Impulse (New Adult Romance)

by C. J. Lake

What an addictive disaster this dance was turning out to be.

  And now her fragile grip on self-control was slipping. If she didn't push away or say something soon, she would relinquish that last scrap of willpower she had tonight.

  “Um, seriously, though,” she said, managing to find her voice, though it sounded embarrassingly shaky. Clearing her throat, she tried again, this time to sound more casual and composed. “I'm surprised you didn't bring a girl with you tonight. I kind of thought you would.” Why bring up that topic? Simple—it was the last thing they'd been talking about before she got in her trance-of-desire, so it was the first thing that occurred to her to blurt out.

  Mick pulled back enough to look at her. When their eyes met hers, he grinned. “It seems you think a lot about my sex life—you know, for someone who wants no part of it.” Before she could muster a face-saving reply to that, Mick smirked, teasing her, “Or is that just sisterly concern?”

  “Don't even go there,” Cady warned, almost glowering at him. Seriously, if Mick was going to jump on the “we're one big happy family” train that their parents were driving these days, she was going to snap. “You'll never be a 'brother' to me—I'll never think of you that way.”

  With a maddening effect, Mick dipped his head lower, bringing his mouth closer. “So how will you think of me?” Feeling his warm, arousing breath on her ear nearly made her tremble. “Just as some guy you want to sleep with but can’t?”

  “What?” she yelped, now pushing back against his chest. Then she glanced protectively over her shoulder in case anyone was within earshot. “I can't believe you just said that!” she whispered hotly. Seriously, the nerve of him being so smug—so sure that she wanted him, despite her attempts to keep things cooled off between them.

  “Fine, forget I said that,” Mick offered, shrugging it off. “It's not like you'd admit it anyway.”

  Now Cady huffed a sigh, and she averted her gaze since it seemed she had trouble with articulation when she was looking straight into Mick's dark eyes. Her voice was just above a whisper, hoping the two of them weren't being overheard. “I'll admit that you're a very attractive guy.” With a hard swallow, she added, “I'm sure you know plenty of girls who will sleep with you.”

  At that, Mick gave a short, dismissive laugh. “I think you give me too much credit.” When she braved an uncertain glance at him, she found his brooding gaze waiting for her—and their eyes locked. “If I'm such a player,” he continued, keeping his voice low, “then how come I go to bed with a hard-on every night thinking of you?”

  She gasped, speechless for a second—as her heartbeat sped up again, racing like crazy in her chest.

  “I can't believe you just said that, either...” she mumbled quietly, shaking her head.

  His voice was brusque, unwavering. “Why not? It's true.”

  “You're...you're just so direct sometimes,” she confessed, a little rattled by it, “it throws me off.”

  Impatiently, Mick replied, “That's because you want to talk around everything, Cady, and play all these games.”

  “I'm not playing games!” she argued. “Mick, I—I'm just trying to...” Protect myself. “...be smart about this. Our parents are married now. And it might actually last! We...we don't want to do something that we can't undo.”

  “Speak for yourself,” he replied just as the music began to change, becoming too fast-paced for them to continue dancing as they were. Cady's arms dropped back to her sides and Mick stepped back. With a frustrated sigh, he said, “Look, I see that you want to do the friend thing, but...sorry, I'm just not feeling it.” Cady wanted to protest, but didn't know how. “Obviously we're not on the same page,” Mick went on, running a hand along his jaw before he delivered the final blow, “For now, I think we should stay away from each other.”

  The moment he walked away from her, Cady's heart sank—and, coincidentally, this was also the moment that the overjoyed newlyweds came dancing past. “Hi, Cady!” Linda gushed. “Are you having fun tonight?”

  “Yep. Amazing time,” Cady gritted out.

  “That's wonderful,” Brandall agreed merrily.

  “I saw you dancing with Mick,” Linda said, her eyes bright. “I'm so happy you two are getting to know each other! Like I said to your father, I honestly feel I'm gaining a daughter in all this.” Her eyes twinkled at the disturbing sentiment, which Brandall felt the need to echo.

