Sylvan

by Jan Irving

  Finally they headed back. Mal’s calves and arms were a little heavy since he hadn’t done such long-distance swimming in a while. He knew he’d have to take a break before heading back to Nan’s cottage.

  Leif seemed to pick up on this, and when they exited the water next to his dock, he said, “I think you better relax and warm up a little. I can drive you home.”

  Mal said, “I was a little surprised you weren’t out rowing. I thought we’d just pass each other tonight or something.”

  Leif flushed under the moonlight, as if pleased at the idea that Mal had sought him out. “No, I didn’t want to leave my Papa. He’s a little unpredictable and can get really agitated if I’m not close to the house at night.”

  “Shit, I’m sorry,” Mal said, feeling bad. Had it been okay to lure Leif away? And yet the other man had seemed as if he wanted to go swimming with Mal. “Don’t worry about driving me home.”

  “You’re shivering,” Leif scolded, gray eyes narrowed on Mal’s huddled figure.

  “I’m just not used to that much distance.” Mal shrugged. He tried to stop but his body shuddered spasmodically every now and then.

  Leif leaned over the pier and into his dinghy and hefted out a big plaid blanket. “Put that on around your shoulders.”

  “You’re shivering a little too,” Mal pointed out.

  “The breeze has picked up.” Leif pointed to the beach. “I’ll make a little beach fire.”

  Mal was content to follow after the larger man, watching as he put some driftwood and kindling into a ring of stones as Mal settled on the beach. His suit felt clammy, so he pulled it off under the blanket, shaking it out and hanging it over a leaning willow branch. He saw Leif’s quick glance and knew he’d noticed.

  In a few moments, Leif had a small crackling fire started. Mal stared at it, not knowing what to say. It was late. They both needed to get some sleep, and yet it seemed that, like him, Leif was loath to let the evening end.

  “Come under the blanket. There’s plenty of room for us to sit side by side,” Mal encouraged. He could see Leif was still a little chilled.

  Leif obediently edged closer and put a tentative bit of wool over his legs. He swept Mal a sideways glance.

  Mal gave an impatient sound and tossed more blanket his way so they were both snugly under it.

  They sat without speaking, staring at the blue and gold lick of the flames, sparks rising every now and then as the fire spat out some bit of wood. Then Mal felt abruptly sleepy, his body heavy from all the exercise and fresh air, so he leaned back on his elbows and then pillowed his head on a bit of driftwood.

  Chapter Five

  JUST before dawn, Mal woke up, his back stiff and his prick also stiff and interested. He was curled safe in Leif’s arms. “Mmmm,” he commented, thinking he didn’t care that sand had dried in his hair or they’d barely gotten any sleep. In fact, they hadn’t even got it on yet, but this was… nice.

  Leif blinked at him and Mal said, “Did you sleep at all?”

  “A little. I kept watching for Papa.”

  Mal had heard in town about Leif’s dad and the problems he gave his son. He sighed, thinking of his Nan. “‘We weep for ourselves’,” he quoted softly.

  Leif stared at him, and in that humming moment, as birds made busy in the trees, waking up, there was a moment of total understanding. Mal couldn’t help but cup Leif’s cheek and press his lips gently against him. A first kiss…. He hadn’t even kissed him when he’d shucked his clothes and offered himself that first night. Now….

  Licking, tasting, gentle, like the water lapping lazy onto the beach.

  Leif trembled, his big hands making restless movements against Mal’s back, as if he didn’t know what to do.

  And Mal pulled back. “I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered. Innocent. This man was innocent like no one Mal had ever been with.

  “I don’t want that either,” Leif croaked. Then he cleared his throat and smiled. “I have to get up.”

  Mal cocked a brow.

  “I mean ‘up-up’, not….” Leif blushed since Mal’s nude body was pressed against his own answering hunger.

  Mal sighed in surrender. “All right.” He rolled away and then reached for his swimming trunks, hissing since they were still a little damp against his aroused body as he tugged them on.

