Devil in the Deep Blue Sea

by A. J. Markam

  She’d squirted as she came.

  We screamed and grunted and groaned a few seconds more, and then she collapsed on top of me, entirely spent.

  “YAAAAAAY!” all the mermaids screamed, and slapped their tails against the water.

  Another reclining ovation.

  28

  We were all lying around afterwards in post-orgasmic bliss when I asked Oceana a question.

  “Where are all the mermen?”

  She made a face. “We don’t like mermen that much.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because they’re soooo concerned with their hair,” one mermaid complained.

  “And how beautiful they look,” another one chimed in.

  “And how muscular they are.”

  “And they don’t have the best parts of human males,” Oceana smiled as she stroked my cock.

  Which made me start to get hard again – but I was still curious enough to ask, “You have your… uh, ‘pleasure centers’ between your breasts, right?”

  There was no visible difference between their breasts and human women’s, but I’d seen ample evidence that tittyfucking was a LOT more pleasurable for mermaids.

  “Oh yes,” Oceana said.

  All the mermaids nodded and smiled.

  “And the mermen don’t have cocks?”

  “No.”

  “Then how do you have an orgasm with them?”

  “We don’t,” Oceana said dourly. “Rarely, anyways.”

  “They could use their hands and their tongues,” the Indian mermaid muttered, “but they won’t.”

  “They’re too busy flexing their muscles and rubbing lotions into their hair,” another mermaid griped.

  “If they don’t have cocks, and you don’t like having sex with them, then how do you have mer-babies?”

  “Oh my Goddess, Ian,” Alaria groaned.

  “What?”

  “Talking about having babies? Seriously? You’re totally ruining the mood.”

  I’d forgotten that babies were a buzzkill for Alaria. In fact, they were probably her biggest fear. Krakens weren’t even a close second.

  Actually, marriage probably was…

  “Oh yeah. Sorry.”

  “No, it’s alright,” Oceana said, mistaking my apology and totally unaware of how uncomfortable my succubus was about the topic. “We become uncontrollably lustful during mating season, and that’s when we have sex with the mermen. Even though it’s not particularly pleasurable for us.”

  I frowned. “How do they…?”

  “Fertilize us? By entering our cloaca.”

  Cloaca… why does that sound familiar?

  Oh yeah – like the Nagas’ naughty bits in their tails.

  Seemed to be a recurring theme amongst underwater denizens with fish- and snake tails.

  “You can… fuck us there if you wish,” Oceana said hesitantly, reaching down to the base of her scaly bottom half. “We don’t really enjoy it, but if you want to – ”

  “NO! No, I’m good, tittyfucking is great!” I said hurriedly.

  I had no desire to expand my repertoire to fish-fucking, too.

  All the mermaids sighed in relief, so I guess we were all on the same page.

  “So, the mermen… fertilize you… and then you have mer-babies?” I asked.

  Alaria huffed in indignation, but didn’t say anything to stop me.

  “Yes,” Oceana answered. “After mating season, we go our separate ways from the males and raise our young on our own.”

  I looked around the cave. “Why aren’t there any kids around, then?”

  “Mating season is only once every 20 years. We’re about to enter it in a couple of days. That’s why we were so… enthusiastic today,” she said with a smile as she continued to stroke my cock. “After mating season, we will give birth and raise our young.”

  Holy crap, what luck!

  I’d stumbled into a bunch of young, horny sea-babes right before they became preggo.

  “And then you have the babies, and they swim around with you?”

  “Yes.”

  “What about the kraken, though?”

  “What about it?” Oceana said as she leaned over to kiss my cock.

  The other mermaids were stirring, too, watching lustfully.

  “Uhhh…” I murmured, finding it hard to keep my train of thought. “You guys can outrun the kraken, right?”

  “Oh, yes. Easily.”

  “What about your babies?”

  “Newborns can swim even faster than us.”

  “Oh,” I said, surprised. “Then the only ones who have anything to worry about are the fishermen, then.”

  “I suppose.”