  “And I'm gaining a son!” he said, quite predictably. Then the two of them giggled and spun away, dancing off to their invisible bubble in la-la land.

  Well, at least she and Mick had their oblivious parents completely fooled, Cady thought as she turned around to look for him again. God, could she be more obsessed? Apparently not, as one dance had her consumed with Mick again. One moment he was reducing her to a puddle of lust without even trying, and the next he was walking away...

  After several moments of glancing around the banquet room, then waiting to see if he might return from the bathroom or something, Cady stopped searching, realizing it was futile. He hadn't just walked off the dance floor—he had left the wedding altogether.

  An uneasy, gloomy feeling sank into the pit of her stomach.

  He was gone.

  Chapter Thirty-one

  The idea of crashing at the hotel for the night sounded fine when his mom had first suggested it—maybe he'd been imagining that he'd either be intoxicated or exhausted after the wedding—but now that Mick was back in his room, wide-awake and basically sober, he didn't see any point to staying.

  Since Terrence was using the Audi tonight, Mick had taken the T and then a bus to the hotel. Now he pulled his phone out of his pocket and checked the time. Eleven o'clock. Transportation would still be running for a couple more hours.

  He looked around the darkened room, which was dimly lit by moonlight and just one of the wall sconces that Mick had flicked on when he'd returned from the reception. The room might as well have been vacant; the overnight bag he'd hastily packed that day was still zipped and sitting on the floor where he'd left it after he'd checked in.

  He would be bored out of his mind here tonight, he realized. Hell, if he was going to be doing nothing, he'd rather do nothing in his apartment in Boston.

  Maybe he'd have time to catch up with his friends. Since it was Saturday night, he was pretty sure they were out somewhere, working their usual angles to meet girls—except for Walker, of course, who spent most weekends wrapped up with Jen. Probably at this very moment Jen was putting on that baby-talk voice, clinging to Walker like a life raft, and forcing him to watch a chick flick.

  Out of nowhere, Mick felt a sudden stab of envy for Walker.

  Wait—that couldn't be right. He definitely was not envious of Walker's relationship.

  Was he?

  Nah, Mick thought, brushing off the concept. Obviously Mick wasn't interested in Jen, whom he and his friends secretly found irritating. But, he supposed, for a second there, he'd been recalling what it felt like to have a girl be all yours. To spend time with someone you were really into and know that she felt the same, that she wanted you, in and out of bed...

  Forget it, he reminded himself. The last thing Mick needed right now was a serious relationship. Yes, having a girlfriend had its benefits, but it also tied you down and invited drama into your life.

  And it would definitely wreck with your emotions if you fell hard for a girl and then had to move half-way around the world for eight months. He was going to Italy in July. Obviously he wanted no ties before he went—nothing that would put a damper on his year abroad.

  Suddenly he felt determined to go out, to salvage what was left of this night. It would sure be a lot more appealing than sitting in this hotel room watching TV. With any luck, he'd meet a girl—someone uncomplicated—a chick who didn't make him batshit crazy, he thought cynically, trying to force Cady from his mind.

  To hell with this, he decided, springing up off the edge of the bed, eager to return to Boston. He crossed the room and unzi
pped his overnight bag. He had already shucked off his suit jacket and loosened his tie when he'd entered his room. Now, he pulled the tie over his head and balled it up—just as there was knock on his door.

  Caught off-guard, he paused.

  When Mick walked over to the door and glanced through the peephole, his adrenaline spiked and the tie he forgot he was holding dropped onto the floor. His instinctive response was like a chain reaction—first exhilaration, then caution.

  His heart thudded hard in his chest as he pulled open the door.

  Almost shyly, Cady was standing on the other side of it, gently biting her lip. For chrissake, did she have to look so vulnerable and sweet right now, so fucking beautiful? He refused to show her, yet again, how much she affected him. Instead, Mick simply raised his brows, as he might do with a stranger. “Yes?”

  “Hi...” Cady began, then spared a furtive glance over her shoulder, checking the hallway, which was deserted at the moment. “Um...can I come in?” she said once she was facing him again.

