All That Remains

by Michele G Miller

  “Jules?” Austin leans over her, his hand cupping her elbow as she breathes in deep breaths. “What’s wrong? You okay?” His voice is filled with worry, and she nods silently when she can’t speak. She’s using all of her concentration to breathe through the pain.

  Arching her back and pressing her hip out, she tries to stretch. Her sweaty palm lays flat on the table to maintain her balance. The cramps let go some, and she starts to feel relief in her muscles.

  “I’m okay. Give me a second.”

  Austin steps back, giving her a little space while maintaining a light grip on her right arm. When the pain eases to a dull ache, she pushes her hair out of her face with her left hand and stands straight. The whole moment lasted less than sixty seconds, but the pain was acute and she feels the perspiration clinging to the back of her shirt as she rolls her shoulders. She smiles apologetically at Austin’s concerned face.

  “A little side effect from the wreck. I haven’t been getting in enough exercise since June, so when I’m still too long my muscles seize.” His face darkens and she quickly adds, “I’m okay, I promise. It’s like a charley horse, though slightly more annoying. But it goes away pretty quickly.”

  “What kind of exercise?” he asks as they finally make their way out of the diner.

  “Just typical PT stuff, stretches, running. Things to keep my muscles strong and loose. I even do Yoga.” He opens the car door for her, his face thoughtful as she slides into the seat carefully. “Thank you,” Jules offers as he closes the door and makes his way around the car.

  When he opens his side and falls into his seat, he turns to her. “I could do it with you.”

  “Yoga?”

  “Um, no. But I could run with you or do some PT stuff. I’ve been put through the ringer enough; I know a lot of exercises.”

  A small part of her melts at his sweet offer. “That’s… well, you have your own workouts to do. You don’t have time to work out with me. I appreciate it, and all.”

  “I have time. I hit the weights and practice, but I have days off, and we could run at night.” Jules looks at him skeptically. “C’mon, let me work out with you; at least for the next few weeks until your roommates move in and you have others to work out with. It’ll be fun. Besides, if I’m going to be ready for the draft I need all the help I can get.”

  Jules sits there, taking in Austin’s eager face and listening to his explanations. She wants to say no. She needs to say no. But those blue eyes, so similar to his brother’s, are pinned on hers and she finds herself giving in.

  “Okay, I’d like that.”

  “Perfect! Let’s start tonight. I need to work off that lunch.”

  Jules wonders what she’s gotten herself into.

  Six

  West

  West falls to the ground, sweat pouring from every limb of his body as the scorching August sun blazes down on the field at Freemont. Two-a-days in August, or “hell-on-earth” as most players chose to refer to it, take every last ounce of his energy. Running drills, conditioning, weight training: it’s his job, every day. Every football player must take it seriously if they want to play the game, especially West. Since he’s been off of the field for so long, he constantly feels the need to work harder, move faster, and lift stronger to prove he belongs.

  He knows it's most likely backroom favors that landed him a spot on the team. They already had a quarterback lined up for the season before West showed up, but the promise of a Rutledge was too much to turn down. West almost felt guilty when he stepped onto the field the first time to compete for the starting job against the junior veteran player, Casey Wiggs. Wiggs is a good player. He played all-county in high school, but he doesn't have a future in the league. He's playing for the love of the game, and West walks in and takes his position from him in two short practices. It was like taking candy from a baby. When he first walked on, he was nervous Wiggs and some of the other players might resent him, especially since he missed spring training. He also worried about the perception that he'd bought his way on the team. The guys didn't care, though. Wiggs had been put out at first, but the moment the team recognized West’s natural ability they went from irritation at the interloper to seeing a chance at a championship flashing in their eyes.

  “Hit the showers!” yells one of the assistant coaches as more players drop to the ground around him. “You boys are lucky you get this weekend off! Monday we head back to hell!”

  West is pretty sure Coach takes absolute pleasure in stating that fact, but he sits up and claps with the others as they start to head in.

