by Aimee Horton
Dottie Harris loves her children, however, wishes that every time she walks near the table she didn't stand in something sticky.
November 8, 2011 at 20:26
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is encouraging the world to embrace her new fashion trend: Mismatched socks. Please - and then my children won't look "special".
November 10, 2011 at 14:52
6 people like this
Dottie Harris would like to replace her legs for ones that don't ache, and her belly for one that doesn't wobble.
November 15, 2011 at 16:54
5 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks it must surely be nearly Rijoca-o-clocka?
November 16, 2011 at 16:32
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is trying to scrape the Weetabix, dried banana and what she can only assume to be blueberries off the high chair in a vain attempt to make her house look less like a dirt bomb has hit it.
November 17, 2011 at 9:15
1 person likes this
Dottie Harris is regretting planning salad for dinner tonight. STUPID idea.
November 18, 2011 at 16:51
2 people like this
Dottie Harris is making a curry.
November 18, 2011 at 19:57
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is loving the karma of The Monster hating The Chubster watching him on the toilet.
November 19, 2011 at 9:23
10 people like this
Dottie Harris is wondering if her daughter is the only child in the world to be scared of the second verse of “Row Row”?
November 21, 2011 at 12:43
3 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks it should be against the law for anybody to speak, babble or cry until she's had her first cup of tea.
November 22, 2011 at 7:53
8 people like this
Dottie Harris might hit her husband with her slipper if he doesn't stop looking for pizza discount vouchers and just ORDER BLOODY DINNER!
November 22, 2011 at 20:17
6 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks if she hears “Wait wait Mummy, I want....SOMEFIN" at bedtime one more time she'll have to turn to alcohol. Oh.
November 23, 2011 at 19:03
6 people like this
Dottie Harris has just witnessed a full scale fight between the children. She thinks The Chubster won.
November 24, 2011 at 17:26
4 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks it’s a good job The Chubster is cute or she'd be leaving her at the charity shop today.
November 25, 2011 at 8:40
7 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks her children must really hate her. Is it bedtime yet?
November 27, 2011 at 8:01
2 people like this
Dottie Harris is singing and dancing around the kitchen (much to the kid’s bemusement). This can only mean one thing: SLEEP!!
November 28, 2011 at 8:39
6 people like this
Dottie Harris must learn not to eat brownies in front of the kids before they've finished their dinner. MELTDOWN! Rookie error.
November 28, 2011 at 17:01
7 people like this
Dottie Harris is beginning to think her obsession with taking photos of her food is a little unhealthy.
November 28, 2011 at 20:18
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has just gone back upstairs to see her son dressed in The Chubster’s swimming costume and his Spider-Man mask. As you do.
November 30, 2011 at 19:58
21 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks the 1st December means more than chocolate: Mince pies for breakfast.
December 1, 2011 at 8:30
11 people like this
Dottie Harris is quite impressed. She went Christmas shopping and didn't buy ANYTHING for herself.
December 1, 2011 at 19:20
7 people like this
Dottie Harris has 85mins until the kids go to bed.
December 2, 2011 at 17:34
3 people like this
Dottie Harris - 47...
December 2, 2011 at 18:12
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is going to change her name so she's no longer the centre of “Mummeeemummeemummee" chants.
December 4, 2011 at 14:29
3 people like this
Dottie Harris - Phrase I never thought I'd use: “Stop hitting your big brother with that hammer"
December 5, 2011 at 10:18
1 person likes this
Dottie Harris has had a very busy day, and is looking forward to having a glass of wine to celebrate 8 years with her lovely (most of the time) husband. X
December 6, 2011 at 19:29
32 people like this
Dottie Harris is having another discussion with The Monster about how she doesn't think he'll be getting a Baby Annabel for Christmas.
December 9, 2011 at 8:27
10 people like this
Dottie Harris has yet again been stared out of the last waffle by The Chubster. *sulks*
December 10, 2011 at 9:18
8 people like this
Dottie Harris is a bit lost with The Monster still in bed. Time for another cup of tea and cuddles with The Chubster then!
December 19, 2011 at 9:11
5 people like this
Dottie Harris has used the "Santa won't come if xxxx" bribe 5 times in the last 3 hours.
