by K. Renee
I don’t know a whole lot about his biker life, but I can only hope that they are a riding club and not one of the MC’s that the local cops have been trying to shut down for years.
By the time I get to the office, I’m already fifteen minutes late. I spent a little longer wrapped up in his arms than I should have, but I don’t regret a minute of it. Besides my job, getting to talk to him has been the highlights of my days. I know I shouldn’t think that way, but it’s hard not to. It’s like I just know. I just know that he is the one I was meant to find. Kind of like that fairytale romance that women believe in. The romance that makes it seem like for the first time, everything is in color and not just black and white anymore.
As soon as I drop my go bag on the floor next to my desk, and set my computer down on my chair, Dixon is calling us all into the conference room. I make my way towards the conference room and see the rest of the guys following behind me. As I take a seat in the chair closest to my right, I see Milli standing off to the side looking a little hesitant.
The reason she only looks hesitant is if the crime is a really violent one or children. I just pray that we aren’t going on another child abduction case. Those ones are the ones that hit me the worse. My little brother was a victim of a child abduction case when we were younger. It’s part of the reason I wanted to be in this unit. I wanted to be able to track down the sick sons of bitches that think hurting children is okay.
There isn’t a day that I don’t think about his disappearance or the way it destroyed our family. My parents never spoke to each other after that day. I watched their once loving and happy marriage fizzle out like the remnants of the fire my dad set to burn every memory of their once happy life.
My mom became unfit to raise me and I was left to be in the care of my father. He became a cold bastard after Talon died. He couldn’t even look at me without seeing my little brothers face. He resented the fact that I was still alive and my little brother wasn’t. He told me I didn’t protect him the way I should have.
I knew he was angry, but as a kid it destroyed me. As I got older, I made it my mission to stay out of his way. I only came out of my room when it was necessary and never when he was drinking.
A hand on my shoulder brings me away from my memories. “You alright?” Fox whispers. I nod my head and look up to the front where I see the photos from the new case. Fuck. The scenes in front of me make my stomach turn.
How the fuck are people okay with this shit?
My eyes lock on the first photo. Now I can see why Milli had that look on her face. My eyes scan over every inch of the photo. The woman looks like someone bashed her head in with something. She’s almost unrecognizable. Her blonde hair is matted to her head with dark blood. I scan down her body and see the marks covering most of her skin. Welts, burns, and cuts cover most of her arms and bare stomach.
Whoever fucking did this is a God damn animal. Her clothes are practically torn off of her and most of the cuts look deep. She probably passed out from the pain that this bastard was inflicting on her.
“This woman is believed to be part of a sex trafficking ring. The man was in charge of it is at large and we believe that a few of the local motorcycle clubs are helping get the girls to them. There are a few other players that include a drug cartel and a few others that we have no information on yet.”
“Fuck.” I mutter. I look at the next photo and see another blonde who looks like someone beat the fuck out of her. She is covered in bruises and when my eyes get to her naked skin, I see a brand on her skin. When I suck in a breath, all the eyes shoot towards me. I’ve seen the brand before. I can feel my breathing start to quicken and the spots swim in my vision.
There is no fucking way. No God damn way.
Getting up out of my chair, I dash towards the bathroom. The urge to throw up is way stronger than I am. Pushing open one of the stalls, I dry heave into the toilet. I hear the door to the bathroom open, but I ignore Canaan as he says my name.
“Spence, you good?” he asks.
I wipe my mouth and spit into the toilet a few times before I flush it. When I come out of the stall, Canaan is standing by the sinks, leaning against the wall. He doesn’t say anything when I walk over towards him to wash out my mouth with the water from the tap. Instead he hands me a paper towel and waits silently.
“I’m fine.” My tone comes off bitchier than I intended. The sight of that brand brings back the memories I’ve tried like hell to forget.
“You don’t look fine,” he mutters. Just as I turn to face him, he continues. “What the fuck was that? I’ve known you awhile now and nothing phases you when it comes to cases. You’re always the one to see between the damn lines and get us into the right direction. What the fuck made you dash into the bathroom to throw up?”
I don’t bother answering him. Instead I take off towards my desk and grab my phone out of my bag, with Canaan right on my heels. “Seriously Spence, what the fuck is going on?”
I spin around and put my finger into his chest. “Stay the fuck out of it.” A clearing of a throat brings my attention to the rest of the guys and Milli. All eyes are on me, I can feel the anger start to bring itself to the surface. There is no fucking way I’m talking about this shit. No damn way.
Chapter Thirteen
As soon as I pull into the clubhouse parking lot, I see the brothers all gathered around by the bike shop. After parking and getting off my bike, I make my way towards the crowd. Putting my hand on Brantley’s shoulder, I see all the long faces. “What’s going on?” I whisper to him.
He looks at me and then nods towards our old man. “Our old man got a visit from some Fed.” I feel my eyebrows shoot up as I stare at our father.
“For what?” I ask. A few of the guys turn to look at me, but I ignore them.