  “Rutledge!”

  “Hey, man.” West acknowledges his favorite running back as he swings his backpack over his shoulder.

  “Couple of guys are heading to A&M territory tonight, trolling for some fresh meat. You in?”

  Shaking the excess water from his hair, West feigns interest. “Fresh meat, huh? What’s wrong with the ones here?”

  “Awe man, c’mon. We’re gonna be confined to campus starting next week and this is our last weekend to see how the honies over there taste. Steve-o said the local joints have been ripe for the picking.”

  “During summer semester?” West’s eyebrow raises slightly.

  “You know those high-brow sorority girls like to keep close to their mansions all year round, bro.”

  They walk out of the locker room together, running into a few more teammates loitering in the parking lot. The afternoon sun, finally starting its lazy descent, casts long shadows across the cars. The temperature is nowhere near as hot as it was only an hour before.

  “Dude, you get our star QB to come?” Steve, or 'Steve-o' as they like to call him, shouts from two rows back. West looks over to see the team’s star tight end leaning against a car with a cellphone pressed to his ear.

  “I’ve gotta pass tonight, but hit me up tomorrow and I might be able to swing it,” West responds across the lot, sending him a wave as he rounds on the other guys in his group.

  “Sounds like a plan. You got a hot piece waiting on you at home, brother?” asks Acker, one of his secondary linemen.

  A few heckles from the other guys follow up the remark. West suppresses the desire to roll his eyes as the mantra ‘boys will be boys’ runs through his head.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know,” he shoots back instead, knowing it’s all a game to these meatheads.

  “C’mon, Rut, hook us up with all the honies whereabouts. I know your bro’s gotta have the lockdown on all the willing.” One of the offensive linemen jokes, jostling around with a couple players in his vicinity.

  “I’ll see what I can find out for you. I gotta run. You guys don’t get into any trouble now.” With a flurry of fist bumps and high fives, West hurries across the lot to his new truck and throws his bag into the cab before his teammates try to stop him.

  As he pulls off campus and turns toward home, Austin pops into his mind. He’s barely seen his brother since practice picked up the first of August. If Freemont practices are considered hard, then A&M practices can be described as brutal. Knowing Austin will have had a tough day on the field, as well, and thinking he might be down for grabbing some burgers and hanging out, he decides to skip the turn home and head towards A&M instead.

  Ignoring the teasing voice in his head, he purposely parks his truck across campus from Austin’s building so he can pass by The Century Tree. He's stopped by the tree a few times since leaving Crestdale; typically, he sits on the bench or stands in the shade and wonders if the moment he shared with Jules here last year under the branches of this 'magical' tree was real. Depending on his mood, the answer varies. A few weeks ago, he was still able to swear to Dani and Dr. Steel that what he and Jules had had was real, was lasting. Since leaving CVC and getting back into the “real” world again, he wonders how long he should wait before he tries to see her. He needs to figure out if there is any hope for them, or if it’s time to move on.

  Move in day for fall semester is Saturday. Two days. Even thou
gh he doesn't know if she ended up choosing A&M in the end he clings to the one small slip up Jeff made about Jules when they were talking a few weeks ago. He said something in reference to Katie coming to A&M and Jules being here already, for something. It was a jumbled conversation, and West wasn't able to get him to clarify it, but the slip up told him she was either here already or would be come this weekend.

  When he hears the light, familiar laughter he freezes. Lady luck must be smiling down on him because, somehow, he’s found himself in the right place at the right time; not fifty feet away, is Jules.

  On his brother’s arm.

  * * *

  Suddenly he doesn’t need to question his feelings; they punch him in the gut the moment he sees her golden strawberry blonde hair. It’s darker now, more red tones and less blonde than it was the last time he saw her. He takes a moment, holding his breath as he watches her walk next to Austin. His first thoughts, after the stabbing betrayal he feels from his brother's presence, are of her walking. Walking and whole, not limping, not forever paralyzed as he’d allowed his nightmares to taunt him.

