A Preacher’s Passion

by Lutishia Lovely

  “Darius, baby,” she whispered between kisses. “I want to go on this trip with you. I miss you too much when you’re away. I promise not to be a bother. I can hang out in your hotel room and then come to the concerts at night.”

  With three in the bed, it might get rather crowded. “Next time, love. I promise, the next full concert we do out of town, you can come with me.” Oh, God, why did I just promise that? Bo’s gonna have my ass!

  “I guess that will have to be okay,” Stacy said, beginning her own oral orientation of Darius’s body. She tugged at each of his nipples until they hardened, then stopped suddenly. “When is this trip?”

  “Thanksgiving,” Darius muttered.

  Stacy stopped foreplay and sat up. “You’re joking, right?”

  “No, baby, it’s a holiday promotion. You know Shabach’s been working overtime since he lost out to me at the Stellars. I’m number one in gospel right now and he can’t stand it. I gotta keep up the momentum, Stacy.”

  “I understand that. Shabach’s been all over the place: radio, TV, Internet. But they won’t understand you bringing your girlfriend along on a holiday?”

  “They specifically discussed no one bringing significant others. They want us to be focused. We’re hitting like, five, six cities in seven days…. They want us to—”

  “You’re going to be gone a week? Through your birthday too?”

  “I know, baby, it sucks, big time. Which is why I’ve planned something special to make it up to you.”

  Stacy was in full pout mode: lips out, arms crossed. “What?”

  “This.” Darius rolled over and took an envelope from the nightstand; the envelope idea inspired by Bo’s Canadian trip gift to him two weeks earlier.

  “What’s this?” Stacy’s response matched Darius’s to Bo’s exactly when Bo had sprung their Thanksgiving vacation on him.

  “Open it and find out.” Exactly what Bo had said. The similarities would have been almost laughable if they weren’t so scary.

  Inside the linen, gold emblem-sealed envelope was a brochure, and on the cover a beautiful scene of a snow-covered mountain, transposed above another scene of a roaring fireplace in a cozy suite. Across the top of the brochure, the calligraphed words: “Big Bear.”

  “We’re going to Big Bear?” Stacy asked.

  “No, I thought I’d give the trip to my mother but wanted to see how you liked the brochure,” Darius responded sarcastically. His smile lessened the bite however, as did his hand drawing lazy figure eights across Stacy’s thigh.

  Stacy slapped him playfully with the pamphlet. “Smart butt.” She pulled out the remaining contents of the envelope and found brochures on skiing, hot air balloon rides, a business card for a limousine service, and a paper Christmas tree.

  Stacy yelped. “Christmas! We’re spending Christmas together! Okay, you exasperating man,” she said, rolling on top of Darius and wrestling him playfully. “You’ve just made up for me having to eat turkey with the crazy Grays.

  “You know I’ve lived in California my whole life and never gone to Big Bear? And I’ve only seen snow once, when we visited one of my uncles who lived in Indiana. Hope and Cy went to Big Bear last year. She said it was beautiful. I really admire them,” Stacy continued as she scanned the various brochures. “Hope and Cy. They have the type of relationship I wish, well, never mind.”

  “You wish we had, is that what you were going to say?”

  “Yes, it is. I love you, Darius. I want to spend my life with you. Is that wrong?”

  “No, Stacy, it’s not wrong. I love you too. And I like Hope and Cy,” he said, the businessman in him instantly thinking of ways he could network with the church’s most prosperous multimillionaire. “Maybe we can have dinner with them sometime, rub shoulders with somebody who has it all.”

  “Okay, baby,” she said. “I’ll set something up the next time I talk with Hope.”

  “Well, I’ve got something up right now,” Darius countered as he took Stacy’s hand and wrapped it around his hardened shaft. “Can we do something about that?”

  “Mm,” Stacy purred as she straddled him. “I definitely think we can.”

  19

  Take Care

  Lavon felt horrible. He’d avoided Passion for two weeks, hiding behind the production of the Kingdom Keys series. But she deserved better. He only hoped she would forgive him after he told her what she needed to know.

