Sharon Karaa - A Familiar Problem (Northern Witches #2)

by Unknown

  “Why not let me take you to heaven?” He grinned at me again, cocking his eyebrow. “At least then you can make an informed decision.”

  I’m pretty sure he was being suggestive again and I looked at him, suspiciously. His face was dead pan but his eyes gave him away.

  I huffed and stood up, pacing the length of the kitchen. “So basically it boils down to a choice between probable insanity on earth, tied to a demon who is determined to drive me mad, or redeem my soul and stick around with you lot, possibly winding up in heaven?”

  “Whatever you choose there are risks, Natalia. Whatever you decide, we are with you,” Lauren said.

  She stood up and wrapped her arms around me. She felt warm and familiar. Like a sister I’d never had. Damn it! I needed to go do some evil to balance things out. Then I realised I didn’t need to do evil. Satan wasn’t going to let me back in to Hell any way. It really was heaven or earth.

  “How did banishing a demon end up being a life altering decision? This stinks.” I vanished.

  I found myself back in my bedroom at Lauren’s place. I hadn’t purposefully made the decision to come here but where else was I going to go?

  I changed into my negligee then flipped backwards on to the bed and lay there, considering my options. Was it really a decision between good and evil? And if I chose good, would that mean I was no longer Zerachiel’s enemy?

  “You cannot be serious!”

  Abaddon was back. Oh, be still my beating heart.

  “What? No hello?”

  “Are you telling me you want that demon wannabe?”

  “I take it you’re referring to Zerachiel.”

  “You’re damn right I am!”

  “Awe, are you getting jealous, lover?” I taunted him with the pet-name Lilith had used on him.

  “Of him? Wash your mouth out.”

  “I thought he was rather attractive,” I smiled to myself. Bating him was fun; a chance to get him back for lying to me. And for at least one of the bottles of goddam beer.

  “You don’t belong it heaven, Nats, you would hate it.”

  “Oh? You’ve been then?” I sniggered.

  “Look Nats, I know this is hard to believe but there is absolutely nothing going on between me and Lilith. I haven’t lied to you. She threw Kobal over the abyss because he was the one spreading the rumours about us. She wanted revenge. Lilith wants this mess sorted out as much as I do. Satan isn’t making her life easy at the moment either.”

  “So why did Kobal do it then? And why set you up in the first place?”

  He sighed heavily. “I’m working on it. I’ll let you know as soon as I find anything out. But in the meantime, don’t do anything stupid. There’s a fair chance I can clear my name, if you just give me time.”

  “Oh? And then what? You leave me alone?”

  There was silence for a moment and I wondered if he’d gone.

  “I gave you my word, didn’t I?”

  “Look Abaddon, that’s all well and good for you but Satan isn’t going to let me come home. And what happens if you can’t clear your name? I need more assurance than that. I need to figure out what I want and where I belong.”

  “Fine, ok, you do that, but you cannot seriously be contemplating doing the dirty with that bastard. He’s had more women that hot dinners.”

  “Come off it, he’s an angel, he wouldn’t get away with that!”

  “He’s also God’s tempter. He tempts people who he believes can be redeemed. He uses his allure to entrap them.”

  “Allure?” I asked, wanting to laugh.

  “Yes, damn it! Allure! It’s like magic! It causes the females to want to rip of their knickers and ride him to heaven!”

  “Oh, that allure!” I grinned. What was this guy on? Then I stopped short. Could it be that he was using allure on me? Maybe it wasn’t just a skill reserved for angels!

  “Seriously! If they don’t buy it, they get a chance at heaven. If they do, he gets his wicked way with them. I kid you not, ask him!”

  Strangely enough, that wasn’t so hard to believe. Maybe he was presenting me with an opportunity and if I took him… it, I mean it …then I wouldn’t pass Go or get my two hundred smackers. I shook my head, was I really buying this crock of shit?

  “This isn’t about Zerachiel, Abs” I snapped. “This is about you. And ultimately what happens to me in the process of removing you from my head.”

