by Kitty Neale
Rhona cast her eyes down. It sounded so tempting. She could imagine what it would be like on the common, wandering along the paths that criss-crossed the open ground or sitting under the shade of a large tree. But it was no good. She tried to smile. ‘Look, I’m sorry, but I don’t think I’m strong enough yet. Another time, maybe.’
‘How about that small park then? It’s only a couple of streets away,’ Mavis persisted. ‘The fresh air would do you good, but if you feel a bit wobbly we can turn around and come back. You won’t know unless you give it a go.’
Rhona thought for a moment. ‘OK. Why not. I’ll lean on you and you can carry me back if you have to.’ She flashed a smile. ‘Just joking, Mave, it won’t come to that.’
‘I would if you needed me to. I’ve carried James often enough, and even Greg until pretty recently. I’m stronger than I look.’
Rhona gingerly stood up and tested her weak leg muscles. ‘Give me your arm,’ she said with determination. We’ll have a wander and see how we go.’
They set off, Rhona moving like someone four times her age, but she didn’t give up and realised she was enjoying herself as they slowly made their way to the little park, where she collapsed on a bench. It wasn’t a trip out on a bus, but that could wait. For now she could sit back and let the sunshine fall on her face. It was such a pleasure not to be inside the four walls of her small house. She sighed with relief. ‘Thanks, Mavis. I wouldn’t have made the effort without you urging me to give it a go.’
‘I used to come here when Grace was really little. She liked chasing the pigeons.’ Mavis smiled ruefully. ‘When she goes back to school in September, she’ll have a new teacher, one I’ve heard is quite strict, but that’ll be good for her. Grace loves school, which is more than I ever did.’
‘She hasn’t got word blindness like you, then?’
‘No, neither of them has. I don’t know if it’s passed on in families but I’m very glad they’re both all right. It made my life a misery all the way through school.’
‘Yeah, you said. Didn’t Tommy tease you?’
‘He did more than tease me, he was horrible back then. But he was egged on by his friend Larry. He was the worst, but he’s not around to bother me now.’ Mavis thought back to the news of the raids the police had carried out after Tommy had given them his information. There was no way Larry Barnet would dare come back to South London again. She wondered whether to tell Rhona about the attack, and that now and again she still felt nervous, but decided the younger woman had quite enough on her plate at the moment. She’d tell her once her friend was stronger.
‘And how’s Tommy these days?’
Mavis smiled. ‘Same as ever.’
‘Still waiting for you to give in?’
‘You’ve got a one-track mind, Rhona, but yes.’
‘The man’s a saint,’ said Rhona, ‘and anyone can see that he loves you to bits.’
Mavis watched a blackbird hopping along, looking for worms. She sat back against the bench. ‘I’ve got some news. You’ll never guess. We’re all going on holiday in August – Jenny, Stan and Greg, Mum, Pete and Bobby, me and the kids and Tommy. We’re going to Torquay, to a Bed and Breakfast that Stan knows. I’ve never had a proper holiday before and I can’t wait.’ She grinned broadly at the thought of it.
‘Wow, that sounds fab,’ breathed Rhona. ‘I’ve never been to the seaside. You’d better send me a card.’
‘The thing is,’ said Mavis, ‘I’ve found myself starting to wish that Tommy and I could share the same room.’
‘What!’ Rhona nearly fell off the bench. ‘That’s a turn-up for the books! You’ve always said you wouldn’t. What’s changed your mind?’
Mavis turned to face her. ‘I’ve finally realised I can trust Tommy. I mean, it wasn’t him, it was me who had the problem. After Alec I didn’t want anything to do with that side of things ever again. What you said helped – made me think not every man was like Alec. And now I know Tommy cares for me, really cares for me, I think I want to be with him, you know, all the way. I don’t want to spend the entire holiday thinking how gorgeous and loving he is and not be able to do anything about it. Does that sound bad?’
‘No, it sounds good,’ said Rhona at once, sounding more enthusiastic than she had done since falling ill. ‘About time too, I’d say.’
‘My family won’t mind, they all think he’s great.’ She paused. ‘There is one thing …’
Blimey, thought Rhona. She wondered what was coming next and if she was becoming the agony aunt of Peckham. She waited for Mavis to get up the courage to say what she wanted.
