Second Chances

by Carol Ashby

  Cornelia walked beside Hector through the orchard and past the side of Philip’s house. They turned into the garden at the rear and followed a path to a doorway that led into the courtyard surrounded by the wings of the house. A canvas canopy covered several rows of benches. Several braziers heated the space. Despite the cool weather, it was warm and inviting.

  Miriam and Claudia were talking when Hector’s party entered, but they broke off their conversation and came to Cornelia.

  Claudia wrapped her arm around Cornelia’s waist. “I’m so glad you decided to join us. Worship will start in a few minutes.” She pressed her lips together to squash a grin as she scanned Hector. “You’re welcome to sit with either of our families, but I think someone would rather you sit with him.”

  Cornelia turned her head to look up at the smiling man beside her. “I believe it’s proper manners to stay with the man who brought you.”

  Claudia and Miriam exchanged quick glances before Claudia replied. “I quite agree.”

  A young man who looked about seventeen strode toward them. He and Hector embraced before he turned a smile toward Cornelia.

  Hector draped his arm across the young man’s shoulders. “Cornelia, this is my son, Marcario.”

  Marcario’s eyes bounced from her to his father and back. A broad grin split his face. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, Cornelia.” His gaze shifted to Hector and back again. “I’m glad you and your daughter have kept Father from getting too bored while he’s in port for the winter.”

  The warm eyes of the friendly young man brought a gleam to her own. “Your father made our trip out from Rome a delight. Drusilla and I are very glad he’s continued to spend time with us.” She fixed her eyes on Hector. “I can think of no better way to spend our time than with Hector.”

  Hector let the smile her words inspired spread across face. No better way? There was no better way to spend time than with her. To hear her speak it aloud in front of her family and his own son―that was more than he’d expected.

  Philip strolled over to join them. “Welcome, Cornelia. I’m glad you’ve come.”

  “Hector tells me you’re an extraordinary teacher. I’m looking forward to learning much today.”

  Philip chuckled. “If Hector said that, he gave me more credit than I deserve. God himself gives me the message and guides my words. I’m just the tool the Holy Spirit uses.”

  Cornelia glanced at Hector before replying. “Perhaps those weren’t his exact words, but he said you were better than him. He was such a good teacher himself when we heard him on the ship that I have great expectations. He assured me I would begin to have all my questions answered.”

  Hector felt the heat in his ears. The suppressed laughter in Philip’s eye and the lips pressed to stop a grin as his best friend glanced at him didn’t help that at all.

  Philip nodded once at Cornelia. “That I am sure God will do. Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for me to ask the Spirit’s guidance before we begin.”

  Philip turned and walked to the stand at the podium where he’d already placed a codex.

  Hector touched her elbow, and she fixed eager eyes on him. “I hope you’ll sit with me and Marcario.” He waved his hand toward a bench.

  His heart warmed as she gazed up at him, her eyes glowing. “I’d like to do that. I may need you to answer my questions.”

  “Whatever you need, I’ll try to help.” The trust in her eyes was everything he could hope for.

  Drusilla slid her hand into his. Hector rested his free hand on her hair. “Come sit.”

  He settled down on the bench with Drusilla on one side and Cornelia on the other. His heart swelled. Beside him were the little girl he loved, and the woman he hoped might love him. Both were eager to learn about his Lord. Surely Cornelia would hear God’s call and choose to follow Jesus, just as he had done so many years ago.

  He glanced at her. Among the children of God, there was no Jew and Gentile, no Roman and Greek, no slave and free. If she chose the Lord, maybe all that separated a captain and a queen would no longer matter. He longed to see her saved for her own sake, but it might fulfill the desire of his heart as well.

  Anticipation unlike any she’d felt before filled Cornelia. Someone struck a lyre and sang a few words. A glorious blend of male and female voices joined in and wrapped around her. It was even better than the singing on the ship.

  After several songs, Philip raised the codex from the podium. The singing stopped, and the silence, like that between rolls of thunder, drove up her heart rate. An unfamiliar tingling coursed across her skin.

  Philip closed his eye and tipped his face skyward. “Dear Father, fill me today with your Holy Spirit that my words may bring honor to You and to my Lord Jesus.”

  He lowered the codex and beamed directly at Cornelia before he opened it to the place he’d marked.

  “Today, I’m going to read from Apostle Paul’s letter to the believers in Rome. He wrote this in a time not unlike our own, when Emperor Nero was hunting and killing the followers of Jesus.”

  His gaze locked onto the codex. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew, he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

  “What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all―how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?”

  Philip closed the codex and leaned with both hands on the podium.

  “In difficult times like these, under opposition and even threat of death, we can sometimes give in to fear and lose sight of God’s promises. It’s important for us to remember Paul’s words and to encourage each other in such times with remembrances of how we ourselves have seen God keep his promises.”

  His gaze settled on Titus and Miriam. “Any one of us here could tell of a time when God brought good out of something bad. God can use even the things that cause us deep pain to bring us good. And sometimes he uses those difficult times to soften our hearts and open our minds so we will hear His call.”