  “What are you doing?” Leif asked, standing up and stretching his large body. Oh, he had muscles on muscles, as Mal had noted previously. Mmm-mmm. Mal wanted to trace them with his tongue.

  Instead he splashed into the shallows, hoping to cool off. “Heading home.”

  “I can drive you,” Leif offered faintly.

  “Go see to your Papa,” Mal said. He understood Leif’s need to do that. If Nan were alive, he’d want to take care of her too. “I’ll see you at work, boss man.” He put some sugar in the last two words, just to make Leif blush again.

  He was delighted when it worked.

  HIS first day on the job wasn’t exactly easy for Mal, it turned out.

  First, he got home and barely had time to eat half of one of Nan’s frozen diet cakes he found in the freezer—which tasted a bit like highway gravel after a hard frost—since he was out of anything for breakfast. He’d forgotten again to go grocery shopping.

  Then he realized he had no idea where today’s job was. He’d eaten icy brownie and stared out at his front yard and tried to think how to handle that. He didn’t exactly want to call Leif and come off like a moron his first day.

  So he called Marty Swenson, who knew everything happening in the small town, and soon found out the work was on the old Small property. Okay, he just had to get there in time.

  He dressed in an old T-shirt and jeans and put on his new work boots, which right away started rubbing a blister on the back of his left heel. Then he got in his truck and headed over, thinking maybe… had he forgotten something?

  But once he arrived, the guys working there greeted him in an easygoing manner, and he waited until Leif had a moment from talking to his electrician before finding out what he’d be assigned to do that day.

  He didn’t imagine the big thump his pulse gave when he saw his Viking again, even though he’d just seen him an hour before.

  “Wheelbarrow’s out back,” Leif said. “The guys pulled down a lot of old walls so all that debris needs to go to the dumpster in the driveway. You brought heavy gloves, right? You need them to protect your hands from old nails and stuff.”

  Mal nodded. Okay, so he was on clean-up duty. Well, he could handle that.

  Leif studied him sharply for a moment and in a lower tone asked, “You okay?” Meaning he knew how late Mal had been up since he’d been there.

  “Fine,” Mal said, though he did feel a little wasted. But he was used to sucking it up after partying, and it wasn’t that hot. Yet.

  THE July day climbed steadily in temperature into something that made Mal wish he could sit in the shade and sip something cool or spend it submerged in the shallow water next to the beach.

  Instead he collected debris from the half-torn down old cabin, piling it into a wheelbarrow and making trip after trip. Pretty soon sweat dripped from his face, and his upper arms and back were burning, not to mention the fucking blister, which had grown and cloned itself on his other heel.

  Lunch was called, and then Mal realized what he’d forgotten. He didn’t have so much as a soda, but that was okay. He was so tired he flaked out under a birch tree, letting his head fall back as he just breathed for a while.

  “Cheddar and apple sandwich?” Leif’s voice broke his exhausted stupor.

  “Um?” Mal blinked, looking up at his new boss. Leif had spent most of the day talking to his guys or on the phone while he hauled load after load, in the glimpses Mal had caught.

  “You need to eat. And drink up. Don’t you have a water bottle?” Leif scolded. “Shit, Mal….”

  Mal flushed, since as an athlete he normally always carried things like snacks and water. He knew th
at he could bleed energy and crash if he didn’t eat up and keep hydrated when necessary, but today he’d completely forgotten about lunch.

  “Here. Bottled water, cheddar sandwich, and a Danish.”

  “That’s your lunch, Leif,” Mal protested, though his stomach growled. He felt a little shaky with hunger.

  Leif towered over Mal, his hands on his hips. He definitely wasn’t looking unsure of himself now. He was the boss. “I’m going home to check on Papa. I’ll grab something there. Eat up.” He turned to walk back to his SUV and then paused. “And good job today.”

  Mal managed a tired smile as he reached for the food, deciding to be practical. Besides, even though he knew Leif was just doing his job, he felt kind of looked-after. He guessed it was corny, but he liked the feeling. “Thanks.”

