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Funeral Diva

Page 7

by Pamela Sneed


  and Forest Whitaker in the film The Last King of Scotland, when he played him.

  And to see it is again

  at rallies, at protests, they show the coat hangers and crude instruments

  women were forced to use in back alley abortions

  We say never again but taking away women’s choice

  and Planned Parenthood, it is again.

  Today started out in an argument with someone

  who didn’t understand why I mentioned race so much

  in my new book

  and that white man is not the first/a Black woman

  asked too.

  I wanted to scream HELLO haven’t you seen the news

  Didn’t you see what happened to Stephon Clark

  unarmed and shot in the back six times by police

  And who even cares what happens to women

  Black lesbians, lesbians of color

  There’s no public outcry.

  A student once wrote to me in an academic paper

  that a parent forced her to stop playing sports

  because they said sports made her more of a dyke

  It killed my student inside because she was an athlete

  So the white guy I argued with about my book

  said he was just giving me some good advice

  from his experience as an empath

  I said I don’t need your advice

  I have reasons for talking about race and gender in the interpersonal

  He said he was just trying to help me.

  I’ll offer this nonsequitur

  Winnie Mandela died a few years ago

  She had great impact on me

  I read she was nobility

  But then the difference between her and how Princess Diana was treated

  Everyone accepted and loved Diana’s silent/passive status

  She was allowed to be gorgeous

  No one ever associated her with that colonial stain

  There are moments in the recent Winnie Mandela documentary

  that stand out to me

  where she buried her face in her hands and screamed out

  I’ve been betrayed

  the other moment was when she said she was

  the only ANC member brought to TRC

  and made to testify

  Nelson Mandela forgave a nation

  but he could never forgive her.

  What was done to Winnie is done to other Black women

  and working artists

  Black women fighting to give language/resistance

  but it only matters when a celebrity says or does it.

  At Cape Coast Castle in Ghana after you’ve passed

  The Door of No Return

  there is a plaque donated to the Castle by Black tribal elders

  It reads:

  May we never sell ourselves into slavery again

  But it is Again.

  UNTITLED

  Say what you want about my mother/I know

  her cruelty knew no bounds

  neglect

  never a warm hug

  kind word

  every year when school came/fall

  I looked at the flyers of back-to-school clothes

  Nothing

  I wore rags/hand-me-downs

  As soon as I worked she made me pay rent

  and that was the message engraved into me

  instead of being taught responsibility

  I was taught I owed

  her rent

  the ground I stood on and had no rights

  My father’s neglect

  The patches put over his eyes

  not to see

  never a book

  nothing

  She suffered from mental illness

  was selfish

  Through blinds

  Through stories I get glimpses

  Say what you want but she is the greatest fighter

  She is going now

  She cobbles out a life from the women she watches on housewives shows

  Their competition

  Her neighbor buys a wreath

  My mother buys a bigger one

  She tells my father when I visit

  Strike up the barbeque

  She buys corn

  pretends it’s a party

  I see she has lost weight this visit

  the depression she believes there is a man coming

  to destroy things

  and there are bugs

  She constantly buys poison

  I know I can’t talk to her about depression/the drugs

  So I say as gently as I can

  Keep your spirits up/then you will gain back the weight

  On the morning I am leaving

  She dresses up in nice clothes

  And a pair of coral earrings I gave her

  She said she’d been skipping meals

  But on the morning before I left

  perhaps just as a child to show me

  She piled her plate full of scrambled eggs with ketchup

  and she ate.

  RUTH VICK

  I was reticent about posting about my

  first mother’s death on FB

  We weren’t close

  and you know the attention-seeking

  nature of it all

  But then I felt less bad

  when somebody posted about their

  missing pet

  The condolences concerns

  were far reaching

  And then I thought another Black woman

  died today in agony

  Poor Black and alone

  My aunt said the wake was pathetic

  There was no one there

  Said she left after 5 or 10 minutes

  Her brother’s first wife

  My adoptive mom

  My father called me to say she was

  Being buried an hour before I went on stage

  He needed someone to talk to

  I think they said she was cremated

  I was surprised I felt as much as I did

  Given her life-long absence

  I know now in retrospect she was fleeing

  for her life

  from abuse

  She tried to take me

  but that failed

  If you see your father, she said

  Don’t go near him

  But I was four and must have

  missed him so bad

  When I saw the car I screamed Daddy

  and ran to him

  Get in, he said

  and we drove away after he’d

  chased her into the house

  And said I’m taking her/I’m

  taking your daughter away.