December 19, 2011 at 12:50
11 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks her husband is treading on dangerous ground. His response to why he didn't pick up chocolate when requested: “Well, I thought you'd want to be good all week". Hmm.
December 19, 2011 at 20:41
3 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks that there's a chocolate Penguin in the treats drawer with her name on it!
December 19, 2011 at 21:16
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is still deciding if she made the right decision agreeing with The Monster that his snowman was alive. Nightmares a go-go tonight?
December 22, 2011 at 19:33
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is wrapping presents for Santa. Unfortunately, the elves are going to have to go out and buy some more chocolate pennies. Not satsumas, there are plenty of those.
December 23, 2011 at 19:44
9 people like this
Dottie Harris can't believe the most stressful thing about making a tiramisu is finding a dish to put it in.
December 24, 2011 at 11:21
2 people like this
Dottie Harris needs to put a ban on noisy toys.
December 26, 2011 at 6:01
15 people like this
Dottie Harris has just hit rock bottom. Her 3 year old son has just let her win at “Snap”. “Quick Mummy, shout it before I do!EHHHHYYY MUMMY WON!"
December 27, 2011 at 18:01
15 people like this
Dottie Harris was nearly just KILLED by a strategically placed Transformer.
December 27, 2011 at 19:23
15 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks the Tooth Fairy is a bitch.
December 29, 2011 at 8:22
4 people like this
Dottie Harris has decided that Ice Age 3 is this morning’s designated babysitter.
December 30, 2011 at 10:28
8 people like this
Dottie Harris is counting down the minutes.
December 30, 2011 at 17:41
1 person likes this
Dottie Harris is more excited than The Monster about seeing the pantomime today! OH NO SHE ISN'T (Oh yes she is)
December 31, 2011 at 9:07
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is wishing all a Happy New Year x
December 31, 2011 at 21:57
8 people like this
2012
Dott
ie Harris can't believe her daughter broke her New Year’s Resolution of “LET MUMMY SLEEP ALL NIGHT" so quickly. Epic.Toddler.Fail.
January 1, 2012 at 6:41
4 people like this
Dottie Harris is playing pirates and treasure with The Monster. He’s finding the treasure (Quality Streets) and bringing them to her to eat.
January 2, 2012 at 14:08
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is looking forward to date night. Only 3 1/2 hours until the kids are well and truly dumped.
January 3, 2012 at 11:30
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is so not eating mince pies and drinking tea instead of ironing.
January 3, 2012 at 13:34
3 people like this
Dottie Harris - 22 minutes...
January 3, 2012 at 18:38
6 people like this
Dottie Harris would like to thank the grumpy Sainsbury's delivery man for bringing her a bottle of gin. (As part of my order, not as a present). It's going to be well used tonight judging by the current double child meltdown in the bath.
January 4, 2012 at 18:14
11 people like this
Dottie Harris is thinking “If you were a a 3-year-old’s PE kit and you weren't in your bag as expected and you weren't in the laundry, WHERE WOULD YOU BE?!”
January 5, 2012 at 7:08
8 people like this
Dottie Harris is suffering from too much party food from this afternoon’s toddler party.
January 7, 2012 at 17:56
1 person likes this
Dottie Harris is wondering why everyone is asleep except her. Perhaps the fact that there is a 3 year old hogging her side of the bed is part of the problem.
January 8, 2012 at 7:19
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is hyperventilating - kettle appears to be broken.
January 8, 2012 at 8:05
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is off to decide which school is unfortunate *cough* lucky enough to get The Monster in September. Sadly none of them have boarding facilities yet.
January 9, 2012 at 10:30
9 people like this
Dottie Harris can't believe she's having a "mARsk" vs "mASk" argument with a 3 year old. Again. North/South Divide already, REALLY?
January 9, 2012 at 17:08
6 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks today is going to be sponsored by Benefit Playstick foundation and coffee. Poor Chubs and her cough (and poor Mummy and her lack of sleep!)
January 10, 2012 at 6:57
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is thinking that “Gooood night sun, hello moon!” is the Best.Song.Ever.