  Passion’s bright smile as he entered the hotel lobby’s coffee shop tugged at Lavon’s heart. He liked to think of himself as a decent man, as one who had put his player days behind him. He knew Passion was ready to trade in her celibate status for sex with him, but it couldn’t happen. What he had with Carla wasn’t over. It would make life simpler for him to have the feelings and attraction for Passion that he had for Carla, but this was not the case. He felt that this conversation would at least set one thing right.

  “Hey, Perfected Passion,” he said, kissing Passion lightly on the cheek before sitting down.

  “Hey, yourself,” Passion responded. She’d hoped for a steamier greeting, but it was the middle of the day in a coffee shop after all. She was using her lunch hour to meet with Lavon; he’d said it was the only time he had. “I’ve missed you.”

  Lavon forced himself not to squirm. “With only a few weeks until I return home, the schedule is crazy.”

  “How’s it going, the production? I’m really enjoying Pastor’s sermons, can already see how this series could be one for every believer’s library.”

  “Oh, definitely. Dr. Lee can preach and teach. That’s one of the things that makes production difficult—hard to find where to cut anything out. But I think everyone will be pleased with the final result.”

  They took a moment as the waiter came over. Passion ordered a turkey sandwich, Lavon, black coffee.

  “C’mon now, big man like you has to keep up his energy. You sure you’re not hungry? My treat…” Passion lifted her eyebrows suggestively while a smile kept the atmosphere light.

  “I had a big breakfast,” was Lavon’s reply. That his breakfast had included Carla assuaging all of his appetites was the tidbit left unsaid. He turned the conversation to the reason he’d agreed to meet with her.

  “Passion, I’m here to ask for your forgiveness,” he began sincerely. “I’ve taken this friendship farther than it ever should have gone.”

  Passion’s heart sank. “Lavon, we’re both adults. I think what’s happening here is what we both want.”

  “That’s just it, Passion. Nothing is happening here. I mean, nothing else can happen here, between us. I feel that I took advantage of you by acting like a free man, when I’m really not.”

  When Lavon had agreed to lunch, this is not what Passion had expected. Not this conversation—in fact, not much conversation at all. She’d held out hope that lunch would be ordered through room service, with a dessert that wasn’t on the menu.

  “Is this about your girl back in Kansas?” Passion was surprised at the hurt she felt, even as Lavon’s honesty impressed her. “Y’all been talking?”

  Lavon spoke a simple truth. “My heart is elsewhere, Passion. And you’re a good woman. It’s not fair to keep going down this road. I overstepped my bounds by spending the night with you. The liberties I took were inappropriate, even though we didn’t have sex.”

  Passion remembered Lavon’s hands under her nightgown, rubbing and massaging her bare skin before he’d rolled over and away from her to the other side of the bed.

  “I understand,” she said. But she didn’t, not really. Being celibate and righteous didn’t feel good at the moment. She regretted passing up the opportunity for a torrid night of love, one that may have led to a future with Lavon. But maybe it wasn’t too late….

  “I envy the woman in Kansas,” she continued truthfully. “I wish it were me. But I appreciate your being a man and coming correct like this before my heart really got twisted.”

  “Any man will thank his lucky stars to
get a woman like you, Passion. I mean that. Another day, another time, who knows what may have happened. But the situation is what it is. I’m sorry.”

  Passion reached for Lavon’s hand. “Don’t apologize, Lavon. We can’t always control our feelings, or our heart. And as much as I want you, I’m willing to respect your decision.”

  Even as she said these words, Passion envisioned a lifetime with the man in front of her. She didn’t want to totally close the door. “But does this mean we can’t be friends?”

  “That won’t be difficult for you? I don’t want to play with your feelings.”

  “I’m a big girl. Let me handle my heart, okay?”

  Lavon looked at his watch. It was time to head to the church for an afternoon of production. “Let’s just play it by ear, Passion. At least I’ll see you at church, right?”

