by K. Renee
“I just can’t. I want that bastard to rot in hell, but I can’t see my mother’s face every time I look at those photos.” My voice trails off towards the end and I want to get the fuck out of his office. I want to go home and head back to bed. Hell, I would give anything to rewind back to this morning when I had Elijah’s strong arms wrapped around me, holding my body to his.
“You’re not going to like my answer.” I nod my head, because I know what he’s about to say. “Take the rest of the day off. Come in tomorrow and we can go from there. We need you on this case. I know you’ve been looking into it when you get the down time. There might be things that you’ve noticed along the way that can help.” He doesn’t continue and I’m grateful for it.
Most cops would jump at the thought of being able to find their mothers killer, but I’m not one of them. The road I’ve traveled since she died is the hardest one I’ve ever endured. I don’t want to go back down the road, but I also want closure. I want to be able to tell my drunk of an old man that I found who killed her. Hell, I want to be able to find out who killed my little brother too.
They say that Jeffery White killed my little brother, but the timeline and evidence never lined up. I’ve actually visited Jeffery in prison when I was a detective. I got the same answers they got all of those years ago. If he was lying, the story would have varied, but not Jeffery’s. His story was exactly the same as the day he was interviewed.
I get out of the chair I’m occupying and I make my way towards the door. “Thank you.” I mumble. He nods his head and I turn to walk out of his office and towards my desk. I grab my bag and head towards the elevator. I hear my name called, but I don’t respond. There is nothing I can say to make this sick feeling go away. Knowing that I am going to be working this case in the morning makes me sick to my damn stomach.
I’m going to find out exactly what she went through before she died. I’m going to picture her face on the new victims, and I’m going to find the person responsible for the crime.
As soon I get to my house, I walk inside and get a whiff of Elijah. The smell of grease and motor oil fill my entry way. The moment I throw myself on my bed, I smell him. A scent that I can only describe as Elijah covers my pillows and my blanket. Grabbing my phone from my pocket, I find his number and type out a text.
Me: So I have the rest of the day off, you care to come join me?
He doesn’t respond, so I can only imagine what he’s doing. Instead of thinking about him with someone else, I pull the covers over my head and shut my eyes. Maybe when I wake up, this will be just a sick dream.
The sound of my phone beeping wakes me. Grabbing the damn thing, I hit the center button and wait for the screen to turn on. When I click the messages, I see Canaan’s name on the screen.
Canaan: Everything good?
Rubbing my hand over my face, I roll over to my stomach and start to write him back.
Me: No.
His response is immediate. Once thing about Canaan that I admire is he’s persistent. If he doesn’t get an answer to his question, he keeps coming back with the same question until he gets an answer.
Canaan: Come open the door.
I groan and roll over to my back. Of course that bastard is here. He wasn’t going to let that shit slide today. I should have known. Getting up from my bed, I stalk through the house and make my way to the front door. As soon as I open it, he’s pushing his way inside and he’s got a twelve pack of beer.
I watch him walk towards the kitchen and put the beer in the fridge, keeping two for us. He pops the caps and sets them on the counter before coming back towards me, handing me one. I walk towards the couch and take a seat, leaning my head back against the cushions.
“You want to talk about what happened?” He finally asks after a few beats.
“Not really.” I mutter. He doesn’t get that this shit lives within me and I rather not dwell on it any more than I have to right now. Tomorrow I’m going to get thrown into this case and I don’t know how I’m going to deal with it.
“We’ve been friends for a while now. I’m not going to push you into telling me, but just know that I’m here if you need to talk.” He kicks his feet up on my coffee table and leans back on the couch.
“Thanks man.” I say quietly. Just as I’m about to say something else to him, my phone buzzes with a new message. I see Elijah’s name that he left in my phone and I can’t help but grin. Even though it’s taken him hours, I’m still glad to see his name on my screen.
My Sexy Biker: Sorry babe. I’ve got shit to deal with here and just got your message. If I can break free tonight, I’ll stop by.
I frown and I can feel Canaan’s eyes on me. “Your fuck buddy fall through for tonight?” he jokes.
“He said he has some shit going on.” I write out a quick reply and toss my phone on the coffee table. Its not like I’ll be getting anymore messages while he’s busy doing whatever. Plus the chief won’t let anyone at the office call me tonight anyways.
“How did you get the night off?” I ask. I know for sure that Dixon wouldn’t let the whole team have the night off if we were on a case.
“We are waiting on some test results and waiting on a few more files to be dropped off. We’ve interviewed a couple of motorcycle clubs and the victims’ families. Not much more we can do tonight.” He rolls his shoulders as if he’s trying to get a picture off his mind.
“How many victims so far?” I ask.
“Three that we know of.” He answers slowly. I can feel the doom floating over my head right now. He’s going to say that my mother was one of the victims. By now I’m sure the whole team knows about her. I close my eyes to keep from lashing out at Canaan. It’s not his fault. He wasn’t the one who did that shit to her or the other women.
“One is my mom, isn’t it?” I look over at him and see the look he’s giving me. It’s a mixture of pity and anger. The only reason I can see him being angry is because we’ve become friends.
