A Christmas in Cornwall: A Regency Christmas Novella

by Gill, Tamara

  “Yes, so you’ve said before, although I don’t believe ‘friends’ drag others into such a reprehensible business.” A maid exited the dining room with a garland of holly, and slowed her steps as if to listen. William glared at the girl, and she soon shuffled off. “And what am I to you, May?” He leaned in close enough so only she could hear. “Just your bed mate to be used and discarded when you’ve had your fill? Is your love so fickle that you can love me one moment and not the next?”

  A blush rose on her cheeks. “Of course not.”

  “Then what?” He stepped back. It was clear whatever feelings she had disclosed to him were not as important to her as her loyalty to her thieving, smuggling ‘friends’. He ground his teeth, wanting to shake sense into her while all the time knowing it was no use. The suspicious, closed off woman he’d first met on the beach was back, and there would be no reasoning with her. “I wish you well in your endeavours toward a life of prayer. I hope your time in the convent is everything you’d hoped it would be.” Sarcasm laced his tone and yet still, she held his gaze with an immovable strength that no matter how many words he said would not shift.

  “I’m sure I’ll be very happy there.” She bobbed a curtsy before leaving him gaping after her at the bottom of the stairs.

  William had hoped his less than favourable reminder of her future in the convent may spark some wisdom into her. It had not. William strode out the front door and made his way toward the stable. A good hard ride in the chilly air was what he needed to clear his head. And maybe by tonight May would have thought over her nonsensical words and be ready to rescind her choice.

  He scoffed at his own idiocy knowing she would not. And never would.

  Chapter 8

  Two days later, May watched from her bedroom as William rowed the small wooden craft out to the large sailing ship where he would disappear from her life, perhaps forever.

  A severe ache tortured the area where her heart sat. What had she done? And yet, she knew exactly what she’d done. She’d pushed away the only man she’d ever loved or cared about. How could she have said yes one moment and then throw his offer away without a second thought. Well, she was certainly having second thoughts now, and yet, now it was too late.

  The little boat made the larger vessel safely, and she could just make out William as he climbed on deck. He would probably marry another at some time in his life while she would have endless days and nights without color or joviality.

  I’m a pigheaded fool.

  “Your carriage is here, Miss May.”

  She picked up her shawl and looked about her bedroom one last time. After William had stated at dinner two nights past he would be leaving earlier than planned, it seemed the right time for her to leave as well. Being home, a place where she’d fallen in love for the first time in her life, was just too hard to bear. And she could not face a Christmas here, pretending to be happy and merry while all the time sick with regret. Her choice had been simple in the end, and she had written to the mother superior and asked to come early and was granted her wish.

  “Thank you,” she said, following her maid out of the room.

  The house was deathly quiet. Her father and brother both stood at the front doors waiting to farewell her. Threaded holly ran down the staircase and the scent of pine and sea filled the house. From the look of the decorations scattered about the foyer, the house was almost ready for Christmas. A pang of guilt pricked her that she would not be here to celebrate the day with her family, but she pushed it away. This was for the best, it was time she started the new chapter in her life.

  Neither of them looked enthused by her choice to go, and she fought the prick of tears. Fear crept up her spine that she may have made a mistake. That the course she had chosen to walk was the wrong one. May sighed, thinking over her last night at home.

  As arranged she had met the smugglers and taken into her possession the last shipment of their contraband. She’d returned to the estate just before dawn to a waiting William. Never would she forget the disappointment or the hurt on his face. The imagery of it would haunt her forever.

  He’d not said a word, only strolled into the library, shutting the door in her face, and seemingly closing her out of his life forever.

  And she deserved it.

  May forced a smile as she came back to the present, and stood before her family. “Well, this is goodbye I suppose, but only for now. Matthew, promise me you’ll write and tell me all the news of home.”

  “Must you go?” her brother whined, taking her hand.

  “You know I must, but remember, we’ll keep in contact. And you can visit me whenever you wish.” His lip wobbled and May pulled him into a hug, the tears so steadfastly held back spilling onto her cheeks. “Don’t be upset.” She sniffed, kissing his crown. “This is for the best, dearest and in time you’ll understand.” Her father mumbled something and May caught his gaze. “What is it, Papa?”

  “Other than this being the second biggest mistake you’ve made in your short life, nothing. Nothing is the matter.” His voice was gruff, his annoyance almost palatable.

  May frowned. “What was my first mistake?”

  “William.”

  Just the mention of William’s name sent a longing that threatened to rip her heart from her chest. She missed him and it had only been an hour or so since she’d seen him leave. Not that he’d sought her out to say goodbye. The last two days, they’d been strangers who had no interest in making each other’s acquaintance.

  “But why can you not stay for Christmas. I don’t want you to go.”

  May kissed her brother and father quickly, unable to listen to anymore of her siblings pleas without breaking down entirely in front of them. “I must go. It’s starting to snow.”

  “Safe travels, my darling daughter. We will write often and visit when allowed.” Her father pulled Matthew against his side and waved from the door, disappointment etched on his visage.