‘I can’t risk having a baby,’ Mavis said in a rush, ‘not until I’m married to Tommy. You take the pill. Could I get hold of it?’
‘Of course. You go to the doctor – if you don’t want to go to your usual one then try a different one, but like we said before, in theory you’re still a married woman. It’s not like you’re single and trying to get hold of it like I was. Get yourself down there today so you’re all ready when the time comes.’
‘All right, I will. Now that’s enough about me. What about this new man you were telling me about before you became ill?’
Rhona’s expression grew confused. ‘Gary? You know what, Mavis, I’m not sure what to think. I thought he was really keen on me, like I was on him. I even wondered if he might be the one, you know? He was so different to all the other men, and I reckon I let myself fall for him.’ She stopped for a moment. Now she was feeling better, the sense of disappointment in him was even stronger. ‘But I haven’t heard a peep from him, well, other than my mate Penny passing on a message from him to tell me to get well soon. But otherwise not a dicky bird from Gary, no card, no flowers, nothing. It’s like everything we did together never happened, and I don’t just mean the sex. We used to talk about lots of stuff, like music. He taught me a bit of guitar. I thought that made us special, that we had a real connection.’ She clenched her hands in her lap. ‘Now it’s sweet FA, and I don’t know what to do about it.’
Mavis sat up in surprise. Rhona had never been uncertain about a man before, so this was a first. Her heart went out to her friend. ‘Maybe he’s waiting for you to get better,’ she offered. ‘Perhaps he thinks he’ll be in the way.’
‘Yeah, maybe.’ Rhona blinked once or twice, willing herself not to cry. She never cried over men, that was her golden rule. It must be because she was still weak and tired. ‘Men aren’t good with things like sickness, are they? He’s probably scared he’ll catch it.’
Mavis privately thought that if Gary only cared about himself then Rhona was better off without him, but that wasn’t what her friend wanted to hear. ‘If he’s on the telephone, now that you’re feeling better you could ring him.’
‘There’s one in the hallway of his digs.’ Rhona swallowed hard and pulled herself together. ‘That’s a good idea, Mave, I’ll just give him a casual call and ask him if he fancies going out somewhere when I’m feeling up to it. He won’t mind. I’ve never been one to let the man do all the asking anyway.’ She gave a small grin. ‘Or I might surprise him, wait until there’s a concert on I know he’ll be at and then just turn up, out of the blue.’
‘Do you really think that’s a good idea?’ asked Mavis, unsure. She could well imagine what a man like Gary might be getting up to while his girlfriend was sick.
‘Oh yes.’ Rhona’s eyes shone now with anticipation. ‘The more I think about it, the more I reckon that’s what I’ll do. It’d give him a lovely surprise.’
Mavis walked back from the doctor’s surgery towards her house, trembling with excitement. She’d plucked up the courage and got what she wanted, even though she’d had to tell a white lie. She was changing doctors, she’d said, because they had moved house and although they’d only gone from one side of Peckham to the other, she thought it would be too far to remain with her present doctor if one of the children became ill. She didn’t want any more children at the moment because Grace had only rece
ntly started full-time school. No, her husband didn’t have any objections. Mavis herself was certain it was the best thing for all the family.
The doctor had nodded; checked her blood pressure and agreed to prescribe the Pill. She only had to come back for repeat prescriptions and regular check-ups to ensure it wasn’t affecting her blood pressure. Otherwise she was free to go. Mavis wondered whether to tell Tommy but decided she’d try taking it for a while first, just in case she experienced any side effects. She wanted to be absolutely sure it would work before she broke the news to him. She wouldn’t have long to wait, though, and everything would be ready for the August holiday.
Mavis closed her eyes for a moment, smiling as she imagined the look on Tommy’s face when she told him.
Chapter Fourteen
‘Mr Tambourine Man’ was playing at full volume as Gary made his way back from the bar. ‘Here you are, babe,’ he said, holding out a glass.
‘Thanks.’ Penny smiled up at him, her eyes alight. ‘Cheers.’
Gary raised his pint of beer and chinked it against her Babycham. ‘Cheers.’
