“Fuck, Winter,” Noah yelled.
He hurried toward the back door and went into the beach house.
I shut my eyes and swallowed hard.
Facing the truth… it really sucked.
I almost liked it better when I remembered nothing about myself or my life.
I followed Noah into the kitchen.
He walked around the island and went right back outside.
I sighed and kept going.
Now he was acting like a child.
And I didn’t have time for that.
None of us did.
When he got to the steps of the deck, I caught up and grabbed his shirt.
“Noah, stop this,” I said.
He spun around and hurried to kiss me.
His lips brushed against mine and I pushed away from him.
I wiped my lips and made a fist.
“Do that again and I’ll tell Xavier,” I warned.
“That’s right. Break up our friendship. Why not, right? You have no fucking heart, Winter.”
“Yes I do. I’m trying to be honest. I can’t justify who I used to be. I would never try it either. I’m admitting I was a bad person. I’m not asking you to forgive me either. I’m just telling you the way it is.”
“That you, what, love Xavier? And he loves you? And this all happened last night into this morning?”
“Yeah.”
“Please,” he said. “Let’s go to your bedroom. I bet if I fucked you too you’d say you love me.”
I swung my fist but Noah stepped out of the way.
“Nice try,” he said. “Swing and a miss. Just like with me. Just like with Xavier. Just like with your fake plan to hurt us. You can’t hurt us, Winter.”
“I just did,” I said.
Noah took a deep breath. “We’re finishing what we started.”
“What about the people following us?” I asked.
“I’ll figure that out. But first I have to get this shit off my chest.”
Noah turned and pointed at the beach.
I looked and saw someone jogging along the shoreline.
“What are you going to do?” I asked. “Fight that guy?”
“That’s Andrew,” Noah said. “Not that long ago, he got mouthy behind my back. He didn’t like something we did. And instead of coming to me face to face about it, he talked behind my back. I found out and he waited for me to confront him. That was too easy. So I let it slide. But I keep all of that locked away for a moment like this.”
Noah charged down the steps.
“Noah!” I yelled. “Wait!”
He just kept going.
He walked.
Andrew jogged.
And Andrew was so focused on jogging, he didn’t see Noah at first.
But the second he did, he stopped and took his sunglasses off.
He tried to smile and say something, but Noah moved fast.
He pounced at Andrew like a wild animal.
I covered my mouth but realized I didn’t need to do that anymore. I didn’t need to be shocked by the violence. I didn’t need to gasp and let my mind try to come up with some excuse as to why this was happening.
This was just the normal.
This was just how Noah was.
I hadn’t been much better in life before the accident.
Even if I didn’t throw fists… I threw around words. Which could hurt just as much - or worse - if done a certain way.
Noah didn’t just hit Andrew once.
That wasn’t his style.
It was a fury of punches.
One of them sent Andrew to the ground.
Noah then leaned over Andrew and kept swinging.
I didn’t even try to count the punches because truthfully, I didn’t want to know.
When Noah stopped, he kicked Andrew, and yelled something.
Andrew scrambled to his feet and ran off in the opposite direction, holding his face.
Noah had made his point.
But he wasn’t done yet.
Noah walked back to the beach house.
He stopped at the bottom of the steps.
His white shirt had blood on it.
That, again, was just normal for Noah.
I didn’t plan on saying anything to him.
So I stood there in silence too.
Finally, Noah made a move.
He unbuttoned his white shirt and took it off.
He balled up the shirt and threw it up the steps at me.
The shirt landed at my feet.
Shirtless, Noah nodded and walked around the beach house to leave.
I crouched down and swallowed hard.
I grabbed the shirt and knew I had to throw it out.
I had broken Noah’s heart.
That was kind of the thing I had wanted to do all along.
But now I knew everything. I knew the truth.
And I was starting to seriously hate myself.
Easton was next.
Whatever was going to happen with the plan we had made about the money, we all needed to come together and figure it out. That meant no more secrets or lies.
I texted Gia to check up on her.
Which I did not need to do.
She was still living the Troc life with Talon.
Enjoying every second of it - at least according to her.
I told her to watch out for Emily with a wink emoji.
She replied back with the same emoji.
Gia wasn’t in the mood to chat. Not that I could blame her. She didn’t have to hide what was happening with Talon. She could be herself at his place. She could feel alive. And she could have all the attention she ever wanted.
I sat on the top step of the deck and rested my head against the pillar of the railing.
Watching and listening to the waves was very soothing.
Slowly, my eyes began to shut.
I fell asleep and only realized that when I felt someone shaking my shoulder.
When my eyes climbed open, Easton was in my face.
Grinning.
“Hey,” he said. “Want me to carry you to bed?”
“What?”
“Are you that tired?” Easton asked. “I’ll take you to bed. It’ll be our secret. Like what happened in the car.”
I threw my left elbow and hit him in the chest.
He let out a playful ooohhh sound and backed away.
