by E. M. Leya
"Sorta." Danny's blush deepened. "I really just want to know what it's like to be kissed."
How sad was it that he'd gone through enough sexual abuse that it would kill most people, yet he had never simply been kissed? With his growing attraction to Danny, kissing him was the last thing he should be considering. "Are you sure you want your first kiss to be with me?"
"It could be my only kiss." Danny shrugged. "I'm not sure I'd want to let anyone else get that close to me."
Marshall wanted to argue that, but it wasn't the time. "You know you can stop me anytime you want?" Was he really going to go through with this? What if he fucked Danny up worse than he already was? This was too soon. Too much after just escaping a life of hell.
"I know you won't hurt me." Danny stared into his eyes with total trust.
Fuck! Marshall leaned forward slightly, cupping Danny's face in his palms. "I'm honored to be your first." Without thinking about what he was doing, he closed the distance between them and kissed Danny softly. He kept it simple, just a brush of his lips over Danny's, but then he wanted another feel so he did it again. The second time, Danny's lips moved against his, kissing him back as his hands came up to grip Marshall's arms.
As Marshall tried to pull away, Danny moved with him, this time, Danny's lips finding his. The kiss was longer, their lips moving against each other more. It took all the willpower Marshall had not to pull Danny onto his lap and deepen the kiss. Just the touch of his lips sent fireworks off inside him. Little electrical currents jolted through his system, and they all ended at his cock, which went instantly hard.
"More," Danny said breathlessly against his mouth.
This was a mistake, but damn he wanted the same thing. Marshall closed his eyes as his lips touched Danny's again, but this time, he swept his tongue over Danny's mouth, licking at the seam, and when Danny gasped softly, Marshall did deepen the kiss, sliding his tongue into Danny's mouth, pleased when Danny responded the same way, allowing their tongues to meet and move together.
After a minute of taking pleasure in tasting him, Marshall forced himself to pull back. He was breathless and aroused, and his pulse raced. He wanted more. A lot more. Stuff that Danny was not going to be able to give him. Might never be able to give anyone.
"Oh shit." Danny's eyes went wide as he noticed his cock was hard again. He smashed his hand down on it as if trying to cover it or make it go away.
"Hey, no. Don't do that. That's what happens to men when something feels good. Look, I'm aroused too." He leaned back a bit so Danny could see his own tented sweatpants. "That kiss was amazing and this…" He gestured to his erection. "This just shows how much I liked kissing you. It's nothing to be upset by or scared of."
"But now you'll want to—"
Marshall cut him off before he could go any farther with the thought. "No! Never would I expect anything more than what you are willing to give me. That kiss was enough. It was amazing. I enjoyed every moment of kissing you, but that's where it ends. Yes, I'm aroused, but that doesn't mean I force myself on you or make you do things you don't want to do." He leaned back against the couch, giving Danny a bit more space. "It will go away in a few minutes, and if it doesn't, I'll go into the bathroom and take care of it myself." He had a feeling just the memory of the kiss would have him getting hard all night.
"Mine shouldn't have been like that." Danny groaned as he pressed his hand harder to his crotch.
"Did you not like kissing me?" Marshall asked.
"I liked it a lot."
"So why are you upset that your body is telling you that?" Marshall leaned over and moved Danny's hand from where it was covering his tented pants. "Just relax and it should too."
Danny sighed.
"You're a good kisser." Marshall tried to lighten the mood.
"You're a good teacher." Danny licked his lips as if thinking of the kiss. After a moment of silence, Danny glanced up at him. "Would you really go to the bathroom and make it go away?"
Marshall laughed. "Yeah. I've had to do that a time or two when I was really turned on. I usually don't admit it to the person who got me that way, but I think between us, I can be honest."
"So you just use your hand?"
Marshall nodded, making a fist as if he was doing it.
"Larry used to make me do that to him."
"He's not here. He never will be here. This is you and me. You're safe. Touching yourself isn't wrong. Everyone does it. It helps, and it's much better than cold showers."
