“I was a star before the gods plucked me from the heavens,” I said, starting from the beginning of when I became a goddess. “In terms of age, I’m essentially as old as the rest of you, though I have been around since Baladon was first sealed away in his prison.”
“And the orb?”
I stared at my folded hands on the table at Lucy’s question, wondering how much they truly needed to know, but Thorne said I would know what to say. Trying to have trust in myself, I went on. “The orb was created by me with the powers granted to me by all the gods. It was a gateway that led to all the realms of the gods.”
“So, they aren’t all together?” Kate asked with a frown.
“Before Baladon turned, any god could visit any realm unbarred. Afterward, they feared if it were to happen again, they would not be able to stop the threat quickly. He killed several before he was banished. So, the orb and I were created to prevent such action from occurring,” I explained. “We were both placed in a newly created realm and placed under guard and wards. Any god who wished to travel to any realm, without being specifically called there by that god’s creator, had to pass through my temple and use the orb.”
“And you had complete control over any god entering another’s realm, without their knowledge?” Greyson studied me closely as he asked, and I nodded in reply. “A completely neutral party.”
“That was their intent, yes,” I said, “however… it was also a great weakness.”
“But no other god could use the orb, right?” Sabella pointed out. “As long as you controlled it, it was a perfect idea. No god could ever attack another unless they were invited to that realm.”
I said nothing, and the silence stretched on around us. I shifted uncomfortably, hearing that damned voice cackling inside my head. Any second now someone would ask the question I loathed to hear and what did I do? Did I lie? Or did I come clean and confess what happened.
“If that is true,” Forrest asked softly, “how was Baladon able to use the orb?”
Again, I said nothing, but when my gaze met his, he squared his shoulders and growled quietly, seeing the truth in my face. Whether he was only angry with Baladon or me, I wasn’t sure, but couldn’t find the courage to ask.
“What can you tell us about Baladon?” Tristan asked, saving me from answering just yet. “You said he had you for several decades?”
“Fifty years,” I whispered. “There were rumors he had broken free of his prison,” I explained slowly. “But just rumors. I was told to continue my duty as required and never did I expect Baladon to come for the orb.”
“But he’s been out for a while, right?” Sabella asked.
I leaned back in the chair. “In a sense, but he lacked strength to reach the realms of the gods. Hence why he was trapped in the Burnt World for so long. But, he did not start taking gods until… until the day he came for me.”
Again, Forrest growled, and that voice cackled even louder, threatening to drown out whatever was said next. I felt that edge creeping closer as my fury grew, burning white hot within me at being faced with the harsh truth.
“So, he was kidnapping the gods while still in the other realm?” Kate asked confused.
“No, no he did not have power to do so until after he had me in his possession. He needed a power source and what better power source than a star given the power and life of a god,” I mused darkly. I felt Forrest’s intense stare from across the room without even having to look. This was what I hoped to avoid, and I would only tell them what they needed to hear. “Baladon has the orb, and he is able to use it to transport him to whatever realm he chooses.”
“How? I thought only the maker of the orb could use it?” Craig asked.
I’d never wanted to disappear more in my life than in that moment. “I’m afraid I failed in my duty of holding out against him.”
Forrest cursed loudly, and this time I did raise my gaze to his. Immediately, I was struck by the notion again that I knew him. That we’d walked these lands together in another time. Or was it a time that had not yet happened? I shook my head, trying to clear away the image. I was not a seer, but that image remained firmly planted in my mind’s eye.
It’ll never happen… you’ll kill him first… you’ll kill them all…
I cursed the voice inside my head, swearing I would not fail a second time. I couldn’t. Thorne sent me back here for a reason, and I had to find out what that reason was. What my true path was. Nothing was going to stop me from seeing it through.
Is that so? Tell that to your fears, my sweet star. Confront them and put them all behind you then… go back to being who you used to be…
But I couldn’t. I never could. Never would. And a dark part of me that never experienced true anger and the need for revenge screamed that I never wanted to go back. That Mori had been weak, and I couldn’t be weak, not anymore.
“Mori?” Sabella asked gently. “Are you alright?”
“Yes, fine,” I muttered through gritted teeth.
“You sure because you’re glowing,” she stated.
I glanced down at myself to see I was glowing, much brighter than was normal. Speaking of Baladon dragged up so many horrible memories, and my anger was close to breaking free. The voice inside my head taunting me did nothing to help, and now the line between what I felt and what this voice made me feel was blurred. I could not lose control here. I would blow up the room and those here with me. But closing my eyes did nothing to calm me down. All I saw was that evil bastard’s leering face, heard his cackle as he attacked me over and over again.
“You need to go, all of you,” I managed to rasp, my voice heavy with power that was quickly growing out of my control. “Please.”
“We’re not going anywhere,” Sabella stated firmly.
“Please, you don’t understand… this… this isn’t me,” I gasped as it ratcheted up another notch.
