Pornified: How Pornography Is Transforming Our Lives, Our Relationships, and Our Families

by Pamela Paul

  48. Gail Gibson, “Jury Finds Man Guilty in Teen-Sex Sting Case,” Baltimore Sun, March 24, 2004.

  49. Peter Franceschina, “Ex-Youth Leader Receives 17½ Years for Child Porn,” Sun-Sentinel (Fort Lauderdale), January 22, 2004.

  50. Associated Press, “Former Christian Radio Employee Pleads Guilty in Child Porn Case,” February 13, 2004.

  51. Sheridan Lyons, “Halethorpe Man Charged in Child Pornography Case,” Baltimore Sun, February 14, 2004.

  52. Nicole Martin, “BT Blocks 20,000 Attempts a Day to Access Child Porn,” Daily Telegraph (London), July 21, 2004.

  53. Marc Hansen, “Imprisoned by the Internet,” Des Moines Register, January 16, 2005.

  54. Jonathan Athens, “Teen Admits to Downloading Child Porn,” Newark (Ohio) Advocate, January 30, 2004.

  55. Patrick Goodenough, “Online Porn Driving Sexually Aggressive Children,” CNS News Web site, November 25, 2003.

  56. Richard Oakley and Jan Battles, “Cork to Research Teen Porn Addicts,” Sunday Times (London), January 25, 2004.

  57. Martha Linden, “Parents Unaware of Children’s Online Activities,” Press Association News, July 21, 2004.

  58. PRNewswire.com, “Global Campaign Against Child Pornography Is Launched.”

  59. Pornified/Harris poll.

  60. Associated Press, “Couple Sues Blockbuster After Child Views Pornographic Images on Video,” January 24, 2004.

  61. T. M. Shultz, “Porn Replaces Youth Football Web Site,” Lansing (Mich.) State Journal, July 26, 2004.

  62. Pollet and Hurwitz, “Strip Till You Drop.”

  63. Editorial, “Chipping Away at Web Porn,” Los Angeles Times, July 1, 2004.

  7. Fantasy and Reality: Pornography Compulsion

  1. Christopher S. Stewart, “God Loves Us All, Even You Sex Freaks,” GQ, June 2004, p. 98.

  2. Al Cooper, “In-Depth Study Outlines Reasons Men and Women Engage in Online Sexual Activities” (San Jose, Calif.: San Jose Marital and Sexuality Centre, n.d.).

  3. www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/pornoff.html.

  4. David Mura, “A Male Grief: Notes on Pornography and Addiction,” in Men Confront Pornography, ed. Michael S. Kimmel (New York: Crown Publishers, 1990), p. 125.

  5. D. Zillmann, “Pornografie,” in Lehrbuch der Medienpsychologie, ed. R. Mangold, P. Vorderer, and G. Bente (Göttingen, Germany: Hogrefe Verlag, 2004), pp. 565–85.

  6. Victor B. Cline, “Pornography’s Effects on Adults and Children” (New York: Morality in Media, n.d.).

  7. Jennifer Schneider, “Effects of Cybersex Addiction on the Family,” Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity 7 (2000): 31–58.

  8. The Truth about Pornography

  1. www.extremeasssociates.com.

  2. Anne Kingston, “Porn of Another Kind: To Sexually Humiliate Someone Is to Destroy His Sense of Self,” National Post (Ontario), May 11, 2004.

  3. Dan Savage, interviewed on CNN, Paula Zahn Now, transcript, March 4, 2004.

  4. Amy Dickinson, “Porn Viewing Draws Responses from Readers,” Chicago Tribune, February 6, 2004.

  5. D. Zillmann, “Pornografie,” in Lehrbuch der Medienpsychologie, ed. R. Mangold, P. Vorderer, and G. Bente (Göttingen, Germany: Hogrefe Verlag, 2004), pp. 565–85.

  6. Christopher D. Hunter, “The Dangers of Pornography? A Review of the Effects Literature” (Ph.D. diss., Annenberg School for Communication, University of Pennsylvania Press, March 2000).

  7. T. L. Stanley, “The Porno-ization of American Media and Marketing,” AdAge.com, January 26, 2004.

  8. Justin Vann, “Ashcroft Heading Anti-Porn Thrust,” UniversityWire.com, April 14, 2004.

  9. Stanley, “The Porno-ization of American Media and Marketing.”

  10. “Porn in the U.S.A.,” CBSNews.com, September 5, 2004.