Danny blushed. "Should I try it?"
Marshall fought back a groan at that visual. His own cock was still rock hard just from the conversation they were having. "If you want to."
Danny didn't move or say anything for a long time, then he glanced over at Marshall's tented pants. "Is it wrong of you to show me how you do it?"
Holy shit. He couldn't do this. He already felt like a pervert for doing what they had. Danny deserved better. Marshall hated how turned on this had him. He should have been refusing everything, not taking advantage of the situation for his own pleasure. "You want to watch me?" He swallowed hard.
"Is it wrong? Shouldn't I have asked?"
"It's not wrong. I'm just surprised by it. Are you sure that's what you want?"
"I think if I watch you, then I can think about you when I do it and not about me doing it to Larry. Like you said before, I need to make new memories." Danny's face was bright red.
Marshall needed to learn to keep his fucking mouth shut. Could he do this? Should he? He sure wanted to. That wasn't a question. Still, he felt like a pervert. Then again, it might be a good way to get Danny to learn to take care of his own needs and not wake up in a panic when it happened at night. He reminded himself that Danny was of age and only a few years younger than he was. This wasn't technically wrong. It was just badly timed. "I'll tell you what. Have you ever heard of a circle jerk?"
Danny shook his head.
"It's when friends do it together. They watch each other jerk off. We often did it as teenagers. How about we do it together. You don't have to touch me and I won't touch you, but this way you'll see that it's okay to touch yourself. It's safe to do it and no one is going to force you into doing anything more. If you don't want that, then we can both go into our bathrooms or bedrooms and do it alone." Marshall prayed they did it alone. He wasn't sure he could handle having Danny watch him. He'd probably come within two strokes if Danny's gaze was on him.
"Do you want to?" Danny asked.
"I've got to take care of this one way or another. It's not easing up for me with us talking about all of this. If I wasn't interested, I'd be soft by now." He gripped his cock through his pants, running his fist up the shaft.
Danny watched him intently then nodded. "I want to try together."
"Okay, but if you get uncomfortable or anything, we stop and go to our rooms, okay?"
Danny nodded.
Praying this wasn't the biggest mistake of his life, he pulled himself out of his pants. Once free, he released his cock, giving Danny a moment to look at it. He swore it hardened even more under his gaze.
Danny swallowed hard, then eased his pants down around his hips, lifting his ass slightly off the couch to push them down. His cock sprang free, but he didn't touch it.
Marshall nearly groaned at the size of it. If Danny had been anyone else, he would have leaned over, took him in his mouth, then after teasing him for a while, he would have begged to have Danny fuck him. He'd be a total slut to get a cock that size inside him.
Refocusing on what they were doing, Marshall eased back so he was leaning against the arm of the couch. He spread his legs a bit, then ran his palm over the head of his cock to gather the pre-cum. He debated on running to get lube, but worried if he got up, it would put a stop to everything that was happening. But that was what he wanted, wasn't it? He wanted Danny to go off alone and do this, right? Shamefully, he had to admit that he wanted this. He wanted to stare at Danny's cock and watch him come. Wanted Dan
ny to watch him.
Without thinking any more about it, Marshall started to stroke himself. He did this almost nightly and his hand moved naturally over him. He watched Danny, but Danny didn't even notice. His gaze was glued to Marshall's cock, his mouth parted, his eyes wide.
"Try it," Marshall said softly as he continued to work his fist over his length.
Danny wrapped his hand around his thick cock, looking nervous, but also fascinated as he watched Marshall's hand move. "You like doing this?"
"Yeah, I think most guys do." Marshall tried to imagine that huge cock trapped in a cage for over a year. It had to have been so painful at first before his body stopped getting hard. Marshall would cherish a cock like Danny's. He was such a size queen, but even without that, Danny deserved someone who would take care of him properly. God, he had to stop thinking this way, but as he watched Danny start to move his fist up and down his shaft, there was no stopping the want. Between this intense kissing, and now this, he was head over heels in lust with the man beside him. "Use the precum to coat your hand. Usually, I use lube, but I didn't want to leave you to grab it right now. You can also spit in your hand if you need to. That helps too." He took in the way Danny's hand didn't even close fully around the width of his cock. The bulbous head was pink and glistened at the tip. "So beautiful," Marshall sighed.
