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Apache-Colton Series

Page 83

by Janis Reams Hudson

As various possibilities came to mind, Matt squeezed his hand around a chicken bone. The chicken bone snapped in two.

  Kali bit back another grin. His sister, indeed. Kali would bet good money that with the close living arrangements, isolated out here away from town, and Serena’s having to take care of Matt, the two were starting to forget whose mother was married to whose father.

  By the time Caleb and Serena returned to the clearing Matt was ready to explode. It didn’t help his mood one damn bit to see Serena’s hand casually grasping the inside of Caleb’s elbow, or the teasing smile she flashed her escort.

  With her free hand, she patted Caleb’s shoulder. “Just keep walking,” she said cheerfully. “I told you there was nothing to worry about.”

  Only then did Matt notice the peculiar look on Caleb’s face. Tense, wary. Lips thinned and white. Beads of sweat along his brow and temples.

  “Matt,” Serena called. “You have a visitor.”

  Matt cocked his head and realized there was too much shuffling and crunching of gravel for the footsteps of only Serena and Caleb. Behind the two, a dark shape rustled out of the brush. Matt grinned. “Hello, shash.”

  The young brown bear on all fours following Caleb and Serena gave a snort and grunt.

  Caleb flinched.

  “It’s all right,” Serena crooned. “It’s just here to see Matt.”

  Matt threw back his head and laughed until his sides ached. Once he calmed, he eyed Serena’s escort. “How’d you like your chaperon, Caleb?”

  “Call it off, Matt,” Serena said. Her eyes shot fire at him.

  Matt laughed harder.

  “It’s not funny. Get rid of the damn bear.”

  Beside Matt, Kali made a strangling sound. “I’ve heard about if for years,” she said in awe, “but I never believed it.”

  “Believe it,” Serena said with disgust. “Everywhere Matt goes, a bear shows up.” To Caleb, she said, “Not to harm anyone, unless they threaten Matt. Since the time he killed a bear when he was fifteen, they follow him all over. The old shaman calls them Matt’s guardians.”

  The bear shuffled past a petrified Caleb and an irritated Serena and sniffed Matt’s shoulder.

  “Good shash,” Matt said. “Thank you. Now go on. Núúghuyáhah.”

  As if understanding Matt’s command, the bear gave a final sniff, then turned and lumbered off over the hill.

  Caleb swallowed, then visibly relaxed. “I’ve shot a bear or two, but I never had one follow me around like a tame dog.”

  Serena gave Caleb’s arm a last pat, then turned loose of him. “Matt didn’t shoot his bear. It attacked him when he was trapped in a rock slide. All Matt had was a knife.”

  If Matt didn’t know she was madder than hell at him, he would have sworn her voice held a hint of pride.

  Chapter Eight

  “That was nice,” Serena said, watching the buggy carry Caleb and Kali back to town.

  Matt ground his teeth. Nice? Nice? He swung around to face her. “I’ll just bet it was.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Didn’t your mother ever tell you what can happen when you tease a man like that?”

  “Tease?” she shrieked. “I did no—”

  “You had him wrapped right around your little finger. Every time you batted those big blue eyes, he practically drooled.”

  “You’re crazy.”

  “You’re the one who’s crazy, Serena, leading on a cheap tinhorn like that.” He took a step toward her. “Haven’t you got any sense at all?”

  Serena held her ground. With hands on hips, she glared up at him. “Why is it you only call me Serena when you’re angry?”

  “A man like him expects to get all that’s offered to him. From where I sat, you offered him plenty.”

  “I did no such thing, and you know it. What’s the matter with you, anyway?”

  “Me?” he cried. “What the hell’s the matter with you?”

  “There’s nothing in the world the matter with me. Just because you see a skinny little kid with pigtails when you look at me doesn’t mean everybody else does. Caleb happens to think I’m a lovely young woman.”

  Matt swung a step closer. “Did he say that?”

  “As a matter of fact, he did.”

  “He’s faster than I gave him credit for. He’s already started with his line of sweet little lies.”

