by Unknown
“Am I invited?” asked the Great Sage, laughing. “We haven’t heard your name mentioned,” said the Immortal Maidens. “I am the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven,” said the Great Sage. “Why shouldn’t I, old Monkey, be made an honored guest at the party?” “Well, we told you the rule for the last festival,” said the Immortal Maidens, “but we do not know what will happen this time.” “You are right,” said the Great Sage, “and I don’t blame you. You all just stand here and let old Monkey go and do a little detection to find out whether he’s invited or not.”
Dear Great Sage! He made a magic sign and recited a spell, saying to the various Immortal Maidens, “Stay! Stay! Stay!” This was the magic of immobilization, the effect of which was that the Seven-Gown Immortal Maidens all stood wide-eyed and transfixed beneath the peach trees. Leaping out of the garden, the Great Sage mounted his hallowed cloud and headed straight for the Jasper Pool. As he journeyed, he saw over there
A skyful of holy mist with sparkling light,
And five-colored clouds passing ceaselessly.11
The cries of white cranes pierced the ninefold Heav’n;
Purple fungi bloomed through a thousand leaves.
Right in this midst an immortal appeared
With a natural, fair face and manner distinct.
His spirit glowed like a dancing rainbow;
A list of no birth or death hung from his waist.
His name, the Great Immortal of Naked Feet:12
Attending the Peaches Feast he’d lengthen his age.
That Great Immortal of Naked Feet ran right into the Great Sage, who, his head bowed, was just devising a plan to deceive the real immortal. Since he wanted to go in secret to the festival, he asked, “Where is the Venerable Wisdom going?” The Great Immortal said, “On the kind invitation of the Queen Mother, I am going to the happy Festival of Immortal Peaches.” “The Venerable Wisdom has not yet learned of what I’m about to say,” said the Great Sage. “Because of the speed of my cloud somersault, the Jade Emperor has sent old Monkey out to all five thoroughfares to invite people to go first to the Hall of Perfect Light for a rehearsal of ceremonies before attending the banquet.” Being a sincere and honest man, the Great Immortal took the lie for the truth, though he protested, “In years past we rehearsed right at the Jasper Pool and expressed our gratitude there. Why do we have to go to the Hall of Perfect Light for rehearsal this time before attending the banquet?” Nonetheless, he had no choice but to change the direction of his hallowed cloud and go straight to the hall.
Treading the cloud, the Great Sage recited a spell and, with one shake of his body, changed into the form of the Great Immortal of Naked Feet. It did not take him very long before he reached the treasure chamber. He stopped his cloud and walked softly inside. There he found
Swirling waves of ambrosial fragrance,
Dense layers of holy mist,
A jade terrace decked with ornaments,
A chamber full of the life force,
Ethereal shapes of the phoenix soaring and the argus rising,
And undulant forms of gold blossoms with stems of jade.
Set upon there were the Screen of Nine Phoenixes in Twilight,
The Beacon Mound of Eight Treasures and Purple Mist,
A table inlaid with five-color gold,
And a green jade pot of a thousand flowers.
On the tables were dragon livers and phoenix marrow,
Bear paws and the lips of apes.13
Most tempting was every one of the hundred delicacies,
And most succulent the hue of every kind of fruit and food.
Everything was laid out in an orderly fashion, but no deity had yet arrived for the feast. Our Great Sage could not make an end of staring at the scene when he suddenly felt the overpowering aroma of wine. Turning his head, he saw, in the long corridor to the right, several wine-making divine officials and grain-mashing stewards. They were giving directions to the few Daoists charged with carrying water and the boys who took care of the fire in washing out the barrels and scrubbing the jugs. For they had already finished making the wine, rich and mellow as the juices of jade. The Great Sage could not prevent the saliva from dripping out of the corner of his mouth, and he wanted to have a taste at once, except that the people were all standing there. He therefore resorted to magic. Plucking a few hairs, he threw them into his mouth and chewed them to pieces before spitting them out. He recited a spell and cried “Change!” They changed into many sleep-inducing insects, which landed on the people’s faces. Look at them, how their hands grow weak, their heads droop, and their eyelids sink down. They dropped their activities, and all fell sound asleep. The Great Sage then took some of the rare delicacies and choicest dainties and ran into the corridor. Standing beside the jars and leaning on the barrels, he abandoned himself to drinking. After feasting for a long time, he became thoroughly drunk, but he turned this over in his mind, “Bad! Bad! In a little while, when the invited guests arrive, won’t they be indignant with me? What will happen to me once I’m caught? I’d better go back home now and sleep it off!”
