Escaping Heartbreak

by Regina Bartley

  I walked to the edge of the porch and waved goodbye as he left. I couldn’t believe how much the two of us had been through…. I loved him long ago, and if I were honest with myself I loved him now. But friendship was the only thing I had to give at the moment. And it may be the only thing that I will ever have to give. Sometimes broken pieces won’t fit back together. At least that’s how my heart felt.

  Grabbing the rest of my clothes from the porch, I walked back inside. My phone sounded from the coffee table. I’d left it inside this whole time. When I checked my messages, I had one from Uncle Jake and one from Wren. Uncle Jake just wanted to check on me, but Wren sounded upset. I quickly dialed her number back, putting her on speakerphone. I had to change clothes. Standing there in just my wet bra and underwear, I was cold as hell.

  “Hello,” She sniffled into the phone. Only one word and I knew that she was crying.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” she responded. That was my bull-crap line. I knew better.

  “I know you’re upset. I can hear your nose running through the phone.” A small laugh escaped her.

  “It’s Dane.”

  “What’s wrong? What happened? What did he do?”

  “Nothing, everything,” I heard her exhale loudly. “You know how we slept together, right?”

  “I wasn’t in the room or anything, but yes. Please no details.”

  “Shut up Sawyer.” Her voice was playful, but still hurting.

  “Shutting up, now spill it.”

  “That next day, things were kind of distant between us. He said that he’d call, and I figured that he wouldn’t. So I called him.” The line went silent. “I may have called him more than once.” Oh no. What had my asshat brother done this time? “The first time I called he was so messed up that he didn’t even know who he was talking to. I couldn’t get through to him. I overlooked it because he gets drunk often and does some pretty stupid shit. Today when I called it was different. Once again he was messed up. Only this time,” She paused.

  “This time, what?”

  “He knew who I was, and he told me that wished he’d never slept with me.” Her crying started coming undone. I could barely make out what she was saying. She spoke again when she finally regained herself. I felt so sorry for her. “He said that he only fucked me because he was horny. He said that if he never saw my face again, that it would be too soon.” Her voice was choked. She was such a mess.

  “I’m so sorry Wren. I’m sure it was just the alcohol talking. He is such dick wad. You deserve so much better than him.” I tried to reason with her, help her to see that it wasn’t her fault.

  “That’s the problem Sawyer. Don’t you find it the least bit troubling that he is always messed up?”

  “I know he drinks a lot.”

  “Yes he does. But do you ever worry that maybe, he’s doing other things besides drinking.” Her voice was serious.

  “What are implying?”

  “I don’t know, he just didn’t sound right. He’s acting so different.”

  “So what? Now you think he’s, doing drugs or something? Don’t you think that I would know?” I could feel myself getting defensive, and for what reason. I was supposed to be comforting my friend. “Look, I’m sorry. I just think that I’d know if he were doing drugs or something.”

  “Yeah, I’m sorry.” Her words didn’t sound convincing. She was still upset. I could tell. “I know that he’s coming down this weekend to be with you, so I think I am going to stay home. I don’t want to see him.”

  “Are you sure? I can tell him not to come?”

  “No, it’s okay. I have a paper due for one of my classes, and I really think I need some time alone.”

  “Okay, but will you call me if you need me.”

  “Yeah,” were her only words. I didn’t like leaving things that way, but we clearly had a difference of opinion.

  “I love you Wren, and I promise you that you will find someone who loves you big one day.” I meant it, every word. She was beautiful and she had an amazing heart. They’d be crazy not to love her.

  “I hope you’re right.” She countered.

  “Psh, please. I am always right.”

  “Text me tomorrow,” her voice sounded a lot less harsh.

  “Of course. Night wench?” I joked

  “Night slut,” she hung up.

  I was feeling totally bummed. Wren’s heart was broken and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. My feelings were hurt over the accusations she’d made about Dane, but she was my best friend. If she was hurting then, I was hurting. I felt guilty, like it was my fault. I planned to give Dane hell about this when I saw him, and I intended on finding out the truth about what was going on with him. I knew he was out of control, but he needed to make things right with Wren. She deserved that much. He either needed to talk to her like a human being or not talk to her ever again. I was tired of him leading her on.

  I sent him a quick text.

  Me: What you said to Wren was dirty, and I hope the next time she sees you she kicks you in the balls causing them shrivel. Beware… This conversation isn’t over.

  I put my cell on the charger next to the couch. I sat down and curled up to watch T.V., to clear my mind of the day. I must have been exhausted. I barely made it five minutes into the show before I began dozing off.

  ###

  My hands were clenched tight around the steering wheel. The clock on the dash said I was ten minutes early. I took a deep breath and rested my head back on the headrest. What was I thinking coming here? I must have been out of my blessed mind. “It’s just dinner. No expectations. You don’t love him. You don’t love him. You don’t love him.” Yep, that didn’t work. I still kind of love him. After that kiss on the dock yesterday, I couldn’t seem to shake him or the chemistry that sizzled between us like a live wire. Before it was like a memory, and I could easily replace him or forget about him. Now it seemed so real. I knew how he really felt about me, and it scared the crap out of me.

