Her eyes blinked slowly and her smile was lazy from the wine. Her hands slipped around his middle and she gazed up at him, her dark eyes reflecting the gold of the lantern light and making him feel like they were in a dream. The kind of dream he never wanted to wake up from.
“When you look at me like that, you make me feel like a king.”
She answered by softly kissing his lips, then resting her cheek on his chest.
Sway wasn't sure how long they stood there. A song began to play in Sway's head and he hummed along, taking their bodies on a small circle of a dance. Soon he added the words, rubbing his hands up and down her back under the suit coat.
Pearl Jam's “Just Breathe.”
He didn't really know why that song was the one that had decided to end up so loud in his head. Sure, he was a Pearl Jam fan. Who wasn't? But for some reason this song needed to be sung right then and to this woman.
They stood together for a few more minutes before he took her hand and led her back to the car. The drive back to her house was absent of words, but full of so much more. He kept their fingers laced together the entire time, stroking the inside of her palm with his thumb.
As they slowly ascended the steps of her front porch, he took her hand and kissed the back of it. Coming to a stop at her door, she turned to face him.
“Thank you for the best first date I've ever had,” she said, something deeper hiding in her dark eyes.
He curved a hand around her neck and felt her pulse against his palm. These simple actions he took to verify her as his reality, kept him sane. Because sometimes she seemed too perfect to be real.
“I'm going to kiss you goodnight now,” he said, his voice rougher than he anticipated.
“I sure hope so,” she breathed.
He was lost in her eyes. In her smile. In her life. As his lips made contact and he felt hers return the pressure, he let go of her hand and wrapped his arm at a slant behind her back, drawing her body close and molding her petite frame to his.
Her mouth opened under his and his tongue slid inside, savoring her sweet taste. Honey and wine. Never had he experienced such an intoxicating combination. Sway had kissed a lot of women, more than he could count. But every kiss with Ryan made him feel like a novice. She destroyed every confidence he had in himself and his skills.
Her soft body was malleable gold in his hands. He couldn't stop touching her. The dress she'd been wearing all night had showcased her perfect curves in a way that had made him want to throw a blanket over her and stand her in a spotlight at the same time.
He was dizzy with want. Drunk on his desire of her. Every molecule in his body was telling him that the home they'd been searching for their entire existence was right there—wrapped up and around this little blonde hurricane.
He was an electric current, and she was his safe conductor.
“Do you have your keys?” he asked, breaking the heady kiss and finding that he'd backed her against her front door.
“Yeah,” she breathed roughly, the sound making his body hum.
He had to say goodnight. He had to get her inside her house and a door in between them.
She turned her back to slide the key into the lock and he moved her hair out of the way, pulled the suit jacket off of one shoulder and nipped at it, following that with a soothing kiss. Her body melted backwards against him, the key forgotten as her voice betrayed her arousal. “Sway...”
His hands slid around her waist as he tasted her shoulder, her neck, her earlobe. She sucked in a breath and turned in his arms, her mouth seeking his, her hands tangling in his hair.
He reached behind her and pushed the door open, taking her a step backward until they were in her house. This was where it had to end. She'd had a lot of wine and the first time they were together, they were going to be sober and not lost in the moment.
And definitely not on a first date.
“I have to go,” he said in her ear, kissing the shell and reveling the way her hands were unafraid to explore the surface of his body.
She didn't argue vocally, but her body pressed against his in protest of his leaving. He held her face with both hands and gave her a deep, wet kiss. “Stop trying to take advantage of me, I don't put out on the first date,” he murmured against her lips.
A soft laugh bubbled out of her and he felt her mouth smile against his. He held her until their breathing had normalized. She rested her cheek against his chest and let out a contented sigh.
“Best first date ever.”
Sway smiled into the dark of the house. He couldn't agree more.
Chapter 26
I Was Made For Loving You
Ryan looked down at her hand laced together with Sway's as he drove deeper into the countryside. It was Friday, late afternoon, and the sun was doing its nightly dance between the foliage before calling it a day. It created a glittered overlay to the car's interior.
Sway's jaw line was impressive and should really be used to name mountain ranges, she decided as she gazed at him adoringly. She hadn't made the past few days very easy on him, but he wasn't holding it against her.
She'd wasted too much time and had hit a hard deadline. Which meant she'd locked herself in her house for five days in a row, only taking breaks for more coffee and to let Clive out. She'd barely slept. Definitely hadn't showered.
But she did it. She hit her deadline.
Just in time too, because now they were headed to spend the weekend at his grandparents. She should have been nervous, maybe a part of her was, but after this week, no way.
Deadline week was when she became a shitty friend. She didn't answer texts or her phone. She avoided interacting with people at all because she was cross and distracted. Normal people didn't understand. They had a tendency to take her lunacy personally. She was a little worried that Sway might not understand.
But he did.
Or, at least, he acted like he did. He didn't bother her. He sent her funny memes at random times of the day, sometimes the middle of the night. He brought coffee to the house every morning and took Clive on walks. And Ryan was fairly certain she heard him washing her dishes at some point.