  Serena narrowed her eyes and clenched her jaw. “Lies?” she ground out. “Lies, you say?” she advanced until she stood nose to nose with him. “Not too many days ago, brother, you called me beautiful. Were you lying, or is it only other men who lie? Make up your mind, Matt. You can’t have it both ways.” She turned and took a step toward the house.

  “Wait.” Matt grabbed for her. She spun away and he missed. “Rena, wait.”

  She glared at him over her shoulder. “What now?”

  He cleared his throat nervously, looked down at the ground, then back up. “We…need to talk.”

  She studied him a moment, then said in a lifeless voice, “It appears to me we’ve both said enough.” She turned away and walked off into the hills. Again.

  When had she become such a coward, she wondered. This was her second trek through the brush today. She couldn’t keep running away like this. But what was she supposed to say to him? It’s all right, Matt, I’ll be your little sister?

  No. She couldn’t do that. She could never be his sister again after the night of the storm. She remembered every vivid detail of that night, from the shock of his icy skin against her when she crawled beneath his blanket, to that last scorching kiss before he pulled away in horror.

  She remembered the way his tongue, firm and hot and sleek, had searched out the hidden corners of her mouth and stroked her own tongue to life until the two danced together to the beat of some inner, unknown rhythm.

  And his hands, rough and calloused, had set her skin on fire with their heated touch.

  She remembered the exquisite sensations his lips created when they surrounded the tip of her breast. She’d been more than half asleep at the time, but she remembered.

  The mere thought of his touch turned both nipples to hard nubs that stood out like pebbles against the soft worn cotton of her shirt. Liquid heat pooled in that secret place between her legs. Her knees turned weak.

  Oh, Matt.

  She sucked her lower lip between her teeth and tried to force away the ache of wanting him. So this was what it was like to want a man. The terrible craving for his touch swirled around her and settled in the pit of her stomach like a rock. A hot, heavy rock.

  Wanting him was madness, and she had to stop. Matt would never feel the way she did. To him she was a little sister, whether she wanted to be or not, and there didn’t seem to be a whole lot she could do about it.

  Tempt him, Kali had said. Make him want you.

  How?

  Serena didn’t know the first thing about how to entice a man. Even if she did, she knew she couldn’t do it. If she succeeded in making Matt want her, it would destroy him. He already carried so much guilt, about Angela’s death, about leaving his daughter and family, about his drinking. Serena just couldn’t add to that.

  And his wanting her would add to it. He would feel so guilty for wanting his sister, it would tear him apart.

  Tearing him apart was the last thing in the world she wanted. She wanted to see him whole and happy again. She wanted to hear him laugh and see the flecks of gold sparkle in his coffee-brown eyes. She wanted to hear him whistle between curses while he worked with the horses at the ranch. She wanted to see the pride in his eyes as he watched his daughter grow up.

  His happiness was her happiness. Her needs were nothing compared to his. His biggest need was someone to love. He needed a wife. Matt wasn’t meant to live alone, even in the midst of a large family. He had such a loving, giving nature, he would shrivel up and die without someone to spend it on.

  Serena wondered if she had the strength to slip back into the r
oll of sister and watch him someday take a wife. And someday he would, she knew.

  No. She wasn’t that strong. It was one thing to be ten years old and watch him marry Angela. But now, when she knew the feel of his lips and the touch of his hands…No. She knew most of her own strengths and weaknesses, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to stand it.

  Nonsense, an inner voice cried. You can stand whatever you have to. If you love him as much as you think you do, as much as you say you do, his happiness is more important than yours.

  Serena wrapped her arms around the trunk of a cottonwood near the creek and pressed her face against the rough bark. “What am I going to do?” she moaned. Tears stung her eyes and flowed down her cheeks unheeded. “Is it true? Can only one of us ever be happy? Oh Matt, I love you.”

  Angry now, she pushed herself away from the tree and wiped her sleeve across her face. This wasn’t getting her anywhere. The first thing she had to do was make some sort of peace with Matt. They couldn’t go on snapping at each other this way.

