Finding Lacey Moon

by Donya Lynne

  A conflicted one, that’s who.

  He shouldn’t have reacted on emotion. He should have waited until he was calm before facing her. And then he should have listened to her without judgment.

  Ah, the gift of hindsight.

  After letting all she’d said last night stew in his mind, he knew she had hit the nail on the head with her concerns about how he would have reacted to her had he known her identity from the start. Would he have taken the time to get to know her, or would he have been too caught up with the name and all it entailed to see past the celebrity to the woman? He would have liked to say the former, but he had a feeling it would have been the latter. Not knowing who she was had allowed them to get to know one another at a level her celebrity status would have interfered with.

  Hadn’t he made a dozen assumptions about her when he learned who she was? He had assumed that someone like Lacey Moon would have her shit together. That managers, coaches, and trainers dictated her life to the minute, and that she didn’t need a damn thing from anyone. And that had only been for starters.

  Now that he’d read her journal, he knew the truth was far from what he’d assumed. Lacey was a human like everyone else, and she came with the same baggage and desires all humans do, only hers were magnified by her celebrity status, making it harder for her to find any peace and understanding about what she wanted from life.

  But more than anything, he had learned that she did need him. And he had failed her.

  So, yes, he was afraid. What if he had broken the spell that had brought them together and caused them to fall in love? What if he went to her and found only pain and rejection in her eyes instead of the love and relief he’d grown accustomed to seeing?

  “How the tables have turned,” Liam said, shaking his head knowingly.

  “What?” But Scott already knew what. He had never been able to hide anything from Liam, despite getting at each other’s throats the past two months. The two could have been twins for all the freaky mind meld mojo they worked with one another.

  Liam leaned closer. “She was afraid to be honest with you for fear of your reaction, and you reacted just the way she feared, which was what held her tongue in the first place. And now you’re afraid of being honest with her for fear of her reaction, and you’re fucking terrified that she’ll react the same way you did, aren’t you? It’s like you two have reversed roles.”

  Scott sagged. “Liam, I can’t lose her twice.”

  “So, you’re just going to accept that you’ve lost her and not even try to get her back?”

  Scott hung his head. “I don’t even know where to begin to get her back, Liam.”

  Liam stood, crossed the hall to his own office, and rummaged through the files. When he returned, he held a rental contract in his hand. “Here. Her address. Start with that.” He placed it on top of her journal. “You said you needed to ship those back, right. Well, maybe you should.”

  “Why do I get the feeling there’s more to your idea than that?”

  Liam smirked. “Because you know me too well.”

  “What do you suggest?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe you should include a little something extra in the package for her.”

  “Like what?”

  Liam shrugged. “That’s up to you to figure out, little brother.” He walked to the door, stopped, turned around, and pointed to the bag of food. “I’d tell you to eat before that gets cold, but I think it’s already too late.” With that, he disappeared, calling back, “Hey, I think the last of the news crews are finally giving up and heading out.”

  Scott stared at the address on the contract. “Thanks.”

  Then he pulled the food from the bag and ate his dinner as the first flash of hope he’d felt in twenty-four hours lit inside his heart.

  Chapter 24

  Lacey dropped her handbag on the couch and beelined for the kitchen.

  “How did it go?” her mom said from the table, a cup of tea in her hand and her empty lunch plate in front of her.

  She grabbed the milk from the refrigerator. “Fine.” She’d met with Trent today to discuss her plans for training. After being home five days, it was time to look forward instead of back. She couldn’t wallow forever.

  “A package came for you today.” Her mom pointed to the counter.

  “For me?” Lacey set the milk down and spun the small box to read the mailing label.

  When she saw that it had come from McCord Cabin Rentals, her heart skipped a beat.

  “Is that from him?” her mom said.

  She glanced across the kitchen then grabbed a knife from the drawer and sliced the box open. Peeling back the flaps, she was surprised to see her journal. She hadn’t realized she’d left it behind. She lifted it out to find her cookbook underneath. Otherwise, there was no note. Nothing to indicate Scott had even sent it.

  “No.” She dropped the books back in the box, took them upstairs, and set them on her desk.

  * * *

  Christmas came and went, then New Year’s, and then Valentine’s Day.

  After reaching out to a few other former gold medalists who’d survived the fires of stardom and getting some good advice about how to handle her career, Lacey set some new parameters with Trent, as well as with her publicist and the media. Instead of being a hapless bystander, she took control of her own brand. No more makeup ads. No more last-minute interviews. Her focus was going to be on training and improving her skills. The rest could wait.

  The first week of March, she was going through the piles on her desk, trying to make sense of the chaos as she decluttered her space and started packing things up to move into her new apartment. She pulled the box from McCord Cabin Rentals in front of her and took out her journal.

  It had been three months since she’d left Hope Falls. A lifetime ago, but it felt like just yesterday. Her heart still ached.

  She opened her journal and began flipping through, skimming the entries. Reliving the special moments, smiling at the happy memories, and then tearing up when she reached the recounting of that last day.