January 10, 2012 at 18:01
15 people like this
Dottie Harris has a busy day, but first must remove some Brio carriages from her shoes.
January 11, 2012 at 8:45
9 people like this
Dottie Harris has gin.
January 11, 2012 at 19:03
11 people like this
Dottie Harris is meant to be working but instead is crying at One Born Every Minute.
January 12, 2012 at 14:34
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is still in bed. Sadly she's being body slammed by two fat children.
January 14, 2012 at 9:08
3 people like this
Dottie Harris and the gang are off to buy a goldfish.
January 14, 2012 at 11:26
6 people like this
Dottie Harris never realised that goldfish shopping would be so exhausting. Needing the exact shade of yellow was particularly trying.
January 14, 2012 at 15:43
9 people like this
Dottie Harris is relieved that Barry the fish is still alive.
January 15, 2012 at 9:12
13 people like this
Dottie Harris is pleased to be having gin instead of that soft drink malarky tonight.
January 16, 2012 at 19:28
3 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks that today is all about clearing out the room of doom. Baby section of eBay here I come!
January 17, 2012 at 9:08
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been told that she is to go to the hall for giving The Monster cheese on toast instead of cake. Can I take a gin with me?
January 17, 2012 at 16:39
13 people like this
Dottie Harris is looking forward to a time when nobody poos (then claps) at the dinner table.
January 17, 2012 at 17:01
9 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been punished for another rookie error: Letting The Chubster climb into the craft box. That's right. Play dough and moon sand are currently a little soggy.
January 18, 2012 at 18:03
4 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks her son would like to thank the general public for saving his life. If they hadn't been there to witness the whole "leaving soft play debacle/meltdown/screaming fit” he may not still be with us.
January 19, 2012 at 18:38
2 people like this
Dottie Harris thinks tea should be on the NHS for parents.
January 21, 2012 at 7:01
11 people like this
Dottie Harris is in the process of deciding how to redecorate the bedroom. Don't tell her husband though, he's blissfully unaware.
January 21, 2012 at 20:43
5 people like this
Dottie Harris wishes her poorly baby would get better fast :(
January 24, 2012 at 23:19
2 people like this
Dottie Harris has just been told she's wrong and The Monster is ALWAYS right. This is not how it’s meant to work in this house!
January 25, 2012 at 16:58
4 people like this
Dottie Harris and The Chubster are currently not on speaking terms due to the incredible dinner bowl throwing incident.
January 26, 2012 at 17:24
6 people like this
Dottie Harris hasn't just eaten the last of her daughter’s Christmas chocolate. Nope. Not at all.
January 26, 2012 at 20:08
5 people like this
Dottie Harris Monster: Mummy I don't want to be Fireman Sam anymore..
Me: Ok, you don't have to be.
Monster: YEAH I do! Lottie said.
Me: You don't have to do everything Lottie says!
Monster: YEAH I DO! She told me!
January 27, 2012 at 8:23
2 people like this
Dottie Harris loves hearing The Chubster chattering away through the baby monitor. X
January 28, 2012 at 19:33
7 people like this
Dottie Harris is still sulking. JUST because her birthday is on the same day as Mother's Day, it appears her presents are all merging together. Not sure this is acceptable husband behaviour?!
January 29, 2012 at 10:08
5 people like this
Dottie Harris is making prawn vindaloo and pretending naan bread is low fat.
January 30, 2012 at 20:02
3 people like this
Dottie Harris is too sleepy for a running commentary. ”Mummy, is this your bed? Mummy, your eyes are closed. Mummy, you're missing Thomas. Mummy, do you like it when I do that? Mummy, I can hear singing. Mummy, you have smelly mouth. Mummy, I need a wee. What's that noise, Mummy? Mummy, it's dark in the hall. Mummy, I've turned your light on. Mummy, I flushed the chain but I didn't need to wash my hands". *weeps*
January 31, 2012 at 6:39
6 people like this
Dottie Harris is very proud of her little Chubster. She FINALLY took some steps at nursery today! HURRAH!
February 1, 2012 at 17:37
19 people like this
Dottie Harris is thinking of quiet things she can do to entertain the children until bath time, it's a bit chilly to lock them in the garage.