SEAL Forever

by Anne Elizabeth

  “Where does it hurt?” asked the doctor as he pushed on spot after spot.

  “Everywhere,” replied Declan. He was so tired… Too exhausted to do this.

  “What about your legs? Can you wiggle your toes?” The doctor wore glasses and Declan could see his reflection in them. The eyes behind the lenses looked confident, kind, and concerned. “You need to move…”

  Declan felt his heart squeeze as if something were crushing it. His mouth was open, but he couldn’t ask for help.

  “He’s crashing. Hypovolemic shock. Get that blood volume back up. Get the paddles. Move!”

  It was the strangest feeling, hovering over his body, looking down on himself and the doctors and nurses. Had to have been at least six of them working on him. There was so much blood. And someone was keeping pressure on his leg.

  They ripped open his shirt. Laid paddles on his chest.

  “Clear! Clear!”

  The shock sent him back into his own body. Into his pain-ridden, bleeding body, which looked like so much red meat from above. The pity he’d felt was gone. Instead there was a sense of fighting. He wanted it, wanted to live.

  “Got a pulse. It’s steady. Okay, let’s get him to surgery.” The doctor was leaning over him.

  Declan was looking into those bespectacled eyes.

  “Stay with us, Master Chief. We’re going to get you fixed up.”

  Leaning over the side of the bed, Declan grabbed the edges of the mattress and threw up. The entire contents of his stomach purged themselves onto the floor of his bedroom. The image of his body as tattered and torn red meat played over and over in his brain.

  His body shook. Going down, stout tasted great. Coming back up was like barfing acid.

  Seemed like forever before the heaving stopped.

  Opening the nightstand drawer, he withdrew a pack of Extra spearmint gum and shoved two pieces into his mouth. It was ideal to stop the heaves and was a pretty good stopgap until he could get to the bathroom and brush his teeth. Thinking of the bathroom, though, made him have to do other things.

  Why was it that bodily functions wanted to happen all at once?

  He reached for his crutch and knocked the lamp off the nightstand. It crashed to the floor and he ended up in the same place. Just then his bladder let loose, and he started to laugh as relief and pain dueled in his body. In for a penny, in for a pound…

  The balcony light came on. The glass door opened and Maura’s voice was tentative. “Declan, is that you?”

  “Yep! It’s me. I was going to call you in the a.m.” Declan didn’t know if that was true or not. All he knew for sure was that he hated feeling helpless as a baby.

  Lights snapped on in his living room and then in his bedroom. His eyes drank in the sight of her like a thirsty man.

  “Declan? What on earth?” She stood there in a white cotton nightgown and robe, and from this angle, he could see her white panties with a small pink bow on top. She leaned down next to him. “When did you get home? What happened?”

  “A few hours ago. I wanted to get a few winks before I came over and woke you.”

  “Oh.” She bent down beside him. Her fingers touched his face. “What happened? Give me two minutes to call an ambulance.”

  “No,” he said adamantly. “No doctors. No more hospitals. I’m fine.” He had just gotten out; he couldn’t bear to go back.

  “Okay. Don’t move then. Just give me a minute.” She was gone less than a minute. When she came back from the bathroom with wet washcloths and dry towels, she also had his crutch. She didn’t say anything about his leg, merely handed it to him.

  She ran the wet washcloths over his body and then dried him. It was actually sort of nice, better than the experience at the hospital. From this position, his body joined in on the applause.

  “Declan, let’s get you back up on the bed.”

  “First, a side trip to the bathroom to clean up.” He used his arms to pull himself up and onto the bed. Feeling her hands brush gently over his flesh brought a flood of memories. He used the crutches to get to the bathroom. While he rinsed himself off, he realized how starved he was to see her, to touch her and smell her. And he had denied himself that pleasure…why?

  Smiling when she saw him, she propped pillows around him after he lay down. She gave him a glass of water and his toothbrush with toothpaste on it and then tackled the messes on the floor. As he brushed his teeth, he wanted to tell her that she didn’t have to do it, but watching her touched something inside of him.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.