  It was time to write the final entry in this journal so she could retire it and start a new one. One that would document her progress back into competition form.

  She grabbed a pen and turned to the next page.

  And promptly sucked in her breath.

  The page should have been blank, but it wasn’t. Placing her hand over her mouth, she read in stunned silence.

  Mattie (you’ll always be Mattie to me),

  I’ve had time to think, and I realize now why you did what you did. You were right. If I’d known who you really were, I don’t think I would have gotten to know the real you. And I liked the real you I got to know. A lot. I imagine not many have had the rare opportunity I’ve had to truly know you, and I’m honored you chose me to share yourself with.

  But then I betrayed your trust. I accused you before I understood your reasons. Instead of listening, I put up a wall. Something I’ve gotten very good at in the last ten years, by the way. I need to work on not doing that in the future. But now that I know the why behind what you did, I would have done the same thing in your shoes. I get it now. Completely.

  Mattie, you’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever known. What you did took courage and strength. More than I think I could have mustered under the circumstances. I see that now. And I can only hope Savannah grows up to be half as strong and courageous as you.

  I’m so sorry I hurt you.

  I miss you.

  I need you.

  I love you. Still. Even more than before.

  And I’d love to hear your voice again.

  Wake up beside you.

  Touch you.

  Kiss you.

  Hold you.

  …If my actions and careless words haven’t destroyed all hope for us.

  If you want to try again, I’m here. I’m waiting. I’ll leave it up to you and honor whatever decision you make. I know I hurt you, and for that I am truly s
orry. Please forgive me. Please come back. Hope Falls isn’t the same without you.

  Yours,

  Scott

  Lacey blinked through her tears and reread Scott’s note. Then she read it again.

  He still loved her. He had forgiven her.

  And his forgiveness had been here all along. If only she’d looked at her journal earlier.

  Scott was the missing piece. The one thing she needed to be truly happy now that her life was moving in the right direction. The logistics didn’t matter. The fact that he lived over seven hours away was inconsequential. She loved him, and if there was still a chance to make things right, she would grab it and never let go.

  She snatched up her phone and dialed. When her coach answered, she said, “Trent, there’s been a change of plans.”

  “What do you mean? Don’t tell me you’ve decided to retire. I don’t think I could ta—”

  “No, I’m not retiring. Not yet.” She smiled. “But I need a few days off. Maybe a week. And then I’ll explain everything.”

  She was in control. And she knew exactly what she wanted.

  Chapter 25

  At five o’clock the next day, Scott followed Liam out of the office and locked up.

  “Any plans tonight?” Liam said.

  “No. Just…home.”

  “It’s supposed to warm up next week.” Liam looked toward the blue sky. “Maybe we should check the trails for fallen trees before the summer tourists come through.”

  Scott tossed his jacket in the cab of his truck. “Yeah. Sure.”

  Uneasy sympathy coated Liam’s expression. “Still haven’t heard from her?”

  Her. Lacey. Mattie. It had been three months. Surely, she’d seen his note by now. The fact she still hadn’t called spoke volumes. He’d blown it. The best thing to happen to him since Savannah, and he’d let her slip through his fingers because he’d been too proud and self-centered to try and see things from her perspective.

  “No. Nothing.” He halfheartedly pulled open the door and climbed behind the wheel.

  Liam gave him a tight smile and nodded in understanding. “Well, maybe soon, huh?”

  “Whatever.” He cranked the engine. Then, with a simple lifting of his hand that passed for a wave, he pulled out and headed for home. As he rounded the bend, his foot almost lifted off the gas when he saw a blue Ford Escape parked in his driveway.

  Someone was sitting on the porch.

  Someone with blond hair.

  Hair that was longer than he remembered.

  She stood as he drew closer, and his heart began to race and beat hard enough he could feel the vibration against his sternum. Thoughts whirred through his mind, and his hands trembled as he put the truck in park and released the door.

  As he made his way up the sidewalk, their eyes met. In that moment, Scott knew what it felt like to look into the eyes of an angel. Mattie could still take his breath away.

  He stopped in front of her, not daring to hope she was here to stay. “Mattie…”

  Her pretty eyebrows furrowed, and her face contorted into a pained expression a split second before she rushed forward and buried herself inside his arms.

  “Sshh.” His heart nearly burst from his chest as he held her close, kissing the top of her head, fighting back tears of his own as she unburdened what felt like a lifetime of emotion.

  Her fingers clutched his shirt, and she pressed her face against his chest as she cried.

  Closing his eyes, Scott gave thanks to whatever had finally brought her back to him, whether it was fate, her grandpa, or nothing at all.

  She was here now. Everything was right again.

  * * *

  Lacey hadn’t intended to cry. She had thought she could stay composed. But then she saw his truck. Then him. And then he was walking toward her and looking at her with what she could only describe as awe. As if she had risen from the dead and he couldn’t believe his good fortune.

