Journeys - SF10

by Meagher, Susan X

  "I bet you're scared, too, Bren, but you won't let that stop you."

  She could hear him smiling through the phone as he said, "No, you're right, Ryan. I won't let that stop me."

  At 9:30 on Thursday night, two tired volleyball players relaxed on their respective beds. The dark-haired one was methodically shoveling spoonfuls of cereal into her mouth, with the other continually trying to add a little something to the bowl. "Let me put some more raisins in that," Jordan suggested.

  "Did Jamie offer to pay you by the calorie?" Ryan smirked, knowing her partner was behind this conspiracy.

  "No…although that's not a bad idea," Jordan mused.

  Ryan flicked an almond at her, laughing when her quick-reflexed friend caught it in her mouth. "Well, that's all I can get down," she said, setting the bowl on the table.

  "How about another banana?" Jordan asked. "You need the potassium."

  "Okay," Ryan sighed. "Toss me one." Jordan did so, and Ryan started turning her bed down as she ate. "I can't wait to sleep." As soon as she swallowed the last bite, she brushed her teeth and hopped in. Jordan was planning on going out with some of their teammates, but she wanted to make sure Ryan was fed and asleep before she did so.

  The dark woman got into the bed and tossed and turned a bit, trying to get comfortable. "It's hard to find a good spot without Jamie here," she mumbled, punching her pillow in frustration.

  Jordan got up and went into the bath, emerging with a bottle of moisture lotion. "Let me rub your back for a while," she suggested.

  "Did Jamie put you up to this too?" Ryan asked as she tugged off her T-shirt and lay face down on the bed.

  "Yeah…it was mentioned," Jordan admitted. "She said that the best way to relax you was…I believe the term she used was a skin massage, rather than muscle massage."

  "Yep. That's the ticket," Ryan agreed. "She just moves my skin around with her fingertips. Lots of lotion, please."

  "Have you always had a retinue of people tending to your every need, Boomer?" Jordan asked fondly as she squirted a cool trail of lotion down the center of Ryan's back.

  "I hate to admit it, but I really have," Ryan chuckled. "Being the youngest, and the only girl, and having a bunch of aunts who all had only sons really helped, I think. They all wanted to pamper a sweet little girl."

  "Well, I guess you'd do in a pinch, huh?" the blonde teased gently.

  Jordan was quiet for a while as she played with the smooth skin under her fingers and Ryan asked, "You didn't have that, did you?"

  "No," she said softly. "My brother got all the pampering. I was supposed to take care of both him and my mother. It was a little Cinderella-like, but it wasn't a step-family…I was blood-related to the jerks."

  "What about your dad?" Ryan asked, her voice growing soft as she started to relax under Jordan's gentle stroking.

  "He wasn't home much when I was little," she said. "He was just getting his career going and work took precedence. But when he was there, he generally made over me. As long as I was doing well at school and accomplishing something in one of my sports, he was very supportive."

  Ryan turned her head around to be able to look into Jordan's eyes. "Did you never feel loved just for being who you are?"

  The blonde head shook slowly, Jordan's fine hair skimming over her shoulders. "No. Never."

  Lying back down, Ryan reached back and patted Jordan's leg. "I love you for who you are, Jordan. I think you're just perfect."

  Jordan leaned over and kissed Ryan on the cheek. "I love you too, Boomer." She ruffled the dark hair affectionately and added, "You're the best friend I've ever had." She handed Ryan her T-shirt and ordered, "Now cover up so you don't catch cold, you tender little thing. And don't you dare try to get out of bed before eight a.m. Jamie's orders!"

  "Will do," Ryan agreed, shrugging into her shirt and collapsing heavily onto the mattress. "You be careful if you go out. And if you want to sleep with me you can, okay?"

  "Mmm…that wouldn't be a good idea, Boomer," Jordan chuckled. "My hands wind up in some pretty interesting places when I sleep these days. Besides, I haven't had a nightmare since our first road trip."

  "That's good to hear," Ryan murmured sleepily. "See you tomorrow, pal. Thanks for caring about me, Jordan."

  A fond smile covered the blonde's face, even though Ryan couldn't see it. "Night, Boomer."

