Turning Grace

by J. Q. Davis

  “Hey, it’s okay. Mrs. Turner is tough.”

  “No really. Thanks Grace.”

  I felt the heat flush my face and ears, hoping it wouldn’t show. “You’re welcome.”

  He smiled and leaned in to give me a hug. My body froze, struggling to keep my composure. My legs could turn into Jell-O at any minute and I could fall to my knees. I hugged him back and took one big whiff of his scent.

  He pulled away too soon, and walked down the steps of my porch as I slowly shut the door. Before I could shut it all the way, he yelled out my name.

  “Hey Grace!”

  I opened the door. The butterflies in my stomach were having a party.

  “You look beautiful today!”

  I thought my heart had just fallen out of my butt.

  He smiled wide, flashing his flawless teeth and turned around to disappear into his mother’s car. I watched them drive down the street and turn at the corner. When I closed the door, I fell back into it, letting every moment of today sink into my mind. And chuckled at the cliché movie moment I was having. Sure, he tortured me today. Sure, my mother tried to sabotage my date. Sure, I fought the battle between food and my stomach. Sure, I made a complete fool out of myself for pretty much asking him out. But I didn’t care. The only thing that mattered to me at that moment was that he reacted. He reacted and it was the reaction that I wanted. It was the reaction that proved that there was something. The reaction that proved he thought about me more than just a study buddy. It was the reaction that meant war.

  With that mission accomplished, my next mission was to confront my mother.

  My stomach made a loud gurgle and I looked down at it.

  Okay, food…then Mom.

  Chapter 5

  The Threat

  I peeled myself away from the front door and the thoughts of Tristen’s sweet smile and headed towards the kitchen. All of the plates were still pretty much full. During our study session, I managed to ingest enough food to hold me over, without convincing Tristen that I was some kind of freak. I paced myself and daintily picked the smallest pieces on the plate. It was tough, but I managed. Now I was beginning to starve again, and I needed some food…now.

  I sat down at the dinner table and without any thought, dug into every dish. It was cold and dry, but I could still taste the delicious herbs and spices. Before I knew it, everything was gone and I wanted more.

  “Still hungry, Gracie?” Mom walked into the kitchen as if she read my mind. I looked over at her, still pissed from her behavior that afternoon.

  I nodded and looked away.

  She walked over the refrigerator and before she pulled out the dish covered in aluminum foil, I could smell the roast.

  “I knew you would want more.” She uncovered the container and a whiff of tender meat whipped around my head. I needed it...

  “Mom, you can just bring that over here. I don’t mind it cold,” I said, trying not to sound anxious. She looked over at me in confusion.

  She stared at me for a moment before walking over to the silverware drawer. She pulled out a fork and brought the dish over to the table. I watched every movement, every step she took, anticipating the moment I can savor the glorious pot roast. She set it down in front of me and I dug into it, not able to hold off any longer.

  Without a word, she left the room and headed upstairs. Was she mad at me? At the moment, I didn’t really care. Food was more important. But I knew I needed to finish up quickly and go have a talk with her.

  When I finished, which was all too soon, I prepared my speech and headed upstairs to her bedroom. I needed to know why she tried to sabotage my study date. Why would she purposely try to embarrass me in front of Tristen? Maybe she was unaware of my sudden uncontrollable yearning for food. But how could she forget the episode just the night before? And about that…I needed to ask her what was wrong with me. She was a doctor, she should at least have some idea as to why I had been feeling…different lately.

  And what about the pomegranate juice? I knew she said she made a fresh batch last night. How could it have all been gone? I had never seen her drink it before. As a matter of fact, I could remember her saying it was too sweet for her, and that she prefered something less sugary.

  I made my way to her bedroom and knocked on the door. When she didn’t answer, I slowly opened the door into darkness. She was asleep. Great. I closed the door quietly and headed into my bedroom, making mental notes of all of my questions. I will just have to ask her in the morning.