  He pursed his lips and shook his head.

  “By morning it will be better. Why don’t you come over to my place?”

  Surprisingly, he wanted to. He wanted to smell the scent of her on her sheets and towels and wrap his body around her warmth. He pushed away the pillows and covers, grabbed his crutches, and got to his feet. They moved through his apartment slowly and then onto the balcony. The fresh air made his senses feel alive. He breathed deeply for several seconds and then followed Maura into her place.

  “I can sleep on the couch or the floor. I’ve slept worse places.” He really didn’t want to put her out. She’d already gone above and beyond.

  “No way.” Maura stood like a militant nurse. The expression on her face was unreadable, and he would have given just about anything to know what was on her mind.

  As he sat down, the bed sagged under his weight. Stretching out, he felt the cool clean sheets beneath him. Her scent enveloped him and he immediately relaxed.

  Slowly, she lay down next to him. Putting her head on his chest, she hugged him. “I…I missed you.” She stayed like that for a long time.

  He cleared his throat; her tenderness had brought a sudden swell of emotion. “I missed you too.” He stroked her hair and her nightgown-covered back, and then shifted her body so she lay half on top of him. “I’m terrible with words. They get in the way. I’m better at showing.” He kissed her, putting everything he wanted to share with her in that touch of lips.

  A moan escaped her mouth. It was his turn to take his time and explore the beauty of Maura Maxwell, and given her response, this was exactly what she sought.

  Her needs rose to his. She was kissing him back as if he were oxygen. Her hands caressed his skin, playing along the muscles on his chest and stomach and then pulling on his biceps…wanting…asking for him to be on top. As he rolled over, he struck his leg and cried out.

  “Sorry,” she said. “I’m such a disaster.”

  “No,” he said. “You’re not. Come here.” Pulling her on top of him, he settled her so that she couldn’t tweak his leg, and then they began to play. There was no rushing as he cupped and caressed her breasts, first with his hands and fingers and then with his tongue.

  The soft murmurs of pleasure coming from the back of her throat excited him. Her skin was so soft and beckoning, it was hard to keep his hands off of her. As she moved restlessly against him, he lowered his touch to that most tender place between her legs, and finding the rhythm that made her breath race and her body arch made him smile. Again and again he brought her until she was so wet, his fingers were bathed in her essence.

  Then he lifted her again, suspending her body above his.

  She giggled such a purely feminine sound. “You’re so strong. You could probably do bench presses with me all day long.”

  “You’re lighter than my pack.” He grinned. “Uh, do you have a…”

  She nodded and pointed to the drawer next to him.

  The box was sealed. He ripped it open and put on the condom, and then he lifted her back into position and lowered her onto his waiting cock, watching as her eyes went wide and her mouth opened.

  When he was completely inside of her, she sighed. “Declan.”

  Taking his hands from her waist, he said, “I’m
all yours. Do with me what you will.”

  The smile on her lips was wicked. She moved slowly at first, finding her pace.

  He relished the pleasure, something he hadn’t enjoyed for a long, long time. His body was so close, so primed, but he held on, waiting for the moment when her back arched and she cried out.

  “Declan!”

  His name was a call to battle. Grabbing her hips with both hands, he increased the speed, driving himself deeper into her, and then he came. His body shook with the force of the climax. His arms vibrated with effort and he almost dropped her on the bed as he lifted her off. Instead, he managed to tuck her next to his body. God, it was like a marathon.

  Words tumbled unheeded from his mouth. “I was on an Op and it went sideways. One of the explosions caught up to us faster than we realized, and it blew my leg off. I don’t know what it means, if I’ll still be able to be active duty, though I’m pretty sure my operational days are over.” He took a long, slow, deep breath and then let it out. “I’m not ready to face all the emotional baggage that goes along with this, but I do know that I care deeply for you. I thought of you often. I just…didn’t want you to worry…and didn’t know what to say…about this.”