  The next morning Ryan lay in bed, her hands laced together behind her head, trying to make herself remain right where she was. Jordan got up and stumbled into the bathroom, and when she came back she shot a sleepy-eyed glance at her roommate and said, "It's after eight, Boom, you can get up now if you want."

  "Nah," Ryan yawned. "I'm trying to get used to sleeping late. It's the only way I'm ever going to feel better."

  "Might help if you closed your eyes," the blonde mumbled as she curled up in her still-warm bed.

  Ryan didn't reply, recognizing that Jordan's comment was rhetorical. She rolled over onto her side and tried to sleep, but was largely unsuccessful. A few minutes later she heard Jordan flopping around and she turned to look at her. "You up?"

  "Yeah. I can't go back to sleep. You're starting to rub off on me."

  Ryan sighed and said, "Jamie can always put me to sleep."

  "Hey, I rubbed your back as instructed and helped you nod off last night," the blonde reminded her.

  "Yeah, but she can put me to sleep when I'm fully rested," Ryan asserted. "That takes talent."

  As Jordan rolled over to face her friend she saw the impish expression on her face. "I have a feeling I know what her technique is," she guessed. "I think you're gonna have to wait until you get home for that little demonstration."

  "Mmm…nobody could compare, Jordan. She's the only one for me."

  There was a short silence as Jordan pondered a question. "Is that really true, Ryan? Is Jamie really the best sex partner you've ever had?"

  Ryan gave the question its due consideration, as she always did. "Hmm…let me answer that two ways," she said thoughtfully. "Yes, we have the most fulfilling sex life that I could even imagine. No comparison. But I've been with people who were a lot more experienced and pushed me a little more than Jamie ever does, and that's fun on a different level."

  "Pushed you?" The blonde really didn't understand the reference.

  "Let's see…how do I explain this?" Ryan mused. "It's actually a little difficult to express this in words, since it's such a physical concept, but I'll try." She rolled onto her side and supported her head with one braced hand. "I've been with women who just played me like an instrument, Jordan. Women who had so much experience, and loved sex so much, that they dedicated themselves to it." She laughed gently as she said, "I'm generally pretty quiet in bed, but I've had women drive me so crazy that the neighbors were pounding on the walls to get us to shut up."

  "It's not like that with Jamie?" she asked curiously.

  Ryan smiled gently and colored just a little as she admitted, "Well, sometimes it is, but that's the exception, rather than the rule."

  With a furrowed brow, Jordan asked, "So, it doesn't bother you to not always have wild sex?"

  "No, not at all," Ryan insisted. "Those women were using my body to make me feel something…so they would feel something, too. But it never really worked," she said thoughtfully. "Oh, I felt plenty physically, but very little emotionally. It's like we had to fuck each other's brains out to feel connected." She paused reflectively as she said, "It's never like that with Jamie. I feel so much from the slightest touch, from the softest kiss. If she pushed me sexually the way these women did, it would probably kill me - I honestly don't want that kind of thing with her on a routine basis."

  "Hmm…I don't know if I really understand the difference, Ryan. It seems like you'd want the woman who was the absolute best in bed if you were going to be with her for the rest of your life."

  "I'm not expressing myself well," Ryan decided. "Jamie is the best in bed-by far. Making love is more than just the physical sensa
tions, Jordan. Jamie's like a volleyball player that can do it all-set, kill, pass, serve-and do it all very, very well. Now if you compared her to the world's best passer, she might come out a little short. Likewise the best server; but if you wanted one particular player to be on your team, you'd choose her every time, because she is the best overall. Does that make any sense?"

  "Yeah, I guess so," she agreed. "I just wonder about these things because of Mia."

  "What about her?"

  "I'm trying to figure out what's going on with us, you know, how I feel about her. I don't have anything to compare it to, and that confuses me a little." Jordan had rolled onto her back again, making it difficult for Ryan to see her face clearly.

  "I can't tell where you're going here, Jordan. What has you confused?"

  "It's a little hard for me to pin down, Ryan. I just wonder what it all means." She sat up and tossed her legs over the side of the bed, looking intently at Ryan as she said, "I don't really know where we're going, ya know?"