  11. David Bowman, “Citizen Flynt,” Salon.com, July 8, 2004.

  12. Robert Yager, “The Trouble with Larry,” The Independent (London), February 22, 2004.

  13. Ibid.

  14. David G. Savage, “Court Rejects Law Blocking Internet Porn,” Los Angeles Times, June 30, 2004.

  15. Wirthlin Worldwide March 2004 national telephone poll. Question was phrased:

  Since 1995, the World Wide Web has expanded rapidly and is now estimated to contain as many as 40 million Web sites. A large number of these Internet Web sites contain hardcore pornography. The Supreme Court has said that those who distribute hardcore pornography can be prosecuted under obscenity laws. In 1996, Congress expanded federal obscenity laws, making it a crime to distribute obscene materials on the Internet. In your opinion should the federal laws against Internet obscenity be vigorously enforced?

  16. General Social Survey of the National Opinion Research Center, 2000 and 2002.

  17. Warren Richey, “Court Hears Case on Regulating the Web,” Christian Science Monitor, March 2, 2004.

  18. Andy Bull, “After the Fall,” The Times Magazine (London), July 17, 2004, p. 39.

  19. Anderson Cooper, 360 Degrees, CNN, April 13, 2004.

  20. Michael S. Kimmel, Men Confront Pornography (New York: Crown Publishers, 1990), p. 13. Author’s emphasis.

  Conclusion: The Censure-Not-Censor Solution

  1. Dennis McAlpine, interview, “Porn America,” Frontline, PBS, August 2001.

  2. Jonathan A. Knee, “Is That Really Legal?” New York Times, May 2, 2004.

  3. Jonathan Prynn, “Vodafone Restricts Sex Sites,” Evening Standard (London), July 2, 2004.

  4. Virginia Vitzthum, “Stripped of Our Senses,” Elle, December 2003, p. 188.

  5. Carina Chocano, “Scholars of Smut,” Salon.com, October 5, 1998.

  6. Neva Chonin, “Pretty in Porn: Alterna-Porn Is Challenging the Playboy Body Ideal,” San Francisco Chronicle, July 25, 2004.

  7. In the Zillmann-Bryant experiments, subjects were asked to evaluate a pornographic film following their six weeks of exposure (or nonexposure in the case of the control group) to pornographic movies. Among the high-exposure group, only 26 percent found the selected film to be offensive, compared with 75 percent of those who had not seen any pornographic films during the six-week period. Similarly, only 29 percent of those in the high-exposure group found the films to be pornographic while 70 percent of those in the control group considered the film pornographic.

  8. Dolf Zillmann and Jennings Bryant, “Pornography, Sexual Callousness, and the Trivialization of Rape,” Journal of Communication 32 (August 1982): 10–21.

  Acknowledgments

  First and foremost, I am indebted to all those men and women who agreed to spend hours talking to me for my interviews. For many, this was a private and sensitive topic, yet everyone was forthcoming and honest in ways I hardly could have imagined. Many thanks to all those anonymous individuals who gave so generously of their own free time.

  I also would like to thank the sociologists, attorneys, psychologists, and other academics and professionals who answered my questions and allowed me to observe them at work. In particular, thanks to Robert Jensen, Bryant Jennings, Gary Brooks, Mark Schwartz, Aline Zoldbrod, Judith Coché, Michael Kimmel, and David Marcus.

  Harris Interactive was a tremendous help to me. Thanks to Ria Ignacio, Robyn Bald, Nancy Wong, and, most especially, Humphrey Taylor at Harris. Humphrey, you said yes when you could have very easily said no. This book would not have been the same without your open-mindedness, willingness, and generosity. I cannot thank you enough.

  This story began as an article for Time magazine, a publication any writer would dream of writing for, and to which this writer in particular is enormously grateful. This book would not have existed without “The Porn Factor” as impetus. I want to thank Steve Koepp, Priscilla Painton, and Jan Simpson for encouraging me to write for Time. I especially would like to thank Claudia Wallis—without hyperbole, the ideal editor and a valuable mentor.

  Many friends, fellow writers, and editors helped me both personally and practically with this book. Thanks to Alysia Abbott, Hilary Black, Victoria Cam
elio, Rachael Combe, Holly Gordon, Rachel Lehmann-Haupt, Ariel Levy, Mindy Lewis, Vanessa Mobley, Annie Murphy Paul, Pauline O’Connor, and Ericka Tullis for providing insight, assistance, and support. I would also like to thank Annie Paul and Alissa Quart as well as fellow members Stacy Sullivan, Heidi Postlewait, Sherri Fink, Susan Burton, Debbie Siegel, Paul Raeburn, Elizabeth DaVita-Raeburn, Rebecca Segall, Christine Kenneally, Abby Ellin, and Katie Orenstein, for our incredible authors’ group.