I pushed back from the table, ready to run and get as far away from them all as I could, but the voice yelled in fury, and my feet stilled. I clutched at my head. Sabella was saying something loudly, but I couldn’t make out the words. The screaming was all I heard, over and over again. But then it sounded familiar, like the dying voices of the gods. I was hearing them as if it was happening right before my eyes as it had before. My power continued to flare within me, but I was too weakened from Baladon to reign it back in.
This was it. I was going to ruin whatever chances they all had at fighting back against Baladon before they even figured out what this key was, or how to use it. Thorne had been wrong, so terribly wrong to send me down here… then a hand fell on my shoulder, and the screaming cut off as the voice hissed in anger.
“Breathe, Mori,” Forrest instructed sternly, his hand giving my shoulder a squeeze. “You are safe. He’s not here, and he will not get to you again. Breathe.”
He stood behind me, but I could see his face so vividly in my mind it was like the rest of the room fell away, and all that was left was him. The first breath I took was shaky, but the second and third were stronger, steadier, and I drew my power back inside me. The glowing dimmed to its normal vibrancy, and I reached up a hand to hold Forrest’s. How had he done that? And why?
“Thank you.”
“Of course,” he murmured then stepped back, taking his hand with him.
“Are you out of your mind?” I asked as I whirled around, startling him with my bluntness. “Do you have any idea what I could have done to you?”
“And you think I care?” he shot back loudly, seeming confused as I was by his outburst. “You’re not alone, Mori, you have… you have us all, and we’re in this together.”
“What was that?” Sabella asked before I could yell at him again out of worry.
I shrank back from them, not ready to come clean with the truth.
“The darkness,” Forrest said before I could, “it’s within her still. I saw it last night in your eyes, see it there now.”
My eyes flickered around madly, searchin
g for a way out, but no one made a move to grab hold of me or throw me in chains as the voice said they would. Instead, Sabella and Kate both gave me knowing looks and moved toward me. I threw up my hand to keep them back, but they ignored me.
“Mori, you have to let us help you,” Kate told me. “You can’t take this on alone.”
“It’s my burden to bear after what I did,” I whispered, already feeling defeated.
“No, it’s not,” Sabella snapped. “It’s that damned bastard doing this to you, and you can’t let him.”
“What would you know of it?” I lashed out and sagged, holding my head. “I’m sorry, I just… I can’t get the voice out of my head. It’s throwing me off balance.”
“We know because we’ve been there.” Sabella half-smiled as she turned to Tristan. “I was insane before he found me, remember? And afterward… afterward, Baladon tried to influence me, too. He got inside my head.”
“But you got free of him. How?”
“Lots of help from those you see here,” she told me sincerely. “You may have lost the gods for now, but you said it yourself, Thorne sent you back to us for a reason, right?”
“To find my path,” I said quietly and searched for Forrest to find him already staring at me. His face was blank, but his eyes, gods those blue eyes overflowed with worry and from the way his feet shifted, he was holding himself back from rushing to me.
“And we can help you do that.” She glanced at Kate who shrugged. “There’s a lot we think we can help you with actually.”
“And much more to discuss in general. We need your help understanding something.”
“And that is?” I asked Kate.
“Is there any chance Baladon would be able to see what Sabella has seen?”
I started to say no but remembered Forrest’s question from the night before. “You asked of the gods who were seers, Farrah and Devon.”
He bowed his head in acknowledgment.
“He drained Farrah of her powers, her life… there is a chance he has the gift of foresight now.”
“And he could know what I saw?”
“Since she is your mother, I’m afraid so. What have you seen?”
“Something that would have given us the upper hand, but now… now he knows, and he’s going to be coming after everyone in that vision who could stop him,” Sabella sighed. “Shit, Tristan was right.”
“Not that I wanted to be,” he grunted.
“Can you tell us what happened to you first? After Baladon attacked your realm?” Sabella asked me. “Anything could be of help to us now.”
I worried bringing it up would make me lose control again, but Forrest was only a few feet away. I wanted his hand back on my shoulder to steady me, but sensed his uncertainty as strong as mine at whatever was happening between us. Two souls, complete strangers, and yet we had a connection neither one of us could explain.
“Perhaps we should discuss this later,” Forrest suggested.
“No, no I need to tell you what I can, so you can know the truth,” I said quickly, debating if now was the time to tell them about the gods leaving the realms forever. Probably not. After another deep breath and keeping that image of Forrest in mind, I told them exactly what happened to me with Baladon. Told them how he broke into my realm using the man he possessed. How he broke free of him once inside my realm and stayed there until Kate, Forrest, and Craig entered the game, and he realized his chance to be free of that dragon’s body was near.
Up to that point, Baladon had been capturing gods and goddesses, trapping them with me in the realm he created after I told him how to use the orb. I’d heard their cries, their pleading ringing in my ears for so long before some fell silent forever. But I’d been too weak to break free, or to save them. All I could do was hang from those chains and watch, waiting to die myself.
“That orb is giving him the power to travel,” I said by the end of my gruesome tale. A small weight lifted from my shoulders having finally gotten it out, but the mental scars, and real ones, they’d stay with me forever. I sensed the shadow spreading in my mind again, feeding off my anger, but until Baladon was dead, the chances of getting rid of it were slim. “If you can get it from him, it would keep the other gods protected at least. Stop him from creating more realms he could escape to.”