  “You wanted to tell me in person,” she added.

  “Yes.” He hugged her tightly. “Be patient with me.”

  She pushed herself up onto her elbow and looked at him. “Why wouldn’t I? You’re still the same man, the person I was falling for.”

  He grinned. “I thought I was the only one doing the falling.”

  Her fist struck his chest in a playful jab. “Ha, ha. Who wouldn’t fall for you?”

  “Don’t underestimate yourself, Maura. The fact that you’re unaware of your own strength, fortitude, and beauty…you’re a gorgeous woman inside and out. Most of all, your tender heart…touches me.” Declan felt emotions welling up inside. Maybe this was the time to put it out there, what he felt he had to say to her. “Just want you to know. I’m not the only fish out there. You can do better.” He had to give her an out, as much as it hurt him.

  “Declan, I’m not going anywhere. You’re the only one I want.” She leaned down and kissed him, teasing his upper lip until he joined in. “I’ve put away my fishing pole.”

  He nodded, his heart full. She wanted to be with him, even given everything going on. He was speechless.

  He took his time exploring her body and listening to her moans and sighs before he brought her to completion. One thing was for sure, the passion between them had not faded, and neither had Maura’s sweetness.

  Chapter 13

  Hard to think of myself as falling for this guy, and yet I am. Maura blew the suds off of her hands and dried them on a recycled paper towel. Tossing it into the garbage from where she stood, she said, “Two points.”

  It had hardly been twenty-four hours, and she was practically lovesick.

  “Sorry, I didn’t hear you,” he said, patting his lap.

  “Just considering telling the world that you’ve made me a sex addict.” She settled herself instead next to him on the couch. She wanted him naked and available to fulfill her desires 24/7. Is that normal?

  “Welcome to the club.” His arm settled around her shoulders, and she snuggled into his warmth. “They say admitting the problem is the first step to wallowing in it or fixing it. What’s your choice?”

  “Wallow.”

  He grinned at her. “Good choice.” His hands moved under her shirt, rubbing along her spine. “Can I ask you a question?”

  “You just did,” she teased as she rolled her eyes. “I’m kidding. Go ahead.”

  He lifted the back of her shirt and laid a kiss on the scarred flesh of her back. “You never talk about your scars, but you’re obviously comfortable with them. Would you share the experience of how they happened?”

  She nodded her head. She wasn’t scared of showing her scars, not anymore. But she was still uncomfortable talking about them.

  Declan studied her, and then shook his head. “Sorry. If it’s too much…”

  “No.” She patted his hand. “It’s okay. Just give me a minute. I’m comfortable with myself and my body. The scars are part of my life experience. But I, uh, still have difficulty…talking about the accident. It brings me back to that moment like it was yesterday.”

  She took a long, ragged breath and let it out. “Okay. As you know, I began gymnastics at the age of three. I loved tumbling, and the beam—I couldn’t get enough of it and would spend hours and hours practicing. So in middle school, my parents enrolled me in a gym about two hours from our house that was known for its competitive standing and for making great gymnasts. I competed for them throughout high school—my folks made me go to a regular high school so I’d have friends and a regular experience, but I was hardly there and nothing was normal about my life.”

  She shifted in her seat. “It was senior year. I was returning from a gymnastics meet with five friends. We were all piled in there together. None of us were wearing seat belts. We were celebrating, because we’d just slaughtered our nemesis, Knotch—a gym that had turned out two gold medal winners and one bronze—and we were pretty pumped.”

  Maura couldn’t hold his gaze, so she looked at her hands. The memory came to life again as clear and painful as if it were yesterday. “Betsy was driving, and Elizabeth was in the passenger seat. I was behind the driver, Renee was behind the passenger side, and Chassey”—she swallowed the hard lump in her throat as tears welled in her eyes—“Chassey was in the middle seat. I don’t know what happened up front, but our SUV overturned. I can still feel it rolling—over and over. The metal twisted and we were screaming.”