‘To us,’ said Penny, gazing adoringly at him. Gary smiled but didn’t say anything. Instead he nodded his head to the beat.
‘Fancy a dance?’ Penny turned towards the dance floor, which was filling up with people swaying to the jangling guitars of the song. ‘I like this one.’
‘Know what you mean, doll, but I’ll finish my drink first,’ Gary said, putting his arm around her waist. ‘It’s thirsty work, taking a beautiful girl like you out.’
‘Gary, you don’t half say daft things,’ Penny giggled, but she was flattered. He was the best-looking bloke in the whole club and she could see some of the other girls giving her envious glances, though she pretended not to notice. She didn’t want to seem smug, but she definitely felt pleased with herself. She knew she wasn’t as beautiful as some of them but it didn’t matter, because Gary had chosen her. He had even given up on Rhona getting better to ask her out. Sometimes Penny felt a little guilty and a small internal voice would say that he’d been a bit impatient, but she was too thrilled to pay it much attention. After all, she reasoned, Rhona herself had said he was a free agent. She sucked in her stomach and pouted, trying to look like the women she’d seen in magazines. Sometimes she had to pinch herself at the thought that she’d come here for the first time only in March, and now, just four months later, she was with the sexiest man in the place. She’d really dressed up this evening, in new shoes that pinched her toes and extra-long false eyelashes that had taken ages to get right, but you couldn’t go out looking any old how when you were meeting Gary.
The music changed to ‘The Price of Love’ but the dance floor stayed crowded. She moved in time to the beat, leaning against Gary. She felt him move his arm. ‘Sorry …’ she began, turning towards him to apologise, thinking he hadn’t liked it. Then she saw why he’d dropped his arm.
Rhona was standing in front of them.
Penny’s jaw dropped. Hastily she looked up at Gary. He was smiling as if he hadn’t got a care in the world.
‘Look who it is!’ he said. ‘Didn’t realise you were better. Welcome back.’
Rhona just looked at him, raising an eyebrow. ‘Hi, Gary,’ she said eventually. ‘I see you’ve moved on.’
‘Well, you didn’t expect me to stay at home just because you was sick, did you?’ he said in surprise. ‘I knew you wouldn’t mind. We had fun but that was all it was, you know that. It’s not as if we made any promises or anything.’
Rhona kept her cool. ‘Of course not, Gary. No commitments either way. That’s how we wanted it.’ She directed her gaze at Penny, who couldn’t meet her eyes but stared towards the floor, at her new high-heeled shoes. ‘Well, I won’t disturb you two love birds. See ya.’
‘OK. See ya,’ said Gary, an expression of relief on his face.
The chorus came on and the Everly Brothers sang in harmony, ‘The price of love, the price of love …’
Penny didn’t look up as Rhona swept across the dance floor to the other side of the crowded club. For a moment she hesitated. Then she slammed down her drink and went after her friend, leaving Gary bemused with his pint.
Rhona pushed her way into the ladies, which seemed to be empty. Then she looked in the mirror and saw the door was opening again, and Penny appeared. She spun round.
‘You’ve got a nerve coming in here,’ she spat, any attempts at staying cool gone. ‘What the hell do you think you’re playing at? Getting off with my boyfriend as soon as my back’s turned?’
‘No, Rhona, don’t be like that.’ Penny tried to placate her. ‘It wasn’t like that, honest. We couldn’t help ourselves …’
‘Couldn’t help yourselves, my Aunt Fanny.’ Rhona threw up her hands in disbelief. ‘Don’t give me that, Penny. I get bloody glandular fever and you step over me to nab my boyfriend. Fine friend you are. And then you come round to my house and tell me you met someone! It was him all along, wasn’t it? You had the nerve to sit in my own bedroom asking advice about if you should sleep with my boyfriend. Well you can sling your hook. You pathetic excuse for a friend. You wouldn’t even have met him if it wasn’t for me and first chance you get you go and cop off with him behind my back. Get out!’ She pointed to the door. ‘Get out of my sight!’