  “What’s the kraken going to do to them?”

  She shrugged. “Destroy their boats. Maybe their village.”

  I stared at her. “It’s going to destroy their village?!”

  “Maybe. If it gets bored. It won’t do it just because I didn’t get sacrificed,” she said tartly.

  Despite what barbaric assholes the fishermen had been, I didn’t feel so good about leaving a gigantic aquatic monster around to slaughter a village. Especially if there were women and children.

  “Maybe we should…” I started to say, then stopped as I got an incredible idea.

  “Maybe we should what?” Alaria asked warily, thinking I was about to go the Kill the kraken route.

  I turned to Oceana as she kissed up and down my shaft. “Could I ask you a favor?”

  She looked up at me in surprise.

  “You saved my life – I would do anything for you.” She winced. “Do you… want to go inside my cloa– ”

  “NO! No, I’m good with oral and tits. But I have an idea, and it will only work with your help.”

  “Anything for you,” Oceana whispered, keeping eye contact as she started to lick my cock.

  “Uhhhh… I’ll ask you about it later,” I murmured, unable to take my eyes off her.

  The other mermaids gathered around and began to touch me and Alaria.

  “Thank GODDESS,” Alaria grumbled, and seized a mermaid boob in each hand. “Less talking and more fucking.”

  There was a lot more fucking after that. And not much talking until it was over.

  29

  And that was how we wound up speeding towards the Sea of Death, accompanied by mermaids and chased by the kraken.

  The mermaids had signed on right away – mostly because Alaria and I had saved them, but also because my plan would potentially remove the kraken from their lives forever. Which meant no more sacrificial offerings by asshole fishermen.

  After we finished our orgy, Alaria and I retrieved Stig (who was NOT happy about his lack of promised alcohol).

  “Soon, I swear,” I said. “But there’s no place to get it out here except from those asshole fishermen, and they’d probably try to kill us.”

  “They can kill you as long as I get my booze,” Stig grumbled.

  Then the three of us went back into the water, where Oceana and several other mermaids grabbed me and Alaria by our arms and spirited us away through the water. They could swim even faster than the dolphins had.

  “This is weird,” Stig muttered as he rode on the back of a mermaid, holding her pigtails in his tiny hands like reins.

  “Trust me, it’ll all be worth it,” I called back to him.

  We found the kraken at the bottom of a reef far out to sea.

  When visible from head to toe, it was even more terrifying that what I’d glimpsed near the shore. Imagine a king crab’s body – a Guinness Book World Record motherfucker with a leg-span of six feet or more. Now slap some octopus tentacles on there between the legs. Now put a humanoid torso on top of that, along with a snapping turtle’s head, and cover everything in snakeskin.

  Now scale all of that up to a hundred feet tall.

  Yeah.

  Fucked up.

  Although the kraken was fairly chill at the moment. Its hit points had completely regenera
ted back to 2 million, and it was just kind of milling around aimlessly.

  Time to rile it up again.

  “Hey, ugly!” I yelled as I zapped it with Soul Suck.

  The kraken immediately roared in fury and started after us.

  Our mermaid rides took off through the water, hauling ass (or fin?) and keeping us about a hundred feet ahead of the kraken.

  Every so often the kraken would get bored and lose interest, then kind of stop and wander off. So I would zap it with Soul Suck to make it mad enough to follow us again.

  That continued for almost four hours – zapping, running, zapping, running.

  And then we came to Zali’s underwater city of Fathmos.

  You should have seen the Naga and the nymph soldiers’ expressions as the kraken came up over the ridge. All the fighting around the city stopped, and then every single Warrior ran for the hills.

  The religious protestors, too. They just scattered like cockroaches and fled the city gates.

  I wasn’t exactly sure if my plan would work, but there was no backing out now.

  “Swim up above the city!” I told the mermaids. “There’s an invisible force field over it, so you’re going to have to aim pretty high – but make sure you go directly above the center!”

  The mermaids followed my orders and swam up over the center of Fathmos.

