“Thank you, thank you, thank you…”
“Well now you officially owe me.” We walked a few feet around the corner, Brian leading me to a car.
“What do you want in return?” I asked as he opened the passenger side door for me.
“One night...one night to make up for the other night.” I thought about it as he talked.
“I know you’re probably pissed but we can go to your place and I can spend…”
“No...not to my place.”
“Why not?”
“My Dad...he’s in town.”
“Wow, your Dad is here.”
“Yeah, from the shooting situation. You know…” I didn’t have to say anymore. I wondered what he thought about the issue but he looked just as tired as me and was probably equally tired of hearing everyone else’s opinion about it.
“Well you can come to my house then. Whatever...I just want to spend some time with you and... Study.”
I searched his eyes for a lie, trying to figure out his motives as he stood with the door open daring me to get inside.
“One night Brian...and all we are doing is studying.” I warned him.
“Of course, just studying for the exam.”
He took my bag, placing it into the back seat as I got in the car. Crossing my legs as he closed the door I could feel that I had already lied. There was no way we were just studying, I was wetter than a pool and today he looked more gorgeous than our first night. He had a bit of stubble where his clean-shaven face used to be, which gave him this daring look. I was turned on and it was official. We were going to do some studying alright but it wouldn’t be in a book.
7
Black
I was riding him, bucking, bouncing and grinding my hips into his dick like my life depended on it.
He had a nice house but I didn’t have time to see it. Not seconds after we came through the door, our hands all over each other; ripping each other’s clothes off and leaving a trail of discarded garments all the way to the bedroom, where we were now fucking each other’s brains out.
“I’m cumming.” I felt my orgasm slip over me, hot and thrashing through my body until I was shaking all over.
“I’m cumming too.” Brian growled as we both came squeezing each other as I fell off of him into the soft bed. We were both breathing like we had run a marathon with me smiling and him laughing right back at me.
“What’s so damn funny?” I asked as I tried catching my breath.
“You and that guy...he looked so damn sad. I hope you don’t break my heart like that.” I had to laugh at that.
“What heart? You didn’t call me and you probably won’t call me after this.” He shook his head, resting his hands behind it.
“I told you I had to work. It’s been a real mess lately.” I watched as his face went from a smile to a frown.
“Why don’t you tell me about it?” He looked at me, smiling as he got up and headed for his closet. I watched his body as he pulled on a shirt and underwear. It seemed like every part of his body was chiseled and hard with perfectly crafted muscles. I just wanted to lick and touch every inch of his body.
“It's such a long story. I don’t know if you want to hear about my job?”
I knew how it felt to talk about something that you didn’t want to so I left it alone and changed subjects.
“Come on, you got me all off track. I need to get some studying done.”
“Well hell, who’s stopping you? Get your books. Let's get this shit going.”
“Can I borrow a shirt or do you want to study staring at my nakedness?” He laughed and pointed to a drawer, when heard someone banging on the door.
“Are you expecting someone.” He shook his head no.
“Wait here. I’ll be right back.” I did as he said trying to hear what was going on.
I heard the squeaking of a woman’s voice and then Brian’s.
“No, I told you it was over. Now leave.” Lord, please don’t tell me this man has a girlfriend. I never thought about that. I only checked his hand for a ring but never asked about a girlfriend.
“Yes, leave. Goodbye.” I heard the door slam and Brian returned a few minutes later. His face was red and he looked irritated.
“Who was that...your girlfriend?” He waved me off. “I can always leave.”
“She is my ex, just trying to get back in that’s all.”
“You sure she isn’t some fatal attraction or something. I don’t want to be in the middle of your mess.” He laughed at that but I was sort of serious.
“No, she is harmless.”
“Alright, because I didn’t know you had a girlfriend.” His sarcastic remarks were sort of rubbing off on me.
“I’m single unless you want me?”
“You sure about that?” I asked, grinning at him.
“Well, you still didn’t tell me much about that guy outside the school.” I rolled my eyes as I went to his dresser, resuming my search for a shirt. I opened the top drawer. I had a response all mapped out for him but when I saw the gun I stopped in my tracks. The shiny steel handle caught my eye but what lay beside it caused me to freeze. I couldn’t speak.
“What’s wrong?” He must have seen it as he watched me.
“Are you a...a cop?” I asked, turning around.
“Yeah...I don’t really like to tell anyone but.” I didn’t know how to feel. My whole life cops were looked upon as the enemy. The assholes that always arrested my Dad when he was trying to fight for equal rights; predators that harassed citizens and shot unarmed young black men just like the boy from the other half of the city.
I didn’t know what to say.
“Is that a problem?” He asked, coming over to me and pulling me close.
“No...I...I just have never dated a cop.” My Mom actually told me never to date one. It was one of those words of wisdom your parents give you before you are even old enough to participate in whatever act they are telling you about.