  When he left the hospital back in December, he’d known she would make a full recovery. His dad had kept him up to date on that small piece of information while he was at CVC, but seeing it in person is more tangible than hearing about it. He smiles at her long, even gait as she walks away.

  The urge to run after them when they turn left and disappear from his view is strong. He takes a step in that direction, then stops himself. His breath is coming out in small pants as his muscles tense. West can barely comprehend what he saw, and yet he can’t deny it was her. His brother, his best friend, was walking particularly close to Jules. The way he tugged her hair seemed intimate, personal. The voice of reason tries to calm him. Perhaps Austin and Jules stayed friends after the wreck? Perhaps they ran into each other one day on campus and they’re hanging out now? It makes sense, except for one crucial part. Austin has kept it secret. In the seven weeks since West has been out of Crestdale, Austin hasn’t said a word about Jules to him. Nothing!

  West pulls out his cell and moves swiftly in the opposite direction of where Jules and Austin disappeared. Finding Austin’s number, he concentrates on taking deep slow breathes, therapy lessons at their best, as he hits “send” and waits for an answer.

  One. Two. Three. Four rings. Voicemail. He ends the call.

  “Ohhh, no you don’t,” he mumbles to himself as he jumps into his truck. He presses “send” again.

  “Hey, what’s up?” Austin answers, his voice curt and a little irritated.

  I bet I know why, West muses, trying to shake the intimate moment he witnessed out of his head. Despite the attempt, there’s no way he can get the small glimpse of her out of his mind, especially after nine months.

  “Hey, man, I’m on campus and thought we could hang. Where you at?” He tries his best to be nonchalant as he pokes for information.

  “You’re here?” Austin sounds stunned. “You should have called earlier. I’m on a date. Wanna catch up tomorrow?”

  It takes everything West has to maintain his calm. He grits his teeth, thinking before he speaks again.

  “West?”

  Circling his truck around, West heads toward the parking lot he watched Austin and Jules walk toward.

  “A date, huh? You been holding out on me? Who’s the chick?” He stalls, his eyes scanning the relatively packed parking lot for a sign of his brother’s blue Nissan.

  Austin clears his throat and West bites the inside of his cheek at the sound. “Just a girl. Look man, she’s waiting. I’ve got to go.”

  “Wait, wait. Since I’m already here, why don’t I go hang out at your dorm until you get back - ?”

  “No! Dude, go home. I’ll call you tomorrow.” A beep signals the end of their call.

  West pulls to a stop, close to the exit of the lot, and waits. Assuming they are leaving campus, there is no way they could have made it out of the parking lot yet. He suspects Austin would have wanted to take West's call privately, so they're either inside somewhere, or he stepped away from her - and maybe she’s in his car, and he answered before he got in. His quick thinking pays off a few moments later when he spots Austin’s little sports car pulling out of the lot ahead of him.

  Seven

  Jules

  “Should you get that?” Jules suggests, nodding at Austin’s phone as he goes to shut the car door behind her.

  “Um, yeah… I guess I should.”

  She tucks her legs into his small sports car and waits as he carefully closes the door behind her. Pulling his phone from his pocket as he makes his way around the vehicle, Austin stops by the driver’s side door to talk. She can’t help but be curious as to why he is standing out there in the heat instead of getting in the car. After another minute, the driver’s side door opens.

  “Sorry,” he offers with an apologetic smile.

  “Everything okay?” He’d looked tense while on the phone; his eyes would occasionally dart over his shoulder towards her, almost secretly.

  “Yeah, it’s all good. Listen, are you sure you’re cool with tonight?”

  His change of subject tells her something’s up, but she decides not to press him.

  “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  They’re going to what the guys call “The Last Chance At Freedom Party” before football season is officially under way. According to Austin and the majority of the team, they ratchet up the hardcore prep for the season Monday and curfews start to get enforced by the team’s captains. Everyone needs to be in top shape to play, so they throw one last end of summer party every year the week before their first game.

