by Dana James
Fructose should not be confused with high-fructose corn syrup (HFCS). HFCS has the same glucose and fructose percentage as table sugar, but it is made from genetically modified corn sprayed with glyphosate. It is used in many sugar-sweetened beverages like soda, fruit juice, sports drinks, and energy drinks. Sugar, such as HFCS, consumed in a liquid form is the most damaging to the body and brain because it bypasses the appetite-suppressing hormones, which are activated when you chew.1 Drinking sugar increases the risk of obesity and insulin resistance, not to mention fatty liver and visceral fat because beverages don’t contain other ingredients, like fat and flour, which trigger the release of appetite-suppressing hormones to tell the body you are full. So while a serving of cake may contain the same amount of sugar as a serving of soda, you’ll typically consume less food later on in the day if you eat the cake versus drinking a soda. A piece of cake may become lunch; a soda never will. Sadly, we’re seeing six-year-old kids with fatty liver disease because they drink soda like water (one of my clients was actually bottle-fed cola!). There’s no good reason why soda (or other forms of liquid sugar) should be in your diet. The same applies to HFCS. Nix it now.
Diet soda isn’t any better than the “real” stuff. The fake, calorie-free sweeteners added to diet drinks change the gut microbiome for the worse, trigger insulin, and are highly addictive.2 If you’re addicted to soda (diet or otherwise), try replacing it with kombucha, a fizzy, fermented tea that comes in many different flavors and is actually good for you, as it can help repopulate the gut microbiome with beneficial microbes that support weight loss.
A note on agave. Agave can be 50 to 90 percent fructose. You don’t need to be concerned about the fructose percentage if you’re just stirring a teaspoon into your tea. If, however, you’re making a cake with it and you’re going to eat the entire thing (I know some of you), then the higher percentage of fructose found in agave is an issue. Swap it out for maple syrup or coconut syrup, which have much lower percentages of fructose.
IS SUGAR ADDICTIVE?
When I was in my mid-thirties, I developed an almost-nightly ritual of making cacao truffles at ten p.m. I felt viscerally pulled toward the kitchen, where I found myself rolling a mixture of cacao, coconut oil, dates, and almonds into balls—and then eating most of the truffles on the spot! The kitchen became a place of fear. If you’ve never experienced this magnetic pull toward food, you may not understand this, but if you have, you get it, that pain of not feeling like you can trust yourself. Rationally, I absolutely did not want to create those treats, but there was a power beyond my consciousness that drove me to make them anyway. And it wasn’t because I had a magnesium deficiency that was making me crave cacao and almonds (a common justification I hear for eating chocolate).
Eating sugar (and even the very thought of it) triggers the release of the pleasure neurotransmitter dopamine. But just because sugar stimulates dopamine and triggers the same brain circuitry as recreational drugs doesn’t mean it is a drug. Meditation, connection, intimacy, sex, yoga, breath work, trying new foods, and exercise can also release dopamine, but we’re not necessarily addicted to them. For a substance to be addictive, it also needs to induce behavioral changes like bingeing, withdrawal, craving, and tolerance. If you feel like you’re addicted to sugar, you’re likely to believe that sugar can make you act this way, but before you tag yourself as a sugar addict, ask yourself whether you are addicted to other foods like nut butters, popcorn, crackers, or the opulence of eating. If so, it may not be sugar that is addictive but rather eating that is addictive for you. That is more psychological than physical because the “addiction” applies to foods beyond sugar.
Researchers aren’t convinced that sugar is addictive, either.3 Many of the headlines proclaiming things like “Sugar is more addictive than cocaine!” actually misinterpret the studies cited. In one case, researchers found that rats could become addicted to saccharine, the noncaloric sweetener found in Sweet’N Low, but sugar was proclaimed to be addictive, not the sugar substitute.4 Other research shows that when rats are deprived of their food, they gorge on sugar,5 but when their food isn’t restricted, they don’t binge on sweets.6 As any woman on a diet knows, chocolate is never more appealing than when she can’t have it.
In order for someone to be classified as an addict, they must show symptoms of withdrawal. Most women aren’t going into the kitchen to pour packets of granulated sugar down their throats, nor are they behaving like junkies looking for their next hit. They may have anxiety-filled, sleepless nights and be testy for a week as they settle into not getting what they want, but that’s the extent of it.
WHY YOU MIGHT REALLY BE CRAVING SUGAR
If sugar isn’t addictive, what might be causing your cravings? There are many reasons that could be at work:
You want a feel-good dopamine hit. Indeed, sugar gives you that, but so do pleasurable noneating activities like intimacy, sex, meditation, group exercise, conscious breathing, going to the movies, and dancing. And unlike sugar, these activities provide a lingering high because they also produce oxytocin and serotonin—two well-known happiness-delivering brain chemicals.
Interestingly, when researchers made rats’ cages more fun by adding toys such as hamster wheels and plastic igloos and improving the overall environment (they went from a one-level cage to a triplex), they discovered the rats consumed 90 percent less sugar.7 All the rats needed was a pleasurable distraction and a prettier home and they no longer felt drawn to the sweet food.