  My father remarried

  and his new wife forbade me

  from seeing her

  I was six

  I know though she was sick with many

  things for a long time

  I know she adopted another daughter

  to replace me

  But I know I was part of my first mother’s agony

  on her death bed

  I know I was that pain aching her bones

  Her stomach her head

  I was that baby ghost

  I was that beloved

  I know somewhere she blamed herself

  It’s always the woman’s fault

  My father was a monster I know

  But he was the parent I knew

  I didn’t ask for condolences on FB

  I asked people instead to say her name

  Ruth Vick.

  THERE IS ME/THERE IS MY MOTHER

  It is courageous/

  I am doing that thing now my mother/stepmother could not do.

  She tried.

  She practiced.

  I will never forget the blue suitcase/a square that looked

  almost like an attaché case/only larger

  It was always the same song and dance routine

  whenever she fought wi
th my father

  She’d pull the blue suitcase out of her closet

  She’d pack the case

  Leaving it to sit by the door

  She’d scream to my father, I’m leaving you

  and then the bullet

  I’m also taking your daughter

  You’re coming with me right?

  I really had no choice

  I knew she wouldn’t leave

  and I’d be stuck with her wrath

  I wanted her to go

  I wanted to stay with my father but I couldn’t say that

  My mother tried but never made it further than the stairwell

  Maybe once she made it down the stairs and

  he dragged her back

  Call the police, she commanded to my six-year-old self

  Maybe once or twice she made it down to the parking lot

  and into their car/the emerald green Impala

  Maybe he clung to the side of the car door and threatened

  As Toni Morrison once described in Beloved

  Besides the main character Sethe

  There was a girl so traumatized by her sister’s ghost

  A baby whose throat was slit by her mother

  She could never get past the yard

  I imagine how many slaves tried/as opposed to got away

  How many made it down to the garden or potato patch

  With thoughts and sights on freedom but turned back for fear/

  How many as I have got trapped, could never get their foot loose.

  My mother practiced but could never escape.

  I see the end results/a depression that can’t be overcome.

  Mental illness left untreated

  That eats away her brain.

  She believes there are bugs

  and a man who comes to the house and steals from her

  She buys poison and puts it down daily

  The worst part is that through abuse she’s been made into

  a man’s raggedy doll

  So I am doing now what my mother could not do

  Though it’s late

  Though I should have done it long ago

  Moving away from abuse

  Emptying

  Going back to the beginning

  It’s frightening to start over

  Reshape my own core

  What I do have

  What my mother and I share is an

  Indomitable spirit

  Just when you think it’s impossible/an obstacle can’t be overcome

  There is me/there is my mother

  As in a medical drama when you think the patient

  has lost too much blood

  Suffered too many wounds

  There is me/there is my mother

  It’s like an action drama

  Where the hero fleeing a villain

  Clings for life from a rooftop

  Awaiting rescue/there is me/there is my mother.

  MYSTI

  My mother’s cat Mysti

  Spelled M Y S T I

  Doesn’t just walk/she strides

  black cat/healthy fur/shiny coat looks like bat girl

  It isn’t incidental, she is Black, a girl

  The great survivor in my parent’s lineage of pets

  She although six years old never stops playing and is my mother’s

  constant sidekick

  like me once but an involuntary one in card games and watching TV

  yes this cat strides confident

  has never known war or brutality

  can’t and doesn’t ingest as humans do the daily injustices

  another unarmed Black boy shot twenty times by police

  Mysti doesn’t know the violation of girls

  Hasn’t had her fur touched in peculiar ways

  In fact I was surprised my parents picked her

  Given their insanity, racism, and superstition

  But she has brought my family so much joy and for that

  I love her

  Love that she tilts her head at times when you talk as if she’s trying to listen

  And comprehend

  Sometimes when I visit my father will say to her, “Get in your bed”

  And she lays down on a soft spot in my luggage

  That she finds a piece of red yarn and drops it at my feet

  Inviting me to play

  Something I thought only dogs did

  That when you are alone and pondering she reaches her paw out

  To let you know she is there

  That she lays beside me quietly when I make collages

  And when I finish she sits squarely in the middle

  Once when I was leaving

  She was upset and she raced up and down a hallway

  From my room to the room where the front door is

  And I saw her tiny bat ears peeking above the step

  She is my mother’s warrior against all

  The pawn that she threatens my father with

  If I leave I’m taking my cat

  She knows that’s the dagger

  I suppose the battle in old age is loneliness

  She and the cat miss me

  My mother, an artist, has started doing large scale puzzles.