  She hesitated by the tree and decided that making peace with Matt was the second thing she had to do. The first was, she had to sit down a minute and rest. She was used to all manner of physical activity, but not this constant emotional strain. Her argument with Matt this morning, then having to be nice to Caleb when all she wanted to do was hit something—how dare Matt accuse her of teasing Caleb—then another argument with Matt…She felt drained.

  Matt leaned on his crutches and watched Serena run off—again. Damn. Couldn’t that girl stand still and finish a discussion without running off to hide all the time? He closed his eyes in frustration.

  Actually, he didn’t really blame her for running out. If he hadn’t been hampered by his damned crutches, he might have tried it himself a time or two. As a matter of fact, he did do it himself once, the night of the storm.

  At the reminder of that night, he swore. Even now the thought of her silky skin, her warm, responsive body and her willing lips sent his blood soaring and caused a tightness below his belt.

  You bastard. She’s your sister.

  Is she?

  Yes, damn you.

  He swore again, then stumped his way into the house to get out of the sun. That’s what it was—too much sun. That’s why he was able to forget for long moments just who she was.

  The crutches made a thumping noise against the plank flooring. He paced back and forth, thump, step, thump, step. In another week or so the damned leg would be healed and he could get the hell out of there and away from her.

  Only, if he went home, she’d be there.

  He paced back and forth until he rubbed blisters under his arms, but gradually he began to calm. What had possessed him to yell at her that way about Caleb? He knew she hadn’t encouraged the man. She’d barely looked at him, except when the two of them had gone for a walk.

  What did they do out there in the hills for so long? Talk? Laugh? Hold hands? Kiss?

  A shudder ran through him at the thought of another man tasting those sweet lips, teaching her how to kiss and please him.

  Matt managed to convince himself for a few minutes that the only reason that thought disturbed him so much was because of the brotherly protectiveness he felt for her.

  Serena was a young girl on the verge of womanhood, already in possession of a woman’s body. She had no idea of the effect she had on men, the power she could wield if she only knew how.

  Matt glanced out the open doorway toward the path Serena had taken and was startled to see the sky turning dark. The sun was down and the light was almost gone. Where was she? In another few minutes she wouldn’t be able to see to find her way home. Was she lost? Hurt?

  Serena wouldn’t get lost. He knew better than that. She knew more about how to survive on her own than most men. Cochise, and he, himself, had seen to that.

  Something must have happened to her. Suddenly frantic, he lit the lantern, tossed one crutch aside so he could carry the lantern, and took off as fast as he could into the hills.

  “Serena!” he called. “Rena? Answer me! Where are you?”

  If she was sitting on a rock somewhere still sulking, he would wring her neck for scaring him this way. Yet even as he felt his anger swell, he hoped to God she was sitting on a rock somewhere nearby. It was so much better than the alternatives that haunted his mind.

  It was almost full dark when he found her near the creek, curled up in a ball at the base of a cottonwood. “Rena!” He nearly tore the ground up with his crutch getting to her. “Rena!”

  Dear God, please let her be all right.

  Matt flung his crutch aside and dropped to the ground in front of her, holding the lantern high to look for injuries. He reached out a trembling hand and smoothed the hair back from her face. Thank God she was still breathing.

  Serena nuzzled her face into the palm of his hand. “Matt,” she whispered.

  “Rena, where are you hurt?”

  “Matt?” her eyelids fluttered, then she gazed up at him in confusion. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

  Matt ran his hands down her arms and legs. “Is it your head?” he asked. “Did you hit your head?”

  She blinked slowly. “What are you talking about?” she stretched her arms above her head and yawned, then her eyes opened wide. “Oh. Good heavens. I must have fallen asleep.”

  “What?” Matt roared, raising up on his knees to tower over her. “You mean I’ve been pacing the floor for hours, wondering where the hell you were, and you’ve been asleep? Thinking you were so mad at me you just took off and left without a word, and you’ve been asleep? I rubbed blisters in my goddamn armpit rushing out here to save you from Lord knows what kind of disaster, and you’ve been ASLEEP?”