  MAL felt almost too tired to stagger to his truck and drive home when three o’clock finally arrived and it was time to stop for the day. Every part of his body hurt, despite the good shape he’d thought he was in. He felt drained, and his head thumped dully from his early bout of near-dehydration.

  Leif walked over to the driver’s side of his truck, and Mal rolled down his window, feeling the effort in his sore wrists and forearms. Geez, he was in a pretty pathetic state.

  “I was going to drop by with my roofing guy at your place in an hour,” Leif said. His forehead creased. “But, Mal, you look….”

  Mal shook his head, not wanting to seem like some kind of loser in Leif’s eyes. He knew his reputation as a party boy, and he wanted to show him there was more to him. Or maybe remind himself. He was so beat he wasn’t sure. “I’ll be okay. I’d like to move forward.”

  Leif chewed his lip. “Okay, then. See you in an hour.”

  MAL took some soap and headed down to the lake. He had to do something with the laundry that was accumulating, had to go into town to do his grocery shopping and use the Laundromat. Man, he really wanted to get some machines hooked up in the cabin too. And he couldn’t exactly bathe in the lake in the middle of December.

  December…. Was he really thinking of staying here that long? He’d moved around quite a bit over the past few years, calling nowhere home. Except, in his heart, this place had always been home. Now after coming back, he’d recognized that was because Nan had been here. Could he make a life in Sylvan without her?

  The water cooled him off, and he felt a little better, though his body had an all-over ache, like he was coming down with the flu. On stiff legs, he headed back to his cabin, rubbing his hair dry with a towel. Just in time, since Leif had pulled up seconds before a stranger with sandy hair and smiling blue eyes who got out of his own truck and shook Leif’s hand. Leif introduced him to Mal as John Moreton, the roofing guy.

  Leif added, “We’ll need the ladder again for the outside of the cottage.”

  Mal nodded, and despite how warm he was feeling, he tried to push it aside, leading the way down the slope to the storage space under the cabin. He watched the other two men pull out the ladder, so tired that he was content to just let it play out. He had enough money to cover fixing the roof and maybe some of the changes he wanted to make. And hopefully he’d figure out what he was going to do with his life now that being on the swim team was over. For now, the job with Leif’s company should keep him in groceries.

  “John will go up on the roof and poke around. Why don’t you go inside and take it easy?” Leif looked concerned, and Mal was so bushed that all he did was nod. Yeah, he really needed to put his feet up.

  AS MAL was halfway up the slope to go back inside Nan’s cottage, a car screeched to a halt in his sand pit of a driveway. Brown-haired and lanky Joey Delany and slightly tubby and red-haired Martin Jacobs climbed out of an old Toyota Camry. Both men were former friends of Mal’s, guys he used to spend time with at Sylvan.

  Mal flashed back to what it had been like when he’d been younger, impatient to see the world and living with a secret—that he preferred men. He’d experimented with both Joey and Martin.

  “Hey, Mal, we heard you were here!” Joey greeted him with a hug and an appreciative wink, as if it hadn’t been years since he’d seen him.

  With mixed emotions, Mal sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. What now? He wasn’t in the mood to see these guys. Maybe it was just that he felt like he was coming down with something. But he wasn’t sure if they were people he’d want to hang with now. Did he have anything in common with them anymore?

  Still, he had to laugh at himself. Since when had he cared about that? Usually he just went where the action was.

  Belatedly, he noticed the atmosphere had grown charged, and his two former friends were looking beyond his shoulder. He also looked back and spotted Leif glaring at the newcomers. Terrific. Now what?

  “Yeah, I needed a place to take it easy for a while,” he said, hoping the guys would take the hint. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to see them again or not, so he was going to put it off for now. “Matter of fact, I just put in a long day’s work, so I was going to crash.”

  “You, crash?” Martin scoffed. “Come on, why don’t you come back to my place? We can put on some steaks, some music….”

  Yeah, and Mal knew where this would go. His cheeks heated as Leif moved up beside him quietly and gave him a comprehensive look. He’d obviously guessed correctly that these were some of the guys Mal had been with—at the same time.

