Life Beyond the Temple

by Nikolai Joslin

  And suddenly, it hit me. Regan was someone I wanted to be with, and she acted like she wanted to be with me too. Unfortunately, it hit drunk me, so I did something I would have never done on my own. Alcohol and its dumb ideas.

  I watched her go upstairs, and I stumbled off my chair.

  “What are you doing?” Cam asked. She looked like she was going to get up and help me, but I didn’t need help. I could do this all on my own. At least that’s what the alcohol said.

  “I’m going to see Regan.” I leaned forward and whispered, my words slurring slightly, “I’m going to kiss her.”

  Her eyes flashed with something, but I couldn’t pick out what it was. There were too many Cams to really focus on and pull apart what she was looking at me like. “Casey, don’t. Not now. Wait until tomorrow.”

  “I can’t.” I couldn’t figure out how I had waited this long. Necromancer or not, I liked her, and alcohol was coming up with ideas that I didn’t feel like saying no to.

  She just sighed, and I saw her shoulders slump slightly. “I’ll see you soon,” she said quietly.

  “Tomorrow at one for class,” I said with a drunken smile and made my way to the stairs.

  I pulled myself up the stairs using the handrail and made it to our room and unlocked the door and opened it surprisingly quietly for drunk me.

  What I saw sobered me up very quickly. Meghan and Regan were on the other side of the room with the lights off. They weren’t facing me; they probably didn’t even know I was here. That wasn’t what washed the alcohol from my brain, though; it was Meghan’s low voice.

  “I’ve really missed you, Regan.”

  “I missed you too.” They sounded so… emotional. What was this? A soap opera?

  “Regan… I don’t think you understand….” Meghan’s arms slowly slid around Regan’s neck, and I felt my throat close and had the sudden urge to throw up. “Regan, I love you. Ever since we were kids, and then those letters, and now… now you’re here. Regan, I’m in love with you.”

  “Meghan, I—” Regan’s voice was quiet, and that’s when I found my voice.

  “I’m sorry,” I choked out, fighting back the tears threatening to fall.

  I turned and ran out the open door and down the stairs. I could hear Regan shout, “Casey! Wait!” but I couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything. I just ran.

  I hit something hard as I raced down the stairs. That hard thing was Ston. He looked down at me with his eyebrows knit together. “What’s wrong?”

  This was too much right now; I couldn’t tell him what had happened. “I need to go for a walk,” I managed to say before tearing away from him and racing out of the hotel and into the night air.

  I ran for what felt like ages before I finally came to the warehouse. I couldn’t get the door open. It was stuck or something, so I decided to punch through one of the windows. I didn’t even notice the blood or the glass. I just climbed through and ran to the top of the stairs and broke through the door.

  All I could do was stand there, gasping and sobbing and crying for what could have been minutes or hours. I didn’t know anymore. I wasn’t sure if I was light-headed from crying or blood loss. I wasn’t sure of anything actually.

  I heard the stairs creak, and I turned around to see spiked blonde hair and sad ice blue eyes. “Hey,” Cam whispered.

  “Sh-she—” I couldn’t even finish it before I started sobbing even harder.

  Cam walked up to me and pulled me into a tight hug. She didn’t say anything. She just held me there. And when she was done, she took my hand and sighed at the sight. “Broke the window?”

  I nodded because I couldn’t speak anymore.

  She tilted my chin up to look into her eyes and said, “This will hurt.” And the second she finished the sentence she yanked out a few inches of glass that I didn’t know had embedded itself into the space between my knuckles. I cried out, and she just ran her hand over the back of mine.

  I could feel her healing my hand while she hummed a little tune quietly. My sobs quieted themselves down to sniffles, and I finally asked, “What were you humming?”

  “My mother used to sing to me when I got hurt. I can’t remember the words anymore, but I remember the tune. She had a beautiful voice.” Cam’s voice was calm as she finished healing my hand and held it up for inspection. “You’ll be alright.”