  But the moment he said her name—her real, given name—she broke. The culmination of everything slammed into her, bringing her out as if from a dream. Until now, none of this had felt real. Through the long drive north, returning to Hope Falls, pulling into his driveway and seeing his cabin, to walking up to his porch…it had all felt surreal. As if she were outside her body observing instead of actively participating.

  Feeling his warmth, his touch…hearing his voice again…seeing him. Now it was real. She was here. With him. And he was holding her, kissing her hair, whispering loving words.

  “You’re here. You’re really here.” He gently rocked her. “I’m sorry, Mattie. I’m so sorry I hurt you. Just…stay with me. God, please stay. I can’t lose you again.” His strong arms shuddered as he squeezed her harder.

  “You won’t,” she managed to choke out between sobs. “You won’t lose me again. I love you.”

  A mangled sob ruptured from his throat as if he’d been fighting it. And then another as he drove his face into her hair.

  Men like Scott didn’t cry easily. It took something pretty monumental to bring this kind of emotion out of a tough, rugged guy like him. And even then, such men rarely if ever let others see them cry. Knowing that he trusted her to see him this way meant more than words could convey.

  “I love you, Mattie.”

  “I should have been honest with you from the start.”

  He pulled back, shaking his head as he cradled her face in his hands. “No.” His eyes were rimmed in red. “If you had, I never would have fallen in love with you.”

  How had she found such an incredible man? “Scott—”

  But his lips found hers before she could say another word, and whatever she’d been about to say vanished. Over and over, his mouth crashed against hers, firm, insistent…yearning.

  In an instant, her body responded, reawakened after three months of dormancy. Never had a kiss been more salacious, more evocative, more full of promise and love and freedom.

  Because Scott was freeing. In his own way, he’d freed her from who she’d once been so she could realize who she was meant to become. The two of them together were synergistic, better together than apart.

  In the months since she’d left Hope Falls, something had been missing. It wasn’t just that she’d missed Scott. She’d missed who she’d been when she was with him. How she’d felt when they were together. He was her perfect complement, and she was his.

  With what felt like unimaginable restraint, he released her mouth and pulled back, his eyes penetrating hers.

  “Blue,” he said, almost refreshingly.

  “What?” She blinked and swayed toward him, missing his lips on hers.

  “Your eyes…they’re blue. Not brown. I like them.”

  With a smile, she nodded. “I ditched the brown contacts when I got home.”

  “Why?”

  “Because they weren’t me. I figured it was time to finally embrace me. Not Lacey Moon, but Mattie.” She caressed his chest through his shirt. “And Mattie doesn’t have brown eyes or long, brown and red hair. She’s a blue-eyed blonde.”

  “And she’s beautiful.”

  She bit her lip. “And she’s realized she likes the simple things in life a lot more than she thought.”

  “You calling me simple?”

  Pressing closer and searching his face, she shook her head. “Absolutely not. In fact, you’re one of the most complicated people I’ve ever met.” She raised onto her tiptoes and placed a sweet, lingering kiss on his mouth. “But despite your crazy-busy schedule, you lead a refreshingly simple life.”

  He kissed her back then bent his neck so his forehead touched hers. “One you think you might like to share with me someday?”

  Happiness bubbled inside her stomach as she gazed into his serious eyes. “One I’d like to start sharing with you right now if you’ll let me.”

  “Done.”

  “That was easy.”

  “Now you’re calling me easy?” His hands gripped her hips and pulled her against him. />
  “If the shoe fits…”

  He gave her a heated grin as his fingers grazed her bottom. “Do you want me to show you how easy I am?”

  “I thought you’d never ask.”

  With one final kiss, he took her hand and led her inside, up the stairs, and to his bedroom.

  * * *

  “I was beginning to think I’d lost you,” he said, slipping her sweatshirt off her shoulders. Her skin was still as soft, still as pristine. “What took you so long to come back?”

  “I just found your note yesterday.” She pushed her hands under his long-sleeve Henley. He raised his arms and helped her pull it over his head.

  His fingers trailed down her stomach to her jeans. “Yesterday?”

  She ran her lips over his chest as she unbuckled his belt and pulled it from the loops. “Yes. I was too heartbroken to look at my journal sooner.”

  He groaned as her mouth pressed against his chest again. Her tongue teased his nipple. God, if he didn’t get her out of her clothes soon, he would pass out. “If you’d read it sooner, you wouldn’t have been so heartbroken.”

  She let out a soft laugh. “True, but then would this feel as good now as it does?” She unzipped his fly and eased her hand inside to cup his erection.

  He gasped and nearly came on the spot. “No more talking.”

  In a flurry, they finished undressing then fell into each other’s arms on the bed. He was already rolling on a condom. He’d waited three months to be with her again. He wouldn’t wait another second.

  She cried out and dug her fingers into his back as he plunged inside her.

  In a rhythm as old as time, he rocked against her, falling more in love with every stroke. This was his future wife. One day, she would have his name. He knew in his soul she’d been sent to Hope Falls so he could find her…even as she was finding herself. Together, they’d found each other.