“Nothing ever happened in a car between us,” I said.
“You don’t remember everything. Remember?”
“You know, I never want to hear that word again,” I said. “Remember. I hate that word.”
Easton laughed. “But the thing is… I’m not lying.”
“What do you mean?”
“There was one night when you and I were alone,” Easton said. “We were in my car. We were just cruising around, talking about the plan. Making sure everything made sense. Noah was busy saving his image. And Xavier was at the shop alone. I was taking you home that night. You asked me to pull over.”
“Easton. Stop.”
“I swear on my life,” he said. “We pulled over and talked. I don’t know, Winter, it felt like there was this moment between us. When we looked at each other, it was just…” Easton let out a breath. “I’m pretty sure you leaned toward me. And I caught myself leaning toward you. I knew if I kissed you, we were going to end up in the backseat. I didn’t want to do that and hurt anyone…”
“Me? Or Noah?”
“Or Xavier,” Easton said.
“Xavier?”
“Come on, Winter,” Easton said. “You had them both wrapped around your finger. Noah and Xavier. I saw what you were doing. You were worried about us so you got into our heads. Well, their heads. Not mine. I saw it and stopped it. Also, for the record, I regret it.”
“You regret it?”
“Oh, yeah,” Easton said. “I knew what I was giving up on. You were devious, Winter. Not that I could blame you for it.”
I sighed. “So the car s
tory was true. Or at least sort of true.”
“It was our secret,” he said. “Not that it matters now. You wanted to talk to me alone. This is where you tell me… what?”
I licked my lips. “I want everyone to be able to get together and figure out what happened with this plan. And figure out who is following us. We have to stop this. Before someone gets hurt again.”
“I agree with that,” Easton said. “I didn’t need to be here alone for that.”
“No,” I said. “I, uh, I’m… I’m in love with Xavier.”
Easton nodded. “Got it.”
“That’s it?” I asked.
“What?”
“Noah freaked out.”
“You told Noah already?” Easton asked.
“Yeah.”
Easton smiled. “Okay. I don’t know what you want me to do, Winter. You love the guy. I’m assuming he loves you. If that’s what you two want, then have at it.”
“Wow,” I said. “I thought you’d put up a fight.”
“Oh, this doesn’t change a thing for us, Winter,” Easton said. He moved closer to me. “I’ll never forget our moment in the car. I’ll never stop talking about it either. And if shit hits the fan with Xavier, I’ll be your fallback guy, right?”
There was just something soothing about Easton. As rough as he was…
I laughed.
“Deal,” I said.
“Can we kiss on that deal?” Easton asked.
“A handshake works fine,” I said.
We shook hands.
Easton walked down to the beach, lit a cigarette and walked away.
When he was out of sight, I grabbed my phone and texted Xavier.
I needed him to love me because I wasn’t sure if I was able to love myself.
Chapter 14
The band is back together
I ran alongside Gia as she jogged.
The girl wasn’t even breaking a sweat and I looked like someone threw a bucket of water at my face.
“It was just amazing to feel that way,” she said. “You know?”
“Yeah,” I said.
“I mean it,” she said. “I’ve been down there a few times before but it was always so quiet. I felt nervous. Looking over my shoulder. Like I was doing something wrong.”
“Gia,” I said. “Are you really that happy?”
“I am,” she said. “And don’t think I don’t know how fast it can end. I’m not asking Talon to propose to me or something crazy.”
“Okay,” I said. “Believe me, I-”
Gia touched my arm and we stopped moving.
She looked at me.
I gasped for a few breaths and put my hand up, silently asking her to give me a second.
“Are you judging me?” Gia asked.
“No,” I said. “Never. I… I care about you.” I took another breath. “You’re my best friend. And… there was a minute or two I was jealous.”
“You? Jealous of me?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“Why?”
I sucked in a breath and held it for a few seconds.
Then I slowly released it.
“When I was at his place… I kind of liked it. In a dirty, gross way. I knew I could never live there forever or live like that, but there was something relaxing about it. Not having to worry about a thing.”
“That’s exactly how I feel too,” Gia said. “Winter, did you have feelings for Talon?”
“I don’t think so,” I said. “I was paying him to protect me. That’s all. I think…” My mouth went dry.
“Be honest,” Gia said. “We have to be honest with each other, right?”
“I was a bitch,” I said. “The more I learn about who I was before the accident, the more I hate myself. And with Talon, I just assumed he wanted me. Because I was a Bump and he was a Troc. Meaning I could just boss him around. So I just told myself that if the time came and I wanted to get some… you know… he would be there to give it to me.” I touched Gia’s arm. “But he didn’t. When I got drunk and wanted him to do that to me, he refused. So in a really messed up way, he had the chance to sleep with me and he didn’t do it because of you.”
Gia nodded. “Okay. And now…?”
