bus

  & ponder family while falling asleep awake.

  i stroll into Fame Food & Liquor & ask for a grape Swisher

  & a pop & then i go back where i came from to 116th

  & into the candy store to ask for a peppermint pickle

  & there’s an obituary with my face on it

  & i am sweating a lot by now & thinking of

  leaning on the park bench in the hundreds

  when they started shooting during a pick up game

  between Carpenter & Morgan & everyone & i stopped breathing.

  Chicago high school love letter

  graduation

  333.

  hold me

  before

  i

  disappear.

  * the numbers in “Chicago high school love letters” represent the city’s homicides during the 2007-2008 Chicago Public Schools academic year.

  About the Author

  Nate Marshall is from the South Side of Chicago. He received his MFA in Poetry at The University of Michigan where he currently serves as a Zell Postgraduate Fellow. He received his BA at Vanderbilt University. A Cave Canem Fellow, his work has appeared or is forthcoming in POETRY Magazine, Indiana Review, The New Republic, [PANK] Online, and in many other publications.

  He was the star of the award winning full-length documentary Louder Than A Bomb and has been featured on HBO’s Brave New Voices. He is also an Assistant Poetry Editor for Muzzle and a Poetry Editor for Kinfolks Quarterly. Nate won the 2014 Hurston/Wright Amistad Award and the 2013 Gwendolyn Brooks Open Mic Award. Nate was named a semi-finalist for the 2013 “Discovery”/ Boston Review Poetry Contest. He was also a 2013 finalist for the Indiana Review Poetry Prize.

  Nate has been a teaching artist with organizations such as Young Chicago Authors, InsideOut Detroit, and Southern Word. Nate is the founder of the Lost Count Scholarship Fund that promotes youth violence prevention in Chicago.

  Nate is a member of the poetry collective Dark Noise. Nate has performed poetry at venues and universities across the US, Canada, and South Africa. He is also a rapper. Nate can be reached at natemarshallbooking@gmail.com.

 

 

 


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