Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970)

by Anderson, Sarah

  “We sure are.” I smiled, feeling my heart slump down inside my chest.

  “Bye guys; drive safely.” Bev called from the foyer.

  “Thanks Mrs. Crawford; see you tomorrow.”

  Eric helped Lucy out to the car, under his sweater, while the rain continued to beat down. He came back for me next and ushered me to the car, opening my door, and helping me in before running around to the other side. An image of a blurred CeCe and Skylar stood on the front porch arm-in-arm, while they waved goodbye to us. I watched from behind my rain-soaked window view. The rest of the short car ride home Eric and Lucy talked about ‘Auntie CeCe and her Prince Christian’ as Lucy nicknamed him. I sat quietly, listening to them banter about CeCe’s wedding and Lucy’s dress. I had my own conversation waging within me of what to do. No matter what happened, people that I loved, would be hurt. If I remained quiet, I knew I would grow bitter with CeCe and myself. I thought about Eric—he was so good to me. He didn’t deserve to be strung along. If I had never known Skylar he would have been the most perfect choice for me. He was everything that a healthy woman and her parents would want for their daughter. Even if I never told CeCe the truth about Skylar, I couldn’t continue on with Eric. I knew that I couldn’t give him all of me. On the other hand, if I told CeCe, she would be hurt and angry. There was no guarantee that anyone of us would end up happy. Skylar obviously loved CeCe enough to ask her to marry him. I could end up causing strife for a lifelong marriage of doubt and mistrust between them. I wanted the best for my best friend. I just didn’t want it with Skylar. The more I thought about my dilemma the more I became confused and upset. My mind wondered back to CeCe. She had kept things from me once when she thought I’d disapprove of her decision. Did she secretly know that Skylar was Christian? How many guys are named Skylar that have a home somewhere in this area? I remembered him telling me he had a home somewhere near here. How could she not have known? Of course, CeCe only listened to about half of what I ever said. She was somewhat obsessed with herself. I felt a sense of guilt with myself for the last several thoughts. CeCe was my best friend—of course she didn’t know. She was happy in love and completely oblivious of her best friend’s plight. She never did anything out of spite and was happy for Eric and me. That was, unless she was jealous that I started dating Eric—was that it? Did she hunt Skylar down just to bring him back and taunt me with him? My crazy mind was creating all kinds of drama. CeCe wasn’t that kind of person despite my heartache and the delirium that had set in.

  “Charlotte, are you okay? You’ve seemed a bit distant tonight.” Eric said as the car rolled to a stop in my parent’s driveway.

  “Yeah, I’m fine.” I said, trying to push away all the thoughts interrogating my mind.

  “I don’t know what happened but I’m pretty sure that you’re just telling me you’re fine so I stop asking about what’s really bothering you right now.”

  He leaned in to kiss me. Eric was sweet and kind and everything good. I felt his lips kiss mine, gently, as I pulled back.

  “I’m sorry Eric; I’m not being honest with you. I’m not fine but I don’t know what I am right now.”

  “Do you want to tell me?”

  “I’ve got to get Lucy to sleep. It’s late.” I said, turning around to see her leaning with her head to the side of the car seat.

  “She fell asleep a few minutes ago.” He said, looking at me. “It’s okay Char; I want you to be honest with me.”

  “You’re so good to me Eric and I don’t deserve you. You deserve a woman who’s going to give you everything you give—back to you.” I said, feeling a heaviness building in my chest.

  “What do you mean?” He probed. “Why do I feel like this conversation ends in you breaking up with me?”

  I looked at him and saw the ache in his expression. I felt sick for hurting this most wonderful man. “I’m afraid so.”

  “Did I do something wrong?” He asked reminding me of the first day he kissed me.

  “No, you’ve always done everything right. I’m just not the person who can give you everything that you deserve. You are a wonderful person and I’m very sorry for hurting you.”

  “Then if I’m such a wonderful man—what is it Charlotte? Why not me?”