"This?" Danny's eyes widened.
"Yeah. Watching you do that is beautiful. Your cock is perfect." Marshall worked his cock a little faster. "The only thing better than watching what you're doing now will be watching when you come."
"You'd like that?" Danny looked confused.
"I'd love it. There would be nothing sexier." He used his other hand to reach down and cup his balls. "You make it hard for me to keep from coming quickly with how beautiful you are like this."
Danny's face flushed. "I never thought of anything like this as beautiful."
"When it's shared between people who care about each other, people who trust one another, it can be."
Danny didn't respond, but his fist seemed to tighten around himself a bit more, and his strokes were longer and faster.
Marshall bit his bottom lip, fighting to hold back the release that was already building in his balls. His cock was aching, his heart pounding, but he didn't want this to end quickly. He wanted to stay and enjoy this with Danny for as long as he could.
Danny parted his legs more, seeming to relax a little and possible start to enjoy what he was doing. He still looked nervous, but every now and then, Marshall caught a small gasp of pleasure come from him.
"That's it. Just find what you like. In time, you'll know exactly how to do this so you hit the sensitive places that will bring you the most pleasure." Marshall fought for control.
"What do you like?" Danny still stared at him, his gaze never leaving Marshall's cock.
"I like my thumb to graze over the tip with each stroke, and I like to give a little twist right under the head. I also like going as low as I can so I press my balls with each stroke, just enough to feel them shake a little. My balls are very sensitive. I can almost come just by playing with them."
"Are you close to coming?" Danny asked.
"Very. Do you want me to slow down?"
"No, I want to see it happen."
And Marshall wanted that too. Hearing Danny admit to it pushed his lust up another notch and he groaned, arching his head back a bit as he finally allowed himself to give Danny exactly what he asked for. He worked his cock as he had for years, bringing himself the kind of pleasure a person could only give themselves. It didn't take long before his eyes closed, his mouth opened, and his cock exploded. He grunted his release, unable to keep his hips from jerking up, his body from tightening, his world from tilting. "Ah fuck!" He kept moving his hand through the sticky mess, sliding it up and down until it became too sensitive to continue. With a long sigh of pleasure, he released his cock, his head falling back on the arm of the couch as he struggled to catch his breath.
"Wow." Danny's voice was barely a whisper.
Marshall forced his eyes open, needing to make sure Danny was okay with what he'd just witnessed. "Yeah, that was more than wow." He smiled but noticed Danny's own fist had stilled. "Are you okay?"
Danny's gaze lifted from Marshall's cock to his eyes. "Yeah." He took a shaky breath. "I think I liked watching you do that."
"Do I get to see you?" Marshall asked.
Danny looked down his fist still wrapped around his cock. "You really want to?"
He wanted much more than to watch, but for now, it would be enough. "Yeah, I do. I want to see you satisfied. I want you to feel that sex is good. Bringing yourself pleasure is good."
"I don't know if I can." Danny started to stroke himself again. His cock seemed to pulse under his fist, but Danny didn't show any sign that he was nearing orgasm. His actions looked more mechanical than anything.
Marshall took off his shirt and used it to clean himself up a bit before moving a little closer to Danny. "Think about something that turns you on. Close your eyes and see it."
"You. Kissing you turns me on." Danny was a little breathless, but it seemed more from the physical side of things, not the arousal.
"If I kiss you while you do that, will it help?" He didn't want to get too close and have Danny freak out, but he was more than happy to kiss him again if he'd let him.
"Maybe." Danny looked up at him. "Can we?"
"We can kiss anytime you want. I'll never tell you no to kissing." He reached out slowly, drawing his fingers down Danny's cheek. "I like kissing you. Now don't stop doing what you're doing. When you come, I want to feel it in the kiss."
