Five

by Blythe, Jane

  “I don’t want to remember,” Eliza whimpered.

  “I know you don’t, but you do, and you love your sisters so much that what Malachi did to you is breaking down. His hold on you is weakening.”

  “I'm scared of him.” Tears slid down Eliza’s white cheeks.

  Unsure what to say or do, Maegan hung back and allowed Laura to do all the talking. Eliza had always been so strong, so confident, never showing fear. Even once she was brainwashed and walked around in a fog, she was always the big sister, taking care of Maegan and the other girls. Seeing Eliza like this, so scared and trembly, was unnerving.

  “But not so scared that you didn’t attempt another escape. You deliberately overdosed yourself, didn’t you?” Laura challenged.

  Shocked, Maegan awaited Eliza’s reply. She had thought it was Malachi who had accidentally given Eliza too many pills. She had thought that Eliza was too brainwashed to even consider attempting another escape.

  Slowly, Eliza nodded.

  “He’s been feeding you sleeping pills since he brainwashed you, to keep you under control. But he stopped while you were pregnant. You started to remember things. When the baby was born, he wanted you to start taking them again, but you didn’t. You kept them. You wanted to get yourself and the others out of that house, so you took the pills. You knew Malachi would bring you here, because you’re his daughter’s mother. He couldn’t risk anything happening to you.”

  “He’s obsessed with having children,” Eliza whispered. “He was so pleased when Arianna was a girl, but I wanted her to be a boy. So he couldn’t do anything to her.”

  “How long after he took you did he starting abusing you?” Laura asked gently.

  “Immediately,” Eliza sniffed. “But he didn’t start with Maegan until her thirteenth birthday. I knew he’d do the same to Bethie, Hayley, and Arianna. I couldn’t protect Maegan, so I had to protect the others.”

  Finally, Maegan crossed to the bed. “It wasn't your fault, Eliza. What Malachi did to me, there wasn't anything you could have done to stop it.”

  “I failed you,” Eliza cried.

  “No. No,” she repeated. “You did everything you could to save us. To protect us from Malachi. I know he did terrible things to you every time you tried to get us help.” Maegan was crying now, too, and threw herself into Eliza’s arms.

  Laura gave them a moment before she continued. “Eliza, we need you. You know Malachi better than anyone else. Do you know where he would go?”

  “The house,” Eliza replied immediately.

  “We found the house. Malachi blew it up,” Laura told her.

  That surprised her. “He loved that house, he was obsessed with it. He must be desperate.”

  “Can you think of any other place he may go?” Laura pushed.

  She closed her eyes in concentration. Tears continued to trickle out. After a couple of minutes of silence, Eliza opened her eyes, looking at them apologetically. “I'm sorry, my head is all fuzzy. I can't think properly. I remember Malachi talking to me, but I can't make out the words.”

  Perfectly hiding the disappointment Maegan knew she must be feeling, Laura smiled reassuringly. “That’s okay, Eliza. It will come to you. You just have to keep trying. I know those memories can be scary, but you can't run from them. We need you. Maegan needs you. Bethany, Hayley, and Arianna need you.”

  Maegan wanted to tell Laura off for pressuring Eliza, even though she’d known that was the whole point of talking to her. But before she could, there was a knock at the door.

  A moment later, it swung open and Jack stuck his head in. “Maegan, your family is here.”

  TWENTY-NINE YEARS AGO

  9:22 A.M.

  Was he awake?

  Malachi wasn't altogether sure.

  The last thing he remembered was his birthday.

  He and his father had gone for ice cream. Only his father had stopped at an alley on the way to run an errand. The errand turned out to be a secret meeting with his mistress. His father had wanted to end things with her, but she hadn’t wanted to. She’d jumped in the car with them. Continued to beg his father not to break up with her.

  Then she had grabbed the steering wheel, causing the car to crash into a brick wall.

  Had he been killed?

  Had he just woken up in heaven?

  Or hell?

  He really didn’t know.

  Perhaps it was because his head was aching so badly it felt like it was on fire.

  Maybe he really was in hell.

  It couldn’t be heaven, because there was no pain in heaven, right?

  Counting heaven out, he was either dead and in hell or alive and badly hurt.

  Was he still in the car?

  Had the accident just happened?

  No, it couldn’t have because he was someplace quiet. Not on a busy street.

  And he was someplace soft and comfortable. Not still in a car.

  Someone was holding his hand.

  Malachi tried to open his eyes but found he could only crack them open a slit.

  He wasn't dead.

  He wasn't in hell.

  He was in a hospital room.

  Now that his eyes were opened, he realized his head wasn't the only thing that hurt.

  His entire body ached with an agony he had never experienced before.

  Beside his bed sat his mother.

  She was clutching his hand.

  She didn’t notice he was awake.

  As he looked at her, he realized something was different.

  Not her, him.

  Something was different with him.

  He had changed somehow.

  He could feel it in his bones.

  * * * * *

  7:58 P.M.