  With a tidal wave of tears rushing down, I looked up at him. “It’s Skylar. He’s back.” I said, feeling the sobs caged within my ribs.

  “Lucy’s dad?” He asked, appearing confused.

  “Yes.”

  “When?” He focused on me, wiping my tears with the sleeves of his shirt.

  “Tonight,” I sniffled.

  “Before dinner?”

  “No.”

  “What?” It took a moment of silence. “Christian?” He asked, leaning back in his seat.

  “Yes. Skylar is his middle name. He began using Christian after he finished college.” I said looking at Eric’s broken expression.

  “I don’t know what to say Charlotte.” He said peering through the window with the raindrops steadily beating down.

  “I’m sorry Eric. I never thought I’d see him again. Especially like this.”

  “I guess that explains your upset stomach tonight.”

  I stared back speechless. Nothing I could say could help him to feel better right now. “I didn’t expect this. I don’t know what to do but I know I can’t drag you with me while I try to figure it out.”

  “Do you love him?” He searched my face.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Charlotte, when you love someone—you just know. There’s something that’s undeniable—life-changing about that person. You know when they’re the one—you just hope that they feel the same way about you.”

  “Eric, I’m so sorry.”

  “Did you ever feel that way about me? Before you saw Skylar tonight?” He asked warily.

  “I came close to it. You’re the most perfect guy in the world.” I said, reaching for his hand.

  “Just not the perfect guy for you though.”

  “Eric.” I felt his heartbreak and hated hurting him. “I gave something to Skylar that night that I’ve never been able to get back. I thought I loved him. It wasn’t until I never heard from him that I doubted what I felt. Tonight, on my way back from the bathroom he stopped me. He told me that he felt something special with me too and said he tried to find me many times with no luck.”

  “So, why is he marrying your best friend?”

  “I can’t deny he doesn’t love her. And I don’t know what’s going to happen.”

  “So what are you going to do about it?”

  “He asked me to meet him tomorrow night—he wants me to leave early from the Bachelorette party and give him a chance to explain.”

  “Are you going to?”

  “I have to find out what happened—I need to know. This is the father of my child.”

  “You do need to know. But can you trust him?”

  “I trusted him once. I need to know the rest of the story.”

  “Okay then.” He said. “I just don’t want you to be hurt again if it doesn’t turn out the way you hope it does.”

  “I don’t know what I’m hoping for. Honestly, I’ve already hurt you and I don’t want to hurt CeCe and everyone else involved.”

  “Charlotte, the hardest choices we make in life are always going to hurt someone. One day we will all look back at the choices we made. Some of us will regret not fighting for what was right in front of us the whole time, while others will pay the price of settling for what life gives them. As much as I didn’t want to hear what you said this evening, I needed to hear it from you.”

  “I did tell you that you were perfect, right? And very smart and really handsome, right?”

  “Yes, but you can say it again. You kind of kicked the crap out of my self-esteem tonight.” He smiled back.

  I reached to touch his cheek and stroke it gently. “Thank you for everything; I really do mean everything.”

  “You’re welcome. You’ve only got
one life here and if I’m not the one you’re meant to spend it with—then you should go after the one who is.” He said, tenderly grabbing my hand and pressing it in to his lips.

  I leaned into his chest and stayed there for the next half hour as the rain drenched the earth all around us. Eric kissed me gently once more before we left the car that evening. Like a gentlemen, true to his character, he carried Lucy in under his jacket and came back for me. I hugged him once more on the porch before I waved goodbye to him hoping I made the right decision. When I walked inside, just after 11 PM, my parents, Grandma Rose, and all of my brothers were waiting up in the living room.

  “What is everyone doing up so late?” I asked, surprised by my greeting. “I said you didn’t have to wait up for me.”

  “We want to know about Skylar.” My brother Peter said.

  “What? Richie, what did you say?”

  “Don’t be mad with him. You know you’re brother—he loves you and was concerned.” My mother said.

  “And he can’t keep a secret obviously, Richie.” I said shooting him the stink eye.

  “Honey, did you talk with him?” Grandma Rose asked.

