No Turning Back

by Casey Peeler

  “No, I’m not. Now, can we please talk about something else besides me and my no-sex life?”

  “Okay, Okay... damn, I didn’t think it was a big deal,” Hayden whispers to Sarah.

  Georgia looks at me almost like she knows something. I just smile and nod. No words are spoken, but it’s like she knows.

  We get back to campus, get ready, and Georgia stops in my room.

  “Hey Char, you got a minute?”

  “Sure, what’s up?”

  “I know I’m being nosy, but I just had to ask. You can tell me to butt out if you want. Did that conversation today have anything to do with Dylan Sloan?”

  I’m not sure if I want to answer, but I know that Georgia won’t say a word.

  “Yeah, but please don’t mention it. There’s more to this story; I just don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Sure, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay. The look on your face today when Hayden said that broke my heart.”

  “Thank you, Georgia, for noticing. It means a lot.” She gives me a hug and goes to her room.

  I finish getting ready, text Cash, and wait for Joe. At 7:45p.m., there’s a knock at the door, I open it to Joe standing there holding a bouquet of daisies.

  “Thanks, Joe. You didn’t have to do that. You going to come in?”

  “Charley, you look stunning.”

  “Thank you. So, are you going to come in or stand in the hallway all night?”

  “Sorry, I was distracted by the most beautiful creature I have ever seen.” I can feel the heat in my cheeks begin to rise.

  He hands me the flowers, and I find an old Choice Cherry Gold bottle to make a vase. Redneck at its best! He just smiles and laughs.

  “Nice vase.”

  “Well, not like I packed one from home or anything.”

  He takes my hand as I turn to fix the flowers and pulls me close to him. He kisses me and then asks, “Shall we?” I nod and we walk into the hall to find all my hallmates peeking out the door. They are all going to the Homecoming Dance stag. Most of them wanted to keep their options open for the night. I, on the other hand, feel safe for the first time without Cash.

  We make our way to the front lawn, there is a huge party tent, music is being played by the DJ, and there is a buffet dinner. We fix our plates and find a table. The rest of the Kluft girls arrive about twenty minutes later. They have definitely been partaking in a few beverages.

  “Hey, if y’all need something to drink, just go to my room. I got plenty, plus it’s closer than Kluft,” Hayden says.

  Joe answers before I can, “I wish I could, but we’re under 24-hour rule with the game tomorrow. I’ll be ready for a cold one tomorrow night.” Well, at least I know we can be sober together and still have a great time.

  After we eat, the alumni are already on the dance floor. It looks just like a fairytale in here. There are strings of lights, a wooden dance floor, tables with fancy tablecloths, and cute little centerpieces.

  As time ticks by, we all make our way to the dance floor. We start off with the “Bikers Shuffle” then move on to some oldies my parents like. Around 10:00, we notice all the alumni leaving. It must be the cue for the party to really get started. I honestly think this must be the same DJ from Hank’s because I know we will hear these again tomorrow.

  Joe and I haven’t left the dance floor since we got here, the only difference is that I have lost the shoes I came with because my feet are killing me!

  While we are dancing, a familiar song comes on.

  “So, are you gonna put it on me like last time?” Joe whispers in my ear.

  “You better believe it!” They are playing “Get Low,” the same song I left Joe wanting more at Hank’s. I guess this is our song.

  I have to remind myself that I am not in the most appropriate attire to dance how I did that night, but what the hell, you only live once.

  Joe and I bump and grind all over each other right there for everyone to see. I make sure that I don’t show my ass literally to people around me, but I’m definitely enjoying myself. I turn around to look at him and place my hand on his face as I continue to match my hips in rhythm with his. He smiles as I look into those eyes, and my lips crash into his.

  The dance shuts down at midnight, and Joe has to be in his room for curfew at 12:30. He walks me to my room, and on the way there, he stops me. I turn to look at him, and he smiles.

  “Charley, I just want to thank you for a perfect night. This has been the best date of my life. I wish I could stay with you tonight, but I’m sure Coach is already mad that I was late this morning. Promise me you will be there to cheer me on?”

  “Of course, I will!” He takes my hand and walks me to my dorm room. I unlock the door, and he kisses me goodnight.

  “Sleep tight, Jackalope Joe; I’ll be pulling for ya tomorrow.” I wink.

  He kisses me again and walks to his dorm.

  I go into my room and relive the fairytale of my night. I take off my dress, get into my pajamas, and doze off. I wake up to my phone beeping.

  Joe: Good morning beautiful! I can’t wait to see you in the stands today!

  Me: :) Good morning to you too. C u soon!

  The game is at noon. The girls and I get ready and eat breakfast before going over to the field. The first person we see is Coach.

  “I see you are all still alive.”

  “Yes, ma’am. Looks like you had fun on the dance floor last night, too,” I say.