Now they had the whole weekend and she could focus on him completely.
“You never told me why you cut your hair,” she pointed out as she was lamenting his lack of a wild mane. The muscle in his cheek jumped.
“My parents are going to be there this weekend,” he said with a sigh. “They've never really liked the long hair.”
Ryan squeezed his hand, wishing she could do more than that to soothe his worries. Selfishly, it hadn't even occurred to her that he might be nervous about this upcoming weekend. And she'd been so busy with her edits that she hadn't been able to be there for him to prepare.
Well, no matter. What was done was done. She was here now. And she knew, without a doubt, that she would do anything to protect him this weekend. Whatever that might look like.
“Well, I like you any way you come,” she said honestly.
He smiled faintly out the windshield. “I'm sure they'll find something wrong still. They've never liked anything that's mine.” He lifted her hand and kissed the back of it, then rested it, palm down on his thigh.
“Hey,” she said. He glanced in her direction. “I'm not even a little worried.”
Something shifted in his eyes, that thing he was always trying to tell her, but just couldn't. If it was what she thought it was, then he didn't have to say it.
She already knew.
***
Gran greeted them in the driveway like they were royalty returning to a long forgotten kingdom. She embraced Ryan with kisses on both cheeks and looked long into her face as tears rolled out of her eyes.
Sway tried to laugh off the dramatics, but Gran knew without it having to be told. Ryan was special. One of a kind. And Gran was eighty-five, so she was allowed to be dramatic.
They settled in separate bedrooms under Gran's instructions and Pops oversight. While they obviousl
y approved of Ryan, they were still who they were. So rules and propriety would be followed. Not that Sway and Ryan were even to that stage.
Sway had his own room, from when he was a child. Ryan's room was down the hall on the other side of Gran and Pops. Far enough away to discourage any late night interludes.
Ryan walked around Sway's bedroom as he put his clothes in the closet and unpacked his toiletries.
“And your Gran just let you hang rock and roll posters in her perfectly decorated farmhouse? Gran... I love that,” she finished under breath with a snicker.
Sway shot her a grin as he shoved his empty duffel into the bottom of the closet. “I'm pretty sure I was the favorite.”
Ryan lifted an eyebrow. “Makes sense. You're definitely my favorite.”
His chest felt the impact of those words like a solid blow to his chest. She'd said them before, or phrases similar to that, and it still surprised him every time. It wasn't just her lack of disapproval that had him turned on his head, it was her very vocal honesty that she approved of him at all. Didn't she know who she was? That her opinion was one of the most important in his life? Smart girls like her didn't fall in love with rock stars, especially the bass player.
And yet here they were.
She stopped moving around the room and clasped her hands in front of her. Happiness and peace radiated out of her like pure sunlight.
Sway reached for her hand. “C'mon, let's take a walk.”
“What about...” she asked, not sure how to finish her sentence, probably because she was simply arguing out of habit.
“It'll be fine. I just want to be with you for a few minutes.” He'd been looking forward to having her to himself this past week. So much so, that it was the only thought that had been keeping him from calling the whole thing off. He still would have gone to Gran's thing, but he would have ducked out when his folks arrived. Some reunions were just a waste of time.
But Ryan changed all of that. Her, by his side, made him proud of the person he was becoming. Because if he really was the failure they had thought he'd turn out to be, there's no way Ryan would be with him. He never felt like he needed to apologize for who he was before, but he had always been made to feel like he was supposed to.
And now there was Ryan.
She calmed him down. Brought peace to his insides without even trying. Just her laugh, her smile, her conversation. The way she talked to him like he mattered. Like he had something to say and she couldn't wait to hear it.
And he'd been without her all week, he needed a refill.
They left the house with the promise to be back before dark, and Sway held her hand like it was the lifeline it was. Their connection was strong. Impossibly so. He didn't want to think about how little time had passed since he first met her. In his head, he'd been getting to know her for almost a year as he read her books. The way her mind rearranged the words and delved into the delicate and complicated emotions of people he could swear he knew in really life... he was amazed by her.
They walked the fence line to the back pasture where Pops' few remaining horses were still out for the day. On the approach of people, one white mare broke away from the others to say hello.
“You said you were this close to being an Equine Veterinarian?” Sway asked, watching Ryan's face light up as the big horse approached.
“Yeah,” she breathed. She clicked with her tongue and the big animal came to her, pressing her muzzle into Ryan's outstretched hand.
Ryan was always beautiful, no matter what state she was in—be it on a four day editing binge with only raw walnuts and coffee in her system and a post-it stuck to her butt, or when she was pretending to ignore his double entendres as she balled a melon. But something magical happened when she was outside. It was like the sky opened up a little bit more and welcomed her home.
“I think she likes you,” Sway observed with a lopsided smile.
Ryan shot him a look that was pure sunshine as she softly rubbed the mare's face and forelock. “She's just a big love bug. Aren't you?” The horse responded with a grunt and Ryan giggled.