  “No I won’t.” I wasn’t sure if the alcohol came back to say that or if I said that. I reached into my pocket and withdrew what the boy’s mother had given me, finally taking a look at it. It was a gold bracelet. It was small and had little rubies along it.

  “You will.” She looked into my eyes for a moment and then slipped her hand into her jacket pocket. “I’ll leave you alone now, but you’ll be okay. Go back to the hotel sometime. At least go tomorrow morning.” Cam glanced at the bracelet resting in my palm, and in the center of it, she placed a small purple flower. It looked like it had been in her pocket all day.

  That was probably what she had been fiddling with earlier.

  “I was going to give it to you earlier, but then the whole fire thing, and then I got you drunk. I never really found a good time to give it to you. Now is a terrible time, but I’m starting to see that there are no good times around you, just times I want to be with you.” Cam gave me a sad smile and disappeared down the stairs, leaving me to look at the small purple flower.

  I was in a soap opera.

  Chapter 8

  I AWOKE to the blinding sun and a pounding in my head. I sat up and held my head in my hands while I groaned. It had been the best and worst sleep of my life. On one hand, I slept on a metal roof that creaked suspiciously, outside, crying over Regan, trying to figure Cam out, and wishing I was back at the Temple. On the other hand, I didn’t have a nightmare, and I didn’t have to sleep in Regan’s arms when I was like this.

  For about twenty minutes, I sat on the roof, thinking about what I should do next. I knew I had to go back to the hotel soon. Regan was probably worried. She was always worried. I also had to talk to her about the necromancer.

  I shook my head in disbelief. I was so worried and upset about Regan and Meghan when I had a necromancer on my hands? I vowed not to drink again, or at least not when I have more important things to do.

  I walked down the stairs and stopped at the window I had broken last night. I hadn’t even noticed any pain until Cam came. I looked down at my hand and saw a pale pink scar in between my middle finger and ring finger knuckles. It was about two and a half inches long. How had I not noticed it when it happened?

  Right, emotional crisis.

  I scoffed at myself and turned to the door, which was left ajar. Cam probably didn’t want me breaking any more windows. I think she got worried too sometimes, but she trusted I could handle myself most of the time.

  The walk to the hotel seemed short, and I wasn’t ready to go inside when I got there. I took a deep breath and pushed the door open. The lobby had a few dark elves milling about, including Ston, who was leaning against a wall, watching the door. His eyes locked onto mine and suddenly I felt like a guilty child.

  “She’s been out there all night looking for you. She hasn’t come back yet,” he informed me as he glared down.

  I shifted my weight back and forth and dropped my eyes to the ground. “I needed some space.”

  “You didn’t come back. She’s been worried sick. She’s been running around the city looking for you. I was out there with her until a couple of hours ago when she told me to come back just in case you returned. She would’ve used the wolf, but he wouldn’t have anything to do with her. He was howling all night, like he was in pain. He wouldn’t let anyone get near him but that damn Cameron girl. Only she could calm him down for a bit. And Cam refused to help. She came back saying something about you needed to be left alone. I thought Regan was going to beat the answers out of her at one point.”

  “Where is he?” Cinder felt what I felt. He knew the pain I had been in last night, and what
ever it was that I was feeling now. I needed to see him.

  “You should be asking about Regan.” He sighed, pointed up the stairs, and said, “Up in your room.”

  “Thank you,” I said and ran up the stairs. I threw open the door to see Cinder lying on the floor in front of the door.

  The moment he saw me he jumped up and ran to me. He pressed his head against my leg. I hate her. His voice whimpered in my head.

  Don’t. We can’t hate everyone who has more important things than us.

  She hurt you.

  It’s fine, Cinder, really. I’ll be okay.

  It hurt. I felt like I was being torn apart. He whimpered quietly, and I lowered my hand to scratch his head.

  I know.

  I sighed and grabbed some clean clothes. I would have to wash the dirty ones later so I would have something to wear, but that could wait. I went into the bathroom and turned on the water to take a shower. I spent most of it thinking about Regan. I wasn’t sure what I wanted her to say when I saw her again. I wasn’t sure if I wanted her to tell me nothing happened and that she wanted me or if I wanted her to act like nothing happened.