“And what of the darkness over the realms?” Tristan asked. “Will it be lifted?”
“Not until he’s trapped. Or dead.”
“Both options that I’m assuming come at a great cost.” He stared at Sabella, reached out for her hand, and held it firmly. “Do you know where he keeps it?”
“Inside the realm you rescued me from, but the orb you used, it’s gone. You would have to create another one.”
“And we can’t do that because of what we learned,” Sabella muttered.
“What do you mean? You made the first one, you could make a second to at least get into his realm again.” If she did, I would go with her, if only for a small chance to attack Baladon and inflict whatever pain I could on him in payback for what he did to me.
“She can’t because the first time we were drawn into a trap,” Tristan stated with a growl. “If we attempt to enter his realm again, I have no doubt he’ll be there waiting for us.”
I shook my head, not following. “So, then we go in knowing it’s a trap, prepare for it.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“Just tell her,” Kate said sounding impatient. “She’s got a right to know since she’s… well, since she’s part of it.”
Now I was utterly confused. “Part of it? What is it?”
Sabella puffed out her cheeks until Kate nudged her and she threw up her hands. “Alright, alright. Part of my visions, all my visions lately actually. You’re in them.”
“Since when?” Forrest asked the same question I was about to.
“Since I came back from the dead, that’s when. She’s in them and if I can see her in them so can Baladon which means if he’s after the five of us, he’s after her, too.”
I stepped back from them, ready to argue that couldn’t be true, but remembered when Devon attacked us in the garden. That hungry gaze bent on blood, it hadn’t been focused on Thorne, but on me. He’d been after me for Baladon, demanded Thorne hand me over. Why?
“Baladon already took all he could from me,” I uttered. “What more could he want?”
“You, out of the picture so he can stop the prophecy that I’ve seen happening.”
It wasn’t true. I took another step back. How could I be tied to the prophecy? “I’m sorry, but you must have seen wrong.”
“I didn’t,” she said confidently. “You’re part of this mess now. Your path it seems, is here.” She shot a look to Forrest then back at me, but whatever else she was trying to say, I refused to acknowledge it. “Mori, you have to believe me.”
I staggered backward as the voice whispered louder in my mind.
How could you ever hope to stop him? You are nothing, remember? Nothing but a weak failure.
“No… no, I’m sorry,” I mumbled, moving for the door. “The only way to stop Baladon is going to start with getting the orb from him and if you refuse to do that… then I’m not sure I can help you. I’m sorry.”
I was at the door when her shout stopped me cold.
“Can’t or won’t?” she pushed.
From behind me, Forrest growled. “Enough, Sabella.”
“We need her,” she insisted. “I’m sorry, but there’s no time for healing or rest. There’s no time to get over the crap that happened. He’s not going to wait! I might’ve wounded him, but it won’t take him long to heal, not as strong as he is now.”
“And the other gods? None of them can help up us instead?” Kate asked me.
“No, Baladon drained much of their powers. And if the gods that were saved are turning against the others, I’m afraid they’re going to be trapped in the midst of their own fighting.” I nearly said it then, that the gods would no longer pla
y a part in the rest of this war, but they were all looking to me for hope of some kind, and I couldn’t give it to them. “Until I hear word from them, I can’t say whether they’ll be able to aid us or not.”
“And we don’t have time to wait for them,” Sabella added, clearly annoyed.
Forrest growled again, and she glared at him.
“I have told you all I can, but the rest I’m afraid is up to you.”
“Mori, wait.” Forrest reached for my hand.
Our fingers brushed and that vision of us walking together at night filled my mind again. I wanted it to happen, but this time, a shadow rose up behind him, and I screamed a warning for him to run… then I was back in the room, and he breathed as raggedly as I.
“What was that?” he whispered.
“I don’t… I don’t know. I’m sorry.” I tore my hand free and rushed from the room.
I had to leave this place. The longer I was here, the higher the chances I would turn on Forrest and hurt him. That shadow I saw behind him, I would bring that fate down on his head. Whatever he was to me, I could not be the reason his life came to an end in this world.
“You were wrong,” I whispered to Thorne, willing him to hear me. “You were so terribly wrong about me. I can’t do this! I can’t help them! Please, take me back.”
I stood in the middle of the corridor, listening as hard as I could… and the faintest of whispers reached my ears.
Find your path, Mori… find it and embrace it before it’s too late…
“That’s it? That’s all you’re going to tell me?” I ranted.
Several shifter guards watched me warily.
I ducked my head and rushed through the castle until I was outside in the courtyard, completely alone. “You can’t just throw me down here! Who is he to me? Who?”
But there was no answer, and I paced furiously back and forth. Sabella saw me in her visions, and so Baladon was after me, but what exactly did she see? Me, doing what? Betraying them in the end because that’s all I sensed would happen if I tried to do anything except get my revenge against Baladon…
Stars (Dragon Reign Book 8) Page 7