  May stepped up into the carriage and looked back at them. “As will I. Goodbye.”

  Chapter 9

  Leaning into the wind at the bow of Stephen’s ship, May stared at the endless ocean before her. How she had come to be here made her laugh. Only last week had she commenced her postulancy at The Little Sisters of Jesus, praying, reflecting and giving thanks. And now, now she was free.

  Thank goodness, the mother superior didn’t know she prayed for a way to leave them, she would’ve gone to hell for sure. The woman for all her strict rules and beliefs had sensed her unhappiness and asked her to explain her moroseness.

  The moment May had sat down to explain, a dam of emotions had spilled out across the mother superior’s desk and threatened to drown the poor woman. Surprisingly, the woman had patiently listened and offered her further time to think about her future or to return to her father’s estate. May had done the latter and no sooner had she returned home, she had ridden down to the local village and sent out word to Stephen that she needed his assistance and as soon as possible.

  She had expected to see him within a month or two at the least, so when he was ushered into the parlour the following day, May knew fate had shown its hand and had confirmed her choice was the right one—William and she were meant to be together.

  And now Stephen was chasing down William’s ship having been told by another vessel where they were. It was probably not the most intelligent move her lifelong friend had ever made, since a smuggler’s ship was always trying to outrun the law, and William was exactly that—the law. But as her friend, and with her promise that William would not take them into custody, he’d agreed to her plan to take her to him. Now she just hoped that her promise could be kept.

  “A ship, starboard side, captain,” a sailor hollered.

  May looked to where the man pointed and could just make out the sails of a ship on the horizon. Orders rained about her and soon their ship was sailing toward the other vessel.

  Stephen came to stand beside her. “Are you sure about this, May? Y
our course in life seemed set.”

  She smiled. “I know it did and had I not met William, I would’ve continued to tolerate the life of prayer and service, but I did meet him and he’s changed everything for me. I love him.” She looked at the vessel getting ever closer and excitement along with trepidation thrummed in her veins. Would William acknowledge her? Would he accept her pleas for forgiveness and make her his forever? May did not know, but she supposed, she would soon find.

  “Then I’m glad you’re chasing what you want. You deserve to be happy.” He smiled and the gesture calmed her a little. Everything would work out well.

  “Thank you, Stephen. I hope one day you find love as well. For all your smuggling, you’re a good man.” And he was the best of men for helping her out in such a way.

  * * *

  It took them some hours to chase down the vessel. By now, William’s crew had noted their presence and all stood on deck waiting, watching to see what Stephen’s ship was doing.

  May stood next to Stephen and spied William before he noticed her. When he did, his eyes flared, but no other emotion crossed his features to give her some clue as to what he was thinking.

  He would be angry with her. That she could be sure, but she hoped in time he’d forgive her. Not that she could ever submit to rules from him, she wasn’t capable of submissive behaviour, but if he was willing to be her equal partner in life, that she could manage.

  “I’m surprised to see your ship and so close to mine. Are you here to hand yourself over to the Crown and right the wrongs you’re so guilty of?” William shouted out across the small stretch of water that separated them.

  Stephen laughed. “Sorry to disappoint you, Lord Grandison, but I’m only here to return what is yours.” He gestured toward her. “Miss May.”

  William’s gaze locked with hers and a simmering heat flared between them. “She is not mine.”

  May stepped forward and clasped the rail for support. “Can I come aboard and have a moment of your time, my lord?” The crew on both ships hollered and laughed at her request. May glared at each of them and their chortling stopped.

  “If you wish it,” he replied, crossing his arms, refusing to offer help in getting her across the short space of water separating them.

  Stephen came to her aid and clasped her hand, helping her climb down the ladder to the small boat that would take her to William’s ship. She whispered her thanks knowing Stephen would take his leave immediately, giving her the time alone with William.

  “Follow me,” William barked, the request like an order to one of his men.

  May started at his terse words that did little to comfort her. He was angry, but it had been some weeks since she’d seen him. May had hoped he would’ve missed her as much as she’d missed him and taken her into his arms and declared undying love before all his crew. Followed by hours of making love…

  That part of her daydream took place in the privacy of his cabin. But this greeting left her floundering and unsure of his mind-set. Pushing away her fear, she followed him, comforting herself with the thought that should everything go terribly wrong, no matter what William thought of her, he would not hurt her physically.

  He led her toward the stairs, taking her below deck. The ship rocked, making her progress awkward. He didn’t wait for her, but kept stalking toward his quarters and she followed, taking in as much of the ship as she could.

  William had the respect of his crew. For a vessel that was occupied by men, it was clean and shipshape. His quarters were no exception. A large four-poster bed stood hard up against a wall, centred in the large space. A desk with a multitude of charts and papers sat before large bank of windows that looked over the ocean.

  May walked toward the window and gazed out over the deep azure sea. With a view like this to wake up to every morning it was no wonder William had never sought to return to his estate with any haste. The door slammed shut and May heard the bolt slide home. She faced him. The muscle at his temple twitched and she wondered if perhaps this wasn’t such a well thought out plan after all. Her fingers shook and she clasped her hands before her to stop the nervous gesture from being obvious.

