Dance Into Destiny

by Sherri L. Lewis

  “Yep, this is it,” he said.

  “Oh!” Shara’s eyes widened as the identity of their location dawned on her. “This is your place?”

  “Yep. Come on up. Jenell had all the stuff delivered this week. She has some serious skills when it comes to decorating.”

  They climbed four floors to the top floor apartment.

  “Sorry. The owner is figuring out how much it would cost to put an elevator in.” Quinton opened the door and Shara’s mouth flew open as she walked in.

  The space was huge and open, much like Keeva’s loft. The living area was decorated in earth tones accented with African décor. There was a large television with a lot of electronic equipment attached to it.

  “What’s all this?”

  Quinton pointed at the entertainment center. “DVD, CD player and stereo with surround sound. Oh and a PlayStation for when my boy, Jamil, comes over.” Shara gave him a stern look, but he waved it away. “I know, I know. I spoil him too much.”

  The dining area had a large table with fresh flowers in a vase on it. Two places were set. “We’re dining in? Who’s cooking?”

  “We are—together. I thought it might be fun.”

  Shara walked into the kitchen. It was quite spacious with an island and every kitchen appliance available. “Like gadgets, do we?”

  “I don’t want to hear it. I already told you I was extravagant when it comes to my castle.”

  Shara looked around as if something was missing. “Where’s your bedroom?”

  “Why Sister Shara, I’m appalled that you asked me that.”

  She swatted at him playfully.

  He led her through a door out of the apartment. “It would have cost too much and taken too long to join it all together, so I had them do it as a separate suite.” He opened a door across the hall. They walked into an office with a large desk, computer, and bookshelves lining the walls filled with books. Quinton opened another door to a huge bedroom with a sitting area and a large walk-in closet. His bathroom had a step down Jacuzzi tub and glass shower. A second door led to a guest bedroom and guest bath. The last door was locked.

  “What’s in here?”

  “Another guest room. I can’t find the key.”

  “Quinton, this ain’t no apartment. It’s a house.”

  He led her back to the living area. “Do you like it?”

  Shara smiled and stood on her toes to kiss his cheek. “I love it. It’s beautiful. Definitely worth the wait.”

  They walked into the kitchen.

  “You can do the salad and the bread. Leave everything else to me.” Quinton began pulling vegetables out of the refrigerator.

  “What are we having?”

  “Seafood Alfredo over angel hair pasta, salad, and garlic bread.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “Oh, I almost forgot. I got you something.” He walked back into the living room over to the stereo and pulled out a CD. He handed it to her.

  She gasped. “Fred Hammond has a new CD out? How could I not know that?”

  “What—does he call you before he releases them or something?”

  “Yes, actually,” she joked. “Seriously though, I always know what Fred is up to. He snuck this one in on me.”

  “Well, here’s the skip button on the CD player. Check it out.”

  Shara hugged the CD to her chest. “Oh no—listening to a Fred Hammond CD for the first time is a special experience, not to be shared.”

  Quinton pretended to be hurt. “Is there something going on between you and Fred I should know about?”

  She laughed. “It’s not like that, silly. I just love his music. I like to listen to it and read the words and be with God. His music has helped me overcome many a depressed day. It’s always guaranteed to take you—”

  “Straight to the throne room? I know. It’s like he has this key to a room in heaven with nothing but songs in it, and every time he releases a CD, he opens a door and lets a few of those songs out. The lyrics strike a cord deep in your spirit.”

  Shara stared at him. “It scares me when you—”

  “Say what’s in your head? Yeah, you scare me too when you think what’s in mine.” He kissed her. His lips lingered.

  “Ummmm.” She smiled. “You have the sweetest lips in the world.”

  “Unh uh, you do.” He kissed her again softly.

  “Unh uh, you do.” She kissed him back.

  He pulled away from her and walked back to the kitchen. She put the CD in and followed him, bringing the insert with her.