  Serena blinked again, amazed by his outburst. “You really thought I’d just leave, without telling you?”

  “You scared ten years off my life, woman. I oughtta turn you over my knee and blister your rear.”

  “There you go again,” Serena said wearily. “First you call me a woman, then you threaten to treat me like a child.”

  “Rena, so help me—”

  “I’m sorry.” She placed her fingers over his lips and had to ignore the rush of heat caused by the simple contact. “Both for what I just said, and for worrying you. Don’t be angry, Matt, please. I hate it when we fight.”

  Matt slumped down against the tree near Serena’s head and took several deep breaths. She sat up beside him and he took her hand in his. “I hate it, too,” he confessed. “I’m sorry I yelled. I seem to be doing a lot of that lately. But I was worried when you didn’t come back.”

  Serena leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”

  “For what?” he asked, startled by the kiss.

  “For worrying about me. For coming to find me.”

  He had a peculiar look on his face when he answered, “Isn’t that what big brothers are for?”

  Her smile was only slightly unsteady when she replied, “Right.”

  The next few days were calmer than the ones up to and including the day of the picnic. The easy, comfortable camaraderie, which they’d shared before the storm, was missing, but neither of them mentioned it. On the surface, everything was smooth.

  They went through their daily routines carefully, deliberately. On the outside, everything was normal. But Matt did not ask her to shave him, and she didn’t offer. When she served a meal, she placed his plate on the table rather than handing it to him. When he saw the tired slump of her shoulders at the end of the day, he wanted to massage them, but didn’t offer.

  Beneath the surface, tensions ran high. The hot, dry days and the too warm nights contributed to Matt’s edginess, an edginess he did his best to conceal.

  Serena was so wrapped up in her own misery she wouldn’t have noticed anyway. She concentrated all her energies on being friendly and polite, and talking only about safe subjects like the weather or what to fix for supper. Inside she was so miserable it was a real effort to keep from cry
ing.

  If only she hadn’t fallen asleep that night she’d warmed his cold flesh with her body, they wouldn’t now be acting like polite strangers. She might have been able to go on indefinitely with her girlish longings tucked safely away in her heart.

  She sighed heavily. She’d been doing a lot of that lately…sighing. She tossed down the shirt she’d been mending and wiped the perspiration from her brow. It was too hot to work, especially indoors. Not a breath of air stirred in the tiny house, but outside there was at least a breeze.

  After telling Matt she was going for a walk, she headed for the creek. When she got there, the water proved to be too much of a temptation. As heedless as a child, she tossed her clothes over the nearest bush and spent the next hour lying in the knee-deep water.

  She faced the sky, with her feet against a small boulder and her head pointing up stream. The slow-moving water caressed her from head to toe as it passed on its way through the hills to the San Pedro, a lover stroking her, bidding her farewell.

  The water buoyed her as it swept around and beneath her. It parted at the top of her head and swirled around her, taking turns with the sun and the air at teasing and touching her breasts and stomach and thighs bobbing in and out of the water.

  And that’s how Matt found her.

  It had been lonely at the house without her, and seemed twice as hot after she left. He’d left his shirt draped on a bush and headed toward the stream, expecting to catch her dangling her toes in the water.

  The first thing he saw was her clothes—all of them—scattered on the bushes. Instantly he had turned to leave, not wanting to impose.

  Not much, you lowlife bastard.

  He turned, intending to go, and there she was, stretched out in the water, eyes closed, body laid out for all the world to see—for him to see.

  His mouth went dry and his arms refused to move the crutches. He drank in every inch of her skin greedily. When his gaze finally reached her face, the breath left his lungs. She was watching him.

  Serena blinked slowly, at first doubting what she saw. Matt stood on the bank, devouring her with his gaze. She might not be an experienced woman of the world, but she knew a look of hunger when she saw it. She couldn’t have moved just then if her life depended on it.

 

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