  Miriam lifted her eyes to Titus’s face as his turned down onto hers. The love that flowed between them, the joy they shared…it was everything Cornelia longed for with Hector. God truly had brought good from bad.

  “God knows who will hear that call to follow Jesus and be justified. We all remain sinners, because it’s impossible for any man or woman to live a perfect life. Only perfection is fit to be in God’s presence. God loves us and wants us to be with Him, but His very nature won’t let us be in His presence if we’re not perfect.”

  Cornelia’s mouth twitched. Perfect―hard even for the simplest things, impossible for the difficult things that mattered most.

  “So what did He do to satisfy both His love and His perfection? He took the form of a man Himself. He came to live among us as Jesus of Nazareth. He lived a perfect life as a man, and He sacrificed Himself on the cross to make payment for all the sins of all people for all time, the payment we as sinners could never make.

  “As proof that He could do everything He’d said, He rose from the dead. And when He had done all that, He had justified all who choose to believe in Him and in His sacrifice as clearing them of sin. It’s a legal judgment. We are justified, declared to be not guilty even though we really are guilty. We can never be innocent in our own right as long as we make choices to please ourselves, not God. And who doesn’t sometimes fail to put God first?”

  Cornelia glanced at Drusilla. Put her daughter first―she’d done that. But she’d never considered what God might think when making her choices.

  “But God the Father treats us as if we had the perfection of Jesus. He looks at us as if
we are fit to be in his presence because He paid for our sins Himself, something we never could do.

  “Jesus rose from the dead and appeared to His disciples as proof that He could do everything He’d told them. Then he sent His Holy Spirit to live within us, so we can have a small taste of His presence with us before we enjoy the full banquet of His glory in heaven after we die.”

  Hector’s nod and broad smile declared his agreement with all Philip was saying. There was a truth here that they all seemed to know, a truth Cornelia didn’t yet understand.

  “As Paul wrote, each of us here has been called to receive His great gift of justification. Most of us have answered yes to that call.” He fixed his glowing eye on Cornelia. “And some of us are just now hearing the call. Let us all pray that everyone called will say yes to His offer of justification and become a follower of our Lord Jesus. That will bring peace and joy in this world and even more in the next.”

  Philip stepped back from the podium and nodded to the man with a lyre. The musician strummed a few notes while he sang the first words of a song, then the entire assembly joined their voices in praise again.

  As the music wrapped around Cornelia, her mind focused on how God could use anything for good. Even evil acts by selfish people...like Lucius.

  Lucius’s first cruel decision put Claudia on Hector’s ship, where she and Philip met. Their blissful marriage would never have happened without Lucius. Then came Lucius’s horrible decision that would have hurt Drusilla. That was bad, but it led to the good of them being on Hector’s ship. Drusilla found a man who loved her like a father, and she found the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. God was certainly bringing good out of evil.

  But there was still more good in coming to Thracia than finding Hector. If she hadn’t left Rome, she would never have come to understand why Publius chose death over denial. If she hadn’t been on Hector’s ship, she would never have been with Christians worshipping. She felt the pull on her heart more every time she came to their gatherings.

  Was that God calling her to Him? She was almost ready to answer yes to that call. It was time to talk with Claudia, ask the questions she had that were too personal to ask Hector or Philip, and make a decision.

  That night, Cornelia leaned on her elbows and gazed into the mirror. Anthusa pulled the gold pins and Cornelia’s coiled braid tumbled down her back. As Anthusa’s fingers began working the strands of the braid apart, Cornelia closed her eyes. A happy smile accompanied a satisfied sigh.

  “I so enjoyed the worship at Philip’s this morning.”

  “So did I, mistress.”

  “As much as I loved sitting with Hector, that wasn’t the best part. I’m beginning to understand why Publius made his choice. I understood some when Hector taught. I understand even more after listening to Philip. But it’s more than just understanding. I can’t explain it, but it’s like something is pulling me toward believing Jesus did everything he said.”

  “I feel that same pull.”

  “Before next Sunday, I’ll ask Claudia why she decided to become a believer. Her faith seems so strong. There must have been more to her decision than becoming a believer just so Philip would marry her.”

  Anthusa kept brushing. She was almost finished when Mistress Cornelia’s eyes in the mirror turned dreamy.

  “Of course, I did so enjoy sitting with Hector, almost like we were family. His son was so welcoming. I’m sure he’ll be happy for his father if we marry. I know Drusilla would be ecstatic.”

  Anthusa set the brush down on the table and ran her fingers through the flowing hair. “Maybe that’s exactly what will happen, mistress. Time will tell.”

  Cornelia strolled to her bed and sat down. “Yes, time. There’s still more than three months before he starts sailing again.” She swung her legs up on the bed, and Anthusa drew the sheets up to her chin.

  “Three months is a long time. I’m sure it will be enough.”

  “I hope so.” Cornelia’s eyes drifted shut.

  Anthusa blew out the lamp and stood for a moment gazing at her beloved mistress. The captain looked at the mistress with eyes filled with both love and longing. Surely three months would be enough.