  They always worked in the basement of the house

  When I call my mother says, “Guess what?”

  “Me and Mysti are now doing puzzles in your room”

  I start to laugh

  I thought about visual artists, how they use the phrase

  Activating the space

  I imagine Mysti and my mother activating the space

  of my family bedroom

  Keeping me there in spirit

  Bringing me home.

  SIDEWALK RAGE

  I’m not sure why but it’s taken forever for me to write this poem

  I hope to remember all the pieces

  But I’ve developed a new condition

  One that’s come from age/I can no longer take the shit I once did

  And there’s a part of my condition that comes from gentrification

  And cell phone use

  Living amidst tech zombies

  And their general fear and hatred of POC

  My condition is called sidewalk rage

  Kind of like road rage

  But comes when walking down the street and there’s some millennial

  Who has just moved into the neighborhood

  who thinks it’s theirs

  a white girl who in broad daylight feels a dark presence

  walking behind her

  It’s me/minding my own business and she gets so panicked and paralyzed

  she stops walking and holds her purse

  with my new condition I yell

  If you don’t want to live around Black people get the fuck out of the neighborhood!

  She is shocked.

  Or in another scenario

  You see random white women on their phones

  Standing in a doorway completely blocking it

  Because you know only they exist

  And you’re like HELLO, HELLO

  Yes, all these years I thought I was still a small town girl and then suddenly

  with my sidewalk rage, I’m a bonafide New Yorker

  like the ones you’ve seen on bicycles banging on the hood

  of a taxi cab that tries to cut them off

  My person with sidewalk rage is a character of their own

  Where once I was silent

  Recently I confronted a man who was blocking my path/crossing the street

  He had his head down and almost rammed into me

  I sucked my teeth loud and shouted HELLO, HELLO, MOVE

  He was so angry I’d confronted him, he yelled, Suck my dick

  I started to yell something profane but I stopped myself

  And then I was in the subway/going downstairs and a white man rammed into me

  On the phone

  My sidewalk rage kicked in and thought fo
r a second to sneak behind him

  And kick him down the stairs

  That’s my sidewalk rage/I stopped myself.

  I don’t know who this person is in me who would never speak up for herself

  Was always soft and vulnerable

  Who’s been at various times pickpocketed, blasphemed,

  body-slammed, ransacked, ridiculed

  Who now has a voice

  Who now lets rage show

  Who couldn’t express herself

  Has now become all angles and sharp edges.

  YOU CAN’T GET OUT FROM UNDER

  I may attach this to another poem and

  I may not

  This may stand on its own

  But these are my jokes

  If you happen to go outside and see some lady/some bitch

  on the street/50-ish

  coat open/it’s under 20 degrees

  don’t yell, Are you fucking crazy?

  Leave her alone, she’s in menopause.

  Zero degrees/hot flash

  And that shit feels good

  Also, if you’re on a bus or a train and you

  really need to sit down/find a Black man

  A big Black man/next to him

  the seat is always empty

  Next to big Black women too.

  Sometimes on a crowded bus to Boston

  The seat next to me is completely empty

  And just so you know I’m in a rage about crudité

  FUCK crudité

  Who eats crudité except for starving first-year college students

  at a book party

  Really what middle-aged person do you know is gonna chew hard

  on a carrot stick at a party

  It’s not a barn.

  You’re not a sheep or some shit.

  I mean, what about sensitivity to people with fake-ass teeth

  I looked over recently at an event and saw some Brussel sprouts

  on a platter of crudité at a party

  Raw ass/hard ass Brussel sprouts

  No one is going to eat raw Brussel sprouts at a party.

  To my point, no one touched them.

  And politics has ruined my ability to enjoy Christmas or escape.

  I love Christmas.

  I watched Frosty the Snowman with my mother over the holiday

  But then politics came in.

  I started questioning if the relationship between Frosty

  and the little girl who loved him was age-appropriate.

  Why did they hug so fucking much?

  I know he’s supposed to be snow but just why was he so fucking white

  Like hundreds of years of patriarchy you can’t get out from under.

  My new accountant has ton of jokes, he’s a Black man

  He said the revolution is coming and

  To those who say they don’t serve Blacks,

 

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