Coming Soon

by Christy Gissendaner

  “God,” he groaned. His grip on my hair tightened once more. His hips moved faster, his cock pumping in and out of my mouth like a piston. “I’m going to come.”

  I stiffened with absolute fear. He expected me to swallow? I’d heard the horror stories and wasn’t sure I could do it. When the first jet of warm, salty semen coated the back of my throat, I realized I’d panicked for no reason. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.

  “That’s right. Take it all, baby,” Jase coaxed in a silky voice. “That’s so fucking sexy.”

  Debatable, but I did as he asked, my throat working convulsively to swallow the come filling my mouth. Once he’d finished, he slipped from my mouth and stroked my cheek. “You did well.”

  I moved my jaw from side to side. Was it possible to get TMJ from one blowjob? Jase slid his fingers lower and cupped my chin. He forced my gaze up, and the appreciation and desire in his eyes made the discomfort worth everything.

  He caught my hand in his and helped me to my feet. “Stand right there.”

  He circled me, trailing his free hand over the curve of my hip and teasing my erect nipples. The snap of the belt shocked me and I jerked forward in an instinctive move to protect myself.

  “Don’t move,” he ordered. He circled around to the front of me and slapped the belt against his palm. “Anticipation of pain is worse than the actuality. It won’t hurt you unless you let it. Don’t let it.”

  What in the hell was he talking about? A belt could hurt. I hadn’t been spanked much as a kid, but enough to know when my father broke out his belt, I’d better run and hide.

  The belt landed on the side of my thigh, more of a flick than anything. “That wasn’t so bad,” I said with a relieved smile.

  Jase lifted an eyebrow and circled me once more. The belt landed on the curve of my buttock. It stung, but not enough to convince me to stop. He did it several more times, each smack of the belt harder than the one before.

  I tilted my head and gazed at my left hip, the site of the latest lashing. My skin showed several light pink marks. I rubbed my hand over one, and Jase tapped my knuckle with the belt. “Hands down.”

  I dropped my hand and faced forward. I wasn’t sure how much more I could take. Just when I thought I would have to call an end to it, Jase tossed aside the belt. It landed in the corner of the room with a soft whoosh.

  Jase wrapped his hands in my hair and tugged my head backward. Running his free hand over my breasts, he pulled me against him. He was still mostly clothed, but his erection prodded my sore backside.

  He nipped my earlobe with his teeth, and I let out an involuntary sigh. Nice. This I could handle.

  I squeaked when the nip became a bite. He didn’t come close to piercing the skin, but the sting sent a rush of heat through my body. Although there was pain, the subsequent lap of his tongue soothed away any hurt I’d experienced. I could get used to this.

  Jase pinched my nipple, and I gasped. The tenor of his ministrations changed, almost as if my reaction to the rough treatment egged him on. I should be scared. I should call an end to it, but I wanted more.

  I didn’t realize I’d said it aloud until Jase answered.

  “More?” he whispered. “Are you sure?”

  I turned in his arms and met his gaze. “Very sure.”

  As if a dam had broken, he hauled me into his arms and kissed me until I gasped for breath. Even then, he didn’t break the kiss. He lifted me into his arms and strode to the bed. I’d thought he would lay me down. Instead he turned and sat on the edge of the bed, keeping me in his embrace.

  He ravaged my mouth, his lips and teeth sucking and biting in an unending pattern. I kissed him back with abandon. He tugged my hair, pulling my face even closer to his. I’d never imagined hair pulling would be sexy, but it was. With Jase, everything was sexy.

  Jase shoved his jeans and boxers to his knees. He leaned back to roll on a condom and then impaled me on his cock. Only word to describe it. Impaled.

  He rocked his hips forward, and I clung to his shoulders, completely filled by him. We found release quickly, me dissolving first as a million sparkling tremors crossed my vision. Jase curled his fingers into my backs, gripping me to him as his cock jerked within me.

  I slumped forward, cradling my chin on his chest and wrapping my arms around his shoulder. My legs were weightless and my limbs limp from the languorous aftermath. “Not bad at all.”