  The next time he awoke, Malachi found he wasn't in pain.

  Only he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

  This time he didn’t hesitate to open his eyes.

  He was still in a hospital.

  And his mother still sat at his side.

  Almost immediately, she noticed he was awake.

  A smile lit her pretty face as she jumped to her feet and began to smother him in kisses.

  “Malachi, you're alive, you're awake. They said you wouldn’t survive. They said you’d never wake up.”

  “How long?” he tried to ask, but all that came out was a croaky squawk.

  “Here, baby.” His mother held a straw to his lips, and he drank greedily, albeit clumsily.

  “How long?” he asked again. His voice was weak, faint, insubstantial.

  “Seven months.” Tears were streaming down his mother’s beautiful face. How could his father even think of cheating on such a woman? “You’ve been in a coma for seven months.”

  Seven months?

  How could so much time have passed while he’d been just lying here sleeping?

  “I thought you'd never wake up,” his mother sobbed. “They said you wouldn’t. I kept praying you'd come back to me, but the days and weeks and months kept ticking by. I love you so much, my sweet little boy. I couldn’t handle losing you, too.”

  Losing him, too?

  That must mean his father …

  “Your daddy didn’t survive, baby.” His mother held his face in her hands. “The car was going too fast; he was killed instantly.”

  Something was wrong with him.

  He didn’t feel anything.

  No anger, no hurt, no disappointment, no grief over his father’s death. No thankfulness at being alive, no joy, no excitement, no trepidation or apprehension at the long recovery process to come. No fear at whether or not he would be the same as he’d been before.

  He already knew he wouldn’t.

  He was different.

  Changed.

  He had lost the ability to feel emotion.

  It was gone.

  Simply gone.

  “Oh, baby, are you okay? Are you really okay?” Not waiting for an answer, she began to kiss him all over his f
ace again. “I love you, baby. I love you so much. I love you. I love you. I love you.”

  He loved her, too.

  His mother.

  His responsibility now.

  He was thirteen.

  A man.

  The man of the house now that his father was dead.

  It was Malachi’s job to take his father’s place.

  And he would do a better job of running the family than his father had.

  His father was a cheater. He had jeopardized the family by his affair. He was weak and pathetic. A useless excuse for a man.

  A man should be strong. A leader. A man should demand respect from those around him. He should be confident and self-assured. A man should always be in control.

  A man should take care of his family. Provide for them. Protect them.

  A man should be everything that his father wasn't.

  Malachi would learn from his father’s mistakes. He wouldn’t repeat them.

  He had learned a lot about women, too.

  A woman should be subservient.

  She should obey.

  She should respect a man as having authority over her.

  Not like that woman. Threatening his father. Trying to tell him what to do. Trying to break up his family.

  That woman had tried to kill him.

  He would never let anyone be in a position to do that to him again.

  He would lead his family. Guide them. Rule them.

  He would not let his sisters turn out like that willful woman.

  Ariyel was sixteen, Alice was ten, Angela was four, and Abigail just a baby.

  They were his responsibility, too.

  And he took his responsibilities very seriously.

  NOVEMBER 4th

  2:00 A.M.

  2:08 A.M.

  Home.

  Maegan couldn’t believe that she was really about to see her family again after five long years.

  Her stomach was an absolute swirling mess of nerves.

  Her parents were waiting for her in an unoccupied hospital room. All she had to do was open the door and walk inside. Yet something was stopping her.

  “You okay?” Laura asked quietly.

  She nodded. She was okay. Wasn't she? Why didn’t she just go into the room and throw herself into her parents’ arms? What was stopping her?

  “It’s okay to be nervous. Five years is a long time,” Laura said gently.

  “Things won't be the same.” Maegan knew she could never, no matter how much she wanted and no matter how much her parents wanted, go back to the way they'd been before.

  “No, they won't,” Laura agreed.

  “Was it hard with your family after your abduction?” she asked. She knew that Laura didn’t like to talk about it, but she needed answers from someone who’d been through something similar to what she had.

  “Yes, it was,” Laura answered honestly. “I was struggling to make sense of what had happened to me, to process it, to deal with my own feelings and emotions. I couldn’t deal with theirs, as well. I ran. I hid from them—from everyone—for ten years. If Jack hadn’t stumbled upon me, I'd still be hiding. Now I wish I hadn’t hid. I wish I hadn’t lost ten years of my life—I can't ever get them back.”

  “Are things okay with your family now?”

  “Not really. They’re better, and I see them, but I feel guilty for shutting them out when they were suffering, too. I feel like I was selfish. I should have let them help me. They needed to be there for me for their own healing, and I denied them that. My guilt makes me not like to be around them. I'm much closer with Jack’s family than my own. I have a lot of regrets, Maegan. I don’t want you to have them, too. I wish I could give you a magic answer that will make your transition back into the normal world smooth, but I can't. There isn’t one. You just have to do what feels right for you at the time.”