  I stepped out of the truck closing the door behind me. Travis’s house was really small compared to mine. It had a cottage type feeling to it. It was the same place that he lived at all those years ago when his parents were here with him. Only now, it was a bit older.

  I knocked lightly and waited for him to answer.

  The door opened and Waylon stood there. I smiled at him. He really was the cutest kid ever. The boy was going to steal his share of hearts. His blue eyes look just like Travis’s.

  “Hey,” he said. He shook the hair out of his eyes.

  “What’s up genius?” He smiled at my words. Then I stuck my tongue out at him. Hey, I never claimed I was mature, and he was so much fun to mess with. Teenage boys were so easily mocked.

  He rolled his eyes. “Hey Sawyer,” Travis stood in the doorway. My face began to heat up. Had he seen me stick out my tongue? “I see the two of you already know each other well.” Just great. Already making an idiot of myself, what was new?

  “Yeah, we’re cool.” I looked at Waylon, and he nodded.

  “Uh huh,” Travis chuckled. “Come on in.” I followed Waylon in the house.

  “Something smells good.” The smell of something Italian was filling the room.

  “It’s not much. I only know how to cook a couple things in the kitchen. I mostly use the grill.” Seeing him there in that environment was great. The house was well put together. Everything had a place, and it was so clean, which surprised me considering it was just the two of them. “Make yourself at home. I’ll be in the kitchen. The foods almost done.”

  “Sure,” I smiled at him. He looked so cute in his light colored jeans and his tight black t-shirt. All I kept thinking was, I know what’s under that shirt. I looked away before he could read my facial expression.

  “Waylon,” Travis yelled up the stairs.

  “Yeah,” Waylon yelled back.

  “Get washed up. Dinner’s almost ready.”

  “Okay,” he
replied.

  Travis locked eyes with me, and I cocked my head to the side. I gave him a knowing smile, and he just nodded. No words were spoken, but they weren’t needed. His simple words were his way of telling me the truth, and my understanding was all he needed. Travis was Waylon’s brother, but more importantly he was the only one here to take care of him. I knew that he wanted me to know, and maybe he just wasn’t sure how to tell me. This was his subtle way.

  He winked at me just before he walked into the kitchen. Damn him. This friendship thing was gonna be a lot harder than I thought. I wasn’t sure if it was possible to be just friends with someone when they still unknowingly hold your heart.

  SIXTEEN

  Travis

  I could tell by the look in her eyes that she understood. It was just Waylon and me. She didn’t ask any dreaded questions that I wasn’t prepared to answer. We had an unseen understanding. I couldn’t tell her that because my father died young, and my mother went crazy that I’d had to grow up fast. That at nineteen, I had already become a father. Now at twenty four, I had responsibilities, more than most grown men. The words would kill me to say, and would kill her to hear. The simple acceptance that lingered in her stare was enough for me.

  The three of us sat down at the table. I had already placed Spaghetti and garlic bread on the table.

  “This looks great.” Sawyer spoke first.

  “Travis makes the best spaghetti.” Waylon said, already piling his plate high. Everyone laughed.

  “The best huh? Wait until you have mine.” Sawyer winked at Waylon. Date number two flashed in my mind, not that this was a date. I smiled at the thought. I couldn’t be happier with the way things were going. Truthfully, I thought that it would be weird. I didn’t know that both Sawyer and Waylon would get along so well, and I thought maybe she’d freak when she found out it was just the two of us. If she ever decided that she wanted to take things further with me, then he was part of the deal. He was my responsibility. I wasn’t complaining because I wouldn’t want it any other way. But I didn’t want it to put some kind of weird vibe between us either.

  “How’s tutoring going Waylon?” I asked. I already knew the answer. He didn’t put forth any effort what so ever. I didn’t have any way of getting him to buckle down. It was truly killing me.

  “Fine,” he looked at me then to Sawyer.

  “He’s pretty smart. I think he won’t need tutoring much longer.” Sawyer looked at me then back at Waylon. Was I missing something here? I hadn’t heard one person in the entire school say anything remotely like –he’s pretty smart. I knew he was, but he never tried or let anyone else know. The two of them were looking at their food and back at each other awkwardly.

  “What’s going on? Who wants to let me in on the secret?” I asked.

  “There’s no secret.” Sawyer said. Waylon shook his head no.

  “Uh, huh.” I nodded. “All right then. I see how this is gonna be.” The two of them just laughed. I took my garlic bread, pulled it apart into two pieces and flung them at their heads. I was sitting in between them so I had a perfect shot at each of them. They were in shock. Waylon tossed his bread back at me, nailing me in the temple. That was all it took. The food fight was underway. I don’t know who threw the first meatball, but Sawyer’s came flying at my head. I didn’t have time to miss it. I turned my head and it caught me right on the cheek. We were all cracking up. Food was everywhere.

  “Look at this disaster.” I stated. The kitchen was a mess from top to bottom.

  “Do you guys do this often?” Sawyer asked pulling spaghetti from her hair.