Researchers also found that breast-feeding soothed newborns more effectively than giving them droplets of sugar water.8 Not only is the breast milk nourishing, but the skin-to-skin contact between the baby and its mother releases oxytocin and dopamine, which calms infants and adults alike.9
Another way to alter the brain chemistry is through meditation. Meditation has consistently been shown to increase activity in the prefrontal cortex, which improves self-control and rational thought. Addiction short-circuits communication to the prefrontal cortex but meditation rewires it. If you feel you have a dependency on sweet foods, meditation must be part of your recovery program. Group meditation is even more powerful because you get the added oxytocin from being connected to the group.
You haven’t slept. Without a doubt, if you don’t sleep well or get less than 6.5 hours of sleep in a night, you’ll crave more sugar and fat-dense food because the lack of sleep can change the appetite-regulating hormones ghrelin and leptin. The solution isn’t to eat sweets, it’s to get more sleep! We’ll talk more about the benefits of a good night’s sleep in Part III.
You’ve skipped meals. When your blood sugar drops too low, even your kid’s slobbered-on candy looks enticing. But while your brain might be screaming at you to go for the sugar hit, what your physical body really wants is a nutrient-dense meal. Before you reach for the candy, pause, breathe, and prepare yourself a meal. Sit down to eat it. Vow to make time for yourself. Eating shouldn’t be a last-minute consideration. It’s crucial to your health, brain, and mood. Structure your day to allow time for three regular meals.
You’ve got PMS. Don’t fight it. Instead of laying into that brownie, though, increase your starchy carbs. Make a frittata with baby potatoes, zucchini, and tomatoes or have black bean pasta with tomatoes, basil, and vegetables. If you’re certain you’re about to get your period that day, have some dark chocolate. It will be part of your pleasure meal.
You have food sensitivities. When you crave sugar, you are usually craving the sweet-fat combination found in cookies, cakes, chocolate, ice cream, and pastries. That’s why a brownie trumps fruit for dessert. What do these foods have in common? They’re attached to gluten and dairy, two of the most common food sensitivities.
Food sensitivities can alter the brain chemistry and depress serotonin levels, as the serotonin is sequestered to counter the inflammation those sensitivities cause. When serotonin levels are low, you’ll crave more sugary
foods, as they are the quickest (but not the most effective) way to increase serotonin. Eliminating gluten and dairy from your diet allows your brain serotonin levels to rise naturally, as you have access to all the serotonin your brain synthesizes.
Your last meal was too salty. If you crave something sweet immediately after a meal, your meal may have been too salty. A balanced flavor contains fat, acid, salt, and sweet, FASS for short. If one element is overly dominant, you’ll crave the flavor that was submissive in the meal, most commonly the sweetener. The antidote for this is not sugar but water to dilute the saltiness. Have a glass of sparkling mineral water instead of dessert.
Your brain is playing tricks on you. In Part III, we’ll delve more deeply into how to counteract the psychological hooks that keep leading you back to sugary (and other) foods, but for now I want to say that once you reevaluate the psychological reasons that cause you to overeat, you will find it much easier to let go of the cravings that dominate your behavior. With time, the cravings will go away for good!
One evening when I was in my compulsive-chocolate-truffle-making phase, I thought hard about why I continued to make myself sweets when eating them only made me feel terrible and disappointed with myself afterward. I realized I was nurturing myself with those treats. This shouldn’t have been a surprise; that was one of the ways my own mother showed affection—dessert every night! Once I saw the association, it was an easy fix. I decided to make the Wonder Woman’s tea. A cup of warm tea is very nurturing for me, and something my mother also did for me. In an instant, my desire to continually whip up sweets vanished.
And that’s my final point on sugar and addiction: Your thoughts are more powerful than any sugar-triggered dopamine release from the brain. You are not powerless before sweets; they do not control you.
CHAPTER 12
Permission for Pleasure
Pleasure makes us feel alive. Without it, a woman can become a distorted version of herself. When we are too busy, too fearful, or too consumed with what others think of us or need from us, we can turn to food as a substitute for the pleasure we are missing in other parts of our lives. As Jungian analyst Marion Woodman describes, “the longing for sweets is really a yearning for love or sweetness.”
Your treat meals are essential for developing a long-term relationship with food. Restriction is on the same spectrum as compulsion; both are behaviors that come from lack of trust in yourself. Because of this, about 30 percent of women I work with initially don’t want to add the treat meals because they worry that doing so will trigger an insatiable craving for more carbs and fat. I allow them to do this for the first four weeks, then I am much more insistent about them adding the treat meal into their weekly plan.
A case in point: Suzy was 170 pounds when she came to see me. At five foot one, she was obese. She did not eat a single starchy carb or treat for nine months. She achieved her goal of 108 pounds and maintained this weight for about three years. Then . . . she put it all back on—a sad and all-too-common story. Suzy hadn’t created a harmonious relationship with food. She still feared it.