  It both reassured her and stressed her more to know how difficult things had been for Laura. What they'd been through was different. Laura’s abduction had been only a few days but extremely intense and left her fighting for her life. Hers had been much longer but not as intense. But both had been terrifying and life changing.

  “Laura, do you think it would be okay if—”

  “Of course,” Laura cut her off, “you can talk to me any time you want.”

  “Thanks.” It made her feel a little better to have a safe place to go when she needed someone to talk to.

  There was no putting it off any longer. That wasn't going to make things easier. With a steadying breath, she pushed open the door and stepped inside.

  Her mom and dad were holding hands. They both turned toward the door when they heard it open. For a long moment the three of them just stared at each other. Her parents looked so much older than she remembered. But, at the same time, they still looked the same.

  Maegan had been unsure right up until she saw them about how she’d feel. Now that they were standing right in front of her, watching her closely, presumably unsure about how she would react to them, she felt a wave of relief wash over her.

  Everything was going to be okay.

  Rushing at her parents, she threw herself into her mother’s arms.

  Five years’ worth of tears came out in a flood. Clinging to her mother like she used to when she was a very little girl, Maegan wept for what felt like forever.

  Her mother cried, too, holding her tightly, stroking her hair, and murmuring soothingly in her ear.

  Her father held them both. He was crying, as well.

  She had missed them so much.

  She loved them so much.

  Loved them so much her heart was aching with it.

  “Mommy,” she whimpered, her face in her mother’s neck.

  “I'm here, baby,” her mother whispered back. “I'm here and no one is going to take you from me ever again.”

  Maegan wished her mother could really guarantee her that. But she knew no one could. Not only was Malachi still on the loose, and as such a threat to her and her sisters, but there were more monsters out there than people realized. And any one of them could hurt her.

  “Are you okay, princess?” her father asked, picking her up as though she were a child. His eyes scanned her frantically as though he was worried she might be injured.

  Malachi had never hurt her in a way that had left physical scars, so she didn’t know how to answer her father’s question. She wasn't comfortable talking about being raped with anyone, let alone her parents. And even though she didn’t have any noticeable wounds, she wasn't okay. She would never be the same person she’d been before. She would never grow into the same woman she would have had she not been kidnapped. She felt so many things that she didn’t think she could untangle them all and explain them to anyone.

  Knowing her father needed an answer, she mustered up a smile for him. “I'm all right, Daddy.”

  And she would be.

  Jack and Xavier would find Malachi. They would arrest him, and he would go to jail where he couldn’t hurt her or anyone else ever again. She would go home where her parents and the rest of her family would help her to heal.

  Maybe one day, she would get better.

  Maybe one day, she would move past what had happened and have a normal life.

  Right now, though, she had to take it one day at a time, and when that was too hard, one minute at a time.

  * * * * *

  2:12 A.M.

  “Hey, I thought you were sleeping.” Xavier smiled at Eliza as she opened her eyes.

  She shook her head. “I'm tired, but I can't sleep. Not knowing he’s out there somewhere.”

  Xavier wished there was something he could say to take away Eliza’s fears, but he knew there wasn't.

  He wished there was something he could say to work things out with Annabelle, too.

  He should have gone after her when she was here earlier. He knew she wanted him to, but how many times could he go running after her before she finally realized that he was always going to be th
ere for her?

  Xavier didn’t want her to keep testing him. It made him feel inadequate, and he had done everything within his power to help Annabelle.

  It was just never enough.

  Would it ever be enough?

  He was beginning to think it wouldn’t be.

  He had meant every word he’d said to Annabelle. He loved her very much, but he wasn't the one pushing her away. And if she wasn't one hundred percent into their relationship, then he would reluctantly move on.

  Xavier wanted it all: wife, kids, a family. And if Annabelle didn’t want those things, then he would find someone who did. It had been a complete surprise when she’d turned down his first proposal. A horrible surprise. He had gone all out. They’d been on vacation at the beach; they’d ridden horses through the shallow waves, then had a romantic picnic on the soft white sand, then he’d gotten down on one knee and asked her to marry him. It had never occurred to him that she’s say no. She had assured him that she loved him and that she did want to marry him, but that she needed more time.

  Like an idiot, he had given it to her.

  When he had proposed again, he’d been positive that this time Annabelle was going to say yes.

  He’d been wrong again.

  This time, not only had she said no and that she wasn't ready, but she’d also broken the news that she was going to be moving out for a while.

  There wasn't going to be a third time. He wasn't so stupid that he couldn’t take a hint. Annabelle didn’t want to marry him. And since she had moved out, he was taking it as a sign that it was over between them.

  Xavier didn’t want to move on. He wanted things to work out with Annabelle. He wanted them to have their happily ever after. Badly. But he also knew that, sometimes in life, you don’t always get what you want.

  He focused his attention back on the terrified woman in the bed. Annabelle may not want him anymore, but Eliza needed him. And sometimes it was nice to be needed.

  “We are going to find him, Eliza,” he promised.