  Well, fuck. Was he going to say no? He wouldn't do that to her even if he wanted to—which, of course, he didn't.

  Still, even as Mick acquiesced, he felt tension coiling in his gut. As usual, Cady had him feeling conflicted. He'd already put too much thought and longing into his whole Cady Killoren infatuation, which was getting him exactly nowhere. When he'd left her on the dance floor tonight, he'd made a decisive mental break with the whole thing.

  And yet here he stood, worshiping her with his eyes, though trying not to show it.

  Wordlessly, Mick stepped back, opening the door wider. As Cady walked past him into the hotel room, Mick watched her, trailing his eyes down her body. As he had earlier, Mick felt an instinctive, primal response—to the luscious way her dress hugged her ass and the sweet, feminine scent that enticed him as she passed. Those high heels were turning him on, too. She honestly seemed oblivious to how sexy she was. Meanwhile, he was already getting a hard-on just looking at her.

  Now, as she turned to face him, Mick let the heavy hotel door slam shut.

  He put on his poker-face.

  They were alone together in his hotel room. The setting had the potential to be incredible, but considering Cady's stubborn vow not to get involved with him, Mick doubted they were about to start tearing their clothes off. He just hoped she wasn't here to reiterate how much she didn't want him.

  At first, she took a breath, appearing tentative—which only aggravated him and made him impatient. Why the hell had she come to his door? Just to torture him?

  Finally Mick spoke. “I thought we said we'd stay away from each other.”

  At that, Cady surprised him by half-grinning. She appeared almost playful as she flashed her bright blue eyes at him. “Actually...I never agreed to that,” she pointed out.

  “That's true,” Mick acknowledged after a beat, recalling that when he'd parted ways with her on the dance floor she hadn't actually responded to his suggestion. He studied her for a moment, wondering where this was going.

  She took another breath and began: “I've been thinking...”

  “Hey, that's unusual,” he muttered dryly since it seemed like all this girl did was think too much.

  She ignored his sarcasm; in fact, he wasn't sure she'd even heard him. She seemed intently focused on whatever she'd come here to say. “Look, Mick, the truth is—oh, I'm not bothering you right now, am I?” she asked suddenly, stopping herself.

  Define 'bother,' he thought with frustrated desire. He already felt the electricity crackling between them, even from three feet away. “No,” was all he said.

  She nodded. “Okay, good. Um, well...”

  When her voice trailed off again, Mick asked point-blank: “What is it, Cady? Why are you here?” If his tone was blunt, even cold, it was only because he was determined not to sound hopeful. Not to show her how hungry and eager he still was for her.

  With a sigh, she continued, “I guess seeing our parents dancing tonight made me realize something.”

  It seemed her eyes kept flitting from his mouth to his collar, before finally finding their way back to his eyes. Inevitably, their gazes locked.

  What followed was a long, intense look between them, which stirred Mick's blood. The hope and hunger were rising at full strength now. Especially when Cady didn't break the eye contact or shy away—but instead, took a step closer to him.

  Then another.

  His muscles tightened and his nerves were all keyed up now.

  “I've been trying to be so smart about this,” she confessed, again letting her gaze drift from his eyes down to his lips. She probably didn't realize she was doing it, but the way she couldn't seem to stop focusing on Mick's mouth was severely turning him on. He found himself zoning in on her mouth, too...her lips, her tongue... As his cock stiffened, he vaguely heard her say, “Take our parents, for instance. Here those two have been acting completely foolish, and yet they're happy.” A little sigh slipped from her lips as she shook her head and admitted, “It made me think, I don't know, maybe I should try something different.” Shutting her eyes, she mumbled, “I don't know if this is coming out right—”

  “I still don't want to be friends,” Mick told her, cutting her off before she could start babbling. He didn't mean to be so brusque with her, but an acute, powerful sense of need drove him. His whole body tensed with arousal. He edged closer, almost crowding her, as he raked his eyes down her body. If he was reading her wrong, she could make her hasty, flustered exit and they could be done with this.