  As kindly as they’d been spoken, Lavon’s words felt like a dismissal. Passion stood, as did Lavon.

  “Of course, I’ll see you at Logos. Take care of yourself,” she said, giving him a hug. She left the coffee shop without looking back.

  20

  Everything Except…

  Carla only half listened as Brianna went on and on about cheerleading. She loved her children immensely, and was especially close to her only daughter. Which is why she felt guilty at the relief she felt when they picked up Brianna’s friend and the two teenagers fell into their own private conversation.

  Truthfully, Carla’s lack of interest in her children wasn’t the only thing making her feel guilty; it was the lack of interest in her husband and the ministry. She knew it was also wrong, but Carla felt truly alive for the first time in years. It wasn’t just the sex, which was mind blowing, it was how Lavon made her feel: young and playful, desirable and valued. Even as she thought this she could hear Stanley’s voice in her ear, full of respect, admiration, and compliments. But it wasn’t the same. Stanley always seemed to come from an intellectual standpoint, where Lavon came from his heart. His magnetism was palpable, his appetite matched her own. Both she and Lavon knew they were playing with fire, felt their feelings for each other deepening. But neither was willing to give up what they had…each other.

  Carla wanted desperately to talk with someone about what was going on—but who? She thought of her sister and just as quickly dismissed the thought. Carla had always been the wild child while her sister, Marlyne, was the goody two-shoes. Marlyne had probably not even looked at another man since being married, much less thought of being with one intimately. Of course, talking to anyone at her church was out of the question. She thought about Vivian, Tai, or one of the other women in Ladies First, the organization comprised of female ministers’ and preachers’ wives. Maybe Tai…

  Carla dropped the girls off at the mall and told them she’d be back in a couple hours. She then drove down the street to a coffee shop, ordered a vanilla latte and some courage, and took out her cell phone. After a few pleasantries about their churches, children, and the SOS conference, Carla changed the subject.

  “Well, girl, I need to tell you the real reason I called. I’m dealing with something and need an ear to hear, if you know what I’m saying. I know you can keep a confidence so…” Carla took a deep breath and dove in. “Tai, I’m seeing somebody.”

  Tai remained silent as she digested what she’d heard. As soon as Carla had mentioned a “real reason for calling,” Tai had thought affair. She’d immediately assumed Stanley was the one cheating…but Carla?

  “I—I didn’t plan for it to happen,” Carla said into the silence. “I know it’s wrong….”

  “How long have you and Stanley been having problems?”

  “About ten years. No, that’s not fair; we’re not having problems, I’m having them.”

  Carla gave Tai a brief rundown of her decade-old marriage, making sure she gave Stanley the props he deserved. Carla also made sure Tai understood that she didn’t blame Stanley for her dissatisfaction in the marriage, that it was her issues, and her desires that were at fault.

  “What are you going to do?” Tai asked.

  “I don’t know. I know what I should do, what is the right thing to do. We tried to end it a while back but we couldn’t. Tai, it isn’t just sexual. I think I might be falling in love with this man.”

  “Who is he, a member of your church?”

  “No, thank God.” Carla dared not say more than that. It was already hard enough not to mention Tai’s church member’s name.

  “Well, Carla, I can’t say your situation is one in which I can directly relate. Unfortunately, my experience is on the other side. I may have looked here or there, but King has been the only man for me since I was fifteen.

  “I guess at the end of the day, the answer to your dilemma is in the question. Is what you want worth more than what you have?”

  It was an excellent question. Carla had a lot: good man, nice home, wonderful family, and thriving ministry. The only thing missing from the picture perfect life was the part Lavon had helped her uncover. She had everything anyone would ever want in life, except herself.

  21

  Mira

  “How is she, Doctor?”

  “Better, she’s doing better. But she still has quite a journey ahead of her. The burns are healing nicely and the swelling from all the surgery is going down. This one’s a trooper, I’ll give her that. Not many would have survived such a horrific car accident, one that required being pried from a flipped-over car by the jaws of life.”

