by Liz King
“You deserve so much better than him, sweet cheeks. I love you, and I want you to be happy.” Sly tugs on my shoulder and pulls me closer to him.
I lean into Sly’s embrace. “I know you love me. I love you too. Connor is what is going to make me happy. Him and the baby.”
Sly sighs and leans his head back against the couch, looking up at the ceiling. “I don’t trust him.”
“But you should trust me. You’ve known me forever and a day.”
“I do trust you.”
“So listen to me when I tell you that you should give Connor a chance. He is going to be in my life. He is going to be part of my future. Don’t make me choose. That’s not fair.” I hope he doesn’t ask me to choose. That is an impossible decision. Choose between the man that has been my rock for so long, or the man I want in my future… not an option.
Sly picks his head back up and rests it on top of mine. “I love you too much to try to make you pick. I don’t trust him and I don’t like him.” He sighs. “If he ever, and I mean ever, hurts you in any way, I will kill him. I will rip him limb from limb and shove them each down his throat.”
“And that’s why I love you.” I sling my other arm around Sly and hug him tightly.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I was so worried about the possibility of this irrevocably damaging our friendship. I don’t know if I could have handled that. I’m glad that Sly has moved to Charleston. Hopefully having him here will help repair the giant gaping hole that divides him and Connor. I desperately want them to get along. Before everything happened, it really looked like they could have become great friends. I hope it isn’t too late.
I get up from the couch and head into my bedroom.
“Where are you going now?” Sly asks.
I look back over my shoulder. “I’m just packing up some clothes. I’m going to stay a few more days with Connor.” I smile weakly. The hurt look in Sly’s eyes tells me that he was hoping to spend some time with me. “He just wants to keep an eye on me since we had the scare with the baby.”
“And I can’t keep an eye on you? I’ll be living here for a while, you know. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of you.”
“I know that, hun. Connor and I are working on us right now. And to do that, we need to be together. Okay?”
“Yeah, sure.” Sly mumbles before heading into the guestroom. I think I hear him say “I just don’t want to lose my best friend” on his way through the door.
I follow him into the room and watch as he flops onto the bed face down. Sitting down beside him, I rub his back. Sly turns his face to look at me.
“You’re not going to lose me. I will always be your girl. I will always love you.” I squeeze his shoulder.
Sly rolls over on his side so that he is facing me completely. “Lynae, I always knew there would be someone to come along and sweep you off your feet and then you would live happily ever after. I wanted the fairytale for you. Not this crazy broken road that you seem to have taken.”
“Life isn’t all fairytales and rainbows, Sly. I know that. I’ve lived it. It’s taken me so long to get over it. It may be a broken road that has gotten me here, but I’m here all the same.” I lie down next to Sly. “You’ve always been my knight in shining armor riding into protect me from everything. You’ve always been there to catch me when I fall, and I know that you always will be there. But I have Connor now and I want to make things work with him.”
Sly lets out a sigh. “I get it, baby girl. I do. It’s just going to take some time for me to forgive him. And get used to the idea of you not needing me as much.” He leans forward and kisses my forehead. “I’ll see you later this week?”
“Yeah. I’m going to stay at Connor’s this week, but this weekend, you and I need a day. I’ve missed you, and I really am glad you’ve moved out here.”
“Me too. I get to see you whenever I want to, and things with Michelle are going really well. I wanna see where this goes.” Sly gets a wistful look in his eyes when he mentions my other best friend.
“I’m so happy for you two. It’s been a long time coming for you to get your heads out of your asses.” I nudge him before sitting back up on the bed.
I get up and head to my room to gather my things as I hear him let out a little laugh. I hope I’ve reassured Sly that he isn’t losing me. He could never lose me. He means too much to me for me to ever want our friendship to end. I know things are going to be rough between him and Connor for a while; I just hope they can move past all of this.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Connor
I hate that Lynae went back to work a couple days ago. I want to keep her here all day long. That way I can go upstairs and see her, hold her and kiss her anytime I want to. Falling asleep and waking up with her in my arms is something I never imagined I’d be able to have again. I love her more than anything in this world.