Sway had learned that Ryan's giggles were rare and usually involved something equally adorable. Like when he told an inappropriate joke or when she was with animals.
He took a deep breath, inhaling all of the good that was inherently Ryan, and exhaling all of the remaining anxiety with his parents impending visit. It didn't matter.
“Can I ask you a question?”
Ryan turned her face his direction. “Always.”
“Are you part Elf? Like Galadriel?”
Her deep laughter on the matter made the mare push against her shoulder and grunt. Ryan patted the horse's neck as her laughter subsided, but her smile stayed large. “Why in the world would you ask that?”
Sway's eyes trailed over all that was Ryan, wishing he could describe exactly what he saw. He shook his head in wonder. “Have you met you? I could swear you have the ability to calm any beast, tame any moment, light every day.”
Ryan's expression quieted, she stroked the mare's face one final time and made her way to where Sway was standing. Her delicate fingers ran down the side of his jaw as her dark eyes searched his face.
“Is that how you feel? Tamed?” she asked sincerely.
Sway tried to swallow. “I—”
“Because that's not what I want,” she said soberly.
“You make my head quiet down,” he confessed roughly.
Her mouth twitched and her face relaxed as she brushed his hair out of one of his eyes. “I really don't think anyone could tame you.” She paused, her eyes drifting to his mouth and then back up to his eyes. “I just want to run with you.”
Her words reached into his chest and wrapped around his soul. Maybe she was part Elf and he'd never truly know because he didn't care anymore. Now all he wanted was to know that when he ran, she would run with him. More than a partner, more than friend—a companion.
“I'm afraid I've fallen in love with you,” he said earnestly. “I had wanted to keep it a secret, but you're making it impossible.”
He slipped his hands around her waist as water and wonder filled her eyes. “For the record,” she said right before he kissed her good and deep and long. “You're terrible at keeping secrets.”
Chapter 27
I'm Still Here
Sway gingerly peeled back the gauze covering his shoulder and newest tattoo. The skin was less irritated now and the colors stood out boldly.
He liked this one.
A lot.
He liked his other ones too, but this one was definitely his favorite. He could have just gotten the nautical compass as a basic design, but he'd had Zeke get really creative with it. It was surrounded by foliage and flowers. A bird rested at the top, posed in song, an anchor at the bottom, cracked and breaking free. The words, “Never Too Far” framed the lower half.
It was important because of all it represented. The explorer in him that couldn't be stopped. And no adventure was ever too far away. Neither was home.
Movement in the corner of the mirror caught his eye and he glanced up to see his father standing in the doorway of his bedroom. Sway stared at the man for at least a minute. He tugged his t-shirt back on over his head and turned around.
“I just stopped by to pick up the rest of my stuff.” Sway moved to the closet where he'd left a couple of boxes. He pulled them out and set them on the stripped bed.
He'd moved out last week. Deciding it was too stressful to try and come home between tours. It was weird how living with people could mean more silence than simply living alone.
The band was making enough money at this point that he had rented a pretty decent apartment it the city. He and Blake had moved his things in Carl's truck and the band's van. He didn't think anyone would be home today, which is why he'd stopped by to get the rest of his things.
He looked up from the boxes to find his father was no longer there.
Apparently he didn't want to discuss it e
ither.
***
“She's remarkable, baby,” Gran said coming up behind Sway and linking one arm through his and folding her hands together at his bicep.
It was Saturday, midday. They'd had breakfast, chores, walked the orchard, lunch, and now Ryan had her head back and she was laughing hard at something Pops had said as he was outfitting her to go for a ride with Sway.
Sway looked down at Gran and smiled. “She really is, isn't she.”
“I'm so glad you brought her. She's really giving your Pops a run for his money.”
Ryan laughed again at Pops and Sway saw the older man shake his head and look to the sky.
“Yeah, she does that,” Sway agreed. “It means a lot that you approve, Gran.”
Gran chuckled and patted his arm. “Couldn't have picked a better woman for you myself. If it's our blessing you're looking for, you have it.”
Sway hadn't really considered it, but that's exactly what he'd been hoping for.
Still, that was fast.
“You did just meet her, Gran. You sure you don't want to think about a little bit?”
Gran smacked his arm in admonishment. “I knew your Grandad for less than a day before I knew he was the one I wanted to marry. He was the one that it took a week to decide.”
Then it was Sway's turn to throw his head back and laugh.
***
Ryan slowed her mount, the white mare she had met the day before, and gazed out over the bluffs at the sunset.
“How do you stay away from this place?” she asked as Sway came to a stop beside her.
“Life gets busy.”
She heard the awe in his voice and turned her eyes his direction. He was lost in the beauty of the sunset as well.
“Ah, yes. The life of a rock star.”
“Musician,” he corrected with a smirk.
She grinned. So many surprises with Sway. She never knew what to expect and she was loving it. Every surprise was amazing and not as scary as she had originally feared. He was authentically charming, complicated, deep, inspiring, encouraging, and just plain beautiful.
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