  “Not really. Does everyone need to hear this—don’t some of you have to work early in the morning tomorrow?” I said, eyeballing my brothers who were laid back on the sofas as comfortable as toads on lily pads.

  “Yeah, but this is way more interesting than getting sleep.” Edward said.

  “Mom, Dad, everyone does not need to hear my crazy story. Please make them go to bed.”

  “They’re adults—we can’t make them do anything just like we can’t make you do everything we say.” My dad said.

  “Okay, well I’m going to bed. CeCe’s going to be dropped off in the morning, at nine, for the bridal party spa day. Richie—that means you too so you need to get some sleep so you don’t have dark circles. I do not need an entourage tomorrow, please.”

  “Honey, you really should talk about this to someone.” My mother persisted.

  “I’ve had the craziest night of my life and you want me to regurgitate it all back up? Really?”

  “Yes!” Richie chimed in.

  “Honey, you can’t just let this go.” Grandma Rose asserted.

  “Oh my goodness—you too Grandma?” I asked as they all just sat there waiting for the lights to dim and for some popcorn. “Ughh, so the father of my baby and quite possibly the only person I ever thought I loved who disappeared four years ago came back tonight. My best friend happens to be engaged to him and she’s happier than she’s ever been and has no clue that Christian is my Skylar—and oh yeah, Lucy’s dad. I spoke with him for two minutes in the hallway when I was coming out of the bathroom. He said he needed to talk with me and said that he tried to find me but never could. That’s all I know. I don’t know what happened four years ago. Goodnight.”

  “When are you going to talk with him?” My mother asked.

  “I’m going to talk with him tomorrow night after the Bachelorette party. If we are done with the questions, I’m going to bed.”

  “Don’t be frustrated with us honey we just care about you. This is Lucy’s dad and she deserves a right to know him whether or not we are happy with him.” My mother said.

  “That’s if he gets passed my shotgun first.” My father piped up.

  “Are you kidding me dad?” I said, shaking my head.

  “Nope.” My brothers laughed as my dad responded.

  “Thank you for loving me so much—all of you—but right now I just need some sleep. I’ve got to sort this out myself and I have no idea what I’m going to do.” I said before trudging up the stairs.

  I slumped down just inside my doorway to hear the mumblings of my family talk about my predicament. Lucy was tucked into her toddler bed beside mine, fast asleep. I sat and listened for the next half hour or so before dosing asleep on the floor.

  Chapter 21: Oak & Main

  “Honey, wake up. It’s eight o’clock in the morning. You fell asleep on the floor.” I heard my mother’s voice. “I brought you some coffee.” She said bending down.

  “Thanks mom.” I said peeking one eye open with my mouth open and lying in a puddle of drool.

  “I won’t tell anyone about the slobber but you should probably get yourself cleaned up before CeCe gets here. Also, I made breakfast and you should probably eat something—today might be more difficult than you’ve prepared yourself for.”

  “Do I have to get up? I just want to go to bed and wake up with everything like it was.”

  “That would be nice if that could happen but I’m afraid you’re going to have to face this today.” She said placing the coffee within reach of one of my arms. “This should help to at least pry you off the floor. I made it extra strong—just for you my dear.”

  “Ugh, thank you mom. Is Lucy up yet?”

  “Yep, she’s downstairs with Aunt Juanita.”

  “What? I didn’t know she was coming this weekend.”

  “Yeah, she wasn’t until she heard about Skylar.”

  “Mom—really? Who else is down there? Please tell me that we’re not having a family reunion all of a sudden.”

  “I’m glad you haven’t lost your sense of humor with all of this. No, we are not having a family reunion down there honey.” She took a seat on the floor next to me.

  “Char, are you going to tell CeCe today?” She asked concerned.

  “Honestly, mom I don’t know. I want to but I don’t want to hurt her. And what if I tell her and she’s angry with me? What if I tell her and she still marries him? I don’t even know how he feels about me—what if everyone finds out and no one ends up happy? I’ve already hurt Eric.” I pushed the slobber away from my mouth.