We’ve talked more about Kaitlin. I’ve told her everything. Every painful detail and every hurtful word my parents have thrown at me. After letting it all out, it feels as if a giant weight has been lifted off my chest. I feel like I can completely breathe. I’m beginning to accept that I can’t hold myself fully responsible for losing Kaitlin. I still think I will always carry some guilt. I shouldn’t have been thinking with my dick, but I can’t change the fact that she chose to leave with Rob. I wish my last words to her weren’t a drunken brush off, but I can’t change that. I can only pray that Kaitlin knows how much I love her and miss her. Lynae insists that she does. She tells me that I should talk to her, and that she talks to her mom all the time. I guess I will try one day. I’m not ready to go there yet.
I’m sitting at the kitchen island fixing myself some lunch when I hear the door open behind me. “Hey man, got a minute to talk?” Seth asks.
Seth and I are still warming back up to each other. Our friendship is still there, but we seem to be teetering around the elephant in the room. Lynae. “Yeah, what’s up?” I set the bread and knife down. I still feel like causing him physical pain when I think about the time he got to spend with Lynae while she wasn’t talking to me, but I have to remember that she’s mine. We are together and she loves me. Nothing is going to change that.
Seth pulls out the barstool next to me and leans his elbows on the counter. “How’s Lynae and Jellybean doing?”
Okay, that’s the second time he’s referred to jellybean, whatever that is. “Lynae is fine, she’s at work. She’ll be home in a few hours,” I respond as Seth nods his head. “Who is Jellybean exactly?”
Seth smiles and looks down. “Oh. I, um… That’s sorta what Lynae and I’ve been calling the baby,” he says meekly. “I got confused about what candy and shit she’s obsessed with and, well, I just started calling the baby Jellybean since it doesn’t have a name yet.”
I’m not sure I like the idea that Seth and Lynae had been sharing this special bonding shit about my baby, but there really isn’t anything I can do about it. I look up at the picture from the latest ultrasound on the fridge and I notice that it does look like a little jellybean. I would have thought ‘peanut’ or some shit like that, but I can see where they got the name.
“The baby is fine. The ultrasounds on Friday and Saturday looked good. She doesn’t get another for a couple months yet.”
“Are we cool, Connor?”
I take a deep breath and let it out. “As long as we are clear that you aren’t going to try to come between me and my girl, we’re cool.”
“Look, I never meant to move in on her. I don’t think I even realized I was doing it. I can’t help how I feel about her, but I swear I’m not gonna interfere. I can tell how much she’s in love with you. As much I as I want to, I’m won’t act on my feelings for Lynae.” Seth runs his hand through his hair. “I just want to get back to the way things were. I want my friend back.”
“Oh lawd. Are we having a Lifetime movie moment here?” Marcus comes into the kitchen, laughing. “Did I miss the big
heartfelt hug?” He starts clapping his hands. “Cue the slow applause!”
I roll my eyes at Marcus and see Wade standing in the doorway of the stairwell laughing so hard he has tears coming out of his eyes. Seth grunts and shoves away from the bar and flips them off. “Fuck off, you bastards.”
Wade moves to stand in front of us and clasps both of us on the shoulder. “No, man. It’s time for the group hug! I want in on this!” And he drags us in.
I can’t help but laugh at Wade. I give Wade as much of a manly back slap hug as I can in the position he has pulled me into. It feels like all the tension that had been building up has broken.
“Yeah, dude. We’re all good,” I say to Seth.
Wade steps back and then walks to plop down on the couch. “So, I’m glad you and Seth finally got your shit together. I was sick of pussyfooting around everything,” he calls out. “We can get back to the way things were. Get our asses back on stage.”