  Wiping tears off her face, she continued. “I must have blacked out, and when I came to, I was pinned and my arm was trapped in the wreckage. A piece of sharp metal had cut into my back and I could feel the blood. But the hardest—” She swallowed and coughed, choking on her anguish. “The hardest part was looking up and seeing Chassey. My best friend’s body was broken, and her face was turned to me. There was no life in her eyes; all of the energy that made her such a firecracker was gone.” She looked up at him, sobbing. God, after all these years, it’s still hard to talk about it.

  “Chassey’s head was next to mine for hours, while the firefighters worked to free me from the wreckage.” She held his gaze as if he were a lifeline. “It was like she was hugging me…holding me…while the skin on my crushed arm died and I lost all feeling in my fingers and hand. And I talked to her. Trying to get her to talk to me, but she wouldn’t. I knew. I knew the truth in my mind, but my heart wouldn’t let go.”

  He reached for her.

  She let him pull her into his arms. She wept. Declan was only the third person, besides her parents and her last boyfriend, she’d told. The potency was always there, in the periphery of her life, waiting to catch her. And she still missed Chassey.

  He kissed her head and rubbed his hand over her back. “I’m here. I’m not letting you go.”

  She wiped her face on her sleeve. “Thanks.”

  “What happened to the other girls?”

  “They lived. But I don’t think any of us were the same. I left gymnastics, because of my arm. I had to go through a bunch of surgeries. They replaced the bone of my arm and I had a bunch of grafts on it and on my back.” She leaned back so she could look at him. “I might not understand exactly what you are going through, but I understand some of it.”

  “I’m glad you shared that story.” His fingers traced the scars on her back. “I like your battle scars. They are part of who you are.”

  “Thanks,” she said. “I never thought of it that way. But I suppose if we live long enough on this planet, only the rare soul is without trauma and pain.” She cuddled closer to him. “Are you going to talk about your experience?”

  He nodded his head slowly. It was time to let the pain out
. He couldn’t hide forever. “Though I’m foggy on some of the details. We had planted several charges, ready to blow the place, but we made a mistake. We didn’t take into account the type of explosives they had in this…uh, bunker.” He sighed. “I’m sorry I can’t be more specific…”

  “That’s okay. I honestly don’t want to know the details that aren’t relevant to you. Please…continue.”

  He gestured with his hand. “So we set the explosives and the timers and got out of there. But the enemy was on our heels, and when the explosives detonated, we were thrown. I couldn’t make a lot of sense of it after that, but all I was worried about was my Team and getting away from the pain. At the hospital, I was able to check in and find out they were okay, and I had to face the fact that I lost my leg.”

  Declan was staring at some far-off spot. “Infections meant more meds and additional surgeries, and when I could finally go home, I didn’t tell anyone. Of course Gich found out—he always does—and met me at the airport and brought me home.”

  “I met him. Gich.” She waved her hand. “It’s a long story, but he walked me home from McP’s. He seems like a good soul.”

  Declan turned his gaze to her. “He is. I’ve known him for my entire career in the Navy. He’s a Sea Daddy to a whole bunch of us.”

  “Interesting term…”

  “Yeah, a combination of mentor, friend, teacher, nemesis, and a few guys add Antichrist into that mix. Gich can be a handful, though he’s one of the best men I know. I trust him with my life, and obviously, now with my lady.” He winked at her and then there was a long pause.

  “You know the story I told you about my accident.” She waited for his nod. “I only told that to one other person besides my parents, and that was my last boyfriend. He told me that I was too clingy and emotional, and he dumped me after that. I wouldn’t do that to someone. I wouldn’t do that to you. I have such strong feelings for you, Declan. As a matter of fact, I think…no, I know that I’m falling in love with you.”

  He drew her head toward his and he kissed her. “Me too.” He placed his forehead on hers.