  “Did you tell him last night? He looked unusually unsettled when he brought Lu in.”

  “Yeah, he knew something happened. He’s such a good guy and I hurt him and I hate that I did that.”

  “I think you know that you did the right thing. I like Eric and I think he’s a wonderful young man. He’s been so good to you and our Lucy but I never saw the spark between you two that you spoke of when you talked about Skylar, that summer morning. And I’m not saying that you need to go running after Skylar—if anything that boy needs to come running after you for taking off like he did. But I know you knew that Eric, as perfect as he is, didn’t steal your heart like Skylar has since the moment you first met him.”

  “Mom, what do I do?” I asked pressing myself off the floor.

  “I can’t tell you what to do. I’m praying that you make the right decision.”

  “Can you pray that I’ll know what to do—that it’ll be confirmed—a sign or something, please?”

  “Char, you have the power to change your fate. You’ll know what to do when the time comes.”

  “I know you’ve said that to me since I was a kid. I wish I were still a kid sometimes. I never realized how much easier it was then. Being a grown-up sucks sometimes.”

  “Yes, but the good always outweighs the bad. None of us would want to live a life without Lucy. Life is a blessing no matter the storm.”

  “I know you’re right. It’s just hard right now.”

  “I know sweetie. It’s always darkest before the dawn. I love you—you need to get ready now, sweetie.”

  “Thanks mom. Oh and mom, can you please keep the boys and dad off the front porch when they drop CeCe off please? I don’t want them to say anything to CeCe or Skylar!”

  “I’ll try but just remember your daddy loves you. People do crazy things for the ones they love.”

  “Mom—please don’t let him get too crazy. I have to spend all day with CeCe.”

  “Give your father more credit than that Charlotte.” She said heading downstairs.

  “Okay.”

  I took a quick shower, blow-dried my hair straight and brushed my teeth. I looked in my closet to find something fitting—not too dressy but pretty—something that made me stand out without saying ‘come get me
’. I wanted Skylar to choose me strictly for the girl he met on the beach four years ago—not for my clothes or because he felt obligated with being Lucy’s dad. Not for my book he seemed impressed with either. Oh crap—the book. I had two days left until I had to have the final revisions to Mrs. Kisielewski at the publishing house, if I wanted it published. This wedding and the drama with Skylar had completely taken my mind off of everything else. Up until the last three chapters, the book was based on me and CeCe. The previous ending very much had a different, less theatrical account. The last few days gave me plenty of material to work with but how would the last chapter end, I wondered. My whole life depended on this last chapter. I scanned my closet again and reached for a white pique, just above-the-knee, fitted dress. The scooped neckline, complete with twin pleats was pristine with its thin black leather belt and shaping darts. It showed off my slender waist and was a good combination of femininity and elegance—perfect for a spa day with the sorority sisters and CeCe’s snooty cousins. I threw on a pair of white strappy sandals and headed down the stairs.

  I dreaded what I would find downstairs. Who knew what my father or brothers were up to—let alone, where my Grandma Rose might be lurking.

  “Hi Charlotte,” Aunt Juanita said in her thick southern drawl.

  “Hi Aunt Juanita, I heard you came to see the unfolding drama which is my life at the moment.”

  “No, I came to cheer you on sweetie. You need some good, strong women to steer you in the right direction. Besides, I came to see my baby.” She said, kissing the back of Lucy’s head as she hopped up and down on Aunt Juanita’s lap.

  “Hmm, is that right?” I said tilting my head at her.

  “That’s right dumpling.” She smiled.

  “Well I’m still happy to see you anyway.” I said, holding my coffee cup out to the side so I could reach down to hug her without spilling coffee on her or Lucy.

  “Eat some quiche before CeCe gets here.” My mom said pushing a plate of it in my direction.

  “Yum, you didn’t tell me you made quiche. You purposely made that just for me—didn’t you? She knows quiche is my favorite breakfast food.” I said picking up a forkful to quickly shove in my mouth.