“They think we have something to do with some case their working on. Instead of letting them go after Prez, he stepped up and took the questioning.” I frown and look back at our father. He’s pissed and him and Prez seem to be in a heated discussion that no one but them can hear. The door to the office is shut and no one is allowed in. All of us are pretty much gathered around the office door like bitches waiting to hear the latest gossip.
As soon as they stop their yelling match, they turn to look at us all gathered outside. When the door opens, I can see the anger radiating off our old man. He’s pissed and I don’t get why.
“Church!” Prez yells from behind our old man. The guys start to make their way towards church, I follow behind Brant and Jase.
“What do you think it’s about?” I ask.
It’s Jase who answers me this time. “I’m thinking the body yesterday.” Before I can say anything he changes the subject. “Where the fuck were you last night? We called for a straight fucking hour!” I shrug off his question, but he doesn’t let it go all that easy.
“You fucking some chick you don’t want the rest of us to know about? Does that mean you and River are over?” I swear sometimes its like a damn soap opera with these dick heads.
“I don’t know how many times I have to say that River and I aren’t together. Never have been never will be. She’s in love with that bastard Seb. Go bust his balls for not making a move on her.” They both start to laugh, I know they aren’t going to do shit. Because just like everyone else, they think that River and I are together.
By the time we are all gathered in church and in our seats, Prez is slamming the gavel down on the table. The loud crack of it hitting the table echoes through the room and everyone becomes silent.
My old man puts his hands together in a prayer like symbol and both of his pointer fingers are pressed to his lips, almost like he’s trying to keep himself from saying something.
“Shit’s about to get a whole lot worse before it gets better for us.” Prez says, his voice low and dark. Ever since Raef’s death, Prez has been angrier than before. My old man said he hasn’t been this bad since Avelyn died.
“We lost a brother, a son.
Now the Feds are trying to pin the deaths of women on us. That bitch that kidnapped Axle, she is one of the women they think we killed. Although I wish it was us who ended her, I know we didn’t touch her.” He runs his fingertips along the table in front of him for a few minutes before he looks up at us. “I want revenge on the fuckers who killed my son. I want to find these fuckers that are trying to take us down. Those bastards wanted Sailor and I sure as shit ain’t letting anything happen to her.” His eyes scan around the table and when he gets to my old man, he nods his head.
“She’s being protected. Sailor is under our protection because it’s what Raef wanted. She may be trying to keep us at arms length, but I’m not letting anything happen to his girl.” We all nod our heads to his statement. “Nick and I have been talking about our next move. We are trying to let her live her life in Sacramento like she wants, but we need eyes on her. Sacramento says they’ve got it. Right now, I’m going to trust them. I got rid of the bastards who didn’t believe the shit Raef was saying. I replaced them with men that I trust.”
Silence in the room is deafening. I can hear my own heartbeat thumping clearly. The mention of Raef and Sailor bring back all the fucking thoughts of what happened that day. I try to push that shit out of my head, but it all comes pouring back in like it was happening now. I was right by Prez when Raef threw himself in front of that bullet. I should have taken that bullet instead of him. I didn’t have a girl I was madly in love with like he did. I wouldn’t have let the love of my life watch as I died on the fucking ground.
I close my eyes and try to fight back the memories and all the things I wish I would have done to save him. She needs him more than the brothers need me right now.
A few throats clear around the table, I know that this shit affect us all still. Six months doesn’t seem like nearly enough time when you think about it. It still feels like just yesterday.
“What are we going to do?” I ask. I can’t continue to think about Raef and Sailor without fucking breaking down, wishing things were different. I need to focus on something I can do now. I need to know what our options are. Who we are going after? We need to find the fuckers who put the bullet in his damn chest and stop waiting to strike them.
“A source in the department said they think that bastard from the strip club Anslie’s mom was hanging around might be involved which means I’m going to pay that bitch a visit.”
Brant stands from his seat and I can see the anger radiating off of him.
“Sit.” Prez demands. Brant doesn’t move and I have to give him credit for that. He may be fucking Prez’s daughter, but it doesn’t mean he can deny an order.
“No. I want to take that bitch down. She’s been doing nothing but fucking with my girl’s head. I’m sick of her shit and I’m done watching my girl cry herself to sleep every night.” I can feel the change in the damn room at his statement. Judging by the look on Prez’s face, he didn’t know it had gotten that bad between Anslie and her mom.
“She’s been calling?” He growls from the head of the table.
“Yeah. She was still hiding that shit from me because of your order. When I wake up to my pregnant ole’ lady crying in the middle of the night I get a little pissed. I forced her to tell me the truth. She told me she’s been getting calls and texts from that bitch since we seen her at the damn club. She saw us. She knew we were there and now she’s trying to get back at us for taking Danielle.”
I see Ryder tense up in his seat. Ever since he pulled Danielle out of that strip club, he’s been over protective of her. I get why he did that shit too. Her then boyfriend was slapping her around and forcing her to sell herself to the customers. We found out that Anslie’s bitch of a mom was back in town for who knows what reason too. “If she comes at Ellie, I won’t hesitate to put a bullet in her. She won’t fuck with my woman.” He’s pissed now too. Pretty soon this shit is going to just get worse and nothing is going to get solved.