“Yeah. They want to exhume her body to gather evidence that wasn’t recovered originally.”
I blow out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. “What more could they find. The detectives on her case didn’t find anything to point to a killer. What makes us think we can find anything now?” I ask sounded exhausted.
My mind is running through a million different scenarios, all of which she could have died from. After she left me to live with my dad, we didn’t hear from her. It had been a few years until I got word that I needed to come identify the body. At thirteen, I wasn’t in the state of mind to do something like that, but my father didn’t give me a choice. He refused to go and ID her. He told me and the detective that she deserved what happened to her.
“I don’t know man. But what if we find something?” He takes a long pull from his beer and then starts to mess with the label.
“I doubt they will find anything. It’s a lost cause. I’ve looked for years into her case and I haven’t been able to find shit out.” I say bitterly. I should be happy that we are going to have a chance to look over this case, but part of me doesn’t want to. It brings back a lot of bad memories and I’m not sure if I’m strong enough to go through them again.
Canaan and I spend the next few hours talking about random shit and drinking beers.
Chapter Fifteen
The minute I walk through River’s door, I can tell something is off. I’ve been here a shit load of times and never noticed the decorative plate that is by the door. It’s on the ground now and smashed to pieces. A few pieces of her mixed matched furniture are moved around from their normal spots.
I dash towards her bedroom and when I come to the doorway, I stop dead in my tracks. I feel Seb run straight into the back of me. His force causes me to go through the doorway and closer towards where River is. She’s sitting on the edge of her bed. The sheets are all messed up and I can see the black mascara smeared on her cheeks.
Walking towards her, I kneel down in front of her and cup her face with my ha
nds. “River.” I whisper softly. Her soft cries feel like I’m being stabbed in the damn chest. I should have been here for her last night. I shouldn’t have let her go out alone.
I turn to see Seb behind me, but he doesn’t say a word. He just stares down at her.
“River, I need you to tell us what happened.” I say as gently as I can. I’m furious that someone even put their hands on her. My eyes scan over her face and I notice the slight swelling. They continue their scan and I see the marks on her neck. She has a couple scratch marks on her neck and arms. “River.” I say a little more harshly.
Her eyes snap to mine and when she finally sees me, she wraps her arms around my neck and cries on my shoulder. I can feel the anger radiating off of Seb, but he continues to watch us. He doesn’t once say a word and it makes me nervous. It’s been a while since I’ve seen Seb this mad. He can typically keep his tempter in check.
“Babe, I need foryou to tell me what happened.” I whisper in her ear. She cries harder and I pick her up to move her. When I look down at her bed, I see some blood. My grip on her tightens and I move out of the room with her.
“River.” Seb’s voice comes gently from behind me. I sit us on the couch so she’s straddling my lap. He takes a seat next to me and she slowly turns her head to look at him.
“What happened?” Her bottom lip trembles as she watches him, but doesn’t say a word. “River,” he says again.
“I should have…” she trails off for a second before she starts again. “I should have gone home with you Seb. I’m so sorry.” She starts to cry again. I pull her to my chest and let her sob against me. Her whole body trembles and I hate that something happened to her. It reminds me of the shit that Anslie went through a few years ago.
“Baby, you didn’t do anything wrong. Whoever put his hands on you is the only one that did something wrong.” He states running his hand down her back. When I look over at him, I can see the rage burning in his eyes.
“Who was it River?” I ask. She shakes her head no and I have to keep myself from saying something that I regret. I want her to tell us the truth so we can handle it. If she doesn’t, I know that Seb is going to search this fucker out, not caring who he hurts in the process. Right now, we don’t need that type of attention, especially with the Feds questioning us.
I spent the next couple of hours just holding her. She cried off and on, but never said another word.
When I try to move, her grip on me tightens. “River,” Seb says softly. “Come here.” She looks over at him and then back at me for a second. He opens his arms for her and I watch her slowly make her way towards him.
His hand goes to the back of her head and he pulls her smaller body into his. I watch them together for a few minutes before I get up from the couch and try to find something that tells me who the fuck did this to her.
Walking towards her room, I see the messy bed and blood again. I want to kill the bastard for even putting his hands on her. Fuck. I run my hands through my hair and take a seat on the edge of her bed. She doesn’t deserve this shit. I should have protected her better. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Just as I’m about to get up, I feel her phone vibrate against my ass.
Grabbing her phone, I turn on the screen and see an unknown number. She has three missed calls from the number and a text message. When I click open the text message, I see something that pisses me off to no end.
It’s a picture of a hand ripping at her clothes. The other hand is on her throat pressing down on it. It looks like she’s struggling to breathe. Her nails are digging into his arms as he holds her down. Grabbing my phone out of my pocket, I dial Trace and tell him to find me all the information on the number.
“I’ll call you back in ten.” He states before he hangs up. I walk out of the room towards where my brother and River are still sitting. He’s whispering in her ear, but I can’t hear the words. Whatever he’s saying is calming her down so I don’t try and ruin that. I want her to feel safe here. Hell, I don’t think I’ll be letting her stay here alone again. I won’t let this bastard come near her again.
