The Ex Files

by Victoria Christopher Murray

  do you think God would be mad at me if i were to do this?

  4choice: Not at all. God brings you into this world, but He gives you free will. That means we can make our own choices—on how to live and then how to die.

  Vanessa read those words over and over. She’d never heard that before, but 4choice’s words had to mean something. She didn’t bring up God, her friends did. And she knew how God worked—through people. Maybe this was His way of finally reaching out. Maybe this was the message she’d been waiting to hear.

  4choice: Is that what you’re worried about? Is it because of God that you haven’t done what you want to do?

  lonenla: i just think i have to do this the right way. i’ve been waiting for a message from Him.

  4choice: Well, here’s your message. God wants you to be happy. And you have to make the choice on how best to be happy. God decides your beginning, but you can choose your end.

  The tears that rolled down her cheeks this time had nothing to do with sadness. God was finally talking to her.

  She clicked off the computer without logging off and settled in the quiet dark for a while. It had taken weeks, but she finally had her message, His permission. On the one-month date of Reed’s death. Now all she had to do was decide when her date would be.

  Chapter Thirty-nine

  ASIA

  It was clear—she’d been going about this the wrong way. But now Asia had it together. These women were her assets.

  She heard their muffled voices as she stood outside the Learning Center. They were probably talking about her. She needed to turn this around. Tonight.

  Her reflection in the glass door showed that she’d made a good start. For the last few weeks she’d worn her designer clothes, her diamond accessories, making sure she set herself high above these commoners. But tonight she wore jeans, albeit a pair that had cost Bobby well over three hundred dollars. “Hey, ladies,” she said as she strolled inside. “How’s everybody?”

  They twisted toward her. Then stared, as if there was a stranger among them. Asia slid into her seat. Still they looked at her as if she’d landed from another planet.

  “What?” she asked, when not one of them made a move. “Aren’t we having our prayer meeting?”

  “Yeah, we are,” Sheridan said. “But who are you?”

  Asia laughed. “I know. I know.” She held up her hands. “I haven’t been the happiest chick on the block.” She leaned back and crossed her legs. “But I realized that my aunt was right. This is a good thing—for all of us.”

  Sheridan smiled as she sat down. “What brought this on?”

  Asia shrugged. “I came to my senses. I’m one of those smart girls from Compton, you know.”

  “Compton?” Kendall and Vanessa said at the same time.

  “Yeah.” Asia responded with attitude. It wasn’t often that she told anyone where she was raised. She’d left that part of her history behind when she’d met Bobby.

  “You’re from Compton?” Kendall asked.

  “What about it?” Asia said, losing the cheer that she’d walked in with. She was ready to throw down if Kendall jumped in her face about Compton.

  Kendall laughed. “Keep your panties on, little girl. I’m from Compton too.”

  Asia’s eyes narrowed. “You’re from Compton?” She looked Kendall up and down. “Get out.”

  Vanessa said, “I’m from Compton, too.”

  Kendall and Asia sang “Get out” together.

  Vanessa nodded.

  “I cannot believe this,” Asia said, raising her hand to give Kendall a high five. “My homies.” Then the three turned to Sheridan.

  She held up her hands. “Sorry.”

  Sheridan chuckled. By the looks on their faces, she couldn’t tell if they felt sorry for her or were disappointed. She said, “The man I’m seeing lives in Compton. Does that count?”

  “Get out,” Kendall said, “Your man lives in Compton?”

  “Get out,” Asia said. “You got a man?”

  They all laughed.

  “Yes,” Sheridan said. “I have a man,” she paused, as if she had to think about it for a moment. “I have a man,” she repeated, “and he lives in Compton.”

  “Well, it looks like we have something else in common besides loving the Lord,” Vanessa said.

  “Yeah,” Asia said, “We’re four girls from Compton.” She looked at Sheridan. “Well, three and a half.”

  Again they laughed.

  “Okay, enough jokes about me,” Sheridan said. “So, I guess I don’t have to ask how everyone’s doing. Is there anything anyone wants to share?”