  The following day, I awoke to the smell of bacon, sausage, and the usual aromas of a breakfast feast. Before I knew it, I was throwing the covers off of me and heading down the stairs. I was starved.

  I entered the kitchen to find dishes full of my much loved breakfast foods…and a note. I grabbed a piece of bacon and the note.

  Gracie,

  I had to head out early to work. As you can see, breakfast is made and lunch is already in your bag for school.

  I will see you this afternoon. Please be sure to eat your breakfast and your lunch today.

  I love you.

  Mom.

  Huh…well she certainly didn’t have to worry about me finishing breakfast.

  Phoebe smacked me on the arm when I met her in our usual spot for our walk to school. “Why didn’t you call me last night after your date!” she yelled.

  “Ouch!”

  “Sorry,” she apologized.

  “Phoebe! I was just tired.”

  “So, did you guys…you know,” she wiggled her eyebrows up and down.

  It was my turn to smack her on the arm. “No! It wasn’t like that.”

  “Ouch!” she smiled and smacked me again. “So what was it like?”

  I rubbed my arm, again, and smiled. My heart began the race as the memory of sitting so close to Tristen flooded my mind. “We just…studied.”

  “That’s it?” Phoebe asked. I knew she would be disappointed. In her mind, Tristen would have walked into the house, thrown me on the kitchen table, and had his way with me. Although that scenario didn’t sound too bad, my version would have included the food laid out over everything. Maybe he would be feeding some to me? I smiled again.

  “And you’re okay with that?”

  “Okay with what?” I lost my train of thought.

  “G, you had the hottest guy in school, the guy that you have been daydreaming about for like, ever, at your house…and you didn’t make a move?” This was preposterous to Phoebe. She was not some easy chick, but she would have at least made it to first base with him.

  “Well Phoebe, not all of us have the guts that you do. I couldn’t just make out with him right there in my kitchen…when my mother is keeping one eye on us.”

  “Oh, right. Mom was there. So, was there at least some flirting going on?” She sounded defeated, but hopeful.

  “You can say that.” I smiled. “He told me I was beautiful.”

  Phoebe shoved me. “Get out!”

  I wanted to punch her for hitting that same arm for the third time, but I couldn’t help the grin creeping across my face. Tristen Miles thought I was beautiful.

  “So, are you guys gonna hang out again?”

  “He asked me about Halloween.”

  “Is he coming with us?” She could not contain herself any longer.

  “Well, I sort of asked him to. I’m sorry, Phoebe. I know it’s normally just me and you. It just kind of came out. He probably won’t even—”

  “No! It’s perfect. Eric wants to come hang out with us too. It’ll be a double date!”

  A double date. A date. A real date with Tristen. This concept sent the butterflies in my belly on a rampage and I held on to that thought as we approached our day at school.

  The day dragged on, as usual, but I could not help the sappy grin across my face. I didn’t see Tristen until calculus. We walked through the door almost at the same time. When we were nearly touching each other, he leaned in and whispered into my ear, “Good luck”. The sme
ll of his minty breath cooled my senses and the feel of it sent tingles down my spine. Those two words flowed through me like silk as I fought through the urge to fall into his arms.

  “Good luck,” was all I could manage to respond.

  I was happy. I knew Tristen was going to ace this test and it was because of me. I will have saved him from failing and from getting kicked off the swim team. It would be because of my weird math genius that he will be in a great mood today.

  After roll call and about thirty minutes of answering lingering questions students had regarding the material, Mrs. Turner handed out our tests and started the clock. This test was a piece of cake, and I knew I could probably ace it with my eyes closed. I was the top in our class, and knew everyone hated me in some way because math came so easily to me. For a moment, I wondered why I never started tutoring sessions for students. It would have been a great way to make some cash on the side.

  Half way through completing the test, a sharp pain shot across my belly. My reflexes forced me to clench onto my stomach and I winced. Julie, the cute little red head who sat next to me, looked over in my direction and noticed my pained expression.

  “Grace,” she whispered. “You okay?”