  The kraken followed us right up to the city wall. Then it tried to walk over the wall and found it could not.

  The kraken seemed puzzled, like a puppy encountering a pane of glass for the first time. It tapped lightly at the shield with one of its segmented legs, then harder – but all its efforts were rebuffed.

  Then it seemed to lose interest and began to wander away again.

  “Drop me off down by the wall!” I ordered.

  “Are you sure?” Oceana asked worriedly.

  “Yes!”

  She set me down by the city’s curved white wall.

  “Now get out of here!” I ordered as I cranked up my spells.

  Soul Suck zapped one of the kraken’s tentacles. The monster howled and turned back towards me.

  “Come onnnnn!” I yelled at it, channeling Heath Ledger as the Joker. “Hit me! I WANT you to hit me!”

  Unlike Batman, the kraken didn’t hesitate.

  One of its tentacles lashed straight out at me –

  And slammed THROUGH me against the wall.

  I died immediately, but because my last Gravesite had been destroyed on the shoreline, I resurrected in Fathmos’s graveyard.

  When I came to, I could see the kraken towering over the city.

  The section of wall its tentacle had hit was reduced to rubble.

  And because of that, the shield was down. I could tell because the kraken was entering the city, its gargantuan crab legs destroying building after building as it advanced.

  My plan had worked.

  “HA!” I crowed as I raced through the streets towards the breach in the wall.

  All that was left now was to lure the kraken to Zali’s villa – have it destroy the sculpture garden, thereby reducing the hatchetfish’s hit points –

  And I would finally be able to kill Zali!

  YES!

  As I raced by the villa, Zali came out of his front door, alarmed.

  “Eee-an, what ees happening?” he cried out.

  I laughed as I sped by. “You’re about to go DOWN!”

  Zali looked up at the kraken advancing through the city streets. His jaw dropped open, his face looked terrified –

  And then he did something completely unexpected.

  The little fucker shot up through the water like Mighty Mouse.

  “I weel save you, Eee-an!” he cried out as he raced towards the kraken.

  WHAT?!

  Ah shit, now I just felt bad.

  “Wait!” I cried out. “What are you doing?!”

  “I weel save you! I weel save you all!” he shouted.

  Yeah… not gonna happen, dude.

  Zali was more powerful than me, yes, but there was no way he could take out a 2 million hit point monster on his own.

  Oh well.

  Maybe the kraken would save me the effort of killing him myself.

  Zali zoomed straight towards the kraken’s upper belly, a guppy heading for a Great White.

  The kraken looked down at the tiny creature approaching and ROARED.

  Zali sped right to the monster’s middle – and stopped.

  “I teeckle your belly!” he yelled, and began to wiggle one finger against the kraken’s stomach.

  …whuuuuut?

  The kraken looked down in confusion. I think it was just as surprised as I was at the change of events.

  “I teeckle your belly!” Zali shouted again, now wiggling all his fingers against the kraken’s stomach.

  And then…

  Amazingly…

  The kraken began to snort.

  And chuckle.

  And giggle.

  It was a monster’s laughter, so it sounded more like HRR-HRR-HRRRR, but it was definitely laughing.

  “Yessss, you are a good kraken, no? I teeckle your belly, I teeckle your belly!” Zali said in the same voice you’d use playing with a puppy.

  And the kraken loved it. It was tossing its head back and forth happily, and waved its tentacles like it was having the time of its life.

  The kraken wasn’t the only one who loved it, either.

  The Naga warriors all emerged from their hiding places in the town and gave the warlock a standing ovation.

  I came to a halt directly below Zali and the kraken.

  “What the FUCK, man?!” I yelled angrily.

  Zali looked down from 50 feet above me. “What ees wrong, Eee-an? I have saved you! I have saved Fathmos, no?”

  “You weren’t SUPPOSED to save me or Fathmos! I brought that thing here to wreck your fucking garden!”

  “Well, that ees not very nice,” Zali sniffed.