  Her eyes take in the campus as they drive through it. She’s been here for twelve weeks now, yet she’s still getting used to it. She barely took the time to explore it during her summer classes, choosing instead to remain in the commons or out on the quad.

  She’s enjoyed the quiet solitude of her dorm with the majority of students not taking summer semester. She also appreciates not seeing reminders of the past every time she turns around too, but she misses her friends. She’s already missed out on so much after the accident and throughout her recovery, and now she’ll miss out on that last summer at home before life starts getting real. Not that she particularly needs more real in her life.

  They pull off campus, Austin’s little baby rumbling and purring as he picks up speed.

  “Are you excited for Jess and Katie to finally get here?” he asks after a few minutes of enjoyable silence.

  “Yes! Don’t get me wrong, the solitude has been nice, but I’m ready to see more of my girls.”

  “Yeah, I know some guys who would like to see more of your girls, too.” Austin laughs at his own joke. “I mean Jess and Katie, not your girls.” He teases, flicking his gaze to her chest.

  She slaps his arm playfully with a shake of her head. “Katie is taken, as you know, but Jess is dying to party with the team. That girl can’t stop talking about getting on campus.”

  The party they’re heading to is at a house in a small neighborhood ten minutes off campus. Many of the homes in the area are rentals for students and she’s been to several parties there, both large and small, with Austin in the past three weeks.

  “You ready for our last party? For a while, anyway.”

  The start of school and football also signals the end of so much free time for them. Jules has come to rely on Austin the past few weeks as someone who can make her laugh, and challenge her physically. His workouts are boot camp worthy and his late night company is priceless. She frowns as Austin exits the car and comes around to her side; she’s going to miss him and their time together.

  “Come on, eye candy, let’s go have some fun,” he teases, offering Jules his hand so she can climb from the car. She laughs so hard that her toes miss the curb and she slips, almost falling to her knees, but Austin catches her.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

  Everything fades awa
y as those six words hit her ears and that voice registers in her brain. The sounds from the party, the color from the street lamps and moon, everything goes black and quiet as Austin’s arms tighten protectively around her. She pushes his arms away, grasping the still open door for support. Standing before them is West, his anger burning a hole through every pore of her body even though he’s not looking at her.

  “My brother. My own brother! Are you serious right now, Austin?”

  Austin’s back shields her view of West as he replies, “What are you doing here?”

  “Is that the… back on campus, is that the call you took?” Jules whispers, raising her eyes to Austin and avoiding contact with West out of completely irrational fear. If she looks at West, she may break down.

  He doesn’t have to answer her, though. She can see it on his face and in the tightness of his jaw. She wonders how West found them. It’s evident, based on his reaction that Austin didn’t tell him they were going to a party.

  “You told me you were going on a date… some chick… imagine my surprise when I saw you with her.” From the corner of her eye, she notices West jerk his head towards her and she grimaces at the way he chooses to not use her name.

  “It’s not just a date.”

  Austin’s voice is smooth and a quiet pause follows. Jules isn’t sure if she should punch Austin or hug him for making the insinuation they are a couple. She has to use all her will to force herself to not look at his face. Instead, she watches his shoulders as they rise and fall slowly, the sign of long, deep breaths.

  “I’m sorry?” West asks brusquely after a moment. The cool tone causes a shiver to run down her spine.

  “I said, it’s not just one date. We’ve been hanging out for the past three weeks,” Austin all but taunts, and Jules draws in a sharp gasp of air.

  Austin shrugs nonchalantly as he tells West they’ve been hanging out. It’s not a lie, but again she is torn between hugging and punching him. This, whatever they want to call their relationship, is between them and them only. As the scene plays out before her, she feels as though she’s in a movie. Everything appears to be moving in slow motion. Her mouth drops open as she sees West’s mind register Austin’s meaning. His eyes go wide and she staggers back against the car as he jumps forward, his fist pulling back with a curse.