Since it rained the past few days, it’s good to see the sun is finally out. Maybe it’s a good sign. I leave the house right after rush hour, so traffic has died down and there’s barely anyone on the streets. I get to the studio as I planned, early. There’s craziness going on outside with people everywhere. I walk in the door and see everything is different. There’s a notice that we’re on the first level today. I follow the signs to a large open space that looks more like a warehouse than a dance studio.
As soon as I walk in I see this huge green screen up along the back of one wall and the floor is padded with soft tiles in the same green color. There are props everywhere. A fake bedroom set is on one side and an outdoor gazebo scene is on the other. There’s a lot of activity. People are everywhere—setting up cameras, moving things around and changing lighting. I see Linda and Pamela sitting off to the side talking. They still have on their regular street clothes. I go over to them. “Hey, what’s up? What’s with all the people and cameras outside?”
“Taj has an interview on one of the music cable shows so she wants this to be a dress rehearsal.”
Shit. “A dress rehearsal—but I forgot to bring the bag.”
“Doesn’t matter, they’ve changed the costume again.”
“Thank God,” I say, obviously relieved.
“Not so fast. It could be worse, if that’s even possible,” Pam says, chuckling.
“What could be worse than that hot mess?” I ask.
“I guess we’ll see in a little bit,” Linda adds.
“What’s with the video camera in here, too? Are they filming us today also?”
“Nah, Taj is trying to sell a reality show to television.”
“A reality show about what? Her?” I ask.
Linda and Pamela laugh. “Kenisha, haven’t you caught on yet? Whatever it is, it’s always about Taj.”
I sit down with them and just watch the craziness unfold. I see that there are a lot more people here now, including a guy who is absolutely gorgeous. “Wow, who’s he?”
“He’s the model for the video shoot.”
I look around. “Where are Donna and Connie?”
“They quit,” Linda says.
“They what?” I say, surprised to hear this. “Why?”
“Are you kidding? Do you even have to ask? This is the worst job in the business. Who can really blame them for quitting?” Linda says.
“What are they gonna do now?”
“I spoke with them last night,” Pam says. “They both got new jobs, so it’s all good.”
A few minutes later Money Train comes in. He looks around, then sees us sitting here. He smiles and nods, but mainly at Linda. She gets up and goes over to him. Anybody can see that there’s more than just a passing friendship between them. I look at Pam. “What’s the…”
Pam just shakes her head. “Don’t even say it.”
I don’t. I watch as she pulls him close and whispers something into his ear. He’s smiling. After a while they walk away. I just shake my head. A few minutes after that Taj comes in from the front door with her usual entourage. But this time she has a plus one—Terrence is with her. I swear my jaw drops to the floor.
He just walks in like it’s no big deal. I watch, speechless, as he looks around the huge area casually and then he sees me. He’s stunned at first and then he smiles and gets ready to come over to me. Taj grabs his arms and holds tight. Then he removes her hand and comes to me. “Hey,” he says, smiling that smile that always gets to me.
“Hey,” I say nonchalantly. Pam gets up to find Linda.
“I’ve been calling you,” Terrence says.
“Yeah, I know” is all I say, without offering any more of an explanation for not getting back to him. There’s one thing that’s certain about Terrence—he’s no fool. He knows I’m pissed, he knows why and he knows he’s wrong.
“So what are you doing here?”
“I’m working,” I say. “What about you? What are you doing here?” Just as I say the words, I see Taj hurrying over to us.
“Hey, I guess you see my surprise,” Taj says as she grabs Terrence’s arm and holds on to him just like I did the first time we met after the party that night. But then I was holding my lawnmower guy’s arm, not her. So now I’m just looking at her holding him. My thoughts go in a million different directions—none of them good.
“Taj told me she had a special surprise on the set of her video and that I should come down and check it out,” he says, answering the question I almost forgot I even asked.
I look at Taj. She’s wearing a thick terry robe and stilettos and her makeup is already done. Her hair is weaved blond and long all the way down her back, then teased out in big wild waves. She’s just standing there smiling at me. But it’s more than just a smile. It’s that catty shit I know all too well. Then she tilts her head. “Surprise.”
“Are you staying for the whole thing?” I ask him, ignoring her.
“Nah, I’m going to class this afternoon.”
“Aw,” Taj says, poking her lower lip out babyishly.
I know his class schedule. He has a communications lecture this afternoon. We start talking about the assignment he has to turn in today. It’s one I helped him with. So we’re laughing about the assignment and Taj is looking completely left out. She’s just standing there looking stupid.
“Well, maybe I can convince you to skip class and stay with me.”
“Nah, school trumps videos.”
“Are you sure I can’t tempt you?” Taj says as she starts rubbing his chest. He stops her and moves her hand away and looks at me. I just shake my head.
Okay, I am too pissed. I just look at her. She did all this shit on purpose—why, I have no idea. If she thinks she’s getting my lawnmower guy, she’s wrong. Just then Magic Man comes over to us, clapping his hands to get our attention.
“Okay, okay, we’re on the clock, people. Let’s do this. You have thirty minutes to change into the costumes and stretch. Let’s go.”