Dear Great Sage! Reeling from side to side, he stumbled along solely on the strength of wine, and in a moment he lost his way. It was not the Equal to Heaven Residence that he went to, but the Tushita Palace. The moment he saw it, he realized his mistake. “The Tushita Palace is at the uppermost of the thirty-three Heavens,” he said, “the Griefless Heaven, which is the home of the Most High Laozi. How did I get here? No matter, I’ve always wanted to see this old man but have never found the opportunity. Now that it’s on my way, I might as well pay him a visit.” He straightened out his attire and pushed his way in, but Laozi was nowhere to be seen. In fact, there was not a trace of anyone. The fact of the matter was that Laozi, accompanied by the Aged Buddha Dīpaṁkara, was giving a lecture on the tall, three-storied Red Mound Elixir Platform. The various divine youths, commanders, and officials were all attending the lecture, standing on both sides of the platform. Searching around, our Great Sage went all the way to the alchemical room. He found no one but saw fire burning in an oven beside the hearth, and around the oven were five gourds in which finished elixir was stored. “This thing is the greatest treasure of immortals,” said the Great Sage happily. “Since old Monkey has understood the Way and comprehended the mystery of the Internal’s identity with the External, I have also wanted to produce some golden elixir on my own to benefit people. While I have been too busy at other times even to think about going home to enjoy myself, good fortune has met me at the door today and presented me with this! As long as Laozi is not around, I’ll take a few tablets and try the taste of something new.” He poured out the contents of all the gourds and ate them like fried beans.
In a moment, the effect of the elixir had dispelled that of the wine, and he again thought to himself, “Bad! Bad! I have brought on myself calamity greater than Heaven! If the Jade Emperor has knowledge of this, it’ll be difficult to preserve my life! Go! Go! Go! I’ll go back to the Region Below to be a king.” He ran out of the Tushita Palace and, avoiding the former way, left by the West Heaven Gate, making himself invisible by the magic of body concealment. Lowering the direction of his cloud, he returned to the Flower-Fruit Mountain. There he was greeted by flashing banners and shining spears, for the four mighty commanders and the monster kings of seventy-two caves were engaging in a military exercise. “Little ones,” the Great Sage called out loudly, “I have returned!” The monsters dropped their weapons and knelt down, saying, “Great Sage! What laxity of mind! You left us for so long, and did not even once visit us to see how we were doing.” “It’s not that long!” said the Great Sage. “It’s not that long!” They walked as they talked, and went deep inside the cave dwelling. After sweeping the place clean and preparing a place for him to rest, and after kowtowing and doing homage, the four mighty commanders said, “The Great Sage has been living for over a century in Heaven. May we ask what appointment he actually received?”
“I re
call that it’s been but half a year,” said the Great Sage, laughing. “How can you talk of a century?” “One day in Heaven,” said the commanders, “is equal to one year on Earth.” The Great Sage said, “I am glad to say that the Jade Emperor this time was more favorably disposed toward me, and he did indeed appoint me Great Sage, Equal to Heaven. An official residence was built for me, and two departments—Peace and Quiet, and Serene Spirit—were established, with bodyguards and attendants in each department. Later, when it was found that I carried no responsibility, I was asked to take care of the Garden of Immortal Peaches. Recently the Lady Queen Mother gave the Grand Festival of Immortal Peaches, but she did not invite me. Without waiting for her invitation, I went first to the Jasper Pool and secretly consumed the food and wine. Leaving that place, I staggered into the palace of Laozi and finished up all the elixir stored in five gourds. I was afraid that the Jade Emperor would be offended, and so I decided to walk out of the Heaven Gate.”