  "Well, you've only been seeing each other a short time, Jordan. That's not that odd."

  "Yeah. I guess you're right," she agreed. "I'm just not used to not knowing where I'm going. It feels weird."

  "I know the feeling," Ryan chuckled. "When I first realized I was falling for Jamie, I was more confused than I had been at any time in my life."

  Jordan hopped to her feet and loomed over Ryan, her eyes wide. "That's not what I'm referring to! I'm not falling in love! I just…I just…I was talking about sex!"

  Ryan blinked up at her, a puzzled look on her face. "Oh…sorry. It didn't feel like you were talking about sex. What about it?"

  "Uhm…well…Mia's the only woman I've ever been with…and I wanted to know…um…how to judge the sex we've been having. You know…is it really good, or just good because I've never had it?"

  Now Ryan sat up, and gazed up at her friend speculatively. "You want to know how to tell if the sex you're having is good?" The tilt of her head, and the tone of her voice combined to show she doubted that the question was sincere.

  "Uhm…yeah. How do you know if it's really good?"

  Ryan scratched her head and looked up again. "Isn't that like asking how you know if you've enjoyed a meal?"

  "No," Jordan said, sitting down cross-legged on the bed. "What if I've only had fast-food my whole life, and I go to a fabulous restaurant and have all sorts of dishes I've never had. I might want my more experienced dining companion to tell me if the escargot we just had was really good, or not. I'm trying to educate my palate here, Ryan."

  "Okay," the dark-haired woman agreed. "I guess I see your point. Tell me this…how do you feel when you make l…have sex with Mia?"

  Jordan laughed gently and smiled at her friend. "It's pretty awesome, Ryan, and I mean that in the true sense of the word. Sometimes I lie there and I'm actually in awe of the feelings."

  Ryan smiled back and assured her, "I've been in awe a few times myself. What else?"

  "Well, it's hard to explain, but she makes me feel really special, you know? Like she'd rather be with me than anyone else on earth. She makes me feel really attractive, too, and that hasn't happened to me very often."

  Ryan's mouth gaped open at that comment, but Jordan was staring at some distant point and didn't take in her startled expression. "She makes me feel aware of my body in ways I never have been before, if that makes sense. It's funny, but sometimes I feel like she's actually worshipping me." Her eyes moved to Ryan's, and she cocked her head slightly as she asked, "Do you know what I mean? She lavishes so much attention on my body that I feel like a goddess sometimes."

  Ryan nodded, having felt that way a time or two, also, but only with Jamie.

  "Like the other night…she spent a good fifteen minutes just kissing my hands." She looked down at her hands, which were lying palms-up on her knees. "They didn't even feel like my hands when she was doing that. I looked at them like they were really special, too-rather than just tools for beating the hell out of a volleyball." Ryan laughed at her joke, and Jordan looked at her carefully. "Does that sound like good sex?"

  "Does your heart start to beat wildly when she looks at you in a certain way-and you know she wants to touch you?"

  "God, yes!" Jordan cried, falling onto her back, her legs still crossed-knees pointing towards the ceiling. "Sometimes she gives me a look, and it's all that I can do to stay on my feet!"

  "Do you find yourself thinking of her when you really should be doing something else?"

  "Uhm…how about match point last night? It was really hot in the gym, and I lifted my arm to wipe my forehead. I smelled my own sweat, and it reminded me of some of the scents we throw off when we have sex, and I almost forgot what I was doing out there!"

  "Uh-huh," Ryan said, recalling seeing Jamie's face in a few glass beakers in chemistry lab. "Is being with her the highlight of your day?"

  "Yep. Being with her is better than beating Stanford."

  "When something happens, does it have more meaning once you share it with her?"

  Jordan thought for a second and said, "Yeah…it does. I felt great about beating Oregon last night, but it wasn't until I called her that it really sank in. It's like I could feel that she was proud of me for playing well, and then it meant more to me."

  Ryan nodded, having felt the same way while on her own phone call. "I feel qualified to render my expert opinion now, Jordan," she said solemnly.

  "Yeah?" the blonde woman asked, her head tilted in anticipation.

  "You are most definitely having great sex. I'd stake my reputation on it."