I look at Terrence. “I gotta get ready to…”
“Go, yes. Don’t worry. He’s fine. I’ll take good care of him,” Taj says, rubbing her chest against his arm on purpose.
I just turn and leave. Pam walks up beside me as I head to one of the dressing rooms in the back. We each have a small cubby to put our things and to change. She holds up the hanger with her costume. “Check it out, not too bad,” she says.
I hold mine up, too. It’s a pair of white skintight dance pants with a matching tank top and white army boots. There’s also a midriff white fur jacket. “Oh, my God, this is so much better than that other outfit. Thank God,” I say again.
“For real.” She obviously agrees. “Hey, who was that guy with Taj?” she asks. “Do you know him?”
“Believe it or not, that was my boyfriend,” I say.
“Golden rule, Kenisha—never bring your man to within twenty miles of Taj.”
“I didn’t bring him. She did.”
“Damn,” Pam says, “that’s a new low even for her. I swear she’s like a man vacuum. She literally sucks them in, and I don’t mean that figuratively. And if they’re not interested in her on their own, she goes after them full force until they are. I learned that lesson the hard way.”
“The hard way? What do you mean?” I say, changing into my sweats and tank top.
“Taj went after my boyfriend about a year ago. After she got him to prove that she could, she dumped him.”
“Damn, just like that.”
“Yep, just like that. I think it’s the attention. It’s some kind of ego boost. I’m sure Sigmund Freud would love a conversation with her,” Pam says, bending and stretching her legs out.
I think about my psycholog
ist, Dr. Tubbs. I can just see him trying to figure her crazy ass out. “Did you take him back?” I ask, getting down on the floor to start stretching, too.
“Oh, hell, no, his shit is old. I figured that if he’s weak enough to follow after someone like her, he doesn’t deserve someone like me. Besides, I’m seeing someone so much better.”
“But I don’t get it. She did that to you and you’re still here dancing with her. Why?”
“Money,” she says, “this job pays good money and I need it. College classes aren’t cheap. I put up with her bullshit for one reason—to make the money.”
“You’re not the only one. Money’s the only reason I’m here, too.”
Fifteen minutes later Linda joins us. We’ve stretched and are getting ready to do a quick run-through. Taj, still in her robe, is sitting with her entourage and the reality show film crew, talking. I look around for Terrence, expecting to see him somewhere around her, but he’s not. He’s over talking to the guy setting up the music. I look back at Taj—she’s watching Terrence, too.
Devon, Magic Man and the director call us over to see the video storyboards. Our part is basically dancing our routine with Taj in front of us. Then it ends with Taj lying on a fur rug holding on to the male model. The song is called I Got Him Now. The basic idea is that we’re his past lovers and she has him now.
Afterward, Magic Man walks us through the moves to make sure the timing is right. Then he talks to Taj about her part. She’s all smiles and laughter for the reality show camera, acting like she actually knows what she’s doing.
“All right, let’s try this,” the director says. I put on my fur jacket. Pam puts on her tuxedo jacket and Linda puts on her military jacket. Taj takes off her robe. She’s dressed in a skin-colored too-skimpy bra top with matching too-tight boy’s briefs and six-inch stiletto thigh-high boots. She gets in place in front of us. The music starts. She begins lip-syncing the song. She’s doing her dance steps awkwardly as we dance our routine. The model is in place and she’s making everything look awkward. She stops suddenly and complains that the set is too noisy.
The director makes just about everyone leave, except Taj’s entourage and the reality show film crew. We try the routine once more. This time we get all the way through, ending with her and the model on the fur-topped bed. Now she complains that we’re not doing the right steps and we’re throwing her off. We try it again. Halfway through we stop.
“This is all bullshit!” Taj yells. Everybody looks at her. “This is my video and I know what I want and how I want it and this isn’t it.” She goes over to the director, Magic Man and Devon.
“Taj, this is exactly what we talked about,” Magic Man says. “We’ve been practicing this routine for the past two weeks. What’s wrong with it?”
“I want it different, sexier.” She pouts. “Get rid of him. He’s all wrong. There’s no chemistry. There’s no way anyone is gonna believe he’s my man. He’s pathetic.”
“Excuse me,” the guy says, “I’m a top-paid model. I don’t need this diva drama and her attitude.” He walks away.
“All right, wait, hold up. Everybody just calm down. We can make this work. Taj, trust me, the two of you look perfect up there.”
“No, I’m not feeling it,” she insists. “I need somebody real—somebody that stands out. Someone my fans can relate to and connect with.”
“What are you talking about?” Devon says.
She stops a minute and then looks around at all of us. “Just get rid of him. I have a better idea.”
They call the model back over. A few seconds later he starts cussing, then grabs his stuff and storms out.
“What’s all that about?” I ask quietly.
“What else? More Taj drama,” Linda says.
“Looks like she fired the model,” Pamela says.
“So now how is she supposed to…” I begin, but don’t have to finish. I know exactly what she’s gonna do.
“Terrence, can you come over here?” she purrs.