As part of the Food Fundamentals, I propose one treat meal or snack—something that feeds your feminine soul—each week. It could be coconut ice cream on a lazy summer afternoon, six squares of dark chocolate and a cognac by the fireplace, or truffle fries and mezcal as you giggle with your best friend about your dating mishaps or your partner’s annoying habits. These treats are for enjoyment, and that, in itself, is a form of nourishment. There’s a profound difference between diving into a plate of fig-and-almond cookies and immediately feeling guilty about it versus putting the cookies on a pretty plate, playing soft music, and savoring the hints of cardamom, honey, and figs as you taste each bite. It’s the same food, but the intention—compulsion vs. pleasure—couldn’t be more disparate.
There’s no restriction on what you eat, but this isn’t a binge fest. It’s not pizza and beer followed by Skinny Cow ice cream at a friend’s party because there was nothing else to eat. It’s not a “cheat” day or even a “cheat” meal. It’s a treat and it’s for pleasure.
Treat meals can also consist of healthy foods that are not on your archetype’s meal plan because they contain too many carbohydrates for daily consumption. For instance, you might enjoy avocado on gluten-free toast, granola with coconut yogurt, or a macrobiotic bowl with squash, rice, and beans. If lasagna is one of your favorite dishes, you can have it provided you’re not abstaining from gluten and dairy. (The treat meals should only contain gluten and dairy if you’re absolutely sure you don’t have a sensitivity to these foods.)
WHAT ABOUT PORTION SIZES?
There’s no limit on portion sizes for your treat meals because I want you to have the freedom to let go of any rules around food. If you want a big bowl of pasta accompanied by a glass of red wine followed by tiramisu, go for it. But the treat meal should never feel obsessive. I had one client who approached her treat meal much as an addict would her drug of choice, planning in advance exactly what she was going to have. She’d dream about it and then, when it finally came time to have her treat meals, she was like a caged animal that had been released.
When we delved into the psychology behind this behavior, we discovered that my client’s parents hadn’t allowed sweets in the house when she was a kid. She would buy them in secret with her pocket money and eat them under the bed covers. Her beloved grandmother, whom she visited weekly, would also give her a little stash of sweets to take home with her. When her mother discovered the candy wrappers under her bed, she cut off her pocket money and forbade her seeing her grandmother for three months.
She had learned to associate sweets with secrecy and punishment, so when I gave her permission to eat the treats, she tried to get as much in before anyone stopped her again. It was only when we teased out this memory and released her unconscious fear of being shamed and disconnected that she was finally able to create peace with food again.
WHAT ABOUT ALCOHOL?
Your limit is four glasses of alcohol per week. If you’re not a drinker, this will feel generous; if you are, this can feel oppressive. But trust me, you will still feel connected and have a life with four or fewer glasses per week. You’re just not used to it . . . yet! If you’re using alcohol as permission to switch off—a Wonder Woman habit—skip to Chapter 20 for alternative ways to address this.
The best alcohol choices are organic wine, organic champagne, tequila, mezcal, gin, and gluten-free (not grain-based) vodka, as these contain fewer sugars and carbs than beer and brown spirits like rum and whiskey. Drink only organic wine and champagne, as nonorganic varieties may be made from grapes that were sprayed with pesticides and yeast that has been genetically modified.
Tequila, mezcal, vodka, and gin have less sugar than wine but not by much. The difference between a 2-ounce shot of tequila and a 5-ounce glass of wine is ¼ teaspoon of sugar, so you can choose your drink of choice based on your preference. Clear liquor is only better than wine if you are very sensitive to sugar. If you feel excessively hungover or experience nasal stuffiness after drinking one glass of wine, but are drinking nonorganic wine, your symptoms could be from the additives, the genetically modified yeast, or pesticide residue on the grapes rather than an inherent sensitivity. You might also have an overgrowth of Candida in your gut that is triggering these symptoms. Chapter 5 explains how to clear Candida from the gut and restore the gut microbiome. Beer contains gluten and yeast, so if you want a flat stomach, skip it.
While abstinence works for substance abuse, food is essential to your very existence and you must learn to create a trusting relationship with it. Only by eating your own birthday cake or the occasional piece of blueberry pie will you come to understand that doing so doesn’t automatically lead to weight gain or turn you into a sugar addict.
CHAPTER 13
Archetype Meal Plans
I’ve designed each archetype’s meal plan to follow the guidelines
outlined in Part I. All of the recipes are included in the next chapter, though there are countless other meals and snacks you can eat on the Archetype Diet. I suggest starting with your archetype’s meal plan for the first ten days so you can experience how good it feels to eat this way.
NURTURER MEAL PLAN
DAY 1
DAY 2
DAY 3
BREAKFAST
Cherry Chocolate Smoothie
Strawberry Hemp Smoothie
Matcha Avocado Smoothie
LUNCH
Pan-Roasted Wild Salmon with Beet and Spinach Salad
Smoked Trout and Vegetable Plate with Hemp and Chia Pesto
Shrimp and Veggie Avocado Bowl
SNACK
Fresh Blueberries
Pink Mylk
4 Brazil Nuts with Goji Berries
DINNER
Pan-Seared Lemon Sole with Wild Arugula Salad