I never thought to think about how the rift between us was affecting everyone else. Shameful Regret hasn’t performed in weeks. I’ve been cancelling our scheduled sets because my heart just wasn’t in it and I knew I wouldn’t be able to deliver my best performance. I didn’t want to deal with being on stage and not seeing Lynae out there watching me. Even though there are tons of girls out there trying to get our attention, when my sweetness is there, she’s all I could see. All I wanted to see.
“Yeah, we need to call Rich and see when he can get us squeezed into Metro’s schedule or see what other clubs we can get booked.” I look at Marcus as I move into the living room to join Wade. He’s usually the one that handles the business end of the band. He’s got the mind and the smooth talking abilities to get us the best days and fees.
Marcus and Seth make their way into the living room as well. Seth plops down on the floor and sprawls out while Marcus claims his usual spot in the beat up recliner next to the couch.
“So, when is Nae gonna be back? I haven’t seen her since Friday afternoon,” Marcus says.
The guys, other than Wade, haven’t hung out at the apartment in the afternoons. I’ve been telling them that Lynae needed her rest and that she would be tired after working all day. To be honest, I just wanted her to myself. Wade and Gabbi usually disappeared into his room after dinner the one night he stayed here, or just went back to Gabbi’s. Takeout is getting old, and I know that kind of processed food can’t be good for Lynae or the baby, but I haven’t let her cook. She texted me this morning that she was going to the store to pick up some stuff to make stir-fry tonight because she wanted a “home-cooked” meal for a change.
“She’ll be back in a few hours. Stubborn woman wants to go to the store before she gets home.”
Wade perks up at the mention of the word ‘store.’ “Is she finally gonna cook for us again?” he asks like a kid that just heard the ice cream truck. “I swear, that’s the worst thing that has come out of you two breaking up.”
Shit. Him not getting fed is the worst thing? Fuck no. Having my heart ripped out and handed to me on a platter, feeling like my very reason for living and breathing was taken from me… now that’s the worst thing. “She ain’t cooking for you dumb asses.”
My phone chimes in my pocket alerting me of a text:
Lynae: Hey baby. Are the guys gonna be home for dinner tonight? Leaving work now and stopping off at Walmart. Need to make sure I’m picking up enough. Love you.
I shake my head. Of course she would want to try to take care of us. The last two days have been the best she’s felt, according to her, since the start of the pregnancy. I really just want her to come home, put her feet up and let me order out again. I want to take care of her. But I know she won’t agree to that. Once she gets a thought in her head, she sticks to it.
Me: I want to say no and keep you all to myself, but they were actually just talking about how much they miss your cooking. Love you too, sweetness.
“Speak of the sexy devil.” I say to the guys. “Sweetness is on her way home. And she asked if y’all were gonna stick around for dinner. Guess you get your wish, Wade.” I smile, thinking about the fact that she referred to my place as home. I want her to move in with me. I know it’s probably a little too fast for her, but I want her here all the time. I’m going to marry this woman. I won’t take “no” for an answer.
A series of “hell yeahs” are the response I get. I go back to the kitchen to finish making my sandwich and eat it quickly. I need to return to the garage downstairs so I can get the rest of the work done so I can be up here helping Lynae when she gets home. If she is going to be cooking for these idiots, I’m not going to make her do it alone. I don’t want her wearing herself out.
~
The sound of female laughter fills my kitchen as Gabbi and Lynae work on cleaning up the dishes from dinner. They’re talking about their day at work and I have no clue what the hell any of it means.
“Yeah, and the tach was incessant. I swear every single time I hit the pace button, it showed up,” Lynae says while she rinses a plate before putting it in the dishwasher.
Gabbi giggles. “I kept telling Travis to quit fucking around and just burn the damn pathway. It was obviously AVNRT.”
“I know! Any idiot could see that. He just wanted to play with the new mapping system some more.”
Wade walks up behind the girls and wraps his arms around their shoulders. “You know, when you use all that medical speak, it does things to me,” and he thrusts his hips between them.