  Jase tipped my chin up and bussed his lips across mine. “Just the beginning. You said to go slow. I’ll introduce you to the full extent when I’m sure you can handle it.”

  I didn’t argue despite the dual warning and promise. The long ride and explosive sex had exhausted me. I blinked several times, but my lids refused to remain open.

  Jase shifted me onto the mattress and put a hand in the center of my chest, holding me down when I would’ve risen. “Stay here and rest. You won’t be needed on set today.”

  Although I was dying of curiosity to watch the porn production, Jase had a good point. A sex scene was set to film today. Mark and Posey would have no need of my help.

  I watched beneath heavy eyelids as Jase crossed the room and entered the en suite bathroom. He returned a few minutes later, hair damp and fresh smelling. I watched his nude form, admiring the strong thighs and firm chest, until he covered it with a clean shirt and jeans. He sat on the bed to pull on his socks and shoes, and I leaned forward to stroke his back.

  He glanced at me over his shoulder, almost as if he wanted to say something, but instead he stood and left. Although he was in a rush and probably meant nothing by it, his casual disregard pierced my fledgling happiness.

  I awoke in the middle of the night.

  I was still in Jase’s bed, but he was nowhere to be seen. I touched the pillow beside me and it was cool to the touch, as unwrinkled as it had been when I’d fallen asleep.

  I rolled onto my stomach and grabbed my cell phone from the nightstand. I’d put it there earlier in hopes Jase would call. The glowing LED display showed 3 a.m. and no missed calls or texts.

  Shit. Where was he? Why hadn’t he called if he would be late?

  I debated calling Mark or Posey to see if they were still filming, but didn’t want to risk waking them. I got out of bed and pulled on a pair of pajama shorts. The T-shirt I’d worn to bed would have to do. I wasn’t unpacking this late at night. Or early in the morning. Whichever.

  Dim lighting from downstairs guided my way to the first floor. There was no sign of Jase, so I peeked out the front door, relieved to see his Hummer parked outside. I found him on the beach, and I stood on the back deck to watch him.

  Moonlight gilded his hair and shoulders. He was barefoot and hatless, still dressed in the clothes he’d left in hours before. He seemed a solitary figure, misery apparent in every angle of his body, from the downturned head to the half-hearted kick at the waves.

  I descended the stairs and cautiously approached him. The scent of saltwater and brine filled my nostrils as I approached the ocean’s edge.

  Unlike the first time I’d been at the beach, when brown seaweed had peppered the coast line, the sand was white and diamond smooth. My dad had taken me crab hunting that trip. I still remembered the excitement when I captured a tiny hermit crab in the miniature pink fishing net he’d bought me. On every beach vacation afterward, my father had delighted in reminding me of my first catch.

  Thoughts of my dad filled me with sorrow. Never again would I walk the seashore and see my parents holding hands or waving at me as I made an attempt at parasailing. So many good times. There had been no sign of what would soon come, when my entire family was destroyed and left me amidst the rubble.

  They hadn’t been perfect, no parents were, but they were mine and I wanted them back.

  I must’ve made a sound because Jase turned. His eyes were dark in the moonlight, inscrutable, but so familiar. He didn’t open his arms to me. He didn’t gesture me forward. Instead, he stood and watched me, leaving me unsu
re whether to go or stay.

  My emotions were a mess, the memories of my family leaving me raw and exposed. The safest route for me was anger, so I turned it full-force on him. “Where have you been?”

  He didn’t seem surprised by the vehemence in my tone. “Out.”

  The cool night air wrapped around me, and I shivered. I crossed my arms over my chest and huddled my shoulders. It was January for Christ’s sake. What was I thinking coming out without a jacket?

  “Where?” I could do one word answers too.

  He got to his haunches and picked up a shell. After tossing it into the ocean, he rubbed his hands together to get rid of the damp sand. “I went to La Vela.”

  The popular nightclub on Thomas Drive, a few miles away from our townhouse, was sure to be filled with women despite it being off-season. Why would he have sex with me and then visit a bar? Was I not good enough?