  I turned to her, nodded, and glanced back down at my paper. I was getting the hunger pains again. I looked up at the clock. Only thirty more minutes till lunch. Clenching down tighter onto my belly, I tried to force myself to only think about this test. The definite integral. I just explained this to Tristen last night, this was simple.

  But as I prepared to work out the equations in my mind I…I couldn’t. I couldn’t figure it out. I couldn’t remember how the do the problem, or even what the definite integral meant. It was as though my mind became confused, unable to understand. And as if that weren’t bad enough, the numbers and letters began to intertwine into one and I could no longer make out what it said. I glanced out onto the rest of the classroom, watching everyone else struggling to answer the questions. But not for the same reasons.

  They began spinning. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and looked back down at the test. That didn’t help. The pain worsened and I hunched over. I squinched my eyes together, trying hard to focus. My head began to throb and my eyesight was blurring. I caught a glimpse of my book bag on the floor from the corner of my eye. Suddenly, the faint aroma of roast beef and turkey made its way to my nose. It seemed I suddenly developed x-ray vision. As if I could see straight through my book bag. I could see the sandwich and the rest of my lunch inside a paper bag, waiting to be eaten. My mouth watered and I forced myself to return my focus to the test.

  “Five minute warning,” Mrs. Turner said from her desk. My head shot up. How did twenty-five minutes already fly by? I was only half way done!

  I glanced over at Tristen. He looked pretty confident. I wasn’t sure if that made me feel better or worse.

  Okay, I can do this, I told myself. I set my elbows down on the desk and ran my fingers through my hair. Something felt weird. I pulled my hands back down and gasped. A chunk of my hair was in my palm. I quickly tightened my hand into a fist to hide it. I looked around to see if anyone else noticed. I had to get out of there. I grabbed my bag and my test and made my way to Mrs. Turner’s desk.

  “I’m sorry Mrs. Turner. I have to go.” My voice was hoarse.

  “Grace, are you okay?”

  I ignored her as I made my way to the door. The bell rang right before I made it there and as I reached to turn the knob, darkness overcame me.

  ~ ~ ~ ~

  My eyes fluttered open. The smell of alcohol was burning my nose.

  “There you go. Wake up for me Grace.” A soft female voice spoke into my left ear. I looked over to see Nurse Nancy sitting next to me waving something around my nose. I didn’t want to be rude, but the smell was about to make me gag. I gently pushed her arm away and she got the hint.

  “How are you feeling, dear?” Nurse Nancy was a stout woman. She was older and had a quality about her. Like she was once very beautiful, but it seemed the years had not been kind to her. She knew her work well and seemed to have been doing it for a long time. She knew when a student was faking an illness and would kick them out of her office in a heartbeat. But if they really were ill, she was kind and sweet and very nurturing.

  I stared up at the ceiling for a moment before attempting to sit up. I had to pull myself together. There was a slight pain in my stomach, but not quite as bad as before. My hands shot up to my head, feeling around to make sure my hair was all still there. To my relief, it was.

  “Wh…what happened?” I could barely speak. The sterile paper I was lying on crunched as I sat up.

  “You fainted,” Nurse Nancy said as she jotted something down on her documents in front of her. “Do you faint often? Did you recently fall injuring your head? Do you feel nauseous at all?”

  I shook my head no to all of her questions, trying hard not to move too much. It was still throbbing, but not too bad.

  “Did you eat breakfast this morning?”

  “Yes,” I mumbled.

  “Well, sometimes if we are really hungry and don’t eat, or if we don’t eat enough, we can began to feel bad or queasy or even faint. I don’t see any other signs that point to this being something serious. Maybe you just didn’t eat enough this morning. I had an IV hooked up to you for a little bit while you were out, just to get some fluids in you.”

  “Did you call my…mom?” I asked. I knew she would freak if she didn’t know something like this happened.