  Quinton grinned when he heard the first song play. “Oh, so I’m Fred Hammond worthy now?”

  She giggled and hopped up on the counter to sit, turning through the album insert, scanning the songs.

  “What do you think you’re doing? You’re supposed to be making the salad.”

  “You invited me, remember?”

  Quinton scowled, but started chopping a red bell pepper. “Don’t think this is how it’s gonna be when we . . .”

  She lowered the insert and looked at him. “When we what?”

  “. . . when we uh . . . have our next eat-in date.”

  She studied his face for a moment, then said, “I expect the food to be ready when I get here next time. I’m starving.”

  Quinton stood with his mouth open. “You’re something, you know that?”

  “Yep.”

  He pulled a peach out of the refrigerator. “Here, I don’t want you to spoil your appetite, not that that’s possible.”

  “Whatever, Quinton.” Shara pouted.

  He bit his lip. “You shouldn’t pout like that.”

  “Why not?” She poked her lips out even further.

  “Because . . . it makes me want to kiss you.” He walked over and kissed her pouting lips.

  “Is that such a bad thing?” She kissed him back. “Hey, I like sitting up here. I’m as tall as you are.” She put her arms around his shoulders and kissed him again. He pulled away and walked back over to his chopping board, smiling.

  She heard him let out a deep sigh. “What?”

  “Nothing. I like you here in my space. Maybe too much,” Quinton said.

  Shara went back to reading the CD cover as he chopped the vegetables.

  Shara was impressed with Quinton’s culinary skills. After lunch, she helped him clear the dishes and clean the kitchen. “Oh God, I’m stuffed. I think I just committed a sin. You can’t cook like this when we . . .”

  “When we what?” Quinton turned around from the sink.

  “When we . . . uh have our next eat-in date.”

  He stared at her for a minute. She stared back. They both smiled.

  They finished cleaning and went to the living room. Shara plopped down on the leather couch. Quinton sat in the armchair.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Nothing.” He moved over to the couch, but sat at the other end.

  “Hey, I have a CD I want you to hear.” He put on the CD and brought the insert to her.

  “Nancey Jackson, Relationships,” she read.

  “It’s not new, but I don’t think you have it in your collection. The theme of the album is having an intimate relationship with God. I pulled it out the other day and it made me think of you.”

  Shara listened to the lyrics. “Oh, yeah. This is nice. More throne room music.” She closed her eyes. They listened until the first song ended. “Where’s mine?”

  “How do you know I got you one?”

  She pouted again.

  “Don’t start that.” He walked over to the entertainment center and pulled out another copy of the CD.

  “Thanks, Quint.”

  “You’re getting spoiled, you know that?”

  “And whose fault is that?”

  He smiled. “Guilty.”

  Her CD collection had grown exponentially since they’d started seeing each other. He had introduced her to a lot of artists—gospel and jazz. At first she’d felt funny with him buying her thing
s and paying for everything when they went out. When she saw how insulted he got when she mentioned it, she vowed never to bring it up again. She was actually starting to like it.

  When he came back over to the couch, she scooted next to him. He put an arm around her and they listened to the music for a while. She sighed.

  “What was that for?” He glanced down at her.

  “I don’t know. Just feel good I guess. Great atmosphere, great good, good music, comfortable couch . . .”

  “That’s all?”

  “Oh, yeah, the company’s not too bad either.”

  He laughed.

  She turned to kiss him. The kiss became a little more passionate than usual and he pulled himself away from her and walked into the kitchen.

  “Want something to drink? I’m thirsty all of a sudden.”

  She followed him into the kitchen with a questioning look on her face. “Why do you do that?”

  “What?”

  “Run away from me all the time.”

  He looked at her and chuckled. “Ummm, if you have to ask that question, then my suspicions about you must be true.”

  “What suspicions?”

  “Gee. Now I know I’m blessed.” He walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulders and kissed her on the forehead. “I’m the man in this relationship, so I’m responsible for keeping us out of trouble.”