  Who was I kidding? Of course I wasn’t. His family would never approve. Jase had never given me any indication he cared for me as more than a friend. In fact, he’d done everything to convince me he was wrong for me.

  So stupid of me to believe otherwise.

  I turned to leave, but his voice halted me. “I told you. I’m no good for you. But you didn’t listen. You should’ve run when I told you to.”

  I wanted to shout at him, hit him, or do something to let him know how much he hurt me with his continuous cold shoulder. He wasn’t my Jase, the one I depended on to get me through life.

  He stood and turned his back to me. His words were muffled, but I heard them nonetheless. “You’re just another woman in a long list of nameless faces.”

  I shouted then. I got up in his face and released the pain I’d held back. “You’re scared. You’re so fucking scared you can’t admit you want me. I refuse to believe you feel nothing for me. I don’t care what you claim, Jase. I see you, and I know you’re not half the asshole you pretend to be, but you’re doing a pretty fair rendition of one right now. If you don’t want me, fine. I’ll go. But don’t lie and say I’m another notch on your belt because we both know it’s not true. I won’t pretend to know what made you this way, but at least I don’t hide behind my words. I’m fucked up. I’ll be the first to admit it, but I don’t fight what I feel.”

  And then I said the words I never thought I would say to him. “I hate you, you coward.”

  As soon as they’d left my mouth, I realized my mistake. I’d never told someone I hated them. Not Jackie when she’d betrayed and purposefully hurt me. Not my parents. Not even Tom, although I felt it. But in that moment, I did hate him. I wanted to hurt him as badly as he’d hurt me.

  Jase didn’t argue. Instead, he stood there and took my vitriol like a latter day martyr. When I’d finished, I turned and left. Anger carried me the first dozen steps. By the thirteenth, regret weighed me down. I wanted to turn and apologize, to tell him I meant none of the words I’d spoken, but it was too late. I’d hurt him like I intended and the best thing for me to do was leave.

  I went upstairs and dressed. Since I hadn’t unpacked anything but the essentials, it didn’t take me long to gather my things and return downstairs. Jase met me by the door, but I shoved past him and stacked the pretty luggage set he’d bought me in the front driveway. I’d called a cab while I’d been upstairs. It would take a pretty good chunk of my money, but I could buy a ticket on the Greyhound and be out of there before morning light.

  Jase stood on the porch and watched me until the cab arrived. His dark gaze followed me as I helped the driver load my luggage into the trunk. Before I climbed inside, I glanced at him and took my last look at the one person I’d trusted more than anyone. He’d been my anchor in life, the one true constant.

  He didn’t stop me, and that’s when I truly broke.

  Chapter Nineteen

  I had nowhere to go. No job. No friends. Not enough money to live on for more than a couple months.

  I returned to Jase’s apartment in Birmingham and weighed my options. I had one week to make my plans and move out of his apartment before filming wrapped in Florida.

  I briefly considered calling Honey, but pride held me back. Her loyalty was with Jase. He was her boss. I wouldn’t put her career at risk because I was stupid enough to fall in love with my best friend.

  Without Jase there, the apartment was lonely. Much lonelier than I’d imagined.

  Each morning, I scoured the want ads. I put in applications for every fast food restaurant I could find. I even debated going back to Vestavia High on Monday, pretend everything was A-Ok, and continue my life as a high school senior.

  But sitting in class with Jackie, seeing her and being reminded of her brother, was more than I could handle.

  Mark and Posey had called several times since Saturday, enough that I’d finally cut off my phone after texting to let them know I was fine. Jase didn’t call, not even to see if I’d arrived home safely. His nonappearance solidified my motives for leaving.

  Monday came, damp and chilly with the threat of a late afternoon thunderstorm. I woke early, showered, and dried my hair. I unloaded my backpack of everything but school necessities.

  When seven o’clock appeared, I dressed in jeans and a sweater paired with my new jacket. I made it all the way to the bus station down the street until I chickened out and ran back to the apartment just as the first drops of rain began.