“Wade!” Lynae shrieks and slaps him on the chest. “You are horrible!” She giggles. “I don’t know what Gabbi sees in you!”
“Oh, I can show you, baby.” He reaches down for the buckle on his belt. “I don’t think your man would approve though.”
I quickly run into the kitchen and grab Lynae carefully around the waist and carry her back to the living room. “You keep your junk away from my woman!” I growl at him. I know he’s only kidding. But I wouldn’t put it past him to actually whip his dick out, Wade is a perv.
Lynae is giggling and Gabbi is scolding Wade. It’s finally starting to feel like it was before everything went to shit and I fucking love it.
When I set Lynae back down on her feet she spins in my arms and stands up on her tiptoes to kiss my chin. “I love you, baby.”
“I love you too.” I kiss her nose. “You go sit down and put your feet up. I’ll finish cleaning.”
Lynae gives me that sweet smile that can melt my heart and turns to go sit on the couch with Seth. I watch them curiously. They didn’t talk much during dinner, but they seemed a little more at ease with each other. Lynae curls up in the corner of the couch facing Seth and he scoots closer to her. She reaches out her hand and he takes it, squeezes it briefly, then lets go.
“I’m glad you and Connor are working things out. He needs you,” I hear Seth tell her. “Are we okay?”
“Yeah, I want us to be okay. You were really becoming one of my best friends. I don’t want to lose that.” She smiles at him. “I do love you, Seth. I want you to know that. Just not the way I love Connor.”
“I know that, babe.” Seth’s voice sounds a little thick with emotion. “Now, your man said to put your feet up, so be a good little girl and do as you’re told.” He clears his throat before getting up off the couch and arranging a pillow under Lynae’s feet and propping them up.
Marcus comes to stand beside me and bumps my shoulder. “Things are going to be fine. They’re just friends. I think she needs us as much as we need her,” he says, referring to them and her. She does need to have their friendship. They have shown her that not all guys are total douchebags and she can trust them. These guys have been my family for so long, and I am planning on Lynae becoming a permanent part of my family as well.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Lynae
“So where do you want to go for lunch?” I ask Sly as he pulls out of the parking lot of my apartment complex. I had breakfast with Connor this morning and told h
im I was coming back home to spend some much needed time with Sly. We need some time to talk things over and to ensure the friendship we have built over the years doesn’t change or end just because I’m moving on with my life.
Sly shrugs his shoulders and gives me a sideways look. “I don’t care. Whatever you feel like you can handle. Don’t know what foods are good for you and what makes you sick.”
He was very standoffish this morning when I got home. We texted and talked on the phone every night this week, and I even tried to get him to come over to Connor’s for dinner, but he refused. I need to work this out.
“How about we just go to La Hacienda? I could really go for some enchiladas and some queso,” I suggest. I am craving something spicy and Sly will eat just about anything. We can even get some takeout to bring back to Michelle. That girl can eat her weight in burritos if you let her. La Hacienda is a quiet locally owned restaurant that makes truly authentic Mexican dishes.
Sly smiles and nods his consent as he drives in the direction of the restaurant.
After we’re seated and the waitress brings us a big basket of tortilla chips with salsa and takes our orders, I decide I’m not going to mess around. I’m going to cut straight to what needs to be said.
“Okay, Sly. Spill it. No more keeping it in. You have something you want to say to me, say it. I love you, and I can take whatever it is you have to throw at me.” I lean back in the booth and cross my arms over my chest.
Sly mirrors my posture and takes a deep breath. Glancing over my shoulder, he releases it before looking back at me. “I told you earlier this week I will support you in whatever decision you make when it comes to Connor. I want you to be happy, but it will just take a while for me to fully trust him again.”
“I know he has to earn your trust, but like I said earlier this week, since you trust me, you need to also trust my judgment.” I reach across the table and hold my hand out for him.