  The nurse, Beth, walked around to the other side of the bed and changed the patient’s IV. It wasn’t protocol, but she’d become personally vested in this patient’s success. It was such an unusual story—a veritable Jane Doe with no identity, no family, no friends. The hospital staff had named her Mira, short for miracle, because that’s what she was. The patient cheated death with every heartbeat, defied the odds with every breath.

  “Did you hear that, Mira?” the nurse asked. “You’re doing better.”

  The patient, who had been partially comatose during her stay, stirred slightly. Her eyes moved but did not open.

  The nurse smiled. Mira had heard.

  22

  First Instincts

  Vivian lay on her poolside chaise, relishing some quiet time alone. The Montgomery clan’s schedule had been jam-packed since summer. Vivian looked forward to the holidays when both their family and the ministry adopted a decidedly light schedule.

  Checking her watch, she saw there was another hour before her daughter, Elisia, came home from school. Derrick Jr. would be at least two hours. Their father was out of town and Vivian had no appointments. She was footloose and fancy free and although there was a myriad of things on her to-do list, doing absolutely nothing felt like the best possible choice.

  The Montgomery backyard landscape provided a beautiful and quiet retreat. Tricolored bird-of-paradise mixed with pink camellias, blush red peonies, lavender crocus, and blue Japanese anemones to provide a symphony of color, nicely contrasted against the lush green grass. Along with the state-of-the-art barbeque grill, pool, and hot tub, a luscious waterfall from the mouth of a majestic lion head added to the aquatic tranquility. Vivian viewed the layout through partially closed eyes, her racing mind staving off the nap she desired.

  She’d just turned on her side for a more comfortable sleeping position when the phone rang. It was her best friend, Tai.

  “Hey, girl,” she said with a smile in her voice.

  “Hey, back,” Tai responded. “What’s shakin’, bacon?”

  “Would you believe nothing? And that I’d have it no other way?”

  “No, I can’t see you doing nothing. But life’s been crazy, huh, girl?”

  “That’s an understatement.”

  Tai and Vivian usually talked at least once a week, but the women hadn’t shared an in-depth conversation since right after Derrick’s uncle died. That’s where Tai decided to start. “How’s Derrick doing?”

  “He’s okay. One day at a time,”
Vivian answered, sitting up and sliding into her sandals. She headed inside for a glass of sparkling water. “At least, he acts like he’s doing okay, though honestly, I’m not sure if he’s really processed it yet. His schedule has kept him busy and right now, that might be a blessing.”

  “King and I are praying for you guys. How are you holding up?”

  “You know I loved Uncle Charlie,” Vivian said. “We didn’t get to see him much these past couple years; that too is a burden on Derrick. Thank God we got there in time to say good-bye. Now I’m choosing to remember the good times, to celebrate his life. His home-going celebration was standing room only.” Vivian shared some of the details of the three-hour long tribute given to Derrick’s father’s brother. “We’ve all got to go,” she concluded. “Let’s hope all of our lives can be celebrated the way his was.”

  “Speaking of life,” Vivian segued, “thanks for talking up somebody who’s better left forgotten.”

  “Who?”

  “Robin Cook.”

  “Girl, stop! You saw her?”

  “It’s old news now, happened more than a month ago. Uncle Charlie’s passing made me forget about it.” Vivian filled Tai in on Robin’s attempt to get into the church, and how their head security man, Greg, found a gun in Robin’s purse after denying her entry.

  “A gun?” Tai repeated incredulously. “I don’t like this, Viv. Sounds like that woman has serious mental problems. I’ve felt funny ever since I heard she’d been in jail.”

  “Crazy what a small world it is, that one of your members would know Robin.”

  “They knew her mother actually, but yeah, we’ve got probably a couple dozen members with Georgia roots. But things happen for a reason. I don’t have to tell you to take care of yourself.”

  Vivian agreed. “Fortunately, I’ve got help with that. Greg has put the security force on high alert. We even put a picture of her in the foyer’s bulletin area asking anyone who sees her to contact security immediately.”