  “Trouble?”

  He looked at her and allowed time for his meaning to register.

  “Ooooohhhhh . . . trouble.”

  “Yeah . . . trouble.”

  She squirmed for a second under his gaze.

  “I promise to, you know, keep things holy, but you have to promise never to kiss me like that again until . . .”

  “Until what?” She traced circles around one of the buttons on his shirt.

  He grabbed her hand. “Shara.” He let out an exasperated breath. “I don’t think you realize the effect you have on me. You can’t—”

  “Stop worrying, silly.” She waved his frustration away. “Nothing’s gonna happen. You love God and I love God.”

  “I know, but . . .”

  “But what?”

  He bit his lower lip. “But I love you, too.”

  Her mouth hung open with a slight smile. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good—’cause I . . . I uh.” She bit her upper lip. “I love you, too.”

  He smiled. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  He kissed her softly and then held her close. They both sighed together and then laughed.

  The phone rang. He looked at the clock and picked up the phone, checking the caller-ID. “What’s up, Jamilly-mil? . . . I ain’t forgot. You my dog, man . . . All right, you get the crew together, I’ll meet you there . . . Chill man, I’ll be there in twenty.” He hung up the phone and walked back over to where Shara was standing. He kissed her on the nose.

  “I could stay here with you all evening, but it’s probably best that I don’t. I promised my boys and—”

  “I know how they are. I’m going to Keeva’s for dinner, anyway. She’s cooking for me, too. Although I’m not sure I can eat another bite.”

  “Yeah, right.”

  She punched him playfully. “Whatever, Quinton.”

  Quinton pulled up in the church parking lot and came around to open the door for Shara. He leaned to kiss her but she pulled away. “The kids are over there.”

  “Oops, my bad.” He helped her down and walked her to her car.

  “See you tomorrow morning?”

  “Yeah.”

  She turned on her car. “Hey!” she called after him as he walked away.

  He turned around.

  “Love you.” Her smile almost broke her face.

  His did too. “Love you, too.”

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  When Shara gave Keeva their usual hello hug, Keeva clung to her.

  “Hey, are you okay?”

  “Yeah, just glad to see you. It’s been forever.” Keeva stepped back without looking Shara in the eye. “I didn’t get a chance to cook yet. Do you want me to order something?”

  “No way. I’m still full from lunch at Quinton’s.”

  “Lunch at Quinton’s?”

  Shara walked over to the couch and plopped down, staring at the ceiling. She blushed as she told Keeva about his apartment and how he had cooked for her.

  Keeva was amused at the dreamy look on Shara’s face when she talked about him.

  Shara’s voice even sounded dreamy. “He told me he loved me.”

  Keeva put her hand over her mouth. “What? Already?”

  Shara gasped. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

  “What?”

  “That large, light reflecting structure that’s weighing down your ring finger that wasn’t there before. Did you forget to mention something important?”

  “Oh, yeah. I just got it back from being sized.” Keeva sighed and plopped down on the couch beside her. “Mark asked me to marry him.”

  Shara studied Keeva’s face. “Isn’t this the part where you’re supposed to blush and tell me excitedly that he proposed, recounting every romantic detail and show me the ring and how beautiful it is and tell me you’re so excited about spending the rest of your life with him?”

  “That would be the scheduled performance for my fake friends. You know better.”

  “So you don’t want to marry him?”

  “Honestly, no.”

  “What did he do when you turned him down?”

  Keeva looked away. “I didn’t.”

  Shara’s eyes bugged out. “No wonder you’ve been avoiding me. Let me get this straight. You told him you would marry him, but you’re sitting here telling me you don’t want to.”

  “Well, I didn’t actually tell him I would marry him, but that’s about the gist of it.”

  “Keeva, don’t you think he should be the one you oughta be telling that you don’t want to get married?”

  “I know.”

  “And?”