  “‘Very NICE’?! I’m trying to KILL you!”

  “Ohhhhh – I see!” Zali said, and burst out into a grin. “Your plan ees very clever, I must admeet. Well done, Eee-an! Well d– ”

  Only problem was, he’d stopped tickling the kraken’s belly.

  It wasn’t entertained any more.

  And its sights centered on me – the annoying little pest who’d been zapping it the last four hours.

  The monster lifted up one colossal crab leg and brought down the pointed tip right on my head.

  Dead.

  Immediately.

  I came to in the graveyard and raced back out into the street to find an even weirder scene.

  “No, no, bad kraken!” Zali scolded the monster. “We must not keel Ee-an!”

  The kraken looked abashed, like it had done something wrong.

  “Awww… you are a good kraken, no?” the warlock relented, and began rubbing its fingers on the kraken’s belly again. “I teeckle your belly, I teeckle your belly!”

  The kraken started chortling again and waving its tentacles happily.

  If Zali wanted to play with his new pet, then he could distract the kraken and I would go after him. Fine by me.

  I threw out my hand. Fifty tiny demons flew out of my sleeve, and Chain of Darkness wrapped around Zali.

  -750

  -743

  -735

  Wait – what the fuck?!

  Last time his damage had been in the 600’s!

  I checked his stats again. Don’t tell me the little bastard –

  Zali – Warlock

  Level 48

  Health: 72,772 out of 75,000

  GOD DAMMIT!

  He’d leveled up AGAIN!

  “Eee-an, what are you do-eeng?!” Zali called out plaintively.

  “KEEELING YOU!” I shouted.

  Of course, now that Zali was distracted, the kraken wasn’t getting tickled anymore.

  I was watching for its crab legs – but I didn’t see the giant tentacle that snaked around the buildi
ngs behind me.

  WHOMP.

  Dead again.

  I resurrected and ran back to the kraken.

  “Eee-an, Eee-an, let us stop thees pointless fight-eeng!” Zali called down. “Come een-side my garden and I weel show you my new sculptures, no?”

  “NO!” I yelled in frustration as I continued to attack him.

  Kraken leg again.

  WHOMP.

  I came to in the graveyard and ran as fast as I could down the street –

  And saw the villa on my left, completely unguarded.

  YES!

  I darted inside and raced through it to the sculpture garden.

  I started blasting the first sculpture I came to, a ten-foot-tall penis with a disembodied hand jacking it off.

  “Yes, yes, destroy it!” the motionless succubi and incubi cheered me on.

  “Blast it to dust!”

  “Free us, PLEASE!”

  I was more than happy to oblige.

  The giant marble penis shattered into rubble.

  I got some sympathy pains in my balls, but I moved on to the next sculpture.

  And then I heard Zali’s voice screaming as he swam frantically overhead. “Eee-an, Eee-an, NO! I cannot allow you to destroy my art!”

  “TOO BAD!” I yelled as I hit a giant puckered marble asshole with Darkfire.

  That’s when Zali let loose on me.

  Dead.

  Again.

  I came back at least 20 more times and tried a variety of ways to defeat the little warlock: attacking him. Attacking his sculpture. Trying to get the kraken to kill him.

  And no matter what, I failed.

  Every. Single. Time.

  Death by Zali.

  Death by kraken.

  Death by giant puckered marble asshole falling over on top of me. (I don’t want to talk about that one.)

  Finally I gave up.

  “You win,” I called out dejectedly. “I’m leaving.”

  “Stay, Eee-an! Stay and play weeth the kraken, no?”

  “No,” I grumbled, and walked out through the ruins of the city wall.

  All around me, Naga warriors were applauding Zali.

  The nymphs grudgingly stood there waiting for the Naga to finish.

  Then, as though realizing they all had work to do, they picked up their weapons and started fighting each other again.

  I slogged my way through the groups of fighting soldiers until I reached Alaria, Stig, and the mermaids waiting at the edge of the battlefield. They all watched sympathetically as I trudged over, utterly dejected.