  It rained the entire day. Thunder rattled the penthouse apartment and lightning lit up the windows. I huddled on the couch and watched the storm rage. The tempest outside was a perfect match to my emotions. I took joy in Mother Nature’s show of strength. For once, I faced something no one expected me to fight. I couldn’t stop the thunderstorm anymore than I could stop breathing.

  Falling in love. Hurting myself over and over again. Telling my father about my mom’s infidelity. Those were things I could’ve prevented, could’ve stopped if I’d tried.

  Funny how something like a thunderstorm made me realize how stupid I’d been. So many people had hurt me in life. It was extreme stupidity for me to do it to myself.

  For the first time in years, I wanted to change. Be stronger.

  With newfound appreciation for life, I powered on Jase’s laptop and Googled GED classes in the area. A new program was due to start at a local community college on Thursday. Before I changed my mind, I pulled out my debit card and entered my payment information. I printed out the schedule and registration receipt and tucked them away in my backpack.

  A light pink ad caught my eye on the college’s website and I clicked on it. Cosmetology wasn’t something I’d ever considered, but with Honey as my inspiration, it didn’t sound half-bad. I skimmed the requirements, a high school diploma or GED of course, and bookmarked the page for later.

  Now to find a place to live.

  I pulled up the want ads and sought an apartment for rent, preferably one with roommates. Several were available, but not in a price range I could afford. I would have to find a job first, even with the advance Jase had given me.

  Would I have to pay it back? I hadn’t even thought to ask.

  By late evening, drowsiness set in. I’d researched online for most of the day, and my neck was stiff from being bent over the laptop. I stood to stretch just as a key jiggled in the lock and the door opened.

  I stayed still, unable to believe my eyes.

  Jase.

  His curls plastered to his forehead, damp from the unending rain. A soaked jacket clung to his muscular chest, and jeans hung low on his lean hips.

  He still looked hot.

  And angry.

  I took an instinctive step backward, but his gaze locked on mine and he pointed a finger at me. “Don’t even think about it.”

  What had I done?

  Frozen in place, I watched him approach. He kicked off his shoes before tracking water over the hardwood floors, but kept his eyes on me. He removed his jacket and dropped it on the floor.

  My mouth went dry at the sight of the muscles visible
through his wet, white T-shirt. Sexy and angry was a deadly combination.

  “You should learn to answer your phone.” His voice was silky smooth, but edged with steel.

  “You didn’t call.” At least he hadn’t before I’d turned off my cell.

  He arched an eyebrow. “I didn’t?”

  I lifted my chin. I was the one who should be angry after all. He was the one who’d broken my heart. Not vice versa. “What are you doing here?”

  “I had to make sure you weren’t doing something stupid.”

  I crossed my arms and glared at him. “Like what?”

  He snagged the waistband of my jeans and tugged me forward. “Take them off.”

  “Excuse me?” I so wasn’t undressing for him. “Have you lost your mind?”

  He lifted his eyes to mine. “We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Your decision.”

  “I’m not stripping for you.”

  He plucked the button loose. “I’m not asking you to strip. I’m asking you to prove you haven’t cut yourself.”

  I laughed. Perhaps like a crazy person, but it was ridiculous of him to act like he cared. “Don’t worry. I haven’t hurt myself over you.”

  “Take off your jeans, Cara. Now. Before I make you do it.”

  Fury filled me, white hot and intense. I unzipped my jeans, shoved them past my knees, and motioned to my healed thighs. “Happy now?”

  He kneeled at my feet and nudged my knees apart. He slid his fingers over the unmarred skin between my legs and on the back of my thighs. Once he was satisfied I hadn’t lied, his touch gentled, and he placed his forehead on my lower belly. “Thank God.”

  His damp curls chilled my sensitive skin. Although I wanted to be furious, my body melted like butter at his touch. “You came all this way just to check on me?”

  “You turned off your phone. I couldn’t contact you.”

  True. I had. “I texted Mark and Posey.”

  He leaned back on his heels and stared up at me. “I’m sorry for what I said.”