  Kendall said, “I liked what we did last week. It felt good to pray.” She paused, looked at the ladies. “And it felt good to pray for you.”

  “I agree,” Vanessa said. “Praying for all of you took the focus from me and now I really know how to proceed with my life.”

  Asia added, “Yeah, praying for each other worked for me, too. It kept my focus on my daughter.”

  Sheridan leaned forward. “How are things with Angel?”

  Time to plant more seeds. “She’s still unusually quiet.”

  “Have you checked with her school?” Sheridan asked.

  “Her teachers say she’s fine.” Asia shrugged. “Maybe I’m imagining things.”

  “I don’t have any children,” Vanessa started, “but I know this—trust yourself. If you think there’s something going on with your daughter, don’t second-guess. Find out what it is.” She took Asia’s hand and squeezed it.

  “Yeah, and I’ll keep praying for her covering. You know God will protect her,” Kendall said.

  Outside, Asia kept her face drawn, serious. But inside, she smiled. “Thank you. I appreciate your prayers.”

  “That’s what we’re here for,” Sheridan said.

  “Really? I thought we were here to complain about our exes.” Kendall chuckled.

  “Well, that too,” Sheridan said.

  “Ladies, I got lots of complaints,” Kendall said.

  “I know that’s right,” Asia said.

  Even Vanessa laughed.

  Asia leaned back as the banter continued. She’d walked into this meeting with a plan, but it didn’t look like she was going to need to manipulate much. All she had to do was be herself and these women would love her. Next, they would stand by her side if she needed them.

  Last week, she couldn’t wait for the meeting to be over. But now, these meetings could go on forever. Or at least go on until her plan with Bobby worked.

  “It’s so nice to be here with all of you,” Vanessa said. “I guess we’re doing what Pastor said. We’re finally bonding.”

  Sheridan nodded. “Praying for each other will do that.”

  “Well, I feel closer to all of you,” Vanessa said.

  “Just because we’re from Compton?” Asia laughed.

  “Yes, that. But it’s much more. I’ll never be able to thank you all enough.”

  Asia smiled. There was something about Vanessa tonight—she looked wonderful; glowed with peace. Hopefully, after a few more weeks in the prayer group, she’d dress better, too.

  Asia rested her glance on each of the women and leaned back in her chair, satisfied. She was sure of it now—Bobby Johnson didn’t stand a chance—he was going down.

  Chapter Forty

  VANESSA

  “My goodness,” Wanda exclaimed the moment she opened the door.

  “Hello, Mother.” Vanessa kissed Wanda’s cheek before she stepped into the home where she’d lived with her mother until she’d married. She didn’t travel much to Compton; it just seemed too far from Inglewood. But each time she made her way south on the freeway, she wondered why she didn’t come home more often.

  “What are you doing here? And it’s certainly about time that you came to visit.”

  She remembered why she stayed away.

  “Are you all right?” Wanda exchanged her surprise with a frown.

  Vanessa nodded. “Ye
ah, I’m fine.” She wandered around the room’s perimeter, stepping into the time capsule that it was.

  For most of her life, it had been just she and her mother; she had little memory of her father, who died when she was five. Even though she never doubted Wanda’s love, it wasn’t enough. She’d grown up with a wounded heart, a hole in her center where love from her father was supposed to be. Even as a little girl she knew that she deserved to be loved, by at least one man in her lifetime.

  And then she met Reed.

  “So, are you going to tell me why you’re here?”

  There was not a word Wanda could utter that would irritate Vanessa today. “I wanted to see you.”

  Finally Wanda granted her daughter a smile. “Well, I’m glad to see you.” She lowered herself onto the sofa and patted a space next to her. “Come sit, let’s visit.”

  Vanessa smoothed her dress before she eased onto the plastic-covered couch.

  “You look well.”

  “I feel great, Mother. I really do.”

  “You don’t know how good that makes me feel. I’ve been so worried.” The smile left her face. “I know how hard it is.” She sniffed.