  Waylon was covered. He shook his head no. It was the truth. The two of us rarely spoke over dinner. We’d been arguing so much lately that it was just easier that way. This was definitely out of the ordinary for us but in such a good way. We had been in need of some fun, and this was perfect although my kitchen would need an overhaul. It was amazing what a meatball to the head could do. I had a whole new perspective. Fun time with Waylon was what I needed. Once again I owed Sawyer a thank you.

  “Hey buddy. Why don’t you go upstairs and get a shower, and get ready for bed. It’s gonna take you a while to get all that sauce out of your hair.”

  “Yeah okay.” He smiled at me. It was a genuine one. “Good night.” He said to both me and Sawyer, giving Saw a small smile and a slight wave. He shook off the noodles before heading upstairs.

  “He’s a cute kid,” Sawyer stood up from the table. She looked so cute covered in Spaghetti.

  “He looks like me.”

  She rolled her eyes. “He acts like you too.”

  We both began cleaning off the table. This mess was going to take me hours to clean up. “You don’t have to help. I’ll get it.”

  “I don’t mind, and it won’t take as long with two of us.”

  Every time I looked at her I couldn’t help laughing. She had this long noodle hanging off the side of her head. Each time she moved her head it would swing back and forth.

  “What are you laughing at?” She put her hands on her hips.

  I stepped up in front of her, still laughing. I heard her breath catch and realized how close I was into her space. My laughter stopped. We seemed to have this moment a lot. Every time we were that close to each other it was as if two worlds collided into one. One breath, one body, one heartbeat. I couldn’t think straight. Her body inches from mine did crazy things to me. I wanted to push her up against the cabinet and kiss every single inch of her body. I wanted to feel her smooth skin under my fingers. If I listened hard enough, I could hear her scream my name out in ecstasy.

  “Travis,” she said, her voice was low and raspy. I focused on the sound of her voice and it caused my dick to grow harder. Mother fucker she was like a drug. I was so addicted and I couldn’t shake her no matter how hard I tried. It was hard alright.

  She has to come to me. She has to come to me. I repeated the words over and over in my head. I couldn’t take her running away again. Next time I kiss her, she was going to want me to, and she won’t want me to stop.

  I reached up grabbing the lonely noodle hanging in her hair and dangled it in front of her face. She let out a long breath as if she’d been holding it the whole time. Then she reached for the noodle. Instead of letting her have it, I swung it towards her face and it smacked her on the forehead. It stuck. The laughter started again. She tried to chase me around the kitchen, but I was too quick. Thank God. When I got behind the bar, I had to adjust my pants.

  “Truce,” she yelled. I had her head tucked under my pit, screaming headlock. It reminded me of when I used to pick on her a long time ago. Some things never changed. It was just as much fun now as it was when we were kids. Only now, Dane wasn’t here to punch me, in her honor.

  “Fine,” I let her go.

  “You’re still a punk, Travis Lawson.”

  “And you’re still a weakling, Sawyer Evans.” I countered.

  The two of us worked together to clean up the rest of the kitchen. I offered her a washcloth to wash her face. She needed it. I tried to give her clean clothes, but she insisted she was fine.

  “I had a really good time tonight. I’m still kind of hungry though,” she admitted.

  “I’m sorry. I can make it up to you.”

  “Oh yeah, how?” Her eyes narrowed.

  “I am a master at dessert.” I waggled my eyebrows.

  “Okay master, let’s see what you got?”

  I reached in the cupboard and pulled out two honey buns.

  “Little Debbie’s” she snickered.

  “Hey! Not just Little Debbie’s. When I’m finished these will be Travis’s specialty buns.”

  “Seriously,” she shook her head.

  I took the buns out of the package and put them on a plate. I microwaved them until they were good and warm. Then I covered them in chocolate syrup. She watched me work the entire time. “Viola,” I set the plate between us on the bar.

  “Well, it looks good, and it s
mells good.”

  “That’s because it is good Woman. Now try it.”

  I watched as she took a bite of my concoction. Not a good idea. That’s twice she’s made me hard, without even touching me. You’d think I was sixteen again. I seriously needed to get laid.

  “This is so good.” She mumbled. I reached for the fork in her hand and she jerked back. “Get your own.”

  Laughing, I jumped up to grab another. If I didn’t hurry, I’d never get a bite. All in all, the evening had turned out to be a damn good time. I hoped that we would make this a habit. Waylon really liked her, and she seemed to bring out the kid in him. He didn’t have that look of worry about him, when she was around.

  “I’m glad you came over tonight.” I opened the front door and walked with her out to the porch.

  “Me too. I might take that back if I still smell like spaghetti tomorrow.” She smiled up at me.

  “Hey, that could start trending. I think you smell delicious.” I leaned back on the post of the porch.

  “Not a good idea. I want to attract men, not dogs.”

  “I’m attracted.” I firmly stated. She peeked up through her lashes. For a moment, I thought I had said too much. Then she smiled. If she was going to be around me, she has to know I’m going to flirt. I couldn’t help myself, especially when it came to her.

  “Good night Travis.”

  “Night Sawyer. When will I see you again?”