  “I don’t know what happened. I wasn’t expecting it and he was there and he looked so earnest and so serious and I just . . . I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so I sorta said yes. And then we made love—well, had sex—so that didn’t seem like an appropriate time to tell him and then he left to go out of town and then he got back and has been so excited . . . I haven’t found the right moment to tell him.”

  “Keeva! You—”

  “I know, Shara. I know I’m not being true to myself. I know I’m putting another person’s feelings before mine. I know this is your proverbial box you want to let me out of. I know I can’t marry him or I’ll be miserable for the rest of my life. I know I can’t live a lie and that marriage is a very serious thing. I know he’s not my soulmate and I know if I marry him, it’ll be the worst thing I could have ever done.” She paused to take a breath. “Now, what did you want to say?”

  “That pretty much covers it.” Shara looked her in the eye. “Soooo . . . ?”

  “I don’t know Shara. Do you always have to be in my face about something?” Keeva snapped.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. I guess you’d rather me be like Jade.” Shara changed her voice to a high-pitched, valley-girl tone. “Like, ohmigod, Keeva, he proposed? That’s so exciting. I’m so happy for you. Ooooh, look at your ring. How many carats is it? I can’t wait to be a bridesmaid. Ooooh, what color dresses are we going to have? Girl, you are so lucky. Mark is sooooo wonderful. I wish I had a man just like him.” Shara put her hands on her hips. “Was that better? Is that what you want? I don’t think so, or Jade would be standing in your living room instead of me.”

  Keeva clenched her teeth and balled up her fists like she was about to go off on Shara and then burst into tears.

  Shara put her arms around her. “I’m sorry, Keeva. I didn’t mean all that.”

  “Yes, you did.” Keeva wiped her eyes. “And you’re right. That’s precisely why I invited you over. I n
eeded someone with some sense to talk some sense into me.”

  Keeva pulled her hair. “I don’t know what to do. I’ve thought of a million ways to tell him. I wish I could write him a letter and mail him his ring in a box. I don’t want to see his face when I tell him.”

  She stared off into space. “I know I can’t marry him, but I am gonna miss him, you know? Even though he’s no good for me, he’s still . . . there. What if I end up like Jade and Heather and all my other hard-up girlfriends who all live in fear that they’ll never get married? But then, I know I’d rather be by myself than be in a miserable marriage. As unhappy as I’ve been with him though, I didn’t expect this to hurt so bad.”

  “What?”

  “Breaking up with him. It’s not like you say, ‘I’m not gonna marry you’ and then go back to being girlfriend and boyfriend. When I give him his ring back, that’s it. It’s over.” She sighed. “For the past three years, this was the man I was going to marry. Now all of a sudden, he won’t be in my life anymore. Three years is a long time to all of a sudden be over and done with. And I do sort of love him in a weird sort of way. It’s not like you can throw those feelings away overnight.”

  She paused for a minute. “I wonder why he asked me to marry him now. We had always planned to get married after I finished graduate school. I can’t help but think it’s the sex thing. Since we’re engaged, he figures he doesn’t have to go home at night anymore. He’s also been hinting that since I have to plan the wedding, I won’t have time to teach the dance classes anymore. It’s more of his control, keeping me in his box.”

  Shara listened and allowed Keeva to reason with herself.

  “I’m gonna miss him, though. I guess I can see why women get a rebound man. You need someone to fill that hole left behind. I don’t want to do that, though. I want to be able to fill that hole with me. Really get to know me and spend time with me and love me. Does that make sense?”

  Shara nodded.

  “And I guess I also want to try to develop, you know . . . a relationship with God. If I can find Him and learn to talk to Him and hear from Him, I know He’ll help fill the hole, too.”

  Shara nodded again, not wanting to interrupt Keeva’s introspection.

  “So, I guess it’s settled. I’m not marrying Mark. I’m gonna marry me instead. And God . . .” She smiled, nodding her head, as if she was satisfied with her decision.