The various monsters were delighted by these words, and they prepared a banquet of fruits and wine to welcome him. A stone bowl was filled with coconut wine and presented to the Great Sage, who took a mouthful and then exclaimed with a grimace, “It tastes awful! Just awful!” “The Great Sage,” said Beng and Ba, the two commanders, “has grown accustomed to tasting divine wine and food in Heaven. Small wonder that coconut wine now seems hardly delectable. But the proverb says, ‘Tasty or not, it’s water from home!’” “And all of you are, ‘related or not, people from home’!” said the Great Sage. “When I was enjoying myself this morning at the Jasper Pool, I saw many jars and jugs in the corridor full of the juices of jade, which you have never savored. Let me go back and steal a few bottles to bring down here. Just drink half a cup, and each one of you will live long without growing old.” The various monkeys could not contain their delight. The Great Sage immediately left the cave and, with one somersault, went directly back to the Festival of Immortal Peaches, again using the magic of body concealment. As he entered the doorway of the Palace of the Jasper Pool, he saw that the wine makers, the grain mashers, the water carriers, and the fire tenders were still asleep and snoring. He took two large bottles, one under each arm, and carried two more in his hands. Reversing the direction of his cloud, he returned to the monkeys in the cave. They held their own Festival of Immortal Wine, with each one drinking a few cups, which incident we shall relate no further.
Now we tell you about the Seven-Gown Immortal Maidens, who did not find a release from the Great Sage’s magic of immobilization until a whole day had gone by. Each one of them then took her flower basket and reported to the Queen Mother, saying, “We are delayed because the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven, imprisoned us with his magic.” “How many baskets of immortal peaches have you gathered?” asked the Queen Mother. “Only two baskets of small peaches, and three of medium-sized peaches,” said the Immortal Maidens, “for when we went to the back of the grove, there was not even half a large one left! We think the Great Sage must have eaten them all. As we went looking for him, he unexpectedly made his appearance and threatened us with violence and beating. He also questioned us about who had been invited to the banquet, and we gave him a thorough account of the last festival. It was then that he bound us with a spell, and we didn’t know where he went. It was only a moment ago that we found release and so could come back here.”
When the Queen Mother heard these words, she went immediately to the Jade Emperor and presented him with a full account of what had taken place. Before she finished speaking, the group of wine makers together with the various divine officials also came to report: “Someone unknown to us has vandalized the Festival of Immortal Peaches. The juice of jade, the eight dainties, and the hundred delicacies have all been stolen or eaten up.” Four royal preceptors then came up to announce, “The Supreme Patriarch of Dao has arrived.” The Jade Emperor went out with the Queen Mother to greet him. Having paid his respects to them, Laozi said, “There are, in the house of this old Daoist, some finished Golden Elixir of Nine Turns,14 which are reserved for the use of Your Majesty during the next Grand Festival of Cinnabar. Strange to say, they have been stolen by some thief, and I have come specifically to make this known to Your Majesty.” This report stunned the Jade Emperor. Presently the officials from the Equal to Heaven Residence came to announce, kowtowing, “The Great Sage Sun has not been discharging his duties of late. He went out yesterday and still has not yet returned. Moreover, we do not know where he went.” These words gave the Jade Emperor added anxiety.
Next came the Great Immortal of Naked Feet, who prostrated himself and said, “Yesterday, in response to the Queen Mother’s invitation, your subject was on his way to attend the festival when he met by chance the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven. The Sage said to your subject that Your Majesty had ordered him to send your subject first to the Hall of Perfect Light for a rehearsal of ceremonies before attending the banquet. Your subject followed his direction and duly went to the hall. But I did not see the dragon chariot and the phoenix carriage of Your Majesty, and therefore hastened to come here to wait upon you.”