  Perhaps the smartest decision I made with this book was to publish with Times Books. Everyone there—Paul Golob, Christine Ball, Denise Cronin, Heather Florence, Chris O’Connell, Eva Diaz, Richard Rhorer, Maggie Richards, and especially my editor Robin Dennis—has been accommodating, generous and very, very smart about how this book should be handled. And of course, many thanks to the brilliant Lydia Wills, who led me there. I’m absolutely convinced I have the best agent there is.

  Finally, I would like to thank those closest to me, my family—Mom, Dad, Carol, Roger, Brian and Suzanne, Nick, Erik and Debbie, and Kirsten—and the memory of my beloved late aunt Madelyn. Many thanks to my new family—Debra and David, Emily and Jeremy, Jessica and Sina. And to my own family, for now and forever, Michael and Beatrice. Michael, you know this book literally could not have been written without you. As I said on a certain special day in July, words cannot suffice. I’m just so glad you and Bee have been right here to keep me company along the way.

  Index

  abstinence-only education, 189

  Abu Ghraib, 8, 240

  ACLU, 206, 251, 253

  Adam & Eve Web site, 122

  addiction to pornography, 46–47, 70–71, 76, 96, 211–39

  children and teens and, 180–81, 198–99

  as cyberaddiction syndrome, 60

  dealing with, 200

  deception of family about, 233–36

  desensitization and, 225–29

  difficulty relating to real women caused by, 221–25, 230–33

  harmfulness of, for men, 267

  Internet and increase in, 213–18

  questionnaire to evaluate, 213–14

  recovery from, 199–200, 236–39

  rush and, 218–20

  self-esteem problems as cause of, 223–25

  taking habits to real world, 226

  12-step programs, 199–201

  types of men susceptible to, 217–18

  adrenaline, 216

  adult film industry, 5, 22, 54, 64

  adult video industry, 54

  Adult Video News, 6, 54, 87, 184

  advertising, 79

  Aguilera, Christina, 4, 5, 109, 184

  Alba, Jessica, 23

  American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 166–67

  anal sex, 78, 86, 160, 161, 188

  Analyze That (film), 7

  Anderson, Pamela, 59, 109, 184

  anime, 26

  anonymity, 255

  anti-porn feminists, 109, 127, 270, 272–74

  anti-porn forces, 4

  anti-porn women, 124–27, 258–59

  art, 241

  ARUSH Entertainment, 185

  Ashcroft, John, 246, 251, 257

  “at risk” users, 215–16

  AT&T Broadband, 55, 64

  Australia, 264

  automobiles, 62–63

  Average Girls genre, 76–77

  Baldegg, Katherina C., 114

  Banks, Brianna, 94, 185

  Barbach, Lonnie, 157

  Barely Legal, 64

  Barron, Michael, 36

  Barry, Richard, 167

  BearShare, 190

  Beaver Hunt, 64

  Be Broken Ministries, 20

  Beeson, Ann, 251

  Behind the Green Door (film), 51

  bestiality, 78, 178, 226, 227, 228

  Big Champagne, 60

  birth control education, 258

  Bit Torrent, 59

  Black Entertainment Television, 6

  Blink 182, 5

  Bliss TV, 111

  BMX XXX (video games), 185

  body image, of women, 2–3, 158, 188

  Boink magazine, 114

  Bon Jovi, 5

  Booble.com, 60

  Boogie Nights (film), 7, 266, 270

  boredom, 83–85, 91, 224

  boys, 16–17, 180–82

  access to adult Web sites, 240

  conditioned to be visual, 242

  first encounters with porn, 174

  negative effects on, 187–88, 199

  Boy Scouts, 17

  brain, male vs. female, 118–19

  Bravo (cable network), 6

  breast implants, 159–60, 184, 230

  Bridges, Jeff, 7

  Britain, 264

  British Telecom, 196

  broadband, 59, 228

  Brokester, 59

  Brooks, Gary, 80, 95, 186–87, 242

  Brown, Randy, 196–97

  Bryant, Jennings, 73, 77–78, 80, 89–90, 141, 226, 245

  bukkake, 61, 86

  Bull, Andy, 254–55

  Bundy, Ted, 257

  Burt, David, 175–76

  Burton Snowboards, 185

  Bush, George W., 189

  Butts, Seymour, 118, 136

  cable TV, 6, 18, 64, 68, 245

  à la carte subscriptions, 207

  children and, 187