“Ryder, I’ve known you a long time, but you won’t kill anyone unless it’s sanctioned. We are under a lot of heat and I won’t let any of you get thrown in jail for this shit.” My old man says quietly. Prez nods his head in agreement and Brant takes his seat again.
“We need to get a handle on all those bastards that were left from the shit that went down in Sacramento. I need you guys to put some feelers out. I want answers about who is still standing after we took most of them down. If I need to, I’ll talk to Sailor again.” Heads start to nod at the words Prez says and I can feel the tension in the room. Everyone is pissed for different reasons, but mainly it’s because we’ve always been two steps behind those bastards even after that shit went down in Sacramento.
“I don’t want you guys out unless you have someone else with you.” Prez says more as an afterthought. “I have no idea if someone is going to strike or if the Feds are going to try and haul any of our asses into the station because of this shit. Stay fucking alert. Keep the women and children safe.”
He slams the gavel on the table ending church. The crack echoes through the room, I go to stand up. My brother’s hand at my shoulder stops me. When I turn to look at Seb, I can’t read his expression. It’s a mix between anger and something else. “We need to talk.” I nod my head and follow him out towards the back of the clubhouse. We walk through the kid’s area and up the stairs towards the game room.
When he comes to a stop in front of the pool table, I stop too. “What?” I ask. I already feel on edge with the shit that’s been going on. I want the club to go back to the way we were before all the drama and wars started. I liked it better when we were a damn family first and everything else second. We worked, had fun, and celebrated life. We didn’t see death. We didn’t lose our brothers.
“Why the fuck was River at a club alone last night?” The rage fills his expression. I should have known he would be pissed about her. He’s always pissed when it comes to her.
“I’ve told you time and time again, she’s not my girl. She fucks who she wants, when she wants. If she wants to go to a damn club, that’s her business not mine.” He puts his hand on my chest and pushes me back.
“She’s been your damn girl since high school.” he growls.
“River and I have never been together. Everyone just assumes that shit.” He stares at me as he takes my words in. “She’s been in love with you for years. I’ve tried to get that shit through your damn head, but you don’t fuckin' listen.”
“I’m not going after your girl.” He sighs, stepping back and leaning against the pool table again.
“You wouldn’t be. She’s my best friend and that’s it.” I state. He frowns and I know he’s trying to figure out something in his head.
“Then where the fuck did you disappear to last night?” I shrug. I don’t want to answer that. There is no way that he’s going to accept that I’m gay. Out of my brothers I think only Brant will understand. I don’t think he’d judge me. He may give me shit for it, but he’d never judge me like the others will.
“I went for a ride.” He raises an eyebrow at my answer, but doesn’t ask anything else. He lets it go for once. Just as he turns to walk away, I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket.
River: E, I need you.
When he sees my face, he stops. She doesn’t typically need me. She typically tells me to get my ass to her house now. Hell, she never calls me E either. Something’s wrong. I don’t even say anything as I push past Sebastian. He follows me through the clubhouse and out towards the bike. I get on my bike and crank the engine, with him doing the exact same thing.
The brothers try to get my attention, but the only thing I can think about is getting to River. She needs me and I won’t let anything happen to her.
Chapter Fourteen
After my little scene with Canaan, Dixon pulled me into his office. As I’m sitting here staring at the man I’ve called my boss for the last three years, I can’t help but think that I may need to pull away from this case. It’s bringing up bad memories that
I can’t deal with right now.
“What happened in there?” He finally asks after we’ve been sitting in the silence for the last five minutes.
“I can’t work this case.” I state. I don’t want to get into it, but I know he’s not going to give me the choice. We don’t get to pick and choose the cases we work. We are a team and we take every case on together.
“Why?” he demands.
I sit back against my chair and stare at the bookshelf behind him. Trying to find the words is even more difficult than I expected. I try to open my mouth and say the words, but nothing comes out. Instead he starts to talk. “I’ve read your file. I know about your little brother’s disappearance when you were a child and I know what happened to your mother. You recognized the brand on one of the victims.”
If he knew all this shit then why the fuck is he asking me. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “Yes.” I whisper. I feel like all my defenses are falling around me and there is nothing that I can do to stop them. I don’t want to talk about them. I don’t want to remember the pain I felt when I had to go and identify my mother because my bastard of a father didn’t give two shits about her after my brother died.
Instead, I lost the two of the people I loved the most. Well three. After my mom’s death, my father’s drinking got worse and he was never the same. He was angry all the time, I could see the pain in his eyes the minute he sobered up again.
“I can’t go there.” I say with as much conviction as I can muster. It sounds weak even to my own ears, but I let him make the final decision.
“You mean you don’t want to catch the bastards who did this to her?” His eyes never leave me and suddenly I feel like I’m standing next to a fire in the middle of the summer. Sweat is starting to dust my hairline and I can feel the sweat as it starts to drip down my back.