Differently Morphous

by Yahtzee Croshaw

  Thief: Acolyte A discovered the true identity of the evil salamancer and released my character.

  Thief: My character passed a stealth check and was able to hide while the evil salamancer completed their plans.

  Priest: I think my character knows the rest from the news reports.

  Priest: The evil salamancer was defeated, mind wiped by a dispel ritual in public, and now tainted ones have gained even more sympathy than before.

  Priest: How’d it get so fouled up?

  Thief: My character’s hope was that the evil salamancer would kill Acolyte A.

  Priest: Of course it was.

  Priest: I asked myself, what would be the worst, most inhuman thing a person could possibly want from all this? And that was it. You never disappoint.

  Priest: Still, I see the logic. Dead pretty girls are always good publicity.

  Thief: Whereas all we have now is a not-quite-dead, not-quite-pretty girl that has worked just as effectively against us.

  Thief: My character lost control of events. That’s always the risk when trying to nudge them in secret.

  Priest: How did A get hold of your character’s dispel circle?

  Thief: She must have taken it from my character while he was imprisoned.

  Priest: Are you sure about that? You said Doctor D was gaining respect for her.

  Thief: No, I said that D was leading her to believe that.

  Thief: In any case, he’s too rudimentary to overrule my decisions.

  Priest: As long as you’re certain.

  Priest: I mean, YOUR CHARACTER is certain, pardon me.

  Priest: In summary, everything was going swimmingly until it all backfired at the last minute.

  Priest: Can’t wait to see how you top this. What’s your next evil scheme?

  The man leaned back, allowing his head to sink into the chair’s backing for a moment as he scrutinized the ceiling in thought. After a full minute, he returned to the keyboard.

  Thief: I’m getting the team back together.

  Priest: Are you.

  Priest: And how will it be different this time?

  Thief: We have a new purpose.

  Thief: The new DEDA cannot act without public scrutiny. We don’t have that restraint.

  Priest: You’re actually serious.

  Priest: You really think being back at full force will make it any easier to nudge events?

  Thief: I’m done with nudging. It’s time for something stronger.

  Priest: How much stronger?

  Thief: I’m thinking a push. A very hard push.