  “Mother, it’s all right.” Vanessa slipped her hand into Wanda’s. “You don’t have to worry anymore.”

  “I’ll always worry. As long as you’re my daughter. And that’s going to be for a very long time.”

  Now Vanessa’s smile was gone. Leaving Wanda behind was her only regret.

  “Well, dear, I’ve already eaten, but I made a roast.” She pushed herself up. “I’ll fix you a plate.”

  “No, Mother, I can’t. I have a meeting.”

  Wanda frowned.

  “A prayer meeting…at church.”

  “Really.” Wanda returned to the sofa. “You are doing better. Have you gone back to work?”

  “Not yet.” She turned her eyes away, let her glance roam through the room once more. “But I will soon. I just wanted to come by for a moment. I have to go now.”

  “Well, make sure you tell your pastor I said hello.”

  “I will.” Vanessa took a breath. “Mother, the key I gave you—I need to get it back.”

  Wanda groaned. “You’re still upset with me about that?”

  “No, I’m not.”

  “All I’m guilty of is trying to take care of you. All I did was cook dinner.”

  “Mother, I’m not upset.”

  “Then why would you ask your own mother to return a key to your home?”

  “Because…” The anguish imprinted on Wanda’s face made her stop. “You know what, Mother. I don’t need the key.”

  Wanda’s frown melted. “I promise I’ll always call first.”

  Vanessa stood. “I’d better get to the meeting.”

  “Now that you’re feeling better, maybe we can spend a bit more time together.”

  “That would be nice.” Vanessa took a final glance around the room where she’d watched The Cosby Show, Diff’rent Strokes, and Miami Vice. Where she’d listened to Michael Jackson, Kool and the Gang, and Prince. The room where she’d loved life the most—until she met Reed. By the time she turned back to her mother, tears had taken their place in her eyes.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing, Mother.” She hugged Wanda, imprinting the memory of her feel, her scent in her mind.

  Wanda said, “Take care; I love you, sweetheart.”

  It took the strength of a champion to hold back her sobs. “I love you, too, Mama.” She kissed her mother’s cheek and then turned away, before Wanda could see the distress on her daughter’s face that told the story of what was to come.

  Chapter Forty-one

  ASIA

  “I really appreciate this,” Asia said as Bobby stepped into the apartment, his hands filled with an oversized stuffed bear. “I didn’t know if you could get away on a Saturday night.”

  “No problem. Caroline’s in Dallas.” He paused, waiting for her reaction. When Asia said nothing, he continued, “Where’s Angel?”

  “In her room. I didn’t tell her you were coming by, in case…” She stopped, her unspoken words hanging in the air.

  Bobby frowned. “In case what, Asia?”

  She held up her hands. “I didn’t mean anything. It’s just that you haven’t been by to see her as often as you said you would.”

  “I was busy at the station last week.”

  “No problem.”

  “No, it is a problem. I made a promise to see Angel a couple of times a week and now that I’m getting settled, I’ll be by more.”

  She smiled. That’s what she needed. Consistency. “Thanks. And I also want to thank you for the settlement. I got the papers and signed them. I’m glad you’re recognizing Angel legally.”

  “She’s my daughter.”

  “And the money for me…” She’d been impressed with the way Bobby set that up. An irreversible trust fund that fit perfectly into her plan.

  “You deserved that, Asia. You earned it.” She flinched and he added quickly, “What I mean is—”

  She held up her hand. “It’s fine.”

  His glance inched over her and his eyes shined—he appreciated the leather bustier and pants she wore. “Where’re you going? Got a big date?”

  She crossed her arms, said nothing.

  He grinned and moved toward the staircase.

  “Wait, I’ll call her down.” Asia picked up her jacket. “I want to say good night.”

  Only a few seconds passed before Angel came dashing down the steps. “Daddy!”

  “Hey, pumpkin.” Bobby knelt to embrace his daughter, and pecked her on the lips.

  Angel wrapped her arms around his neck. “Is that for me?” She pointed to the stuffed animal.