I was ten, way too young to encounter a police officer, let alone one that was interested in dating when she let me in on a secret.
“Don’t ever date a cop. They could be crazy and possessive then who will you call for help?” She had a point and it made sense but I was never really interested in a police officer before now.
“I didn’t mean to lie to you or not tell the truth. I just don’t like to tell people about my job.” He slowly closed the drawer, opening another and handing me a shirt.
“So the other night when you left. Were you called over into…”
“With the protests from the shooting?”
“Yes…”
“Yeah, I was there.” He told me shaking his head. “And it is way worse than the news portrays it.”
“I’m not surprised at that.” My Dad had been talking about it nonstop, so I had more information than I saw on the news about what was happening.
“But why won’t they say who did it. Who was the officer?” Brian didn’t say anything. He looked at me shaking his head.
“What? You can’t tell me?”
“No, I might lose my job if I do.” I felt irritated by that.
“So you agree that they shouldn’t tell people who the cop was. If he did nothing wrong then why hide?” I heard my father’s voice as I spoke to Brian but I didn’t realize until the end that I was yelling.
“I shouldn’t have told you. I knew this would complicate things.” I got up, pulling my clothes on as fast as I could.
“Yeah maybe I should have asked a while ago if you were a racist asshole cop.”
“I’m not a racist and I’m not an asshole.” I didn’t want to hear anything else about it. “Well if you’re not, then why do you support this agenda?” He had no answers, breathing deeply and putting his hands up I had all the answers I needed.
My hands were shaking as I put on my shoes.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going home where I won’t be lied to.”
&nbs
p; “I didn’t lie...I just didn’t want to tell you. I don’t talk about work.” Maybe I was being unreasonable, or maybe it was the times, or possibly it was my shock from seeing that gun and the badge but whatever it was, I was done.
“Look...I’ll see you in class. No need to call me.” I told him, grabbing my things and walking out. My Mom told me to never date a cop and I broke the rule. My Dad told me never to date a white man and I had abolished his warning. Now I was outside, walking in the dark to the nearest bus stop with a cracked heart and a backpack full of books. Things couldn’t possibly get any worse.
8
Black
I got home, took a shower, and went straight to sleep. My head was pounding but most of all my heart was hurting. Somehow I kind of fell for the guy, my mind is a little fairy tale-ish to where I think that things are more than they are.
I know I was asking a lot for him to tell me who the officer was, but what if he was like one of them? What if he was a racist asshole and was only fucking me to get some brown sugar that he could brag and talk to his police officer friends about. I felt so stupid and the first thing I saw in the morning was a text from him.
“I’m sorry...I hope you understand why I can’t tell.” I definitely understood. There are some things you just don’t talk about.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were a cop?” I shot back to him.
“Technically I’m not.” I felt like we were playing games. But just as I was about to reply my Dad called.
“Hey Daddy…”
“What is this I hear about you and a white guy?” I felt like my heart had exploded.
“What are you talking about?”
“I ran into Joe down at the loft. He was waiting outside when I left and he said he just saw you with a guy you introduced as your boyfriend.” I wanted to die right then and there.
“Daddy, I’m done with Joe. I just said that so he would leave me alone.” I surprised myself with that lie. It was partly true but I really was ”doing” a white boy.
“So you're not with some white man?” My headache started to slowly come back.
“No father…” That’s what I called him when I got annoyed.
“I was so mad that I went and got a hotel.” I fell back on my bed wishing I could just evaporate into the sheets.
“No Dad...Joe shouldn’t have come and spoken to you but no, I’m not dating a white guy.”
“Well good, if you ever did you know your mother would spin in her grave.” Why did he have to say all this shit?
“Dad, I gotta go.”
“Alright, I’m at the Blakemoor downtown. Deidra is here too. We should all go to dinner.” I would have rather let him believe I was with a white man than eat dinner with Deidra.
“Ok, sounds good.”
“Oh and you know they announced the cop today right?”
“No, what is his name.”
“Jason Miller. Some damn dude that’s already been cited before for excessive force.” That didn’t surprise me. “But I’ll let you go. Got a meeting with some church members today. The prosecutor is supposed to announce whether he will press charges later tonight.”
“Wow okay.” Things were moving quicker than I thought.
“Okay. Talk to you later.”
Looking at my phone, Brian had sent a few more texts.
“I really want to see you today. I have to work tonight.”
“I don’t know about that. I need some time to digest things.” I really did need time. I wasn’t sure about any of this.
“I hope you knowing about me being a cop doesn’t change things.” Things...what things? All we had between us was sex and studying but more sex than anything. Yet I did like to be around him. His sarcasm was a relief to my stressed out existence.
Another text came through, this time from Joe. All of these men in my life and I felt like I couldn’t keep up. From my Dad to Brian and now Joe was still teetering around.
I opened the text only to see a picture of his dick.