  But she didn't leave. She didn't back away. Instead, she shocked and excited the hell out of him when she replied softly, “Neither do I. Mick...” She set her hands on his chest, gingerly, as though testing it out, before she began running her fingertips lightly over the buttons on his shirt.

  Every male impulse in him wanted to grab her and crush his mouth to hers. But he was trying to keep himself in check—to hold himself back and let her lead.

  Yeah, that wasn't going to work. The way Cady was trailing her fingers along Mick's chest, as though unsure whether to pop open his shirt buttons or to keep caressing them, was driving him insane.

  He gripped her gently by the waist and tugged her even closer. “Cady...” he murmured huskily, sliding his arms around her. Soon he was running his hands up and down her back.

  Clutching the front of his shirt, Cady sighed, “I'm so sick of being cautious.”

  Yes—finally.

  Heat coursed feverishly through Mick's veins, as he pulled her flush up against him. All at once he heard her sharp intake of breath, then felt her arms coil around his neck and her body melt against his. Damn, could this finally be happening...?

  When she snuggled closer, he closed his eyes and stopped questioning it. He nearly groaned with lust as he grabbed her ass, and then felt her lips brush against the curve of his neck. “Kiss me,” she whispered, digging her fingers into his hair. This was like a fantasy come true. His dick was beyond aching now.

  “Kiss, huh?” Mick uttered thickly, walking her back a few steps toward the wall.

  “Yes...” she urged, her lips feathering against his neck, while she tugged lightly on his hair as she rubbed her lower body against his. His erection strained against his zipper, and it found only a measure of tortured relief when he got Cady backed up against the wall. Savagely, he pressed himself against her and she moaned softly in response—then brought her mouth to his ear. “One kiss...just to see if we like it,” she said, playfully echoing the words from the first night they'd met.

  Mick grinned at that, pulling back a fraction to look at her. He slid his palm over her cheek. What was he going to do about this girl? his mind asked suddenly, but Mick shoved aside the question. Then he was kissing her, and just like it had been on their first night, the chemistry between them was instant. As soon as Mick touched his lips to hers— intending a slow, gentle kiss to warm her up—Cady responded eagerly, opening her mouth, sliding her tongue against his, kissing
him with total passion.

  A savage groan rumbled from Mick's throat as Cady kissed him so hungrily, moaning as he licked deep into her mouth. Christ, he forgot how hot and worked up she could get when she stopped over-thinking everything. Like now, when she was tugging his hair, restlessly rocking her hips, swaying that amazing ass that was still in his hands.

  One kiss to see if they liked it? The first time she'd proposed that, it had sounded sort of silly. Tonight it was just ridiculous. “Yeah, this is terrible,” Mick muttered hoarsely, as he kissed her deeper and deeper, “just fucking awful...”

  Cady managed a laugh at that, though her voice sounded weak. “Yes,” she whispered through choppy, panting breaths, “I hate this...”

  He smiled against her mouth for only a second before he was devouring her again.

  Chapter Thirty-two

  How had she ended up here? Cady wondered hazily as Mick's mouth trailed down her neck and his hands worked up the hem of her dress. She slid her eyes closed when she felt his teeth gently scrape against the curve of her neck, sending ripples of excitement through her. Tightening her grip on his hair, she arched her neck, urging him on, and so he intensified what he was doing, kissing her throat so sensuously that her knees almost buckled and she barely found the strength to moan.

  She was so lost and overheated, she didn't even realize he had worked his way back up, until suddenly his mouth was on hers again. Any possible restraint was extinguished instantly by the crushing heat of the kiss. Their mouths mated in a way that was completely carnal.

  Both were impatient, artless, the fevered sexuality between them blatant now as they tore at each other. Their tongues were aggressive, their hands clawing. Cady didn't even realize that a string of soft, helpless moans was escaping her throat, or that her body was eagerly rubbing against Mick's.

  Still kissing him, Cady yanked the front of Mick's shirt from his pants, and then with trembling fingers began popping open the buttons. Finally their mouths broke apart and Mick pulled back a fraction to look at her. Breathing hard, he gazed rapturously into her face.