More astounded than ever, the Jade Emperor said, “This fellow now falsifies imperial decrees and deceives my worthy ministers! Let the Divine Minister of Detection quickly locate his whereabouts!” The minister received his order and left the palace to make a thorough investigation. After obtaining all the details, he returned presently to report, “The person who has so profoundly disturbed Heaven is none other than the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven.” He then gave a repeated account of all the previous incidents, and the Jade Emperor was furious. He at once commanded the Four Great Devarājas to assist Devarāja Li and Prince Naṭa. Together, they called up the Twenty-Eight Constellations, the Nine Luminaries, the Twelve Horary Branches, the Fearless Guards of Five Quarters,15 the Four Temporal Guardians,16 the Stars of East and West, the Gods of North and South, the Deities of the Five Mountains and the Four Rivers,17 the Star Spirits of the entire Heaven, and a hundred thousand celestial soldiers. They were ordered to set up eighteen sets of cosmic net, to journey to the Region Below, to encircle completely the Flower-Fruit Mountain, and to capture the rogue and bring him to justice. All the deities immediately alerted their troops and departed from the Heavenly Palace. As they left, this was the spectacle of the expedition:
Yellow with dust; the churning wind concealed the darkening sky:
Reddish with clay, the rising fog o’erlaid the dusky world.
Because an impish monkey insulted the Highest Lord,
The saints of all Heaven descended to this mortal Earth.
Those Four Great Devarājas,
Those Fearless Guards of Five Quarters—
Those Four Great Deva Kings made up the main command;
Those Fearless Guards of Five Quarters moved countless troops.
Li, the Pagoda Bearer, gave orders from the army’s center,
With the fierce Naṭa as the captain of his vanward forces.
The Star of Rāhu, at the forefront, made the roll call;
The Star of Ketu, noble and tall, brought up the rear:
Sōma, the moon, displayed a spirit most eager;
Āditya, the sun, was all shining and radiant.
Heroes of special talents were the Stars of Five Phases.
The Nine Luminaries most relished a good battle.
The Horary Branches of Zi, Wu, Mao, and Yao—
They were all celestial guardians of titanic strength.
To the east and west, the Five Plagues18 and the Five Mountains!
To the left and right, the Six Gods of Darkness and the Six Gods of Light!
Above and below, the Dragon Gods of the Four Rivers!
And in tightest formation, the Twenty-Eight Constellations!19
Citrā, Svātī, Viśākhā, and Anurādhā were the captains.
Revatī, Aśvinī, Apabharaṇī, and Kṛttikā knew combat well.
Uttara-Aṣādhā, Abhijit, Śravaṇā, Śraviṣṭha, Pūrva-Proṣ�
�hapada, Uttara-Proṣṭhapada,
Rohiṇī, Mūlabarhaṇī, Pūrva-Aṣādhā—every one an able star!
Punarvasu, Tiṣya, Aśleṣā, Meghā, Pūrva-Phalgunī, Uttara-Phalgunī, and Hastā—
All brandished swords and spears to show their power.
Stopping the cloud and lowering the mist they came to this mortal world
And pitched their tents before the Mountain of Flower and Fruit.
The poem says:
The Heav’n-born Monkey King who can change a lot
Steals wine and elixir to joy in his mountain lair.
Since he spoiled the Feast of the Immortal Peach,
A hundred thousand Heaven troops spread the net of God.
Devarāja Li now gave the order for the celestial soldiers to pitch their tents, and a cordon was drawn so tightly around the Flower-Fruit Mountain that not even water could escape! Moreover, eighteen sets of cosmic net were spread out above and below the region, and the Nine Luminaries were then ordered to go into battle. They led their troops and advanced to the cave, in front of which they found a troop of monkeys, both great and small, prancing about playfully. “Little monsters over there,” cried one of the Star Spirits in a severe voice, “where is your Great Sage? We are Heavenly deities sent here from the Region Above to subdue your rebellious Great Sage. Tell him to come here quickly and surrender. If he but utters half a ‘No,’ all of you will be executed.” Hastily the little monsters reported inside, “Great Sage, disaster! Disaster! Outside there are nine savage deities who claim that they are sent from the Region Above to subdue the Great Sage.” Our Great Sage was just sharing the Heavenly wine with the four mighty commanders and the monster kings of seventy-two caves. Hearing this announcement, he said in a most nonchalant manner,