  Chapter 40: A Desirable Woman

  Drusilla and Vania were playing in the garden when Quintus Lepidus rode through the gate. Drusilla dashed through the kitchen door and upstairs to the women’s room where Cornelia was weaving.

  Cornelia startled at her daughter’s breathless arrival. “Is something wrong, dear?”

  Drusilla took a big breath before answering. “A man in a purple-striped tunic just rode into the garden.”

  Cornelia’s heart skipped a beat. “Did you recognize him?”

  Drusilla gripped Cornelia’s hand. “It’s the man you talked to when we were driving with Captain.”

  “Quintus Lepidus?” Drusilla nodded. “That shouldn’t be a problem for us. Hector said he wasn’t likely to let anyone in Rome know about us. Remember?”

  “But why did he come here?”

  “He said he planned to look at a couple of Titus’s colts. Since the animals aren’t here, he’ll be disappointed.”

  A servant appeared at the doorway. “Mistress, Quintus Lepidus is asking to speak with you.”

  Cornelia’s brows shot up. “Escort him to the sitting room and tell him I’ll be there shortly.”

  Drusilla’s gaze shifted from the departing servant to Cornelia.

  “Don’t worry, dear. Remember what the captain said about him being a decent man. Lepidus did say he wanted to hear about the happenings in Rome. I’m sure it’s just that.”

  Cornelia parked the shuttle and reached for Drusilla’s hand. “You can go back to Vania, and I’ll entertain our visitor.”

  After descending the stairs, Cornelia took a deep breath before entering the sitting room where Lepidus waited. How should she update him on events in Rome without making him curious enough to inquire about her situation from his brothers?

  She donned her gracious social face as she glided into the room. As she settled on a chair, she waved her upturned palm to invite him to sit as well. “Aemilius Lepidus. What a pleasant surprise. To what do I owe such pleasure?”

  “I was passing by and thought I should stop to see whether Drusus had brought the colts we discussed when he came from his estate yesterday. I’m eager to see them before another buys them. Your brother-in-law is well known for breeding some of the best horses this side of Byzantium.”

  Cornelia tipped her head, but she masked her skepticism. That was not his purpose in coming. “I’ve raised some horses myself, and I would agree that Titus’s animals are quite exceptional.”

  Lepidus’s brows lifted. “You’ve raised horses?”

  Cornelia released a musical laugh. “Of course. I’ve run an estate for many years. Lucius has no interest in overseeing the day-to-day affairs.”

  Lepidus cleared his throat. “I also thought it might be an excellent time for the visit we discussed the other day. I saw my neighbor on a ladder repairing a wall damaged by the recent rains, so I had reason to hope you might be home.” A corner of his lip lifted. “It’s dirty work, but perhaps he can’t afford a slave who knows how to do it.”

  Cornelia kept the flash from her eyes. “Or perhaps he’s just a man who finds satisfaction working with his hands. Pleasure, not lack of money, is equally likely as the reason. There are many things I sometimes enjoy doing myself that my slaves normally do. There is satisfaction in any job well done.”

  She smiled at the tic her words brought to the corner of his mouth. Such condescension toward the man she intended to marry was not acceptable.

  “That’s true. I feel that way about working with my horses, especially the most spirited ones. Occasionally rubbing them down after a hot ride strengthens their bond with me.”

  He cleared his throat again. “Speaking of bonds, Titus mentioned you were no longer married.”


  She raised one eyebrow. “I find it rather odd that came up during your conversation about his horses.”

  There was that tic again. “I must admit I asked him directly when I saw you. Titus merely answered my question.”

  She tipped her head sideways, but masked her irritation perfectly. “I have freed Lucius to pursue whatever pretty young things tempt him.” She punctuated her point with a well-practiced unconcerned laugh.

  Cornelia was careful to keep her full gracious mask in place. Lepidus didn’t seem very skilled in the ways of patrician repartee. Perhaps living in the provinces helped any Roman become less pretentious, less of a play-actor. That was a point in favor of any man.

  A slight smile curved her lips. Hector was perfection itself when it came to being a man who never pretended to be anything he wasn’t.

  Lepidus perked up as he watched her smile. That made her smile bigger. He had no idea she was thinking of the neighbor he looked down on, the man who outshone him in every way.

  “I think any man a fool who wants a pretty child when he can have a woman.” Once more he cleared his throat. “I, myself, am unmarried now. My wife died three years ago. Fabia was an excellent wife and mother. For all of our married life, she was among my favorite companions for conversation. She knew so much about affairs beyond the confines of our villa. Like you, she found pleasure in activity. She spent many hours tutoring our children in what she knew.

  His eyes had turned wistful during that reflection.

  He glanced down, then refocused on her. “Our son just left to serve with a legion in Dacia. Our daughter is married and just gave birth to her first child. Like Fabia, I took special pleasure in teaching them instead of leaving it all to the tutors. Your daughter is an age I enjoyed very much with my own Aemilia.”