“Gia, I would never do that to you. Ever. I wanted to tell you something too. But… I’m so sorry for what happen to Talon.”
“He’s fine,” Gia said. “We talked about it. I was scared out of my mind when it happened. When he threw himself into things. When he got punched. But you know what? No offense… those other guys are pussies. Noah. Easton. Xavier. Pussy. Pussy. Pussy. Three of them? One of Talon?”
“I’m in love with Xavier,” I said.
Gia’s eyes went wide.
She turned and started to run away.
I was never going to catch her.
So I just went back to my version of running, which was a quick jog.
I knew eventually Gia would get over herself and stop and wait for me.
The girl was so damn reactive when it came to her emotions.
And with Xavier…
What did it matter?
There was a reason though, and I was going to do whatever I needed to do to get it out of her.
I jogged.
She ran.
She had an obvious lead on me.
For a second I thought she was going to end up disappearing out of sight.
If that happened, I was just going to stop and go back home.
I had enough on my plate as it was. Not that I didn’t love Gia, but I didn’t need her attitude in such large doses.
Gia looked back once, and that was all I needed.
I waved my arms and slowed from a jog to a walk.
She turned and stopped running.
This felt like a giant waste of time, but Gia was my best friend.
We walked toward each other.
“Xavier?” she asked.
“Talon?” I threw back at her.
“Don’t do that.”
“I am,” I said. “You don’t get it, Gia. These feelings have been around since before the accident. There were things I didn’t remember and now I do. I’m in trouble. Possibly big trouble. I could use a friend right now.”
“What do you mean by trouble?” Gia asked.
“I’ll tell you in a little bit,” I said. “I wanted you to know about Xavier. I wanted to apologize for what they did to Talon. And I wanted to apologize to you for asking Talon to help me even after I knew about you two. That was wrong. I was scared. And then he got hurt.”
“I already told you I don’t care,” Gia said. “Him beat up just makes him look sexier. Plus, if it doesn’t bother him, then it doesn’t bother me. He knows more than I do about this stuff.”
“I still feel bad,” I said. “And with Xavier…”
I was then walking a fine line of a big secret.
“You really love him?” Gia asked.
“Yeah. I felt it. I remembered it. It’s real for me.”
“Okay. Sorry for storming away. I just needed a second.”
“Gia, there’s more,” I said. “We said no secrets and I’m keeping to it.”
“Are you pregnant?”
“What?” I yelled. “No. Xavier knows the truth. About everything.”
“About me?” Gia asked.
“Yeah,” I said. “That was a big part of the reason he freaked out when he realized you and Talon were together. It wasn’t just a Bump and Troc thing. He cares about you. It’s not my place to talk about it though. That’s something you and him have to work out. But he knows.”
Gia took a deep breath.
She looked around for a second.
“I can’t believe this is where it’s all at,” she said. “This started out with you trying to get revenge on them for trying to hurt you…”
“And they weren’t the ones who did it,” I said. “There’s a lot I have to tell you.”
Gia stared at me. “I mean this with love, Winter, but somet
imes I wonder just who you are.”
“I wonder the same thing too,” I said. “The accident took away some pieces of my memory but those actions and results are still lingering around. I can’t escape it. I have to face it.”
“Just how much do you have to tell me?” Gia asked.
“Enough that we’re going to get a really long run in today.”
“Well, I’ll get a decent jog, right?” Gia asked with a smile.
“You’re a bitch,” I said.
“Don’t worry, Winter, if you keep getting yourself into trouble, you’ll learn how to run faster.”
“Bitch,” I said again.
Gia grabbed my hand and started to run.
I ran with her but knew I couldn’t keep up her pace.
Too much, and I would pass out.
And something about that felt really symbolic.
“I’ll be back later,” I said.
My mother snapped her fingers. “Where are you going?”
“Does it matter?”
“Maybe it does.”
“I’m going out. Just letting you know. Not asking for permission. I don’t need to ask for permission.”
“I got a call today,” my mother said. “Two calls.”
“Oh?”
“Call number one… your father. He wanted to check in on you. He wants to know why you’re not following up with the doctors. I’m out of excuses. It might be time to just tell him and everyone else you have your memory back.”
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll take care of that.”
“You’re calm about it.”
“I’m numb to it,” I said.
“Good answer.”
“What was the second call?”
“BFH,” she said.
I cringed. “And…?”
“Are you done there or what?”
“I’m good,” I said. “Just give me a little time. I was in an accident, remember? I don’t have my memory, remember?”
My mother smiled. “You’re starting to sound like me.”
The doorbell rang, which ended the conversation.
I hurried to the door but my mother followed me.
When I opened the door to sneak out, she ripped the door all the way open.
Xavier stood there, surprised.
“Well, well, well,” my mother said. “Haven’t I seen you around here before? Sneaking around? Climbing through windows? Was that you? Or was that some other guy?”
Devious Love (Bay Falls High NEXT Book 3) Page 13