  Maybe he’d lied about his position for her. Maybe it was a ruse to get to her smuggling friends. She shook away the unhelpful thoughts and focused on her plan. She was being fancifully absurd.

  “What are you doing here, May? Aren’t you supposed to be praying like a good little nun?”

  His sarcasm stung. “Don’t be rude. The sisters at the convent are wonderful people. Just because you don’t understand their motives doesn’t make their choices any less valid than your own.”

  He scoffed and sat on the end of his bed. Warmth spread between her thighs at the memory of what they’d done in his bed back at her home. She cleared her throat, needing to think clearly. “We need to talk.”

  “Really?” His brows rose. “I believe you’ve already stated what you wished for and felt for me. There is nothing else left to say.”

  May went to take a step toward him and then thought better of it when he frowned. Determined not to lose him without making him at least hear her out, she said, “I was angry and upset. What I said I wish I was able to take back. I didn’t mean a word of it, I promise.”

  He scoffed. “Thank you for telling me, but it’s too late to change your mind. I’m not a man who can tolerate flighty nature in a woman. Nor one who’s obstinate to the point of placing herself in danger rather than heeding the advice of others.”

  She kneeled before him, clasping his hands. “I will never take orders and I’m sorry if that disappoints you, but it was how I was raised. As for the danger you speak of, my smuggling contacts have been my friends since childhood. If it’s escaped your notice,” she said, throwing him a beseeching look. “I grew up in Cornwall. There aren’t too many children about. We don’t have a lot of options if we wish to play and have fun.”

  “I never wanted you to take orders from me, May. I was merely concerned for you. I’ve met a lot of smugglers since working for the Crown and not all of them are as friendly as you seem to think yours are.”

  He raised his eyebrows and May sighed. “I should have been more open with you, I know that now and I apologize. And I will never ignore your regard when it comes to my safety again.” Regret threatened to keelhaul her. She should have trusted him when he asked her to. Should have trusted in their love more. “Do you think you can forgive me for being so stubborn a criminal even? Will you give me another chance?”

  William pushed her hands away, crossing his arms over his chest. “In two days we dock in London. From there I’ll arrange your passage back to Cornwall.” He stood and left the room. The bolt on the other side of the door slid home, locking her in and ending their conversation. May stared after him, unsure as to what had just happened. But she supposed, by such a reaction, his answer was no. She bit her trembling lip and looked out the windows, the view of the endless ocean going some way in calming her, but not a lot.

  * * *

  William grinned as he paced upon the deck of his ship. His steps light, his mind free from the plaguing worry that had hindered him these past few weeks apart from May—the longest time in his life.

  When he’d seen her standing on the deck of the smuggling ship, it had taken all of his strength not to snatch her into his arms and kiss her senseless. Or shoot the bastard who dared stand so close to her person. That he’d made her believe she was returning home was all part of his plan. It wouldn’t hurt for her to think all was lost for a little while. His strong-willed May deserved a little set down after her escapades. He laughed and took over the steering of the ship, the pull of the waves and salty cooling wind making the blood in his veins pump to life once more.

  Their time apart had seemed endless. Days and nights of continuous torture wondering what she was doing. If she were happy or sad. Regretful even… And now, she was here, with nowhere to go unless he took her. How he loved her and from this day forward, all his
adventures would be May’s as well. Life was looking promising indeed.

  The hours at the helm passed quickly and he sent word to the cook to lock his quarters door after leaving May her nightly meal. For what he had planned with his future wife, he didn’t wish for her to escape.

  After making his way down to his room, he stood outside the door for a moment listening to the pacing inside. The mumbling and clanging of items confirmed what he’d hoped. May was angry with him. Good. Although the moment he’d seen her, he’d forgiven the little minx.

  He opened the door and the sight of her now only wearing a silk chemise ceased all oxygen into his lungs. Once he’d closed the door behind him, he snipped the bolt and leaned against the wood. “Trying to seduce me now, darling?” William threw his jacket over his desk chair and took his fill of her.

  She threw him a mischievous look. “I didn’t think it would hurt.”

  She stared at him with a longing that almost undid his resolve to tease her for a little longer. He ran a finger down her bare arm, her skin exquisitely soft, just begging for his worship. And he would worship her for the rest of his life. “You were never a woman without a plan.”

  “You have not forgiven me and nor do you want me. I will try anything at this point to win you back.”

  The dejected tone to her voice pierced his heart and the fight left him. They’d both suffered enough. “The moment I saw you today, I forgave you. And in all the weeks we’ve been parted from one another, you were all I’ve thought about.” William slipped free the delicate ribbon at the bust of her attire. “And I want you.” He clasped her hand, lifting it up for a kiss. “I’ve missed you.”

  “And I you.” She leaned up and kissed him, her touch tentative as if still unsure of his feelings. He deepened the embrace, pulling her hard against his chest and taking the kiss to exquisite heights that left them both breathless.