Danny gasped, but Marshall didn't give him time to react more. He bent in and kissed him hard, not taking the time to go slow like they had before, but jumping right in, demanding to taste his mouth. With a simple sweep of his tongue, he was inside and everything was right in his world. Marshall groaned in pleasure as he held onto Danny's shoulders, but stayed back enough so he didn't get in the way of his fist as it continued to pump.
With his own body still humming from his release, he was aware of everything, from the way Danny's breathing hitched at times, to the feel of Danny's free hand holding on to his bicep as if it was a lifeline. He was also aware of the scent of Danny's arousal and it made him hungry, wanting so much more than he could ever allow.
They kissed passionately, their lips soft, then hard, teasing and playing against each other. He explored Danny's mouth, tasting him, learning him, finding out what Danny liked and didn't by the way he reacted to the kiss.
"I can't. It hurts." Danny pulled back.
"Your cock?"
"The arousal. It's like I'm so close to something, then it just holds there."
Marshall smiled. "I know what you're feeling. You're almost there."
"I can't do it anymore. It won't work."
Marshall kissed him softly. "It's okay. You're not letting yourself relax. You're probably overstimulated by all the new feelings." He brushed a stray strand of hair back from Danny's face. "Can I help you?"
Danny's eyes widened. "How?"
"Sometimes having someone else touch us helps make it easier, better." He watched Danny's face closely for signs of fear. He shouldn't be offering what he was, but he couldn't leave him to go take another cold shower. He wanted Danny to understand that sex was pleasurable and not something to be scared of. "Can I touch you?"
Danny stiffened in his arms.
"Just the way you were touching yourself. Nothing more than that. I just want you to feel the pleasure I felt. I want you to enjoy this, not be upset by it."
"We can try." Danny released his cock.
Marshall kissed him again before pulling back. "I'll be gentle. Are you healed? Does anywhere on it hurt?"
Danny shook his head. "All healed."
"Good." Marshall kissed him again as he slid his hand lower, finding Danny's cock with ease. He wrapped his hand around it, amazed at the thickness, hungry for
it. He gently started to stroke him, teasing the head to draw out more precum to coat his palm. He never stopped kissing Danny, hoping to overpower him with stimulation to keep him from thinking too much about everything that was happening. He worked his fist in a steady rhythm, while teasing his lips with his own, sometimes whispering to him, telling him how sexy and beautiful he was. How good he felt in his hand. His own cock hardened again, but he ignored it. This was all about Danny. He liked feeling Danny's body move with him, the occasional thrust of hips, the way his stomach muscles seemed to tighten at times. He swore he was close, but just when Marshall thought Danny was there, the desire seemed to fade again.
What was he thinking? What was keeping him from allowing himself to go over the edge? Was it Larry or something Larry had done? He prayed it was that and not something he was doing wrong. After nearly ten minutes of stroking him, Marshall pulled back a bit, his fist still tightly wrapped around Danny. "Can I try something else?
"What?"
"Will you let me taste you?"
Danny pulled back a bit. "You don't want to—"
"Oh, yes I do. Very much so. I have from the moment I saw you hard in bed the other night. It's one of my favorite things to do, and I'd be honored to do it with you."
"But it's not enjoyable for you."
"It is. Remember, what you have done in the past wasn't how things should be. Let me show you the right way."
Danny stared at him, looking confused and a little scared. "He used to use that for punishment."
"Let me show you how to use it for pleasure, okay? We can stop at any time if you don't like it."
Danny nodded. "What do I do?"
"You just relax. You don't move. Let me do all the work. I want you to lay back, watch me please you, and when it's time, I want you to come in my mouth so I can taste you."
Danny closed his eyes.
"Do you not want this?"
"I just don't see how you'll enjoy it."
"Let me show you." Marshall got on his knees on the floor and positioned himself so he was between Danny's legs. He reached up, fisting the base of his cock, then watching Danny's face closely, he lowered his mouth to him, sliding his cock between his lips as he teased his tongue around the head.