  “I did, and I have to say that was quite a show you two put on out there. I sure do hope he made curfew.” My face starts to blush, again.

  “He did. Just so you know.” I smile.

  We find a seat on the bleachers that will accommodate all of us. I can see Joe warming up, and I smile when he looks my way. He is so dagum cute in that uniform!

  The game is great, and we win, of course. Isn’t that how all Homecoming games are played... play someone you know you can beat? The Homecoming King and Queen are crowned. Not to my surprise, Lucas is our new Homecoming King.

  Crystal pretty much attacks him afterwards, and we all stand around talking after the game. As I'm standing there talking to Tori and Georgia, I feel a familiar hand wrap around my waist. Sure enough, it’s Joe.

  “Great game.”

  “Thanks.” He gives me a quick kiss in front of God and everybody. “Wanna go out for dinner before Hank’s? I mean like all the Kluft girls and us Irvin guys?” I look at Tori and Georgia.

  “Hell yeah, we’ll go, but you guys better be buying!” Tori says with her hands on her hips.

  “I’ll see what I can do.”

  We return to Kluft, chill out on the lawn, and get ready for supper with the Irvin boys. We invite Hayden and Sarah. We take the Love Machine, a guy from Irvin’s 4Runner, and Joe’s Jeep.

  We eat supper, and yes, the guys pick up the tab before going back to pregame before Hank’s. At supper, I notice that Joe is really quiet, and when I ask him about it, he brushes it off.

  When we get back to campus, everyone starts to go their separate ways. As I’m about to get out of the Jeep, Joe grabs my hand.

  “I need you to wait.” I shake my head yeah. Have I done something wrong? Is he breaking up with our non-relationship? I’m so confused.

  “Is everything okay?” He shakes his head no.

  “Let’s go for a ride.” I nod.

  “Hey Georgia, we’ll be back in a few.” She waves bye to me, and we leave campus. Joe doesn’t say a word. He stops at the public fishing access for the Rock Lake. He just sits there and then pulls out his phone.

  “Squirrel, I don’t know how to start this conversation. I got this via Facebook after the game today. I take a look at his phone and burst into tears.

  On his phone is a picture of Joe and me asleep in my bedroom with minimal clothes on and below it is a picture of me in my bedroom with Dylan on top of me. The caption reads, “I had her first.”

  “Charley, please talk to me. I don’t know who
this is or what it’s about.” I shake my head no. I don’t want to relive it; I don’t want to talk, but I have no choice.

  Joe pulls me into his shoulder, and I cry. When I feel like I can manage to get the words out, I say, “I’m ready.”

  “Have you ever heard of Dylan Sloan?”

  Joe nods his head yes. “He’s a really good swimmer, right?”

  “Yeah, he’s also my ex. We started dating over a year and a half ago. One night when my parents we’re out of town, we went to a party. I wouldn’t sleep with him.... um....” I pause.

  “It’s okay Charley, you can trust me.”

  “I know I can.” I have to get this out fast. “He drugged and raped me.”

  Joe doesn’t say a word. He just looks at the floor board. “I don’t know what to say, Charley. I mean, I knew you were timid about sex and stuff, but now I know why. Did he get in trouble for it?”

  I shake my head no. I can see the anger building in Joe then he pounds the steering wheel.

  “Damnit, Charley, he needs to pay for what he did to you!”

  “There’s more.” He looks at me like he can’t believe it. “I told you my parents were gone. We have this stupid goat, Joker, who had been jumping the fence to Cash’s farm. I was supposed to check on him, and after that happened, I couldn’t. I texted Cash for him to check on Joker, and he knew something was up. Cash found me.”

  Joe sat there for what felt like an eternity.

  “Char, I’m so sorry. I don’t even know what to say.”

  “There’s nothing to say. Cash is the only one that knows everything about that night. That is why we are so close. But there’s more, on my birthday I got an envelope from him. I didn’t open it until I went home. It had picture of all of my friends off at college and.... me and you at Hank’s that first night.”

  “That son of a bitch! I’m going to kill him!”

  “Uh, no, you’re not. Those pictures aren’t on campus. This is his way of trying to get a rise outta you.”

  “Charley, I think it’s time I talked to Cash.” Oh shit. Here is my life about to be put out there on a silver platter.

  I shake my head yeah and dial his number.

  “Hey Char-coal, what’s up?”

  “Um, Joe wants to talk to you.”

  “Char, what’s going on? He did something didn’t he?!”

  “Yeah, Joe got a Facebook message, and it’s worse than the last time.” I don’t want to go into detail, but I have to explain it to Cash.

  “Char, I’ve kept my mouth shut. We’ve hid secrets too long. I’m going to kill him if I see him. I’m just warning you right now!”

  “Cash, please! I’m begging you!” Joe grabs my phone from me.

  “Hey Cash, this is Joe.”