  “Yup. And guess what? I’m going to stay with you tonight while Mommy goes out.”

  “Where are you going, Mommy?”

  “Out.” She kissed her daughter. “Have a good time and I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

  Angel nodded.

  “Thanks again, Bobby.” Asia grabbed her purse and reached for the door. Before she stepped into the hallway, she turned back to see Bobby lifting Angel and squeezing her tight.

  Over his shoulder, Angel grinned at her mother.

  Asia’s eyebrows folded into a deep frown. She shook her head slightly and waited until Angel’s smile went away. When her daughter’s expression matched her own, Asia closed the door.

  The thick-necked bouncer at Chaos waved at Noon and pulled aside the velvet rope. Noon and Asia shifted through the body-pressed-against-body crowd, and Asia resisted the urge to cover her ears from the blasting music.

  “Do you want a mojito?” Noon yelled, once they stood at the bar.

  Asia shook her head; she’d called Noon and made arrangements to meet her, but getting her party on was not part of the agenda. As she waited, she surveyed the club’s scene. It was amazing, the way Chaos still stood after ten years. This had been one of their every-weekend hangouts when it first opened. Back then they’d used fake IDs to gain entry. Now, years later, Chaos was the same—teeming with twenty-something-year-old women clad in dresses that fit like skin, jiggling their silicone chests in the faces of twenty-, thirty-, forty-year-old men who flashed thick wallets, willing to pay mucho dinero for that one-night hookup.

  With her drink in hand, Noon squeezed through the sweaty bodies, beckoning Asia to follow, until they stood in the corner.

  “So,” Noon began, “what brings you out tonight?”

  Asia shrugged. “Just trying to move on.”

  “That’s a good thing.” Noon snapped her fingers as Usher belted out, “Yeah, yeah, yeah!” “Get the cash and move on. You’ll find a new mark soon. Probably one with lots more money than Bobby.”

  I ain’t sayin’ she’s a gold digger….

  “Heeeyyyy,” Noon sang, bobbing her head to the beat, “that’s my soooong.” She raised her glass above her head and dipped her hips. A guy in a cobalt-blue suit th
at shined, eased behind Noon and swiveled his hips in rhythm with hers. Without a word exchanged, the two sashayed onto the parquet floor.

  Asia’s sigh was filled with exhaustion, but she had to stay well past the other side of midnight to work her plan.

  “You look exactly like what I need at home.”

  Asia didn’t bother to turn around to see who’d delivered that sorry line. She folded her arms, kept her eyes on the bodies gyrating to Kanye and Jamie.

  “Oh, you’re one of dem sistahs. Because you’re light-skinded you think you’re too good. Well, let me tell you—”

  Asia stepped away before the name calling began because she didn’t know what she would do if one of these men called her out of her name tonight.

  I don’t belong here. This time her sigh was one of longing. She wished for the time when her life was filled with Bobby. He’d taken her away from this, but now she was back—because of him. Still, even as she exacted her plan for revenge, she wanted him. She wanted him as much now as she had then….

  Seventeen-year-old Chiquita hadn’t been able to focus on the rest of the Lakers game once Jamal told her about the party for the rookies. Her mind bounced with ideas.

  The next day, Chiquita rushed home to the computer Aunt Beverly had given her. Within minutes, she was perusing articles featuring the Lakers. She zoomed in on the single ones—she was going to have her own man.

  Pages of information told her all she wanted to know. But it was the photographs that fascinated her. The Lakers were pictured at games and other events—with their wives and with their women. Within minutes, Chiquita was able to pick out the wives from the others. The wives wore an aura—they donned their class and confidence like expensive accessories to their designer suits.

  Chiquita had risen from her desk, turned to the mirror, and began to see her own magnificence. She was exactly the kind of woman these men seemed to want. Finally, her fair skin and hair that curled with the humidity was going to deliver something more than the taunting and teasing that had beset her during her childhood years.

  That night, Chiquita never closed her eyes. Her plan had been to find a boyfriend, but the truth was, she was born to be a wife.