“I bet a white boy can’t fuck you like I can.” He was proud of himself, sending me a message from his work line. Unfortunately, I didn’t block that number and now I was staring at his fully hard dick with its veins sticking out.
I said nothing, all of this had to be a bad joke. It must have been play a trick on Alicia day.
“When can I see you?” Brian texted back.
“I don’t know. I have to concentrate on school. We do have an exam this week.”
“We can study late tonight.” He sent the message but I was tired of being his late night rendezvous.
“No, why do I have to see you at night. What about a date?” I was making things too easy for him. It was about time that I pushed the envelope for a change.
“Okay, no problem. What about breakfast in the morning before your classes? Wherever you wanna go.”
I liked the way that sounded. Anywhere I wanted to go and not straight to his house or to mine.
“I just want to be around you.” I had to smile. I had no choice.
“It’s been a long time since a guy has just wanted to be around me just because.”
“Well get used to it.” I had no response. This was too much and I felt like I needed to back off from him. With my Dad being here and Joe acting crazy, maybe it wasn’t the best time for me to pursue a new relationship.
“Maybe we should do the date another day.”
“???”
But I didn’t reply, I didn’t want to make any more decisions today about anybody. I needed to study and not be worried about some guy that’s a cop or another guy that couldn’t let me go.
He sent another message but I didn’t bother to check it. All of this shit was a distraction and I was done being taken off course. I needed one day where I could just concentrate on me and today I was going to leave everyone else in the dark.
9
Blue
“Women… can’t live with them or without them.” and in my case, I couldn’t even tell them the damn truth.
I called and pleaded my heart to Alicia and somehow I got her to agree to breakfast so at least I didn’t have thoughts about her lingering in my head. Now I was at work, changing into full riot gear, getting ready for an announcement that could mean a full-scale riot.
“I heard they aren’t going to charge him? Were gonna be fucked if that happens.” A group of guys from my unit and a few others from the surrounding areas were all standing outside the courthouse ready and waiting for whatever was about to happen.
We had rehearsed possible scenarios and situations all day but now it was time to get down to it.
In less than ten minutes the prosecutor was going to give his decision and we were going to need to be ready.
“Guess we gotta get ready for this bullshit. All these animals and their damn complaints.” Everyone laughed except me.
“That shit’s not funny, Ron.” Every group had that one ultra racist asshole and usually we just let it go but today I was tired of letting shit go.
“What did you say, McGwire?”
“I said calm all that shit down. If that’s the way you feel, keep it to yourself.” The group was quiet, everyone staring at me.
“Alright men. The announcement is about to be made.” The sergeant came over, breaking up our impromptu meeting.
Ron walked away and everyone turned and walked towards the front of the building where we were supposed to hold our ground and make sure the city buildings weren’t destroyed.
I heard the announcement over the loud speaker but my thoughts were on the crowd, and on Alicia. She stopped texting me back earlier. I wasn’t sure what the hell that meant but I had every intention of going to see her whenever I got off duty.
“We will not be prosecuting Officer Miller.” I had a feeling that would be the case. There were rumors around the department that there would be no charges but there was no way of knowing for sure. Now, we were facing an angry mob of people.
Th
ey chanted, yelled and shouted as we stood our ground as the only line of protection between them and the courthouse.
Amidst the noise of bottles crashing, people yelling, and car alarms sounding, I caught sight of something out of the corner of my eye.
A guy zipped across the street, his hands raised and he was chanting. He was no threat. Hell, he even had tears streaming down his face when I saw on of my men lift his baton. I don’t know if it was instinct or what but I grabbed the raised baton without even thinking about it.
“What the hell are you doing McGwire?” He screamed through his shield.
“Why would you hit an unarmed man?” I had seen my fair share of shit since we’d been out here. Everything from lockups, pellet guns, and tear gas canisters thrown into crowds along with a few hundred arrests so maybe I was at an overload.
Snatching the baton from my grasp, he raised it above the man again but I stepped in the way, guarding the man with my body.
“Get the hell out of the way, McGwire!”
“No, leave him alone. Shit, these people are just pissed.” I understood it. I wasn’t black but I understood the frustration, though none of my colleagues seemed as understanding.
He jumped in my face as the other SWAT members started swarming around. Shit moved so fast that I couldn’t separate between trying to shield the protestor and save my own damn life in the process.
“So you're some kind of fucking NAACP member, McGwire?” Before I could respond, shots rang out. I didn’t know where they came from but the crowd definitely reacted to it. People scattered in every different direction causing a human stampede. More shots echoed. As officers drew their weapons and instinctively went into surveillance and protect mode, I looked down, wincing from a sharp pain.
My leg felt like someone stuck me with a hot poker right in the thigh.
“McGwire is hit. Officer down!” I didn’t realize I’d been shot until my knees buckled. With no time to react and no strength to hold myself up, I found the hole in my pants along with the blood that was now coating my fingers.
Black and Blue: BWWM Romance Page 5