  “You have trust issues!”

  “You’re a demon, I’m a demon! Of course I have trust issues!”

  I linked my fingers behind my head. Silence. For all of thirty seconds.

  “I’d be willing to promise not to use the bond; stay away. You don’t need to be redeemed to get rid of me, if that’s what you want?”

  “Yeah, right! But you’d still have access to my head. Not sure I could live with that.” I sighed. “Will you let me think about it?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “That means no talking, no keeping me awake, no invading my dreams,” I clarified the terms.

  “Silent as a church mouse, you have my word as a Demon.” I closed my eyes.

  “Natalia?”

  I opened one eye. I don’t know why but it made me feel better.

  “This is you being quiet?”

  “Just one favour, then I promise, zip.”

  “What is it?”

  “Sleep naked?”

  “Pervert!”

  I heard his throaty chuckle and I smiled.

  After thirty seconds of silence, I finally felt comfortable that he was going to live up to his word. I snuggled down in to the pillows and sighed.

  “Abaddon?”

  “I thought you wanted me to be quiet?”

  “I do, but can I ask you one question?”

  “Sure, go ahead.”

  “You’re free now, why do you care if I redeem my soul?”

  He didn’t answer.

  5 - A Little Taste of Heaven

  I woke up the next morning to the sounds of banging coming from the kitchen. I jumped out of bed and ran down the stairs, ready for action, just in case. There was no saying that Lilith wouldn’t still come after me, she was a vindictive bitch.

  Bursting through the door, I stopped and looked at the scene before me. Zerachiel was cooking breakfast, wearing nothing but his loin cloth. Something in me growled and I didn’t know if it was the sight of a semi-naked man or the smell of the bacon that caused it. Or then again it could have been Abaddon. He really didn’t like Zerachiel.

  “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I snapped.

  “I’m making your breakfast. We have a busy day ahead of us and you need sustenance.” He popped a strip of crispy bacon in his mouth and chewed, his blue eyes dancing with merriment.

  “Loving the night wear, Natalia.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me as he chewed, his luscious lips forming a smile and his eyes promising heaven. I remembered what Abaddon had told me and narrowed my eyes.

  “Knock it off, Saccharine, it isn’t going to happen!” I looked down at the negligee and changed it instantly into a high neck cotton nightgown that would get the seal of approval from a nun. I walked past him to the kettle and started making coffee, determined to ignore him. I wasn’t worried about failing the temptation test. I’d just had enough of man-sluts manipulating me.

  We worked in silence, me making drinks and him making us a heart attack breakfast of bacon and egg sandwiches. Finally, we sat down together at Lauren’s small kitchen table, ready to eat. I waited for him to take a big bite of his sandwich.

  So, what’s the plan? You take me to heaven, I fall in love with the place and instantly transform into mother Theresa?” I looked at him innocently, his cheeks bulging as he worked furiously to chew his food and swallow.

  “It doesn’t work like that but yeah, mostly. I show you around but you have to work for redemption. And it takes more than one visit to fully appreciate all that heaven has to offer.”

  “Oh? How many
times does it take?” I asked.

  “I’m not sure. With you, maybe a hundred,” he replied, grinning.

  I frowned at him and took a delicate nibble at my sandwich, waiting for him to take another bite of his own. As soon as his jaws clamped around it, I launched into another question.

  “So, if I do get redeemed, does that mean I don’t get to fuck you?”

  He looked at me, his eyes bulging, and started chewing furiously again. I took a sip of my coffee and waited.

  “Do you want to fuck me?” he asked finally.

  I looked at him coyly over the top of my cup.

  “Not particularly, no.” That was a little bit of a lie; he was extraordinarily sexy for an angel.

  He put his sandwich down and looked at me, confused. “Don’t you find me attractive?” he asked.

  I took another nibble of my sandwich and chewed, really slowly, as if I was thinking about what to say. His blue eyes sparkled at me and I knew he was throwing out his allure.