  I didn’t want what I wanted last night. I didn’t want to kiss her. I didn’t want anything like that with her. She hurt me, and I wasn’t ready to go back to normal. I wanted to be mad. I was so angry and in pain, I didn’t want to wind up in her arms tonight or have her stand so close to me that I could feel her warm breath. I didn’t want butterflies when she touched me, and I hated those eyes more than anything else in the world right now. I just wanted to be alone.

  I stepped out of the shower and dried myself off. I pulled on my clothes and brushed my teeth before walking out of the little bathroom. I walked over and sat on the bed Cinder always occupied. It didn’t seem right to sit on the one Regan and I used. I didn’t want to sleep with her anymore.

  Cinder hopped up onto it and lay down. He rested his head on my lap, and I rubbed his back slowly. We didn’t talk again. We just sat there. Cinder had been in pain last night too. This connection between us was stronger than I thought it was.

  The door open, and I looked up to see Regan standing there with her eyes wide. There were dark circles under her eyes, but she didn’t look tired. She looked shocked but relieved. “Case….” Her voice sounded hoarse.

  Cinder got off the bed and stood between me and Regan. He growled and bared his teeth at her.

  “Calm down, Cinder. It’s fine.” I stood up and walked over to the window. I probably sounded cold, but I didn’t mind. In fact, I wanted to be cold. I wanted to distance myself from her.

  He padded after me but watched Regan closely.

  “Case, it’s not what you think. I don’t—”

  “It doesn’t matter.” I didn’t want to talk about it. I wanted to forget it. “There are more important things than what I walked in on last night. I was a little drunk, and I was going to go to bed. I thought you would want some alone time, so I left. End of story. Let’s move on.” I didn’t even look at her; I thought I would break if I did.

  She didn’t say anything, but Cinder grew tense, so I assumed she was walking toward me. She ignored Cinder’s snarl, but I hushed him anyways. It was my turn to go stiff when she touched my shoulder. “Casey….”

  “I said I don’t want to talk about it,” I repeated firmly.

  She turned me around and pulled me into a tight hug. I just stood there in her arms, not hugging her back. “I was so worried,” she whispered. “Meghan is just a friend. I didn’t need alone time. And I didn’t want you to leave.” I could feel her breath on me, and I hated how that made me feel. I felt goose bumps on my neck, and I felt sparks where she touched me. I hated that.

  I pulled away from her. “I said I didn’t want to talk about it. I don’t care what Meghan is to you, but it’s going to have to wait. We have a necromancer to deal with.” I was fiddling with the bracelet on my wrist, the one the woman had given me. “There was a fire yesterday. I was going to tell you last night, but I didn’t have time. Green flames. Magical, can’t be put out by water. The necromancer was at the top of the building. Sent me a note about how the game was just beginning. He knows we’re after him. We have to be on our guard now.”

  Regan nodded, but I think there was a faint amount of hurt in her eyes. I wasn’t sure if I felt guilty for that or not. I wanted her to hurt like I did, but I didn’t want to be what hurt her. I pushed the thoughts aside; I had more important things to think about than this. “Don’t go out alone again. At least take Cinder. If you took Cinder and Ston, I’d feel a lot better. Even Cam would make me feel better. Don’t go out alone. I don’t know what I’d do if you died.”

  I shoved my hands in my pockets and started walking to the door, Cinder following me closely. “You’d go home. I’m going to help Cam with her magic. We didn’t get anything done yesterday. I’ll see you tonight.”

  I didn’t wait for her answer. I opened the door and walked out. I wandered down the hall for a bit, then realized I didn’t know which one was Cam’s. She had always found me. “Cinder, which one is Cam’s?” I whispered.

  He trotted ahead of me and stopped at the second to last door on the left. He sat down in front of it, and I smiled as I knocked on the door. It took a couple moments, but finally the door opened. Cam stood in front of me, her short blonde hair dripping and her ice blue eyes looking at me. She smiled and opened the door a little wider for me. She was wearing a blue tank top and a pair of khaki shorts. “I didn’t expect to see you for a while. I thought you would be talking with Regan. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad to see you.” She stepped back to let me in.