  obscenity laws and, 264

  porn profits and, 54–56

  CAKE, 112, 270

  California Supreme Court, 192

  Caligula (film), 22

  Campbell, Robin, 174

  Can You Be a Porn Star? (TV show), 6

  Carey, Mary, 6, 69

  Carl’s Jr fast-food chain, 7

  Carroll, E. Jean, 170

  Cathouse (cable TV series), 6

  cell phones, 63, 264

  censorship, 56, 255, 256

  Center for Online Addiction, 213

  Cerberian, 29

  Chambers, George Paul, 195

  Chantrel, Cobe, 247

  chat rooms, 179

  cheating

  lap dance as, 139

  online sexual activity as, 163–65

  porn as, 236, 246

  porn as alternative to, 27–28, 57

  Cherry, Donald Eric, 177

  Chicago Sun-Times, 123

  Chicago Tribune, 242

  child molestation, 187, 192, 200, 201, 238

  child pornography, 59, 177, 190–201, 254, 255

  escalation to, 226–27

  first encounters with, 196–98

  who uses, 193–98

  Child Pornography Prevention Act (1996), 191

  children, 172–211. See also

  boys

  girls addiction to porn in, 180–81, 211–12

  effect of porn on, 89, 93, 185–90, 198–99, 203–4, 262

  fathers and, 168

  first encounter with porn and, 173–78

  Internet and, 60, 174–77, 180–81, 203–4, 208–10

  need to protect, 202–5

  online solicitations of, 202

  parent’s porn addiction and, 229, 237–38

  porn use by, 51, 56–57

  regulation and, 205–10, 261

  talking to, about porn, 208–9

  Children Online Protection Act (COPA, 1998), 206–7, 251

  Christianity Today/Leadership survey, 20

  civil liberties, 4, 87, 238, 244, 249, 258. See also First Amendment

  Cline, Victor B., 217, 227

  CNN (cable TV network), 54

  Coché, Judith, 146, 180

  Cole, Susan B., 113

  college campuses, 114–16, 125–26, 181–82

  Columbia House, 54

  Comcast, 54–55

  Communications Decency Act (1997), 206

  community standards, 252

  competition, 37, 159–61

  Computer Addiction Center (McLean Hospital), 60

  comScore, 15, 116

  Concerned Women of America, 258

  Connelly,
Tom, 184

  conservatives, 246, 257–59, 261

  Cool Sex (e-mail service), 117, 129

  Cooper, Al, 208, 213, 215–16

  CosmoGirl!, 4

  Cosmopolitan, 110

  couples counseling, 144–45, 154–55, 161

  couples porn, 122–23, 142–45

  Couric, Katie, 142–43

  Cowan, Gloria, 174

  Cowan-Campbell study, 186

  “cum shots,” 14, 95

  Cuthbert, Elisha, 7, 110

  Cybersex Exposed, 60

  cybersex sociology, 60

  CyberSmuggling Center (U.S. Customs Department), 175

  CyberTipline, 190

  Dahmer, Jeffrey, 257

  dating, porn as substitute for, 25, 34, 42, 228

  Daugherty, Jonathan, 20

  Davis, Cynthia, 35–36

  Deep Throat, 7

  degradation, 88, 123

  of men, 267–68

  of women, 145, 161, 233, 248, 271–72

  dehumanization, 240

  Delia’s, 184

  demand, need to control, 265–66

  Democrats, 249, 252

  Denby, David, 217

  desensitization, 88–92, 227–29

  desperation, 223–25

  Detroit Rock City (film), 7

  Deyo, David, 195

  Digital Playground, 111

  Disney World, 8

  dissatisfaction, 91, 227–29

  distribution regulation, 264

  divorce, 166–68, 233

  dominance, 86–87, 121. See also sadomasochism

  Do Not Call registry, 253

  Downes, Sue, 202

  drugs, 220

  DVDs, 8, 54, 62–63, 181

  Dworkin, Andrea, 258

  Eagle Forum, 258

  eating disorders, 158

  EchoStar, 54

  ejaculation

  delayed, 75, 95, 97–98

  on faces of women, 161

  focus on, 179

  outside of body, 232

  Electra, Carmen, 109

  Elle, 67, 110, 125, 169–70

  Elle-MSNBC.com poll, 15, 82, 87, 91, 106, 116, 117, 125, 136, 147, 153, 155, 160, 166, 216

  e-mail, 4, 30, 207

  Eminem, 5

  Emmanuelle (film), 74

  emotions

  as component of porn, 223–25, 269

  distant, caused by porn, 155–56, 224

  lack of, in porn, 41, 61–62

  Emotions of Jenna Jameson (DVD), 28

  Employment Law Alliance survey, 29–30

  entrapment porn, 184

  erectile dysfunction, 42, 70, 82, 98, 103, 158, 159

  erotica

  couples and, 145