  “You’re extremely attractive, for an angel. I just like to get to know someone before I get intimately acquainted with them.” I took another nibble. I have absolutely no idea where that horse shit came from but he seemed to be buying it.

  He picked up his food, satisfied with my answer, and took another big bite of his sandwich. I went for the jugular.

  “It’s just that good boys aren’t really known for being good in the bedroom, if you catch my drift.”

  He choked and a piece of sandwich flew out of his mouth, landing on the table in front of me. I picked up a napkin and wiped it up.

  “Oh, dear, are you ok?” I asked innocently.

  “I am fine…” he said through gritted teeth. “… and for your information, there is nothing wrong with my skills in the bedroom. Any time you want to check it out, just let me know.” He glared at me.

  I looked at him in fake horror.

  “Zerachiel, you’re an angel! Aren’t you meant to be chaste?”

  “No more than you’re meant to be a slut. We still have free will,” he replied, still glaring at me.

  He had me there; I hadn’t had it in so long I think my hymen had grown back and, out of sheer boredom, taught itself to knit.

  I sighed and took another bite of my food, watching him beneath my lashes. He picked up his sandwich and was about to take a bite when he looked at me suspiciously and took a smaller mouthful. It looked like the gig was up. Still, I had an arsenal of tricks tucked away and five hundred years’ worth of experience at winding up pretty boys. This wasn’t over by a long shot.

  When we finished eating, Zerachiel turned on the charm offensive, telling me to go make myself beautiful and he would clean the kitchen. He flexed his muscles a couple of times for good measure, letting me see how fit and wonderful he was. I wanted to put my fingers down my throat but I smiled sweetly at him and left him to it.

  Running up to the bedroom, I had to decide what I was going to wear. Slutty wouldn’t do it; not to go to heaven, and besides, that would make his job all the easier. I played around with a couple of outfits until I was satisfied then went to the mirror to sort out my face and hair. As I worked, I could hear Zerachiel humming a tune in the kitchen. He sounded pleased with himself. Well, let’s see how long that lasts.

  I transported to the kitchen door and opened it wide, a shy smile ready on my lips. Zerachiel had his back to me, drying the last of the dishes. Wow, he was hot. Muscles rippled in his arms and back, his thighs as good as any footballer’s. I could just make out the faint crack of his arse beneath the loin cloth. The breath caught in my throat. Oh, he was good. But I was better. I narrowed my eyes as I saw the reflection of his face, grinning at me in the kitchen window.

  I coughed delicately and he turned, slowly, giving me another few seconds to enjoy his physique. I lowered my gaze to the floor.

  I heard the cup he was busy drying snap in his hands and smiled to myself.

  “You look ….lovely!” he said, falsely, staring at my floor length grey skirt and shirt buttoned up to my neck. I’d pulled my hair into a tight knot at the back of my head and wore not a pinch of makeup.

  “I didn’t want to shock anyone when we get there. I thought I’d better dress appropriately,” I said, lowering my eyes and letting my cheeks blush at his compliment.

  “Well, that’s really …considerate of you” he said, throwing the broken cup into the bin and draping the t-towel over the sink.

  “Shall we go?” he asked, offering me his hand.

  “Ahem!” I looked him up and down, my hands clasped in front of me.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, moving toward me.

  “I don’t think you’re appropriately dressed, do you?” I said, looking at him primly.

  He looked down at himself. “This is what all of the angels wear,” he said, confused. “It’s not inappropriate!”

  “Well, I’m sorry, but I just wouldn’t feel comfortable entering God’s kingdom with a semi-naked man at my side. Could you change, please? For me?” I looked up at him with big eyes.

  “Well….I suppose if it would make you feel better…I could change!” he said. He closed his eyes and a pair of denims and a tight-fitting t-shirt materialised on his body. He was still hot.

  “Now, come on Zerachiel. Would you go to church wearing that?” I pursed my lips, mostly to stop myself from laughing in his face.

  He sighed and tried again, appearing now in black slacks and a white dress shirt, open at the neck and revealing just enough skin to be tantalising.