  Jordan nodded, smiling broadly. "That's what I thought," she said. "Thanks for listening, Ryan. You really are great to talk to."

  As she hopped to her feet to head for the shower, Ryan smirked at her departing form. Oooh, baby. Are you ever in deep!

  "Hey, Mia, it's Ryan. Is the love of my life at home?"

  "Yep. Now that we've covered that, let me talk to my sweetie, okay?"

  "Wait your turn," Ryan growled playfully. "I want to say goodnight and hit the sack. Then you and Jordan can stay up and giggle all night."

  "Oh, all right," she pouted, "here's Jamie." The phone was handed off amidst a muted rustle.

  Jamie's sleepy sounding voice said, "Hi, sweetheart. We were almost asleep."

  "We?" Ryan asked, eyebrows shooting up. "Are you sleeping together?"

  "Uh-huh," she said, a half-captured yawn escaping. "We were sitting in my room, listening to the game on the Internet and generally moaning about how we hated to have you two gone, and we decided to at least have a little companionship."

  "Hey, thanks!" Ryan could hear Mia's outraged squawk in the background.

  "You know I love you," Jamie soothed her friend. "I'm just not in love with you. Big difference, as I've discovered."

  "Well I should hope so," Ryan interjected. "Are you two trustworthy? I don't want a pair of 'Dear Jane' letters waiting for us when we return."

  "We've slept together many times before now, honey." She giggled a little as she recalled, "Of course, neither of us knew about the other's Sapphic tendencies at the time."

  "You know, Jordan says she doesn't want to sleep with me any longer because her hands don't behave. Maybe you'd better take some precautions with Mia," Ryan teased, winking at Jordan, who was having a good laugh over the suggestion. She thought for a moment and added, "I've got some handcuffs in my bag of tricks."

  "Hey, Mia, Ryan wants me to put handcuffs on you. Do you mind?"

  After a pause Jamie got back on the line and said, "She says she'll agree to a little bondage, but that she has to be the top. She claims that she and submission are incompatible."

  "I don't even have a rejoinder for that," Ryan chuckled. She lowered her voice slightly, and Jordan took the hint, going into the bath to get ready for bed. "I'm glad you have each other, honey. Just don't warm your hands like you do with me."

  "Hey, it's not my fault that I could melt chocolate on your breasts. You
're just a little space heater."

  "You know," Ryan said reflectively, "the thought of seeing you with another person now is abhorrent for me. But I have this image of the two of you when you were still in high school and clueless about your sexual flexibility. It's kinda hot to think of you innocently fooling around a little bit when you were on a sleep-over."

  "It never happened," Jamie insisted, her voice dropping as she added, "but I'll be happy to make up a little erotic story about that for your birthday."

  "Ooo…tempting," Ryan chuckled. "But I don't think you have to go to that much trouble to turn me on. Just hearing your voice does it-quite well, as a matter of fact."

  "Mmm…works for me too," she sighed. "You just hold that thought until tomorrow, Hot Stuff. I'll make steam come out of your ears."

  "I'm going to sleep right now, so I'll can start dreaming of you. I love you, Jamie."

  "I love you too, Ryan. Now put Jordan on so Mia will stop pinching me."

  Part Two

  As expected, Jamie was patiently waiting for Ryan when the plane landed just after noon on Saturday. The unexpected twist was the colorful bunch of helium balloons that she held in her hand. "Happy birthday, honey!" she called out the instant Ryan passed through the doors of the jet way.

  Ryan grinned broadly, good-naturedly accepting the delighted congratulations of her teammates, none but Jordan having known that this was her natal day. As Jamie hugged her, Ryan was patted on the back repeatedly, with a few of the other women ruffling her hair as they passed. Jordan hung back, waiting to greet Jamie. When the smaller blonde released Ryan, Jordan hugged her and kissed her cheek. "Mission accomplished, Jamie," she said. "She was fed every hour on the hour, and she got ten hours of sleep both nights. Actually, she slept on my shoulder all morning, too, so she should be good to go."

  "Excellent job, Jordan," Jamie smiled. "Coming to our house, by any chance?"

  "Hmm," she said, looking like she hadn't given the idea any real thought, "I guess I could swing by at some point."