‘Please, Rhona, listen, I didn’t do it to hurt you.’ Penny was gabbling now, tears beginning to fall from her eyes, magnified by the heavy make-up and enormous lashes. ‘Really, we were just swept away. I came here one night and there he was—’
‘I don’t want to know,’ snarled Rhona. ‘You can dress it up any way you like, but you’ve done the dirty on a friend and there’s no way back from that one. I don’t care about your excuses, you can even believe them if you like, but I trusted you and you took advantage when I was down. You disgust me, just get out.’
‘But I love him,’ cried Penny, wiping her nose on her sleeve. ‘You don’t understand—’
‘No, Penny, it’s you who doesn’t understand.’ Rhona spoke very steadily now. ‘Get this into your head. You’ve betrayed your best friend. Love’s got nothing to do with it. Don’t come crying to me when it all goes wrong, which it will, ’cos now I know Gary’s a two-timing bastard who’ll do anything as long as he can get his leg over. If you’re happy with that, fine. And by the way you better get yourself another job ’cos Forsyth has given in after my mum wrote to the manager saying I was ill and I’m going back to the factory. If you’re still there when I go back I’ll make your life a misery and tell everyone what you’ve done.’
‘You wouldn’t.’ Penny gasped in horror at the thought of having to tell her mother why she couldn’t go back to work.
‘You know I would and Jean will have your guts for garters for a start. So you better look elsewhere, you sneaky bitch. I never want to see your lying little face again.’ Rhona pointed at the door once more. ‘Now get out.’
Crying unstoppably now, Penny gave way to the force of her friend’s anger and beat a retreat, pausing only to take a handful of toilet roll to wipe her ruined eyes.
Rhona waited for a moment after the door had slammed behind her old friend, leaning against the cool tiles on the wall. Her head was spinning. She’d come here thinking that she’d fall into Gary’s arms and he’d kiss her in happiness at being reunited. Then they’d share a few drinks and maybe go back to his place, and all the magic of when they’d first met would reignite. How wrong she had been.
Slowly Rhona pushed herself upright and made her way to one of the toilet stalls. She locked herself in, pulled down the lid and cautiously sat on it, relieved it wasn’t broken like some of them were. Only then did she allow the tears that had been threatening since she’d seen the couple to fall, and she sobbed into her balled-up cardigan, covering it in mascara. Despite all her experience of men she’d allowed Gary to get through her defences and now all her dreams were in tatters.
Rhona told herself off for being stupid enough to dream th
em in the first place, but it didn’t help as for the first time in her life she felt her heart break. Gary had turned out to be a lowlife cheating scumbag and yet she couldn’t stop herself from crying, for everything she’d wanted him to be but he wasn’t. She cried and cried, for his betrayal and treachery – but also for the utter betrayal by a young woman she’d thought of as a trusted friend.
Chapter Fifteen
‘Welcome back,’ said Jean, as Rhona walked through the factory door for the first time since Easter. ‘Didn’t think we’d see you round here again.’
‘I just couldn’t keep away,’ grinned Rhona. ‘Mum kicked up such a stink when they tried to sack me when I was ill that the manager gave in. Thanks for the card. It was nice to know you hadn’t all forgotten me.’
‘Not much chance of that,’ said Jean briskly. ‘Here, better get your overall on. Blimey, it’s too big for you now, isn’t it? You’ve lost heaps of weight.’
‘I know.’ Rhona looked at the hated garment, which now hung loosely on her. ‘I needed to come back to earn some money to buy new clothes. All my stuff just drops off me now.’
‘You could pass for Jean Shrimpton,’ said Jean, thinking that her young colleague was now far too thin. ‘Well, I must say I’m glad to see you back. You know Penny’s left, don’t you? Handed in her notice in a hurry and was off and away, no real goodbyes or nothing.’
‘Yeah, I heard.’ Rhona made herself busy with her locker.
Jean watched her critically. ‘You two had a falling-out? You was thick as thieves before.’
‘Nah, not really.’ Rhona wouldn’t look at the older woman. ‘I think she’s got some new friends.’
‘Maybe it’s just as well, she was getting unreliable,’ said Jean. ‘OK, Forsyth will probably be down in a minute but let’s get you started on something.’
‘Oh God, I could do without seeing him,’ sighed Rhona. ‘I bet he’s still got it in for me.’