  “Tie?” I said.

  He grimaced and closed his eyes again. A dark blue tie appeared around his neck.

  “Happy now?” he snapped.

  I smiled at him, benevolently and walked towards him holding out my hand.

  “You look like a little boy on his first day at school. Absolutely charming!” I twinkled my eyes at him, ready to piss myself laughing as he snatched up my fingers and pulled me in to him so that my back was against his chest. His scent was addictive and I assumed this was another aspect of his allure. He was pulling out all the stops.

  The clothes did not hide anything while I was pressed up against him so tightly. He placed his hands on my hips and I heard a rustling. I looked back at him and noticed he had extended his wings. They must have been about eight feet tall and strangely, made him even more attractive.

  “Don’t wiggle, unless you’re prepared to face the consequences,” he smiled down at me wickedly and I turned around before he could see me roll my eyes.

  We transported and materialised in the skies above what I assumed was heaven. For a fraction of a second, I thought I would plummet but Zerachiel tightened his grip, wrapping me solidly in his arms as his wings took us down gently towards the ground.

  He was absolutely making the most of having his hands on me and it took everything I had not to give in to the lust that was coursing through my body. He had the allure turned up full volume. I pursed my lips and counted dead sheep to keep myself focussed on something other than the solid length of him pressed against my back.

  At long last we touched down and as fast as I could I tore myself from his arms. I had to take emergency measures so I turned abruptly and puked my insides out. Let’s see if he finds that attractive.

  With spit still on my chin, I turned to face him.

  “Sorry about that, I don’t do heights too well,” I said, feigning dizziness.

  “You’ve got something…” he looked at my chin, disgust written all over his face.

  “What?” I asked, innocently.

  “On your chin…” he raised his hand then dropped it, still staring intently at the glob of spit.

  I took a lace handkerchief out from my sleeve and wiped my face, allowing myself to blush.

  “Oh dear, sorry about that,” I said, shoving the handkerchief back up my sleeve. I would have to thank Agnes for that one later.

  “So!” I said, clasping my hands together. “Where to first?”

>   He looked at me, considering. “Well, people usually come to heaven and the first thing they want to do is meet up with all their dead relatives. I don’t suppose any of yours will be here,” he said.

  I held in the giggle and looked at him sadly. “No, I don’t suppose there will be. My parents were both demons and I never really met any of my other relatives. I didn’t have any siblings either, I was an only child.”

  I allowed my chin to wobble and a tear to well up in my eye. He looked at me sadly then shook himself.

  “How about I take you to the pools of serenity, you’ll like that,” he said, determined. He took me by the hand and pulled me back into his chest, fastening his arm around me and taking off in to the air.

  We flew over fields and meadows. Ahead of us, I could see mountains, their peaks going up into the clouds. A forest of trees came in to view on the horizon and he seemed to be heading straight for it. As we neared the trees, he veered sharply to the right and then down through the valley of the mountains and out to another clearing. Ahead, I could see what looked like a typical summer’s day on earth; a lake filled with people enjoying the disgusting weather.

  He descended slowly again, pulling me in tightly to his body and treating me to another wiff of l’eau de sex god.

  As our feet touched the grass, I again pulled myself out of his arms, almost falling over in my haste. It was getting harder and harder not to give in to my feelings and I wondered what the punishment would be for fucking an angel in full view of everyone. I giggled at the thought. It was tempting.

  “It is beautiful, isn’t it” said Zerachiel, mistaking my good humour for a love of our surroundings.

  “Yes, lovely!” I said. He took me by the hand and dragged me through the sun worshipers to the edge of the lake. A lake full of people splashing each other and having fun. A lake full of naked people.

  I had under-estimated him. I would not make that mistake again.

  “Come on, strip off and we’ll go in,” he said, grinning suggestively at me as he loosened his tie.

  “I can’t,” I said, folding my hands in front of me and staring at him, my brain working overtime to come up with a plausible excuse.