“Seb.” I murmur quietly. His head turns towards me, a protective look over his face. I flash him the screen and the rage in his eyes turns murderous. When her head turns towards me, I pocket her phone and walk a little closer. Running my hand down the back of her head, I try to think of something else. I feel like I’ve failed her. I know she won’t think of it that way, but I do. I’ve promised that I would never let anything happen to her since the day I met her.
“We need to get out of here. I don’t want him coming back with her here.” Seb nods his head in agreement. “I’m going to grab her some clothes and shit I know she can’t go anywhere without. We can take her to my place.”
I don’t wait for an answer this time. I walk back into her room and grab her duffle bag, filling it with enough clothes for a few weeks. After that, I move to her bathroom and shove her makeup and shit inside too. By the time I’ve gathered most of the shit she brings with her to my place, I walk back towards the front room to see them both standing up. Her whole body looks uneasy and I hate seeing her like that.
She’s the type of girl to not take any bullshit. She doesn’t care if you don’t like her and she sure as shit doesn’t back down from anything. To see the fear in her eyes right now is gutting. That isn’t the girl I know. She might be in there somewhere, but she’s not the girl standing in front of my brother right now.
“River, you’re going to ride with Seb.” She slightly nods her head and he wraps his arm around her tiny frame.
“Come on babe.” He softly says, leading her towards the front door where she leaves her flip-flops. Once she puts them on, she slowly walks with him towards the bikes. I lock up her place before making my way over to them. I stuff her bag into my saddle bag and watch as Seb gets on his bike before helping her on behind him. “Hold on to me.” His voice is still low and sweet.
Watching the way he is with her right now lets me know that he does care about her. He may say that he’s not going to touch her because of me, but now I know how much he really does care about her.
We make the short ride to my place and I unlock the doors for them. I grab my phone and see my old man’s number on the screen. “Hey pops.” I answer, pushing the doors open and letting them pass me. Seb takes River towards the extra room and I shut the door behind me.
“Who the fuck are you looking into?” he bites out. Trace must have told him about the number I asked him to run. Motherfucker.
I run my hand through my hair and tug at the ends. “Some fucking dick that hurt River.”
“What the fuck do you mean someone hurt your girl?” I sigh. I swear, no matter how many times I tell everyone that River and I are nothing more than friends, no one believes me.
“She’s not my girl.” I groan. I hear the door close softly and I watch as Seb makes his way towards me. “She went out last night and I think she hooked up with someone.” I watch Seb’s eyes darken and a growl erupts from his throat. “He hurt her. She has some scratches and bruising. She isn’t saying anything about what happened. I think she’s in shock. Seb and I brought her to my place where we are keeping an eye on her.”
“Why the fuck isn’t your girl under protection. We told you boys to protect the women and children.” He yells at me.
Seriously, last I checked I was a grown ass fucking adult. I didn’t need my dad telling me how to run my life. “It happened last night or early this morning. The fucker has photos of it. Not sure if he has anything else. He sent the photo to her phone after she didn’t answer his phone calls.” I feel the anger radiating off my brother now.
I hear her gasp and I wince at the sound. Both of our heads turn in River’s direction. She’s pale as a fucking white sheet. Just as her legs are about to give out, Seb makes three long strides towards her and grabs her body, pulling her to him. He whispers something in her ear and she wraps her arms around his neck, squeezing him tight to her.
“I don’t give a fuck what you say, I will find the bastard that hurt her and make him pay.” I growl. My eyes watch as Seb all but carries River back towards my extra bedroom.
“Fine. Let me talk with Cason before I sanction this.” he says quietly. I hear my mom’s voice in the background and I know he’s only getting quiet because she’s in the room.
“Sweetheart is that one of the boys?” She asks near the phone. He grunts out a yes and then her sweet loving voice gets on the phone. “Hey baby boy.” She says like she didn’t just see me a couple days ago.
“Hey mom.” I answer. My eyes never leave the door that they disappeared behind.
“How are you doing?” I know what she’s asking, but I don’t want to answer her. Hell, I’m still not even sure exactly how I’m doing. In reality all I want to do right now is head back over to Spencer’s place. Hell I don’t even care if we fucked; all I really want to do is hold him. Having him in my arms last night and this morning was the first time I’ve ever felt like I was right where I belonged.
“I’m figuring shit out.” I finally answer her.
I can hear her smile in her voice. “I’m glad baby. I just hope you don’t wait too long to find what you’re looking for.”
“I’m working on it mom.” I say with a grin. I instantly think about Spencer and I know that I need to see him tonight. Seb is here with River and I can probably slip out for a few hours without them saying anything.
“I love you baby boy. Can I talk to Seb?”
“He’s with River right now.” I can hear the smile in her voice when she tells me how excited she is to hear that. She’s been hoping they get together ever since I told her I was gay. We say our goodbyes and I promise to bring River over when she’s feeling up to it. When I hang up with her, I send a message to Spencer, telling him that I’m dealing with something, but that I’ll come by later.
Chapter Sixteen