  “Is she okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  Cash and Joe talk things out, and I sit there in the dark. Finally, Joe puts it on speaker.

  “Listen Char, here’s the deal. I’m not there, but Joe is. He’s got your back while I’m here. He is going to make sure that you stay safe. Honestly, I’m glad he knows. I can actually sleep at night.”

  “Cash, I’m so sorry. I never wanted all of this.” I just weep.

  “Char, it’s not your fault. He’s a total ass, and one day he is going to pay for all of this.”

  “I love you.” Oh gosh, I forgot Joe was with me.

  “I love you, too. Now be safe and go to Hank’s. Joe’s got your back. Call me tomorrow.”

  I hang up and look at Joe.

  “I’m sorry about that.”

  “What? The I love you?” I nod yes. “Squirrel, it’s okay. I know you love him, and I understand it now.”

  “You ready to head back now?” I ask him.

  We drive back to Southern, get ready for Hank’s and start to pregame in Caroline’s room. I notice that Joe doesn’t take a beer.

  “You can drink one. I’ll be okay.”

  “Are you sure? And just so you know, you’re never getting out of my sight!”

  At our usual 11:30, we roll out to Hank’s, now in the Love Machine. Joe keeps his promise and doesn’t let me outta his sight. He even walks me to the bathroom. We dance all night, but tonight we dance even closer. The fact that there are fewer secrets between us only makes us closer. When “Let’s Get it On” plays, there’s no denying that he’s staying with me tonight, and everyone in Hank’s knows it, too.

  Chapter 10: The Project

  I wake up to snoring in my ear and arms wrapped around my body. Joe. I can’t help but smile. He didn’t leave me last night. Hank’s was awesome, even with the events of yesterday, I am still enjoying life. I will not let Dylan Sloan ruin my life.

  I try to move out of Joe’s arms, but he only holds me tighter. My phone begins to ring, and I know by the ringtone it’s Cash.

  “Hey Cash,” I say with a yawn.

  “Mornin’ Char. How did it go last night?”

  “We had a great time. Just a normal Saturday night at Hank’s. You have got to go with me one night. I’m tellin’ ya, it really is where redneck meets ghetto fabulous.”

  Cash is laughing on the other end, “Char, you sure do have a way with words. So, how is Joe?”

  “Um... he’s okay, I think.”

  There is silence on the phone.

  “Is he there with you?”

  “Yeah, but Cash he just wants to keep me safe.”

  “I understand that Char, but I don’t like it. My arms are the only ones that you belong in. I mean, I don’t mean to be an ass, but I can’t help but get a little jealous that someone else gets to hold you.”

  I look at Joe who is still asleep, and decide I might need to sneak out to talk to Cash.

  “Hey hold on, Cash Money, I’m going to walk out in the hall.”

  “Um, no! You keep your ass in that room. Don’t go anywhere without someone. I mean it, Char. I will never forgive myself if something happens to you.”

  “Okay, okay. Well, can I call you back later?”

  “Yeah, I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  I hit end on the phone and get a Choice Cherry Gold out of the fridge. I open it and take a swig. When I’m about three gulps in, I get the begeezes scared out of me by the sound of Joe’s voice.

  “So, that was weird, huh?” He says as he’s lying shirtless on the bed with his arm propping up his head and smiling.

  After I collect myself and quit coughing, I nod my head yes because talking is still questionable at this point.

  “I hope I didn’t make that uncomfortable for you two?”

  “No, I just didn’t want to wake you.”

  He looks at me with a smirk, “You sure?”

  “Yeah, but I do need to talk to him alone. What you got planned today?”

  “Not much. This is totally a different subject, but I was thinking about the volunteering we have to do. Coach was talking about a community event next Saturday. I thought it would be cool to use it. In fact, if we went to the special purpose school on Wednesday and Friday, we could invite them and we’d be finished with the project.”

  “Yeah, I love that idea. I wish that we had this class next semester when Special Olympics takes place. I just loved volunteering for that back home.”

  “Charley, you really have the heart for those kids. Maybe that’s what you should do with your life.”

  “I just don’t want to be a teacher. I like the volunteering and working one on one. I can still do all that when I run the farm, ya know?”

  “True.”

  Joe throws the comforter off him and grabs his shirt from last night. Oh that boy has a body and those abs are like an old washboard. I could so rub my hands up and down them.

  “Hey Joe, so how are we going to do this whole thing? I mean the whole you’re with me all the time? You know that’s not possible with practice and different classes.”

  “Char, is there anyone on this hall that has a clue about Dylan?”

  I take a
minute to think. No one knows about Dylan. Oh wait, Georgia knows of Dylan, but not the situation.

  “Georgia was with me when I got the envelope, but I didn’t open it. She knows who Dylan is because she’s a swimmer of course.”

  “I know you’re not going to like this, but I think she needs to know some of what is going on. That way a girl knows.”