  After an awkward pause while Mal tiredly groped for words, Leif put in softly, “He said he was tired.”

  Mal’s eyes widened in surprise. He hadn’t expected Leif to stand beside him like this. It had a subtle feeling of staking territory.

  “Who is this?” Joey asked, raising his eyebrows at Leif.

  Mal opened his mouth but Leif beat him to it again. “I’m a friend of Mal’s.”

  “Uh-huh. But not a boyfriend, so….” Joey smirked at Mal. “You can bring your friend if you want. There’s plenty to go around.”

  “I don’t share,” Leif said in an undertone that only Mal could hear.

  Mal glanced at him, saw the tension in his stance. He was glowering at both men now, but then he gave Mal a look, and Mal saw vulnerability in his gray eyes. He was probably expecting Mal to head off to the party.

  Mal took a deep breath. He was so tired and his head was thumping. He felt really shitty, worse than he should after a day’s work. “I don’t feel like it,” he said honestly. “But thanks, guys.”

  Martin shrugged. “Invitation is open for the rest of the week.” Joey followed him back to the car while Leif crossed his arms.

  Once they pulled away, Mal sagged down on the stairs, not sure he had the energy to head inside. Leif again gave him a frowning glance, but John called to him from the roof, and he disappeared around the side of the cottage.

  Mal rubbed his forehead, which was sweating. His hands were swollen and kind of pink-colored. He realized he had to have come down with something, maybe from the chill while he slept in Leif’s arms that morning.

  He dozed while he waited for the two men to return. Eventually they did, and John said he’d write up his findings and get back to Leif and Mal. Leif saw him off and then walked back to where Mal was still flaked out on the wooden steps.

  “You’re not well!” Leif sounded pissed. “Shit, Mal, don’t try to deny it.”

  “Nope,” Mal admitted. “I’m sorry, I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it to work tomorrow—”

  “Never mind.” Leif put an arm around his shoulders and helped him inside. “Where are you sleeping?”

  “On the floor, mostly,” Mal admitted, feeling oddly buoyant, as if Leif had again lifted him from the water. He probably wouldn’t have admitted his odd sleeping arrangement if he hadn’t been so wasted.

  Leif guided him gently into Nan’s room, to her nicely made bed with clean sheets and a lightweight summer comforter with green ivy and pansies on it. The bedding felt like heaven against Mal’s hot skin. “I can’t sleep here,” he mumbled.

  “Yes, you can,” L
eif contradicted him, glowering now at Mal. “I’m sure Nan would insist on it. Stay there and I’ll bring you some dinner.”

  “You don’t have to.” Mal wanted to bury his head in the pillow and drift. He wasn’t even hungry, like it would be too much effort to eat.

  “I want to take care of you, Mal,” Leif admitted. He reached out and stroked the damp hair off Mal’s forehead. His palm felt good, cool against Mal’s sweaty skin. Leif cleared his throat. “I guess you would have gone off with your friends if you weren’t so sick.”

  “I don’t know,” Mal croaked.

  Leif’s mouth tightened, but his eyes remained concerned on Mal’s face. “I’ll go into town and get you some soup and juice.” He climbed to his feet and opened the door to Nan’s bedroom.

  “Leif,” Mal called him, sitting up in bed. Heat washed through him at the movement so he sagged back a second later. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  Leif shook his head. “Don’t be an asshole. Rest and I’ll be back soon.”

  For some reason, Leif’s response left Mal smiling.

  Chapter Six

  MAL woke when Leif told him softly to sit up. He blinked hot gritty eyes at his new friend, wanting to be left alone to sleep, but that didn’t seem to be an option from the determined look on Leif’s face.

  He moved up the bed, Leif adjusting the pillows so he could eat the soup he’d brought in a takeout dish.

  “It’s minestrone from the diner,” Leif said. “And I bought you some apple juice. Not sure if you like that, but it’s all they had on hand today.”

  “Thanks,” Mal rasped. He wasn’t sure how he felt right now. Only Nan had ever taken care of him when he was sick. This was…. He liked it. “You seem to be a real caregiver.”