One of the guys at the mix table hits Terrence’s arm. He removes the headphones and looks up at me. Taj calls him over to her again. He goes over. They speak a moment with Devon and the director. I can’t hear what they’re saying, but I know exactly what’s going on. Taj got rid of the model to use Terrence in the love scene. They’re nodding their heads as Taj talks. Terrence shakes his head no, then walks away.
I’m standing to the side and he comes right to me. “I gotta get to class. I’ll call you later,” he says. I nod and smile. He kisses me and leaves. I can see Taj is furious.
Twenty-One
Blindsided by BS
kenishi_wa K Lewis
I wonder why I’m doing this. Then all of the sudden I know—’cause nobody else will. At some point you have to stand up to the stupidity.
10 May * Like * Comment * Share
we start dancing again and I’m kicking my ass working hard. It’s more and more apparent that Taj can’t keep up. The other people here know, the director knows and she sure as hell knows. So we keep going, hitting every movement exactly as Magic Man wants. Taj, on the other hand, keeps making us stop and complaining about how we’re too close to her and she feels crowded and we’re cramping her style and messing her up. At one point she stops and just screams. We all stop instantly and just stand looking at her crazy ass.
Two of her entourage go to her with a towel and water. She talks to them as we stand there wiping sweat from our faces. She looks in the mirror and scowls. “What the hell are you doing behind me,” she yells. Her reality film crew steps up and starts filming again.
We all look around to see who she’s talking to. Then I realize she’s yelling at me. “Yeah, you, what’s wrong with you? What’s your problem? Can’t you take directions? Obviously I made a mistake in trying to give your snot ass a chance and get your poor no-class ass out of the ghetto. Can’t you see that you’re screwing us up?”
My jaw drops. I can’t believe she’s gonna stand there and call me out for her stiff no-dancing ass. “I’m doing the routine Magic Man showed me,” I defend myself.
“Are you saying I’m wrong, that I don’t know what I’m doing?”
Duh, it’s obvious that she can’t dance and she’s an idiot, too. But I know I can’t say that, so I just smile ’cause I need the money. “I’m saying that I’m doing what I’m supposed to.”
She’s really going off now, screaming and moving closer and closer to me. Her entourage steps up to back her. “What, you can’t hear me? I’m talking to you. This is supposed to make me look good, to highlight me. Don’t you get it? I’m the star here. I’m the one people pay money to see, not your no-dancing ass. It’s all about me.”
“Like I said, I’m doing the steps and routine Magic Man taught us, then changed so you can keep up,” I say.
I can see the fury blaze in her eyes. I don’t exactly call her out for being the one that keeps screwing up, but I definitely make it plain that she needs to look at her own shit. So all of a sudden she comes toward me and nearly trips on her high heels. One of her girls grabs her arm to prevent her from falling. She quickly shakes her off like she’s being held back. It’s so stupid it’s comical. A couple of the other people snicker and she glares at them, but keeps her anger focused on me.
Now she’s really screaming all up in my face, telling me how I can’t dance and how she was wrong to include me. Oh, my God, I swear she smells like pure alcohol. No wonder she’s messing up. She’s drunk.
I don’t move, but I swear nothing is worth this heffer screaming at me. I ball up my fist like my mom taught me and I’m just about to knock the shit out of her when all of a sudden Pamela comes over and pulls my arms away. “We got this, Taj,” she says.
“Yeah, you’d better handle your girl and teach her how
things work around here. Nobody makes me look bad.”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her that nobody has to make her look bad, she’s looking bad all by herself, but Linda steps up, blocking us. They pull me away and start talking. At this point I’m really not hearing it. I’m too pissed. I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I know I can dance and I know I’m doing everything the other dancers are doing. It’s not me.
Now she’s completely surrounded by her entourage. They’re trying to calm her down. “Don’t be all up in my face, Devon, you need to talk to Magic Man and the rest of those skanky dancers. Better yet, get rid of all of them. I don’t need them. I’m the star. I’m the only one here who knows what’s up. They can’t even dance—none of them.”
Magic Man steps up and pulls Taj and her whole crew off to the side. Now we’re just standing around and all you can hear is her screaming and yelling about getting no respect and how she wants more money and how she’s the next Beyoncé and everybody around her are jealous assholes.
The director comes over to us. “Look, Taj is under some stress. You’re all doing a great job. We’re gonna order some Chinese food. What do you want?”
By now we’ve been here all morning and afternoon. I’m starved, but there’s no way I want anything from Taj. So he keeps going on that Taj needs to eat something and she’s a little irritable. Is he joking? She’s a friggin’ lunatic. I’ve never seen anybody go mental like that, not even Courtney, and she the craziest person I know.
“I’m done here.” I head to the dressing room to get my stuff. Pamela and Linda follow, trying to get me to calm down. Magic Man stops me and asks me to stay. “No, I don’t need this.”
“Where do you think you’re going?” Taj says, following me.
“As far away from your crazy ass as possible,” I say, getting my stuff from the cubby.
“Bullshit. You need to get back here. I own you. You signed a contract,” she says, playing to the camera still filming her.
I start laughing and open my dance bag. I pull out the large white envelope Devon gave me. I never signed it. I toss it at her. “You mean this contract? The one I never signed?”
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