  “We did call your mother. She is actually in the front office getting you checked out for the day. You should go home and rest a little. Get a good meal or two in. But take it easy for the rest of the day. I don’t think you have a concussion, but just in case. I’m going to update your mom in a minute and recommend making a doctor’s appointment, just to make sure your fainting spell today isn’t anything more serious.”

  She closed what I was assuming to be my file and walked over to me. She took my vitals before heading towards the door.

  “I am going to let your mom know you are awake.”

  I nodded and she left the room.

  Well this was wonderful, I didn’t finish my test. This would be the first time in the history of my schooling that I was not able to finish a test or possibly flunk it. I had never made a mark lower than a B in my life! And in math! Out of all—

  Oh.My.God. I passed out…in class…in front of Tristen.

  I dropped my head into my hands and fought the urge to cry. I couldn’t decide what was worse…falling and showing my holey granny panties to the entire school a few years ago…or fainting in front of Tristen. I pictured myself passing out, probably hitting the ground hard, arms and legs completely sprawled out with my mouth wide open, tongue hanging out, and drool oozing onto the floor.

  Yeah…I guess both instances were just as mortifying as the other.

  There was a knock on the door of the small, hospital-like room. Great, I had to deal with my mother. For some reason, I knew she would blame me for what happened. I was sure she was thinking that I didn’t eat enough breakfast. The truth was, I ate it all…and then some. I actually didn’t feel full after my bacon, sausage, pancakes, hash browns, eggs, and pigs in a blanket, so I ate a dish of left over pasta.

  Before I got out of the cot to open the door, it swung open.

  “Grace?”

  I paused, not quiet believing who was standing in the doorway.

  “Sonny?”

  She smiled and walked in, shutting the door behind her. I wasn’t sure if I was frightened or nervous. This couldn’t be good.

  “Hi Grace,” she said in a soft, almost too kind voice. I pulled my eyebrows together, trying to understand why she was in here.

  She sashayed over to the chair next to the cot. I watched her intently, expecting her to pull out a shank to attack me with. I braced myself.

  “How are you feeling?” Her question almost sounded genuine, which confused me even more. I
was silent, hesitant to answer her. Finally I said, “Better.”

  “Good. You had us all worried.”

  Us? Who was she talking about? I glanced over at the door, planning a quick escape in my head. There was no way she was being serious. She had to have a shank hidden somewhere.

  “It’s okay silly.” She smiled, sensing my hesitation. “I just came to see if you were feeling well.”

  I was considering a thank you, but couldn’t let the words come out of my mouth. She sat back in the chair and began looking around on Nurse Nancy’s desk. She found a nail file and proceeded to file her nails. Was this some kind of joke?

  “When I heard that you passed out in class, I was really concerned…for several reasons. The first reason was that I was worried you might have hurt your head.” She giggled and shook her head. I knew that wasn’t true.

  “The second reason was that I thought I might have missed the free show you were giving everyone.” Her eyes lowered down to my legs. “But then I saw that you were wearing jeans, not a skirt. So…I didn’t miss much.”

  I knew this was going to get ugly. I grabbed onto the cot tightly, resisting the urge to swing.

  She continued filing. “The third reason was that I would miss my chance to ask you how last night went.” She looked up from her nails and stared straight into my eyes. I let go of the cot, feeling defeated. Crap. Of course she knew about last night. I was so caught up in the sweet moments Tristen and I shared that I didn’t even think twice about seeing Sonny the next day in school.

  “So, how did it go?” She leaned over in the chair as if awaiting the juiciest gossip she had ever heard.

  I took a deep breath, trying to somehow conjure up a lie. I could tell her that it didn’t happen. If I did that, and if Tristen had already told her that he came over last night, then he would look like a liar, which made no sense. It seemed like my only option here was to be honest.

  “It went fine. We studied,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. It was the truth, anyway. We did study.

  “Right.” She nodded slowly. “You helped him for his test today. I tried to call him, but he wouldn’t answer, which is weird ‘cause he always answers the phone for me. Why do you think he didn’t answer?”