  “You’re wet.” Look at me, stating the obvious. Brilliant.

  “I’m actually just dripping with good looks.” She smirked and then said, “So, are you coming in?”

  I stepped in, and she waited until Cinder was inside to shut the door again. She grabbed a towel from the back of the chair, and I watched her dry her hair. It reminded me of how you dry a dog. When she finished and looked up at me, she shook her head back and forth a few times. “What was that?”

  “My hair.” She chuckled when I just stared blankly at her. “If I don’t do that, it’ll dry standing up like that. I’d rather not have a bad hair day with you here.” She hung her towel up in the bathroom and sat on one of the beds. Her room was pretty much the same as mine, and Cinder had already decided to lie down on one of the beds. “Not to sound unhappy, but why are you here?”

  “I thought we should get to magic training. I only have two more days to convince you to stick around, and we didn’t really get a chance to do anything yesterday. I thought we’d start early.” I shrugged.

  “Alright, I guess we could do that and get some lunch or something.”

  “Sounds like a plan.” I turned around and opened the door again. “Cinder, come on.” I gave my leg a few pats, and Cinder jumped off the bed and followed Cam and me out into the hall.

  Cam locked the door and slid her hands into her pockets. She smiled at me and said, “Well, let’s get going. I want to build control, maybe then I can stop pissing off Regan, no matter how fun it is.”

  “Why do you enjoy pissing her off so much?” We were walking slowly. It’s not like we didn’t have time.

  She looked over at me and cocked her head to the side. “Jeez, how oblivious are you exactly?”

  I frowned. “Thanks for being so nice to me,” I said sarcastically.

  “Sorry, but you just haven’t noticed anything that’s been going on around you. You like Regan, and no matter what you think, she cares about you. I’m jealous of her.”

  What do I say to that? Was that her admitting she liked me? I guess I had noticed. She was different around me, and last night with the flower…. She seemed to care I guess. What did I feel for Cam? What about Regan? I was hurt, sure, but I don’t know what that would mean in a few days.

  I opened my mouth to say something, but Cam just cut me off. “Don’t say anything.
Regan’s a great girl, and you guys are good together.” She stopped and turned to look at me. I was looking up at her sad blue eyes and the ghost of a smile. She put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it gently. “You guys will get through this.”

  “You saw her go up with Meghan last night, didn’t you?” I remembered how she had tried to stop me from going up to see Regan, and I wondered if it was because of her feelings or because of Meghan.

  “I tried to stop you. I could see how Meghan felt about Regan, the way she was hanging off her and looking at her with googly eyes. I knew that it was probably a bad time for you to go up there, especially because you wanted to kiss her.” Her hand fell, and she started walking away again.

  Cam really cared about me. She never pushed me, and she was there when I needed her. She didn’t expect anything from me. She didn’t expect me to want her back or anything; she just cared. This whole new world was crazy and new to me. Emotions and confusion and money and everything else. This was all insane. I wasn’t really sure I was ready for this anymore.

  Ston waited at the bottom of the stairs. “Did you talk to Regan?”

  “Yeah. Did you let her know I was here?”

  “I didn’t think she should be looking for you for another day and a half before she found out.” The dark elf looked down at the ground. “She ran after you. About a minute after you came down, she came down. She yelled at blondie asking where you were, and she was freaking out.”

  I don’t know why, but that made me a little mad. She didn’t get to be like that with Meghan and chase after me like that. What would she have done if she found me? I didn’t want to think about it anymore. “Well I’m fine. I’m going to go help Cam with her magic. I’ll see you later.”

  He nodded. “Yeah.” He was quiet. Ston wasn’t one for words.

  Cam and I walked back to the empty warehouse in silence. I don’t think she really wanted to talk about it, and I wasn’t sure what to say. She yanked the door open, and I followed her inside. We were walking to the center when I heard something crackle under my foot. I looked down to see a sheet of white paper.